Out of Oblivion
by Elvirina
Summary: COMPLETE. Bella decides to start taking chances on life. It pays off and she encounters opportunities she had never foreseen. Inadvertently her choices have consequences on the people around her, most of all her boss Edward. Drabble, canon and slash.
1. Day 1, Prologue, Angela

**We all know who owns these enchanting characters. I wish I did, but Stephenie Meyer does. They just mess with my head, having a will of their own. **

**This is my first attempt writing a drabble, but lately I have found I enjoy the fast pace and intense plots. **

**I hope you will like my story. Nuff said.**

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**Out of Oblivion**

**Prologue:**

**Day 1:**

**Angela**

Angela shuffled her feet, staring down at her knotted hands. "Uhm, Edward?" she called warily from the door. Her boss was torturing his hair, probably going over numbers that weren't as good as he wanted them to be.

He wadded up a section of papers and tossed the ball towards the trashcan. "What, Angela?"

"You know that assistant that works here? Uhm, my assistant?" She cleared her throat.

Edward peered up through the dark fringe of his lashes as she captured his attention. "What about her?"

"She quit."

"Again?" Edward's brows shot up incredulously. Angela nodded. "You're about the nicest person that I know. How is it possible that you can't manage to hold on to an assistant?" His eyes were somewhat guarded, wary even.

She smiled briefly. "It may have something to do with the fact that they can't strap my terribly handsome boss down or the fact that they have their own agenda—correct that—music career to fulfill… or perhaps, even a combination of both?" she phrased her statement as a careful question.

Edward snickered, but valued the fact that Angela didn't beat around the bush. "I confess that I'm to blame once again. She kind of, sort of, may have come on to me last night. As a side note, this one tried to black mail me, but I had the courtesy to inform her that my office is monitored in case gross moral turpitude were to occur in here. When she realized she had no leverage, she left." Edward's eyes were apologetic. He hated the fact that his looks had cost his favored assistant yet another set of hands to help her out.

Angela smiled ruefully. "Little do they know." Edward smirked in response. "So that's why she quit," Angela interceded and sighed. This wasn't the first time that this had happened.

"I'm sorry, Ang," Edward said sympathetically.

"It's not your fault, Edward. It's just that I have the sales portfolios to finish on top of everything else. I'm not sure how to manage it all by myself. Oh… I don't mean to whine about it."

"You're not whining, Angela. It's not your fault that I'm hopeless at finding you proper help." His eyes sparked with sudden enthusiasm. "How about I leave myself out of the decision process this time and you have free reign on who you want to hire to help you out."

"Edward!" Angela gasped.

"I'm serious, Ang. It's your job, your assistant and your call. What would I do if you decided to quit because I'm a hopeless boss?"

Angela quirked a brow. "Stuff envelopes yourself?"

"Hardly." Edward chuckled. "Listen, call a temp agency and see who you can find. You need the help this week. Make it work."

Angela's pose relaxed at the thought of not having to deal with this week on her own. "You knowyou totally sound like Tim Gunn."

"Who?" Edward's brows shot up.

"Über hot and über gay guy from Project Runway. You should know him," she snidely countered.

"Very funny, but I thought the name sounded familiar. Alice has a huge crush on him. He's the man with the silver hair, right?"

"Right. I'll get back to work." Angela's eyes were suddenly calculating. "Aro's holding auditions today, correct?"

"I believe so," Edward answered, with a puzzled look. His thoughts honed in on the peculiar man in the offices a floor above his. A small smile curled at his lips. "Who the hell holds auditions for receptionists?"

"Aro." They groaned in unison, knowing the answer.

Angela bit her lip to hold her tongue, but she couldn't. "I think he takes pictures for his own personal gratification," she mumbled.

"I wouldn't be surprised if he did," Edward answered. "What are you planning to do?"

"Trying an untapped resource. If it doesn't work out, I'll call the temp agency." She paused before heading out the door. "You sure that you don't want a say in whom I pick?"

"Absolutely none. I want absolutely nothing to do with whom you chose. Look where it got you so far! You may want to aim for someone who at least knows who the President is if you're going to Aro's."

"Duly noted," Angela said, grasping the handle to close the door behind her.

"How's Ben doing?" Edward asked with concern, almost as an afterthought.

"He's fine. It wasn't his appendix, just a nasty stomach bug." Internally, Angela was thrilled that Edward made the effort to remember that her boyfriend had been sick last week and he cared enough to ask how he was doing.

"Glad to hear it."

"How's your Ben?" Angela asked cautiously.

"He's good. Pretty great, actually." Edward's smile was small, but warm. His phone started buzzing as Angela closed the door behind her.

Taking advantage of her newfound inspiration, Angela swiftly moved for the elevators. The Elevator music seemed to drag to an end as the small 'ping' sounded and the doors slid open.

Perhaps, this wasn't such a great idea after all. At least a hundred and fifty people—correct that—women were huddled in the lobby of Aro's Casting Bureau. Most of the women were blond, in short tight skirts, and wore tops with plunging necklines. They were absolutely no good to have working anywhere near Edward Cullen. They had tried that, even the girls with nice credentials seemed to swallow up his charm and forget to focus on the reason why they were here in the first place—which was to work. As a side note, women weren't really Edward's point of focus.

Searching the throng of women, excluding one after the other, Angela quickly gave up hope. Temp Agency it was then.

A slight form emerged from the crowd, aiming steadfast for the elevator. She was different from all the others. Sure, she was in a somewhat tight skirt, but hers went below her knee. Her crisp white blouse was buttoned—all the way to the top. No nail polish, hardly any make-up, and what seemed to be really long hair neatly braided and rolled into a sensible bun at the back of her neck.

_Bingo!_

"Who's the President?" Angela asked bluntly.

"Which country?" The girl asked timidly, while raising her brown eyes to meet Angela's face.

Edward's assistant gaped. "The United States of America?" The _'where else'_ was left unsaid.

"Well, the answer can only be as good as the question. You might as well have been referring to the President of France, who in that case would have been Nicolas Sarkozy. However, now that you clarify, Barack Obama," she answered quietly. Though her words were somewhat snide, her tone wasn't.

Angela smiled. "You need a job?"

"Desperately," the girl answered without hesitation.

"You're hired. Come with me."

"Where?" The girl asked, digging in her sensible heels.

"Downstairs, to my office. You got yourself a job." Angela pressed the button, calling the elevator.

"Doing what exactly?"

"You're my assistant," Angela clarified.

"And what do you do?" The brown eyed woman asked.

"I am Edward Cullen, Executive Director of Cullen Music's assistant," she answered, while impatiently pushing the button again.

"So basically, I would be Edward Cullen, Executive Director of Cullen Music's Assistant's Assistant?" She quirked a brow.

"Sounds about right. Is there a problem?"

The brown haired girl shrugged. "Not for me."

"Good. Do you have a name?"

"Bella Swan."

"Angela Webber." They shook hands as the elevator opened. "Welcome to Cullen Music."

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**So this was my first chapter. What do you think? Do you want to read more?**

**I want to use a few words thanking Chartwilightmom for her loyal support every time I lost my mind and chase a plot bunny around. She's an awesome listener and pushed me to write this. Thanks for pre-reading and encouraging me.**

**Thanks to my faithful beta Dazzled Eyes22 for her skill and thoughtful feedback.**

**As said this is a drabble so updates will be once a day, don't kill me if I miss one on occasion, and the pace will be fast.**

**Now, please leave me with a thought and I will see you all tomorrow.**

**I'm on Twitter. Elvirina_Nelly**


	2. Day 1, Tuesday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyer I am not, I just play with her shiny new toys. They're so much fun. **

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**Day 1:**

**Tuesday**

**Bella**

Life sucked. Life really, really sucked sometimes. Moving to L.A. was something Bella had looked forward to and had constantly battled the excitement bubbling in her stomach until the day arrived. With the security of a job, a job that she was thrilled about being offered, everything seemed to play out from the sunny side of life in this sun-drenched state. Little did she know that yesterday would be catastrophic.

Bella groaned picking up the phone on the fourth ring. "Hey, Daddy," she chirped, hoping to sound chipper.

"Oh no, Bells. What happened?" Her father's voice sounded rusty. Bella's dear sweet father, who was so far away, back in the small town of Forks, was always concerned with his only daughter. Though she would never tell him, a hug and the chance to bury her face in his ragged shirt would probably alleviate some of the defeat that she felt. Though, right now that wasn't possible.

"What makes you think anything happened?" she lied through her teeth.

"First of all, you only ever call me _Daddy _when you're sad. Besides that point, you didn't pick up all afternoon and evening yesterday, which means that you switched off your phone because you didn't want to talk to anyone. You do that when you're sad. So what happened, sweetheart?"

Bella pushed back the groan. It was embarrassing and too telling that her father knew her so well. It summed up one simple fact. She didn't have much of a social life. "Uhm, well, the company that hired me went belly-up last Friday, but no one bothered to tell me about it. So, I'm unemployed again."

"Oh, honey. Come home again. You can get a job at the bookstore in Port Angeles. That's good work and you get to read."

She couldn't give up on the career that she always dreamed about. Not that there was anything wrong with that book store or the reading, it just wasn't what she dreamed of. No, what she dreamed of was flushed down the toilet yesterday when she found the offices to Young and Uley Publishing House was empty, chained and locked.

"That's not exactly what I'm aiming for, Dad." Bella paused, while putting the spoon down besides the avocado that she has slathered with sour cream, lemon and salt.

"I see, but put that comfort food away and just come back home."

Bella frowned. "I'm not eating?"

"You mean that poor avocado drowned in sour cream is not for you?"

Bella gaped, while staring at the tiny peephole in her front door across the room. That only worked one way, right? The thought that her father had followed her to L.A. just to make sure that she was safe crossed her mind.

"Listen, honey. I know you and I love you. You're a sweet and pretty predictable girl."

"I'm not that predictable," she mouthed, as she picked up the spoon licking off the sour cream.

"Yes, you are."

With that, Bella knew that her father was right. She really needed to change and that was more than just her questionable wardrobe. She really needed a makeover of her personality. In her heart of hearts, she was tired of being a footnote in her own life. The move to L.A. was supposed to bring her out of oblivion, but the fact that Young and Uley had even forgotten to send her a notice about the foreclosure said one thing loud and clear.

Bella Swan was utterly forgettable.

Throwing a harrowed glance at a local gossip column, a full-paged ad screamed at her.

Well, if that wasn't like staring the beast right in the face!

"Look, Dad. I'm not coming home. I actually have another interview this afternoon. It looks promising." God, she was a horrid liar. Mentally, she started a checklist of what she needed to learn in this life and learning to lie smoothly was at the very top.

"You serious?" Her father asked incredulously, still somewhat awed.

"Yeah. Look I really should be getting ready."

Saying their goodbyes, Bella felt somewhat awful for telling that little white lie to her father, but what she didn't need right now was her father berating her about just how predictable and boring she was. She already knew that.

Making the next mental note, her makeover started now. Bella Swan would take whatever challenge came her way. That would be her way to escape being unnoticeable in her own life.

So what if the ad was hardly an interview like she told her father, it was an AUDITION.

oooooOOOOooooo

This was a mistake. A huge cataclysmic mistake of epic proportion. Everything that normally lopped Bella Swan in with the general female race was shriveling in humiliation right at this moment. Feeling like her father was right, she knew that she should just go home and give up this stupid dream of being someone of consequence. Her mind was a blur trying to escape this hoard of beautiful women who looked nothing like her. Clearly, Bella had missed the memo explaining how receptionists dressed in L.A. because clearly her pitiful cleavage and too long shirt was so not in vogue.

Bella's personal distress was so bad that the only thing that she could answer when some tall thin woman asked if she needed a job was _'desperately'_, well, along with a bunch of other snarky responses she couldn't really remember.

"You okay?" The person bringing her salvation suddenly asked. Bella wished that she could remember her name, but it was lost, probably downstairs with all the bleach those women use to attain all that platinum blond hair.

"Mmm hmm. Yes, I'm fine. Thank you." Bella smiled, though her knees felt like jelly.

"Okay. Here's your desk, computer and back there is the copy room." The slender woman turned in the opposite direction. "At the end of the hall, there are two recording studios." The woman paused. "I'll talk you through your first assignments, but I really need you here to work overtime this week. Is that a problem?"

Bella looked up to meet the woman's face. "It's not a problem." It wasn't like she had people to see or places to go anyway.

"Okay. I need to get to get your salary settled with Edward and I'll need all your information, so we can get you logged into the system." She paused her brisk rundown. "A few notes for you and you will do fine. Keep your desk fairly in order, turn off any unnecessary lights and never leave dirty coffee mugs around. The boss can be a bit finicky at times."

Bella nodded. "Anything else that I need to know… Angela?" she mouthed when the assistant's name finally decided to pop into her head.

"Not really, but perhaps it's best if you stay clear of Edward as much as you can." The woman smiled wryly.

"Edward?" Bella mouthed, while gesturing with her hands pressing for information on her new boss.

"Oh." Angela pointed to the office to the left and the man sitting at the desk. He looked up briefly, but quickly returned to his phone, texting, while wearing the most adorable and heart-dropping beautiful smile.

Typical, she got a job working for freaking Adonis' better looking and finicky brother.

More importantly, she never really had a crush on any man because that part of her had malfunctioned at birth. Though staring at that chaotic hair, which was picking up a hint of copper from the sun, and a charismatic grin rolling from his lips, her heart beat a little faster.

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**Soooo… You still with me?**

**Tomorrow you get to hear from Edward.**

**Thank you to the huge crowd of you that added me to your alerts and the few who actually did comment. I feel so honored. *wipes tears* With that said, how do I get the rest of you to speak up? #Ponders.**

**Just so you know. I know next to nothing about working in the music industry, so I ask for your forgiveness in advance if I screw up.**

**Big thanks to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for your undying support.**

**Twitter is where you can find me. Elvirina_Nelly**

**Well, I'll be back tomorrow… Until then check out my other stories.**


	3. Day 1, Tuesday, Edward

**Bowing and thanking Stephenie Meyer for my toys, but I am only borrowing.**

**Edward's Ben is loosely based on Benjamin from Amun's Coven.**

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**Day 1:**

**Tuesday**

**Edward**

Edward tightened his grip on his phone, hesitating to answer.

"Edward?" his father prompted.

"Yeah, Dad," he hedged.

"Is there something wrong?" Carlisle asked, sounding quite worried.

"No, nothing like that. I'll be home for lunch Sunday. No worries." He sucked in a deep breath, venturing into unknown territory. He pulled in another breath, his chest swelling with anxiety. "Would… would Mom and you be okay if I brought a guest?" Edward wished that he didn't sound so damn careful. He felt like an errant teenager asking for forgiveness for a clusterfuck of a mistake.

It was silent for a long time on the other end. Edward knew his father understood his underlying message. By asking to bring along a guest, it wasn't just any guest. He just asked his father permission to bring his lover along for a Sunday lunch.

"Uhm… son, er… are you ready for that? I mean, don't get me wrong, but you don't sound too comfortable right now."

"I'm just nervous. That's all." Edward raked his hand through his hair, probably for the tenth time. It was about a year ago that Edward chose to air to his father that he was pretty sure that he preferred the company of men in the bedroom opposed to women. The subject had been brought up sporadically, but none of his family members had ever met any man that he had been dating. Not that there were many, but he had had lovers since college in all honesty. So, bringing his friend slash lover slash not yet labeled boyfriend home for Sunday lunch was like coming out all over again.

"I understand," Carlisle said kindly. "So who is he? Is it someone serious?"

Serious? Edward mulled over the word. Was it serious with Ben? He wasn't sure. They dated, they spent more nights together than apart, they were exclusive and Edward liked him – a lot. Did that sum it all up and label it to be serious? He wasn't sure.

"I don't know yet, Dad. He's very nice. You'd like him."

"What's his name?" His father asked with interest. So far, coming out of the closet wasn't exactly a problem. His family hadn't been judgmental, but just needed a little time to adjust to the idea of their son or brother being gay. That was understandable to Edward. It was Edward himself that needed to come to terms with the fact that he had spent the most of eight years doubting himself and his preferences, though he had solely kept the company of men.

"Ben. Benjamin Vasquez."

"Look, Edward. My next patient is here, so I need to cut this short. If you want to bring Benjamin, then by all means you're very welcome to, but please make sure that you are ready to take that step. There's no pressure from us, but we would love to meet any man that is important to you."

Edward drew a sigh of relief. "Thanks, Dad. I'll see you Sunday."

At that, the line went dead.

Edward ran his hands down his face, knowing that he just took one major step. Was he ready? Well, there was no time like the present to test that theory. He looked up to catch Angela coming back downstairs with someone trailing behind her. Immediately his assistant was showing the new girl her workspace. Looking distractedly at his phone again, all that he managed to see of the woman was the brown hair neatly tied to her head.

Keeping his promise to Angela, Edward kept his distance and didn't go out to introduce himself. Being somewhat rude was definitely preferred to losing Angela as his assistant.

Edward sat back and observed his own little empire. It wasn't much yet, but he was slowly gaining some ground in the music industry. It was a tough place to make it, but he still had the upper hand not trying to get a contract, but being able to offer them. That reminded him, when he picked up his phone again. Sliding his finger over the glass screen, he pushed up the text box.

**Hey. Would you like some company tonight because I know that I would? E**

The response was instant.

**Sounds intriguing. What's a hot shot like you offering? B**

Edward smiled. Even while texting, his blood started tumbling through his veins.

**Oh, I can think of a few, but unfortunately, I need to go to the valley to check out a band. Come with me? However, later… only time will tell. E**

**Promises, promises. You can bet MY ass that I'll hold you to that. Literally. B**

Edward's heart started to pound, clearly remembering what Ben's body felt like against his own. Hard, wanting and sweaty…

**Smart mouth! *Swoons anyway* I'll be at your place at seven. Miss you. E**

**You know where to find me. It's just a short elevator trip. I could use some testosterone today. It's a mad house up here. B**

Edward laughed loudly just having discussed the audition in full swing upstairs at Aro's, where his lover worked.

**Poor you. However, I think the general male species would love to trade places with you in a heartbeat. E**

**You, too? B**

**No. I would love to treat you, not trade you. See you tonight. I got to work. E**

**Glad to hear it. Looking forward to you treating me tonight. B**

Edward hauled in a deep breath to stop the heavy drumming of his heart, before he took a crack at that numbers that simply needed to be a little bit better.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Now you have met Edward… Any thoughts?**

**Thanks to all of you reading and adding me to your alerts. Especially thanks to those who chose to comment. It means the world to me. A few of you have found me on Twitter Elvirina_Nelly hello to you.**

**Eternal gratitude to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for sticking with me.**

**Ta-Ta until tomorrow where you'll hear from Bella again.**


	4. Day 2, Wednesday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight, I just wish I did.**

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**Day 2:**

**Wednesday**

**Bella**

The job was pretty easy - booking appointments, confirming appointments, sorting through demo tapes, keeping the studios tidy and by all means, keep food and drinks away from the equipment, procuring whatever any recording artist craved within reasonable sanity, stuffing envelopes, printing layouts. With the latter, Bella was realizing that she was going to have very personal relationship with the massive printer in the copy room.

Angela was extremely concentrated on putting the latest touches to a layout for both portfolios, advertising material, and invitations for a release party of the newest album for some band that Bella had never even heard off. It appeared as if she was the only one though.

All of the material the mean machine was spitting out needed to be assembled, folded, packed and sent out by Friday.

Making a quick coffee run, Bella decided this was actually a pretty exciting day. Angela turned out to be a sweetheart. Though she was stressed as hell, she was never annoyed when Bella needed to ask just one more question to get a job done.

Handing over the caffeine, Angela smiled gratefully. "You're a doll. Thanks. I would never normally make you do coffee runs for me, but I really need to get this done."

"It's perfectly fine," Bella said and sat down. She cast a fleeting glance into her new boss' office. She had yet to meet him and he seemed pretty evasive to her. She took a thirsty pull from the straw of her own iced coffee. Delicious.

"The next load is ready," Angela said, while peeling the lid off her coffee, inhaling blissfully. "Brewed by the gods. Double shot?"

Bella set her drink aside and headed for the copy room, passing the four other employees at Cullen Music that she had met yesterday. "Of course," she called over her shoulder.

Coming back with the still warm prints in hand, her new boss loomed over the back of Angela's desk with his long elegant fingers resting on her chair. "It looks perfect, Ang," he said and Bella was stunned that his voice was so soothing, almost melodic.

"I'm just worried that it isn't good enough. I was thinking that if we move this section here, adapt the colors and then have the drop down come from here, the layout will have so much more balance. Look, if I just real quick…" she moved the mouse around swiftly. "There. Don't you think so?" Angela peered expectantly up at Mr. Cullen.

"You are totally right. It's so much better. Send that mock-up back, have them adjust it according to your notes and tell them we don't want to pay for their first attempt, only the layout we'll end up using. You're an ace and you really should be doing the PR, when the people we pay can't seem to get it right." He paused rising to his full height.

He was taller and more much lean than first anticipated. His suit pants hung low on his narrow hip and the fitted tailored shirt just hinting at what was underneath. His clothing was understated, but hardly cheap, Bella decided. He was seriously a fine specimen of a man.

"Is the new girl working out?" he asked.

"Yes. Perfectly," Angela answered. Bella immediately cleared her throat to make her presence known. The assistant swirled in her chair. "Oh, here she is now. Edward, this is Bella Swan, aka life saver, and Bella, this is Edward Cullen, aka boss." Angela smiled.

Balancing the heavy stack of prints, she held one hand out. Her boss' suddenly intense green gaze felt like tongues of flames licking her skin, so… so hedonistic for some odd reason.

"Hi," Bella whispered.

"Welcome… Ms. Swan." The beautiful man smiled, but the moment their hands clasped his smile faltered to a hard, but still polite twist of his chiseled lips.

"Thank you," Bella barely muttered when that gorgeous face turned wary, perhaps even annoyed.

"Angela should be more than able to help you with everything you need," he said, dismissively.

Taking her hand back to leave the prints on her desk, Bella's heart constricted. Angela had nothing but kind words for their boss, though she had advised Bella to steer clear of Edward Cullen. Perhaps, she saw a different man than his stunning creature looking so exasperated over a simple meet and greet. "She already has," Bella finished, while trying not to appear too impolite. She set about her work again. However, her boss had already turned away going back to his office and shutting the door.

While hampering through the monotone work, Angela chatted away about her boyfriend and her twin baby brothers. She really was very nice, but Bella's mind couldn't really escape that odd greeting that her new boss had given her.

After lunch, Angela told Bella to make sure that studio A was stacked with things like water, sodas, lollipops and fruit roll-ups. A half an hour after making a swift run down the street to the store for assorted kinds of candy, it was clear why sugary treats were needed. A mixture of four '_emo'_ and '_I'm pissed off at the world'_ looking boys arrived.

Angela leaned to Bella's side when one of the guys was done ruthlessly flirting with her. "They may think that they are men, but inside they are still just boys." Bella caught a glimpse of a greasy haired boy chewing away at a lollypop smirking at Angela.

Without even acknowledging anyone, Edward joined the boys at the studio.

"He's producer, too?" Bella asked Angela when the door closed behind him.

"Yup. It's a small company, so we all have several job descriptions. Though, Edward owns the place, his heart is in the music and not the managing."

"I see," Bella answered thinking about Edward compared to the boys. In Edward's presence, it was abundantly clear that the rising stars were nothing, but boys and Edward was a man… a stunning god-like version of a man.

Balancing the large box of Taco Bell on her knee perched against the wall, Bella knocked with the other. After being permitted entrance, she carefully opened the door. The room was gloomy lit. Two of the boys were lounging on a black leather sofa, while the two other boys with sadistically long black hair, entirely too slathered with some kind of gel, was singing behind a glass wall. Edward was leaning his head in his hand and listening attentively with his eyes closed. Bella understood why. The dual voices streaming from some sort of speaker that seemed to surround them were absolutely ethereal.

Bella sat the food down keeping it as far away from the equipment as possible and placing it on the table where she left the candy earlier. It was now picked apart and wrappers were littered all over the floor. While Bella quickly picked up the trash she couldn't help, but listen to the boys that had voices like… angels.

Slowly she stood and stared. "Is there anything you need… Isabella?" Edward's voice startled her out of her reverie. Magnificent green eyes lingered on her face, just as heat started to creep into her cheeks.

"Stunning," she mouthed looking at Edward, though she really meant the singing. "I mean…"

"I'm sure you do," Edward's voice had taken on that dismissive timber again.

"Excuse me," Bella muttered, quickly escaping that intense man and the overwhelming music.

What was happening to her, she thought. It felt like her heart was beating out of her chest.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Sooooo they finally meet… any thoughts?**

**Thanks to Chartwilightmom for pre-reading and Dazzled Eyes22 for her advice and beta skills. Without you I would be lost.**

**I hope my responses to your thoughtful comments are satisfactory, because it means everything to me when you speak up. Thanks to those of you who once more added me to your alerts. **

**Tomorrow ladies… things may get a little hot. Edward is back. See a pattern?**


	5. Day 2, Wednesday, Edward

**This is Stephenie Meyer's kids, not mine.**

**Okay, boy boy smut… I never done this before and for a very obvious reason I never will. **

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**Day 2:**

**Wednesday**

**Edward**

There was only one way to describe the day - frustrating. After about an hour of staring at his computer screen in utter aggravation, Edward had given up on trying to figure out why he felt a strange rush of elation shaking Isabella Swan's hand. There was no point and he really wanted to avoid another Edward induced situation for Angela. She didn't deserve it.

Then there was the long day at the studio. They boys were the epitome of talent, but also in possession of an epic ego and they were only seventeen years old. Working with them was sometimes like trying to mix oil and water. It wasn't easy.

Receiving a text from Ben, Edward figured out exactly what he needed and it was what he hadn't gotten last night. Getting back from the concert the evening before, they had both been tired, just wanting to go to bed. So that was what they did, but tonight, Edward needed something entirely different than sleep.

After kicking the door closed to his apartment around eleven at night, Edward's body was humming with the need for release. He looked at Ben's dark hair that curled just behind his ears because he hadn't gotten a haircut for a while. Edward reached out and threaded his fingers through those cute little swirls. Ben had been about ready to call it a night at his own place, but sometimes Edward had a way of being very persuasive.

Unable to help himself, Edward crushed his lips to his lover's. Ben wasn't unreceptive. He never really was, but Ben's kiss wasn't as hurried as Edward's.

"You're so tense," Ben breathed, when Edward skimmed his teeth along his jaw.

"Don't I know it," Edward pulled back, while offering a small apologetic smile. This wasn't usually like him. Sure passion was welcome, but attacking your lover because something had your pants in a twist was not.

Ben palmed the side of Edward's face, while he let his tongue sweep over his lower lip. "Whatever you need." Ben cocked a brow when offering.

Edward knew exactly what he needed.

Ben shrugged out of his cardigan and the olive skin on his arms was a delicate feature that Edward enjoyed. Kicking off his shoes, Edward stepped up behind Ben, letting his breath feather across his lover's skin. Knowing exactly what that did to Ben, he softly kissed the exposed span of his neck.

Still being without label, they had been together for about three months. At the beginning of their affair, they had agreed that this was about having fun and nothing too serious. They enjoyed each other's company… a lot.

"Benjamin," Edward whispered, purposefully using his full name. He knew Ben's knees went soft when he did that and with the mood he was in, he needed Ben amiable. "I'd like you to go upstairs, get undressed and wait for me."

Ben's head rolled back, resting on Edward's shoulder. "Yes," he sighed contentedly.

The lovers weren't having a BDSM relationship of any kind, but sometimes, just sometimes, Edward liked telling Ben what to do and Benjamin just loved to be obedient and complacent. This was where they were, oh so, compatible.

Taking his time, while slowly downing a glass of water and searching for a way to feel calmer, Edward skimmed the front page of the L.A. Times that his cleaning lady had left on the kitchen counter. Edward only wanted to draw out the anticipation. He knew exactly what he would find going upstairs to his bedroom and it was precisely what he wanted.

Opening the door, he was absolutely right. Ben was sprawled naked on the bed with his hands resting behind his head. He was a beautiful, muscled and athletic man with a lovely happy trail drifting south to the fiercely trimmed black hair surrounding his erection. The wait and anticipation worked like a charm. Ben wasn't breathing quite so evenly anymore.

With a heated gaze that followed his every move, Edward started to undress, knowing Ben was eating him in with his eyes. Naked and crawling over him, Edward kissed the exposed plane of Ben's firm stomach, leaving his hand to just rest teasingly light on his lover's hard shaft. The other man's breath trembled.

"I want you," Ben whispered. His heels started to dig impatiently into the mattress, twitching his hips up against Edward hand.

"And I want to be in you… perhaps," Edward teased, while dragging his tongue over his lover's sensitive nipple. "Patience and you will find out," Edward said simply. He bit down, tugging gently with his teeth.

Ben grunted somewhere between displeased and aroused. Edward moved to place a very light kiss on Ben's parted lips. "All good things come to those who wait."

"Is that so?" Edward's lover sounded so needy, just the way he needed right now. Covering Ben's lips with his mouth, Edward didn't need to coax Ben's lips apart because he was already sliding his tongue out to meet Edward's. They both groaned, as the temperature in the room seemed to rise.

"That is a matter of fact." He let his mouth drift south, so far south that Edward took Ben into his mouth sucking his swollen sex. A tear of pre-cum escaped Ben's erection when Edward swirled his tongue around the head. "Hmmm, you taste so good," he mumbled around his lover.

"Not half as good as your mouth feels," Ben's words were strained by a guttural moan.

Bringing Ben to the brink of his orgasm, Edward's mouth vanished with a pop. Reaching over and grapping the relaxing lube and a condom, he watched Ben carefully. Leaning down, while supporting his weight on his hands, Edward kissed him soundly again. "Turn over, baby."

Ben's breath hitched and he let out a slow deep exhale. While Ben settled on his stomach, goose flesh rose along his spine. Edward started kissing that pebbled path all the way down to the crease of his ass. Ben arched up, clearly wanting what Edward offered. Spreading his lover's cheeks, he dragged his tongue over that sensitive entrance.

Ben's slow moan was positively wanton.

After kissing, nuzzling and eliciting several needy mewls from Ben, Edward spread the lube over his fingers, before bringing his hand up to replace his mouth. "You said that you wanted me," Edward said softly. He made sure his lover's skin was slick and ready before slowly sinking a finger into his backside. "This is only the beginning." He pumped gently.

"Oh. Yes. More," Ben grumbled with his face pressed to the bed sheets then Edward added another finger stretching him more. "Mmm, it feels so good."

Edward smiled, while ripping open the small plastic package using his free hand and teeth. He was definitely willing to offer Ben more. Making quick work of the condom, Edward started to feel the impatience take a bite out of him. He wasn't one for rough sex, but right now if he could, he would just love pummel right into Ben. However, that was out of the question because it didn't work that way with his lover.

Sucking back his massive moan, he gently started to ease into the other man. Good gracious all that sensation. Relishing the tightness hugging him, Edward slowly filled the other man, while going deeper. Watching his lover's face distort and taking him to an unnamed place between extreme pleasure and pain, Ben groaned loudly accepting all of Edward. Making sure to be gently until Ben was relaxed, Edward started to pick up pace finally finding the way to quench his irritation and find some release. Ben groaned and panted loudly when his lover claimed his body.

Leaning over, he kissed Ben between his shoulder blades. "You feel so incredible," he gritted, losing himself in the moment. Tracing that strong body with his hands and having already brought Ben to the brink of release, Edward had barely grazed his lover's erection when he felt the incapacitating pulsation running though the other man's body.

"Yeah. Oh god, yeah. Oh, motherfucker. Oh!" Ben hissed into the sheets and his knuckles whitened when he fisted the comforter. Ben's body trembled, perspiration popping out on the small of his back, before he relaxed and sank to the bed. Having his lover toppled over the edge allowed Edward to seek his own climax.

A low intense groan reverberated in Edward's chest as he joined the other man seeing stars as he came.

After collapsing on the bed and breathing heavily, they both had kicked the comforter aside, just to snuggle into the sheets. "We really should go brush our teeth," Ben mumbled against Edward's chest.

"I'm entirely too lazy and far too comfortable to even consider it," Edward mouthed, relishing having Ben's warm body curled up to his. "You'll just have to deal with my bad breath."

Ben chuckled. "Feel better?"

"Like you wouldn't believe," Edward sighed lazily.

"You're really amazing. You know that?" Ben murmured wistfully. "You make me feel incredible."

Edward smiled. "You're not half bad yourself." He gently tapped Ben's still naked ass. "By the way, I thought we could go over to my parents' for lunch Sunday."

The dark haired man slowly lifted his head, taking in Edward with large brown eyes. "You want me to go with you to your parents?" There was a strange hope in Ben's tone.

"Yeah."

Ben reared up and kissed Edward chastely on the mouth. "I would love to meet your family," he said before his face spit with a toothy grin.

Edward smiled forcing Ben's head back down on his chest again, so they could snuggle. "Night, honey," he whispered, using that term of endearment for the first time.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Sooooo… how did I do with the boy boy smut?**

**Thanks to those of you who comments and a few that added me to your alerts. Sorry I didn't answer today, I normally do.**

**Kissing the feet of Chartwilightmon for pre-reading and Dazzled Eyes22 for beta'ing. I owe you big.**

**Tomorrow… tomorrow we are back with Bella. Laters…**


	6. Day 3, Thursday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyer personally let me borrow these wonderful people for a while…. I just wish.**

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**Day 3:**

**Thursday**

**Bella**

Coming back to the office, Bella set about packing envelopes again. It was a heinously boring job, but there was only one way of getting it done and that was to trudge right through it.

Angela would be back soon with their giant iced coffees. It was nice to have stepped out for dinner, basically getting replenished after a full day's work before putting in a few more hours at night. Glancing to her left, the light was still on in Edward's office. The space was empty and as far as she knew, he had left hours ago. Frowning, she got up to switch the light off because apparently Edward hated wasting energy. Not that she knew much about him because he had been just about as warm as an iceberg to her all day. It didn't matter, she told herself, because she had gotten a good job and was making a friend in Angela. That was what mattered.

Stepping into his office, Bella was hardly able to conjure up an apology after spotting the two men. It had taken a few seconds for her to get her bearings, but mainly she was stunned into silence. Her boss had a slightly shorter man pinned against a wall behind the door. Edward was crowding the man with his fingers locked hungrily around fistfuls of dark brown hair. The dark hued man's hands had traveled under Edward's untucked shirt. Their kiss was passionate, open-mouthed and wet. One of them groaned the moment before they both spotted her and yelped in surprise.

"Please forgive me, Mr. Cullen. I er… I thought you had left for the day," Bella stuttered, while averting her eyes. "I only wanted to turn your lights off. I'm so sorry."

Edward stepped back, while drawing his thumb over his lower lip and looking back and forth. "Uh, Isabella, this is Ben, he, uhm, he… works upstairs." Her boss' green gaze was somewhat amused, yet flustered.

Unable to help herself, Bella stared at the dark haired man that her boss had been lip locking with just a few moments ago. He was not as show-stoppingly gorgeous as Edward, but definitely quite the looker.

"I didn't mean to interrupt. I'm so sorry. Please excuse me." Bella shuffled out of the office, just as the elevator opened and Angela emerged holding two large iced coffees.

Bella sat down and started into the wall until she got her breathing under control.

"Here you go." Angela held out the cup, having insisted that she had to make the coffee run today.

"Thanks." Bella set it aside, while still picking up on the male voices from Edward's office. Angela took a huge draw of the coffee.

"You know, I totally forgot about these, but seeing you get one of these bad boys yesterday…" Angela jostled the container, "I just had to have one now. They're delicious."

"Yeah."

"You're going all monosyllabic on me, Bella. I'm sorry I'm working you so hard, but it's only until tomorrow. Next week, it's back to normal. I really wouldn't have made it through this week without you." Angela smiled kindly, before looking at Edward's office. "Oh, I thought he left."

"Hmm," Bella murmured, while trying to escape the image of Edward and the other man. The memory had a strange sting to it.

"Oh, Ben's here too, I see." Angela chatted, while bending her head and catching the straw between her teeth.

"You know him?"

"Yeah, he's Edward's… boyfriend, I guess. I'm not sure how long they've dated. He's been here a few times, but I think it's getting more serious. He's really cute, but as you know, I got my own Ben," Angela prattled. "You okay, Bella? You're looking kind of pale."

"Fine," she muttered, not truly knowing if she was okay. She hardly ever expected to have a shot with Edward and would never in a million years act on her fascination, but still her heart was a little less eager knowing that Edward wouldn't look her way. Perhaps that was why he was so cold towards her.

"Does it… does it bother you that he's gay?" Angela looked almost appalled.

"No. No, it's nothing like that. I just didn't know." Bella finally looked away from the wall.

"I know. He hides it well. Not that he's trying to hide it or anything, he's just… private, I guess." Angela shrugged.

Private, what Bella had seen was definitely meant to be private.

At that moment, a door shut and the presence of two more people was definitely tangible in the air. "We're leaving." Edward's soothing voice almost coated Bella's skin with those tongue like flames again. However, his tongue wasn't going anywhere near her. She blushed at the thought. "You two still okay to make the deadline tomorrow?" he asked.

"We're okay. No worries. Have a great evening," Angela said pleasantly. Bella couldn't help, but notice that Edward's shirt had been neatly tucked into his pants again.

"You, too," the dark haired man answered. Peering up, Bella met his eyes. They were soft, wide and brown and looking almost concerned. Her mouth curled at the corners with a very small smile before she had to look away again.

"Goodnight, Isabella." Edward murmured, offering a weak smile.

"Goodnight, Mr. Cullen." Through her lashes, she followed the two men heading for the elevator. They talked and smiled animatedly, while looking pretty happy.

"What do you say to two more hours and then we head home?" Angela asked.

"Sure," Bella answered.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Dun, dun, dun… Bella got an eyeful. What do you think?**

**Thank you so much for supporting me venturing into boy boy territory. It was fun to try. Besides that, I'm happy to see I have a few loyal commenteers. (Spelling, *shrugs*) I would love for more of you to join.**

**As always, thanks to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for all they do for me when I just end up nagging them.**

**Tomorrow… Edward dearest is back**


	7. Day 3, Thursday, Edward

**Thank you Stephenie, I'll hand them back to you… at some point.**

**Okay, what is with you and threesomes? Shame on you… okay no, it's nice to let your imagination run free. I do… **

**Just to make sure there is no misunderstanding. Ben doesn't work for Edward, but he works for Aro on the floor upstairs.**

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**Day 3:**

**Thursday**

**Edward**

"Oops," Ben snickered, while running his hands through his hair again. "I guess that we need to stop fraternizing at your office. We scared the bejeezus out of her."

Edward smiled weakly. "Perhaps." It felt strange to have that brown eyes girl look so startled when she saw them. It irked him to no end.

"You okay, baby?" Ben asked kindly.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Edward muttered, while feeling somewhat distracted.

"No, you're not. Come on. Let's go back to my place. We can just watch a movie and do nothing tonight. Okay?"

"That sounds nice actually," Edward acquiesced. It was exactly what he needed. It never bothered him that Angela knew about is sexual orientation, so why did it irritate him that Isabella had witnessed it? Besides they were only kissing, it was hardly a criminal action.

Edward had been ordered to soak in Ben's tub because he had been so wound up today as well as yesterday. Edward had submerged himself in the almost scalding water, while sucking in the relief. All that wound up tension began seeping from his body. Right now, he had no worries.

"Hey gorgeous. Have you fallen asleep?" Ben's voice was low and sultry.

"Almost," Edward hummed with his head resting at porcelain edge.

"The food will be ready in a few minutes." There was a gentle pressure against Edward's lips and then the roughness of his lover's scruffy chin to his. "You know. You are a very beautiful man."

Edward smiled into the kiss, already feeling arousal stir at the base of his spine. He opened his eyes to see the other man sitting on the lip of the tub. He couldn't help, but take his lover's hand and bring it down under the surface to feel his vastly growing erection. Ben coiled his fingers around Edward's hard sex, stroking it expertly a few times. Edward groaned in the back of this throat.

"However, I remember someone telling me that all good things come to those who wait," Ben teased, pulling his hand out of the water. "I made us some nachos, so let's go eat. I'm hungry."

"So am I," Edward countered tartly, already missing the feel of his lover's hand. It wouldn't have taken long at all.

After their minor food fest, Edward settled on the couch, wearing only Ben's robe. The movie was a drag. It was far more interesting to feel every hard and narrow curve of Ben's body as he lay against him. It was either that or to simply go to sleep. Right now, Edward preferred the former.

He was so focused on his thoughts that he didn't even notice Ben had already disentangled the cord from the robe and pushed it aside. What brought Edward out of his reverie was the warm wonderful suction suddenly enveloping him below his waist. His hands automatically weaved into Ben's hair when he deep throated him.

"I'm not going to last long if you keep doing that." Edward's words were garbled. He sat back, while relishing the look of his dick disappearing into Ben's mouth. His eyes closed, absorbing the sensation to the max.

The sound of Edward's groaning filled the room. The intense tingling shooting up his spine threatened a crescendo just on the horizon. Ben's lips were working against Edward with increasing urgency. "If you don't want me to come in your mouth, you better fucking move." Edward managed through his gritted teeth. Ben didn't pull back. He never did, but Edward always warned him.

Letting out a massive moan, Edward found the release that he needed. The relaxation of his muscles and the adrenaline rushing through his body, easing the tension were a godsend. Peeling his eyes open, Edward saw Ben carefully running his tongue over his glistening head and catching every last drop Edward spilled before he swallowed.

Crawling up Edward's body, Ben lay down, while slinging his leg over the other man. "You really are much too good to me," Edward said. The way that Ben's body was already relaxed, Edward knew that he didn't expect anything in return. "Here I am so bloody stuck in my own head, and yet you choose to spoil me."

Ben hummed with his head leaning on Edward's shoulder. "I like spoiling you." Ben craned his face up and kissed Edward gently on his lips. Edward awkwardly wiggled his way lower on the couch, so they were facing each other all tangled together. Ben laughed, while hanging on to Edward so he wouldn't find his ass on the hardwood floor.

Pensively, Edward ran his thumb over Ben's dark brow. "You're so kind and so generous." Edward leaned over, returning the kiss chastely. The moment seemed sacred and so potent to say what this man deserved to hear. However, the words couldn't get past his tongue.

Looking into Ben's deep brown eyes, Edward did speak, but probably not what the other man deserved to hear. "Let's go to bed," was what Edward chose to say.

Laying awake half the night, listening to Ben's quiet breathing and feeling his chest rise and fall with each breath as he held him, Edward couldn't help wonder why he had chosen to be silent. All the circumstances between them had been so right, but still… not enough to say what should have been said.

Edward closed his eyes and saw brown eyes, just not Ben's brown eyes.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Now… I hope you have a little faith in me. Many of you are wondering how things will change. I know how it happens and I will show you… soon. I loved reading your comments and insight. It makes it worthwhile posting.**

**Thanks to Chartwilightmom and her killer heels… they made me freaking line dance in mine yesterday. I have two words for that… Not happening. **

**Dazzled Eyes22, I'm running out of ways to thank you.**

**Lastly, I want to thank Malin for her undying support. Now, get yourself a profile here on FF.**


	8. Day 4, Friday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyer owns – I do not.**

ooooooOOOOooooo

**Day 4:**

**Friday**

**Bella**

"Bekka Swan?"

"Bella," she amended, while flying completely on autopilot and battling that time moving so damn fast. The day was turning out to be a nightmare. Everything was almost done, just the last leaflet with crucial information that needed to be packed in with the rest of the envelopes. That was when the mean machine had decided to hiccup and then completely crash. It was Friday and all the packages were supposed to leave by 4 pm sharp. It was already eleven in the morning.

"Sorry, Bella. I'm Jessica Stanley. You called with a problem with your copier?"

Bella finally looked up to find a girl with a bright smile and curly brown hair. "Yes, I called." Immediately, she was out of her chair and leading the technician to the copy room. Papers were littered everywhere from Bella yanking at the machine and pulling out compartments trying to persuade the mean machine to work again. It had all been to no avail.

Bella had successfully been able to hide it from Angela so far. She didn't ask anyone, instead she just called for help wanting to fix the problem by herself. Besides, Angela was under enough stress and stuck in a caffeine driven haze as it was.

"Here it is," Bella said, when the short girl put her computer bag down. Jessica took a sturdy look, before pressing buttons expertly on the touch screen. Then she ducked down and pulled out several compartments to check on the status of… things.

"I think the problem is in the software," Jessica said, smiling like that was a good thing.

"Okay," Bella answered, pretending to understand. Though, only one thing was on her mind. "So when will this run again?"

"I will need about an hour and a half," the technician assessed.

Bella had to hide her faltering smile. She had opted for half an hour… tops. This was not good. She clearly felt the stress pumping in her veins. "Can I get you some coffee or water?"

"Gee, thanks. Coffee, please. Just black," Jessica answered, while smiling hugely before ducking into her bag pulling out her computer. Bella watched frantically as the computer was rigged to the printer. This looked serious. With what she had learned, she couldn't just send the leaflet somewhere because then the color wouldn't match the layouts that had already been done.

Coffee… she reminded herself.

Opting to avoid wasting time making a run to the coffee shop, Bella hoped the sewer spill filter coffee everybody else drank would be okay.

Efficiently avoiding Angela for the better part of an hour, Bella often ended up hovering over Jessica, who was fiddling with the printer and slowly making it complacent again. At least now, it was spitting out some prints, whereas earlier, it was completely on lockdown.

As she watched the coffee spill over and some of the contents landing on the pristine white sleeve of Edward's shirt, Bella never thought getting another cup of coffee for the nice girl talented enough to fix Bella's lifeline would cause so much trouble. If Edward hadn't hated her before, she was sure that she had accomplished now.

Bella quickly began throwing apologies left and right, while trying to wipe his shirtsleeve with her hand in sheer panic. That didn't seem to lighten his mood at all.

So for the last twenty minutes or so, she had been hiding out in the copy room with Jessica in order to avoid both Angela and Edward. To say that she was bubbly and cheerful was a bit of an understatement. She was so chatty and when Bella left the copy room to start the last set of prints, she basically knew Jessica's entire life's story… accept from one crucial fact.

"All done," Jessica said, while brushing her hands.

"Gosh, you really are a life saver."

Jessica smiled broadly, while hefting a wayward chunk of hair behind her ear. "I know. Lucky me. The last two hundred prints should be done in…" She leaned over Bella's chair, feeling her curly hair falling on Bella's shoulder. "Ten seconds." She paused for dramatics. "Aaaaaand now, they're done," Jessica said as the pop-up window on Bella's screen closed.

Jessica pursed her lips. "Bella?" she hesitated. "I normally never do this," she lowered her voice. "Are you seeing anyone?" Bella glanced over the rim of her iced coffee cup. Angela had left at her desk probably having been in need of another double shot.

Bella frowned at the rather personal question. "Er… no."

"Would you like to go out?" Jessica's voice was sweet and confident. It took a moment before all the chips fell into place. Bella looked behind her like Jessica had to be asking someone else. There was no one. Even a comical image of Bella's alter ego was staring over her shoulder.

"Who, me?" Bella then asked.

"Yeah, you."

"I need to get this straight." Bella's heart had suddenly started to do a frantic dance in her chest. Carefully, she left her iced coffee on the table. "You mean like on a… date?"

Jessica laughed and her eyes creasing at the corners. She suddenly looked so carefree. "Yeah, a date. I have these really great tickets to Tina Fey tomorrow night. I'd like to take you, if you're free," she said like it was the most natural thing in the world.

Bella blinked rapidly trying to get her bearings. "Jessica… I'm not gay."

Her brows shot up. "Are you sure?"

Pretty much. "Yeah, I mean… I don't date girls." Did she? Bella couldn't help, but wonder. Could she say that she didn't date girls when she'd never even been on a date?

"I could have sworn… my gaydar is totally picking up on you." Jessica smiled, while still looking charming, self-assured and truly not bothered. "I mean all the crowding and the chatting me up. I just thought…"

Bella had to smile. She didn't mean to crowd Jessica. She had just been hiding out and the chatting, well, that was Jessica's own doing. Besides her, that alter ego was now tapping her foot and glaring at Bella. _Yeah, break your promise and stay your old boring self. Told you you couldn't do it. _

Bella remembered the pledge she made to herself Tuesday morning when moping over lost chances. That day, she had taken a chance and it had paid off. So being asked on a first date, did it really matter if it was a man or a woman? Bella made a quick decision.

"I would love to go," she answered, while trying not to bite her lip nervously.

Jessica's mouth popped open. Then, she narrowed her eyes. "But you just said…"

"Forget what I said. I changed my mind," Bella countered quickly, peripherally catching a glimpse of a really irritated looking Edward pacing his office and pinching the bridge of his nose.

What was with L.A. and all the gays? Perhaps, it was some sort of club. If it was, then she definitely didn't want to be locked out in the cold. She liked this sunny side, both literally and metaphorically. As her new and more noticeable self, she was aiming to be a gold member of the club… whatever it was.

Jessica smiled, looking earnestly pleased. "Listen, Bella. I'll leave this up to you. We'll go out tomorrow, but you decide if it will be a real date or just a couple of girlfriends going out. Text me with what you decide and I'll figure out if I'm wearing my hot jeans or not."

"Deal," Bella agreed, taking Jessica's number before she left. Once more, Bella took a chance.

Angela slumped in her seat, while washing down the last of yet another coffee. "Are the final prints done?" Her voice sounded so tired and her hair wasn't as neat today as usually.

"Yeah, just hot from the printer." Bella stood, going to retrieve them. Crisis averted.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Bella, Bella, Bella… that's all I'm going to say.**

**Sorry I didn't respond to comments today, family stuff.**

**Ever thankful to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22.**

**Laters.**


	9. Day 4, Friday, Edward

**I pretend to Stephenie Meyer, but I am not.**

**Today you get to meet Alice and see Edward more as a family man.**

**Enjoy.**

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**Day 4:**

**Friday**

**Edward**

Standing inconspicuously in the corner of the crowded gym, where the disco ball slowly cast reflections out into the room, this was so not how Edward imagined spending his evening.

"Look, I'm really sorry, Ben. I swear it was just thrust on me at the last moment."

Ben laughed over the phone. "Edward, it's fine. Try to enjoy it the best that you can and don't sweat it."

"I hate ditching you like this," Edward complained again, preferring to spend the night with Ben rather than here.

"You're not ditching me. You have your reasons and it's a very noble reason I might add, so I understand. Now, be a big boy and go do your job."

Edward laughed, seriously considering a snarky comeback, but chose not to. "Thanks, Ben. I owe you. Just know I would much rather be with you."

"Me too, honey. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah." Hanging up, Edward stepped away from the quiet corner into the blaring disco music and all the noisy kids.

The reason he got coerced into this was a little bleak right now. In the midst of his irritation over his ruined shirt, Edward had somehow let his father persuade him to chaperone at his baby sister's high school dance. Carlisle had been called into emergency surgery and his mother had come down with the flu. That left Edward to mind his family business for the night.

Alice had thought it was the bomb that Edward would be here instead of their father. It made her cooler by association. "Oh, come on Eddie, pleeeaaase," she whined.

"Absolutely not! You can't borrow my place for an after party. It's not happening, Alice," Edward said when he was crowded by his just sixteen year old baby sister and a bunch of her lash batting friends.

"Oh my god, do you know how cool it would be? We won't break anything and we won't drink, I swear."

"Are you kidding me, Alice? Even thinking about drinking, you're barely sixteen."

"I have been sixteen for a month!" she literally stomped her foot. Edward had to bite his lip not to laugh. "Oh my god, don't laugh at me," she muttered tartly, knowing she had to forfeit her plan… and in front of her oh so hopeful friends.

Edward put his arm around her shoulder lowering his head to the tiny girl and whispering in her ear. "You've been looking forward to this dance for a month, so please don't waste it picking a fight with me over something you're not going to win. Unlike many of your friends you actually have a date, so why don't you enjoy that instead because right now he is positively glaring at me." Edward snickered, while laying it on a bit thick.

"Really?" Alice beamed. "Oh, I hope he likes me. Oh my god, he's so totally cute."

"Do I get to meet him?" Edward asked when some of the girls dispersed.

"Oh my god, yeah. He's from Texas and has this really cute accent." Alice prattled like she was jacked up on Ritalin. "Oh, that totally reminds me. Mom said your boyfriend is coming for lunch on Sunday? Is that true?"

That brought the attention back from the teenagers like a whiplash. Edward hesitated, though his enthusiastic sister was oblivious. "Yeah, he's coming."

"I bet he's cute. Oh my god, no. I bet he's totally hot."

"Alice," Edward sighed, feeling somewhat uncomfortable with her being so… verbal.

"Is he?" she beamed up at him.

Edward rolled his eyes, knowing she wouldn't quit until he surrendered. "Yeah, he's not too shabby." In Edward's opinion, that didn't really do Ben justice, but fleshing this out with his younger sister by twelve years that he actually did think that his… boyfriend was hot was so not happening. "Now, stop stalling and go dance with your date. I'll meet him later." Edward bent down and kissed Alice cheek, before she scurried off with her posse in tow.

While Edward was chatted up by a few of the soccer moms hovering, the evening seemed to pass pretty painlessly. It wasn't that today was a bad day; he was still just so tense. All day, he had tried to locate the source of the tension, but all he could sum it up to was his new employee, Isabella Swan. She had been so charming when she in all her klutzy glory had tipped over half a cup of coffee on his shirtsleeve. It wasn't the stain as such that had flustered him. It was her small hands frantically trying to salvage his shirt. Her touch had felt unexplainably… nice. The light brushes of her dainty fingers, the startled look in her deep brown eyes and the furrows in her porcelain colored face had him enraptured. She had looked so… adorable. That was what irked him. He didn't understand it.

Pulling himself out of his thought spiral, he swept the dance floor looking for his sister. On the outskirts of the floor, her hands were up and around the neck of her date. They were staring at each other and not in some gooey kind of way, but like they were so curious to each other. Edward quickly discovered why.

The boy jerkily lowered his head, while carefully testing how Alice would react. She smiled her charismatic face splitting grin, nodded and then they kissed. A sweet gentle kiss. A part of Edward wanted to make sure his sister was safe by basically plowing over there, yanking the boy away, but in the back of his mind, he knew this was probably his sister's first kiss and he would be a moron to ruin that moment for Alice… and probably never forgiven for it.

That thought sobered him up. Edward chose to stay where he was, so he could spy discreetly, but still watch that the boy's hands stayed where they were, on the small of her back.

oooooOOOOooooo

**That was it for today… Any thoughts?**

**Thank you for all of you reviews and alerts. They make me all giddy.**

**Thank you to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22. You both know what you do for me.**

**Tomorrow… Bella has a date.**


	10. Day 5, Saturday, Bella

**I simply love Stephenie Meyers toys, but I only have them on loan.**

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**Day 5:**

**Saturday**

**Bella**

Having texted Jessica with her decision, Bella was all sorts of anxious. What would Jessica read into the two different scenarios that she had thrown into the air? What would she take from Bella's response?

Having very few options clothes-wise, Bella decided not to over think anything and just leave everything up to chance and go with the flow of what felt right. She wore her best pair of jeans, tight top and her favored tailored jacket with cropped sleeves. This attire would never have worked in Forks, but in L.A., it was an entirely different story. So, she let her hair hang loose for the first time this week and only teased it lightly with a curling iron.

Waiting in front of her apartment complex, Bella was enjoying a moment of quiet and just soaked up the sun.

"Hey," Jessica chirped, smiling broadly when she arrived a few minutes later.

Bella trusted her personality makeover and went with whatever popped into her head. "I'm glad it's the hot jeans. I like those." However, Bella couldn't help the heavy palpitation in her chest, while flirting so openly.

Jessica snickered. "You look pretty," she appreciated, giving Bella a once-over. "You ready to go?"

"Absolutely."

On the way to the venue, Jessica chatted about how she was really into stand-up comedy and mostly went to a small bar around the corner that had amateur shows every Wednesday and Saturday, but she would never have the guts to go up on stage herself.

It turned out that this date thing wasn't a bad choice at all. It was pretty effortless to be around Jessica. She supplied most of the conversation, but always listened intently when Bella shared some of her personal stories.

Tina Fey's routine left Bella with mixed feelings. At times, she found herself laughing so hard she had to hold her stomach and her cheeks were cramping. Other times, she was teetering on the brink of being appalled with how crude she got. Basically nothing was sacred.

During one of her hysterical fits of laughter, Jessica's hand landed on Bella's lower arm. Trying it on for size, Bella flipped her hand letting her palm meet Jessica's twining their fingers together.

It felt okay.

Jessica stopped laughing and glanced at Bella through her lashes. Then slowly, she cocked brow and a small smile curling at the corners of her mouth. Keeping a hold of Jessica's hand, Bella turned her attention back to the show again.

Walking outside of the concert hall, they were still smiling remembering the rude jokes and funny comebacks. The conversation was still effortless as Jessica excused herself to go to the powder room for a moment.

Waiting, Bella felt uncomfortable for a moment. She began running her hands over her bare arms when the small hairs stood at attention. She felt almost monitored for a brief second. She idly pushed the thought aside. Peering down, her hand was warm from holding Jessica's. So far everything went off without a glitch and Bella had a lot of fun.

Returning, Jessica picked up where they left off and twined her fingers into Bella's again. They smiled at each other. Standing just a little bit closer than a friend would, Jessica hefted a section of Bella's long tresses behind her ear. "You have really pretty hair… I like very long hair," Jessica said quietly.

Bella blushed looking down. "Thank you."

Jessica put her index finger under Bella's chin bringing her face back up again. She brushed her thumb over Bella's cheekbone. "We're on a date, but tell me if you're uncomfortable."

"I'm not uncomfortable. Not at all," Bella admitted, peering though her lashes at the woman's lovely blue eyes.

"Let's go have something to eat. I know this really great Mexican restaurant, not far from my place… which incidentally is not far from yours. I completely forgot to mention that."

"Really? How far?" With that, the conversation picked right up again.

Back at Jessica's apartment, Bella had accepted a quick drink before going home. She stood in the middle of the room staring out the window of Jessica's view of the courtyard. After taking a careful sip, Bella spoke. "I had a really good time."

"Yeah?" Jessica smiled, looking truly pleased. "I mean the show was great."

"It was."

Jessica moved closer, carefully watching if it was okay. She did that same move again, slowly dragging a chunk of Bella's hair behind her ear. "I'm glad to hear that." Bella didn't move an inch when Jessica lifted her face and gently pressed her lips to Bella's. She only closed her eyes, going with her gut feeling. This was okay.

This was nothing like her first unofficial kiss that had ended in mortification. To this day and in painful detail, Bella clearly remembered kissing her best friend Jacob Black when she was eighteen. The image of him taking a huge step back, holding both his hands up and looking shell shocked still made her cringe. _'Whoa, we're only friends, Bella'._

Kissing Jessica now, it felt nothing like that. Her lips were soft, very soft in fact as the women gently fused their mouths against each other. They didn't stop. Bella didn't want to stop as their hands moved into hair and lips parted.

From what little experience she did have, Jessica Stanley was definitely a great kisser - very tender and sweet tasting.

However, Bella should feel this all the way into her gut, right? Where was the tingling sensation? Where were the butterflies in her stomach? She always imagined flapping and humming when kissing someone for the first time. That was when she realized she viewed this more as a science project than anything else. Immediately thinking about Edward, those small butterflies were suddenly fluttering around in her stomach, but her lips and tongue swirling with a different person. Bella knew with absolute certainty that Jessica deserved more. She deserved someone who had the tingling sensation in her body and felt the butterflies in her stomach the first time they kissed.

Pulling back, it was clear from Jessica's look that she knew the truth. "You're not into this, are you?" she asked.

"No. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to lead you on or anything like that."

"Oh, sweetie. You didn't. While figuring out who you are, you need to kiss a few frogs to find your prince… or princesses in my case." She smiled warmly, while her eyes were full of understanding.

"Jess. If I did like girls as a partner, I would definitely date you. For what it's worth, I think you're quite a catch."

Jessica's face positively lit up half of Los Angeles.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Sooooo, what are you thinking?**

**Thank you for all your comments and alerts. I read them with huge interest. **

**Thank you to chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22.**

**Tomorrow is yet another day.**


	11. Day 5, Saturday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer owns, I just wish I did.**

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**Day 5:**

**Saturday**

**Edward**

Staring at her, Edward was positively disarmed. Today, he hadn't been able to escape the tension flooding his body at all. And right now, it just skyrocketed.

Spending hours at the piano in Studio B, Edward had been pouring everything he had over the keys, and playing angry aggressive pieces did nothing to alleviate his confusion and frustration. The dream of brown eyes had been back last night. Waking in a cold sweat, he had searched for Ben in the bed only to remember that they weren't spending the night together. Edward could easily have texted his lover and asked to come over, but he hadn't done that.

The crowd milled past him now, but all he saw was the small woman looking nothing like she did in the office. Waiting for Ben to finish mingling, Edward just ogled her.

So beautiful.

She was entirely striking.

So far, he hadn't seen her hair loose and that made all the difference. It was much longer than he expected, waving softly and hypnotically past the middle of her back. She fidgeted, while looking around her like she was searching for something.

Perhaps, she could feel him staring.

Focusing solely on Isabella, he didn't notice the other woman until foreign fingers traveled through Bella's hair. Bella didn't pull back at all, but only nodded briefly. A wave irritation coated his chest, trapping the air in his lungs at the hand that moved to caress Bella's flawless porcelain skin. The woman touched Bella's cheek.

In the span of a second, the irritation seemed to disperse when he realized the reason behind the other woman's touch. Seeing it, he understood that it was exactly how Ben would touch him. It was how the pads of Ben's fingers would play over his cheek. The motion would happen with the same exact intent and reverence.

So Isabella had secrets that Edward himself knew very well.

Perhaps, that was why he felt the unexplainable connection with her. Maybe that irritation he felt every time he saw her was not because she was a threat, but because she was a friend. She understood him because Isabella Swan was just as gay as he was.

The mood in the car on the ride home seemed to grow thick like mud. Edward couldn't help, but gently place his hand on Ben's thigh giving it a light squeeze. Ben's right hand left the steering wheel briefly stroking Edward's hand in affirmation. The touch rolled over Edward's skin like warm chocolate, so rich and pungent in flavor.

With his eyes open to what his new employee meant to him, the world suddenly seemed so simple again. Right now he could breathe unhindered like he used to.

In the foyer, Edward stepped up behind Ben. Gently, he pulled his lover's shirt free of his pants. "You… You're…" Edward lost his words, though there were so many things he wanted to say. He started opening buttons all the way down his lover's shirt. He dragged his palms over the other man's pecs, while placing wet kisses at the column of his throat. "I want to spoil you. You deserve to be treated and I want to make you feel really good," Edward murmured sincerely. When he couldn't seem to get the words out and he couldn't say what was on his mind, then perhaps his body could speak for him.

Ben had already leaned his face to Edward's, while welcoming his hands and mouth. "I'd like that," Ben sighed.

Hot, wet, and longing kisses were shared as they stumbled all the way to the bedroom. Their mouths never broke connection. The heat was already radiating of Ben's body in waves, but Edward was only getting started.

Suddenly feeling at ease again, it was simple for Edward to completely lose himself in the moment. All that mattered right now was pleasing Ben and Edward was everywhere on his lover's skin. He teased pressure points, while brining sinuous pleasure as Ben started to come apart at the seams.

Reaching for the condom and the lube, Ben knew the promise and closed his eyes for a moment. A shiver of excitement ran over his skin when he was about to roll over facing away, but Edward stopped him.

"Not that way." Edward leaned down, kissing Ben deeply and unhurriedly. "I want to see you today." He wanted the intense intimacy, the heart and soul of their connection. Edward had already been everywhere with his mouth and hands by teasing, stroking and kneading. Ben's cheeks were flushed with arousal and his eyes were clouded with need. Letting Ben see him stroke himself a few times, Edward rolled on the condom.

Leaning over the other man, Edward noticed strands of moist hair flopping over Ben's forehead and the absolute look of adoration in his eyes. Gradually, he started penetrating, easing painstaking slow into the other man and relishing every second and every iota of sensation of them being joined.

The responding moan was guttural and utterly primal as Ben's face scrunched up with pleasure. "Oooohhh."

Placing a gentle kiss on Ben's mouth, Edward took his lover's hands that were placed over his head grasping the headboard. Bring them down, Edward twined their fingers together hard. "Hold on to me instead."

Nose to nose and eyes to eyes, they both completely lost themselves to the slow rhythm of Edward thrusting and Ben's answering groans. These precious moments meant everything. Making love to Ben so slowly and with all his heart, though he couldn't say the words, Edward was safe from the worry, safe from the questioning and mainly just sure of what and who he was.

oooooOOOOooooo

***Clears throat* Idyllic, huh?**

**Anyway, thanks for the comments, glad to see more of you joining in. So what did you think this time? Tell me, tell me, tell me.**

**Thanks to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for making it possible to post this story.**

**Recently I read a one shot that rocked my slash-loving world. It's call ****Come Hither**** and it's written by ****AnnaLund****. It's absolutely delectable. Check it out and leave her some love. **

**I'm on Twitter. Elvirina_Nelly**


	12. Day 6, Sunday, Bella

**Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer, no me.**

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**Day 6:**

**Sunday**

**Bella**

Sunday was created as a day of rest, but Bella didn't plan to rest. Putting on a pair of sensible shoes, she wanted to be outside. Having been cooped up in Forks under the near constant cover of clouds and rain made her realize how much she had missed the sun. So today, on this glorious day, where there wasn't a cloud in the sky, Bella wanted to finally look around her new city.

She had a whole itinerary planned. She wanted to see Rodeo drive. She wanted to walk along the stars on the sidewalk and see all the handprints and shoe marks on Hollywood Boulevard. She wanted to see the Hollywood sign. She wanted to go to Hard Rock Café to have lunch and lastly, she wanted to go to the beach and dip her toes in the ocean.

Knowing full well that she wouldn't make it though it all, she decided not to care and just start where ever. Most importantly, the old Bella would never in a million years have done this on her own, but the new Bella was excited and ready to face the world.

Moving to L.A. and taking a few chances made her realize that she was really okay. There was nothing to hide from and it was only up to her to create the life that she wanted to have.

Starting last night, she had been on her first date, perhaps not with a person that she ever expected, but she had a very successful and sweet first date. Sure, it probably wasn't going to go in the direction Jessica was hoping for, but Bella and Jessica had agreed to be friends. Besides getting to know Angela, Bella had made another friend. That was what mattered.

She had also been kissed. A real bona fide kiss. Sure Bella hadn't ever expected to kiss another woman, but it was a kiss and a nice one. It wasn't anything like Jacob's rebuff and that felt good to Bella.

So with grasping all of these opportunities now… only time could tell where that would leave her.

For now, she just wanted to enjoy the day and feel the sun on her skin.

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**A short chapter… probably the shortest of the story.**

**I'm sorry I didn't manage to answer to your comments today, but blame AnnaLund, she kept me busy editing though some juicy stuff for later… nuff said. Not answering doesn't mean I appreciate them any less. Please keep them coming.**

**Thank you to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for your help and support.**

**See you tomorrow.**


	13. Day 6, Sunday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer owns all twilight. I own the plot.**

**Ready for some lunch?**

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**Day 6:**

**Sunday**

**Edward**

"Anything I need to know before we go inside?" Ben asked, while placing his hand on Edward's thigh. They sat in the car parked in Edward's parents' driveway. After their night together, Edward was nothing but calm, well, unless counting the lunch with his parents.

"Uhm, not really. I don't think anyone is going to be rude or anything like that if that's what you're worried about."

Ben's hand moving to Edward's cheek was warm and affectionate. "Are you nervous, baby?"

"I would be lying if I said I wasn't." Edward took a deep breath, before leaning over and placing a gentle kiss on his lover's lips. "Let's get this show on the road."

Once inside, Edward remembered that he forgot to warn Ben about Alice. However, before he got the chance, the sixteen-year-old bundle of energy came barreling down the stairs. "You're here!" she screeched. She leaped off the stairs and jumped into Edward's arms. Good thing he caught the tiny girl.

"Hey, little sis." Edward said into her hair, while hugging her.

Alice placed a big pouty kiss on his lips, before she turned beaming to stare at Ben. "Oh my god, he's so hot, Edward. You totally lied," she gushed without a hint of shame.

Ben flushed slightly, Edward rolled his eyes. Again, Alice acted exactly like a sixteen-year-old girl should… sans brain-to-mouth filter.

Carlisle cleared his throat gently. "You must be Benjamin. I'm Carlisle, Edward's father. Welcome," he said politely extending his hand.

Edward's lover took it. "Mr. Cullen. Ben, please. Thank you for having me."

Carlisle nodded amiably. "I do believe my wife is around somewhere." He glanced around for Esme. "She's probably in the kitchen."

Edward placed his hand at Ben's back guiding him to the kitchen after he said hello to his father and received an appreciative smile.

"Oh my god, you guys are so cute," Alice beamed.

Edward cringed. It was now that the twelve year age difference and the _'Oh my gods'_ would start to get to him. He was nervous enough as it was.

"Oh dear, I'm so rude," Esme prattled of the moment they entered the kitchen. "It was either that or lunch would burn to a crisp. I do apologize. I figured the former was easier to make up for than the latter." She put down the heavy dish with the simmering roast she had just retrieved from the oven. She pulled off the oven mitts heading across the kitchen.

To Edward, it was easy to see his mother was somewhat overwhelmed, but he could also see her absolute determination to make an effort to achieve a nice day. Esme Cullen didn't do things halfway.

Esme hugged Edward first. "My only boy," she whispered thickly, before she kissed her cheek and quickly wiping the smudge from her lipstick away.

"Hi, Mom. Are you feeling better?"

"Pfft, it was nothing. I was just being a baby." Esme's glance traveled to the man standing beside her son. Edward cleared his throat, while regaining his focus.

"I'd like you to met Ben." The words _'my boyfriend'_ that Edward intended to follow never did.

"How lovely to meet you. I hope you're hungry," Esme trilled.

"Famished." Ben patted his stomach for effect.

Edward frowned. "Where's Rosalie?"

Carlisle lips thinned and then inconspicuously pointed to the ceiling. "Upstairs and sulking."

"What happened now?" Edward asked, smirking. Rosalie was a petulant teenager and absolutely stunning, but notorious for kicking up a storm.

"I caught her crawling in through her window at four thirty this morning… somewhat inebriated."

"So you grounded her?"

"Well, she was already grounded for getting caught smoking at the school with Emmett, so now she has chosen to 'lock' herself in her room," Carlisle answered, making quotation marks in the air. "If you go up there, you better wear some armor because she is in a foul mood. I took away her car, too."

"Hey, kiddo," Edward said, leaning against the jamb to the middle child's room. He stared at the missing door handle puzzled.

"Hey, Eddie," she chimed sadly. "First, he removes the lock, then the handle. It's so unfair. A woman needs her privacy," Rosalie muttered, seeing Edward's amusement.

Edward stepped over to her bed and began running his fingers over her long blond hair. "I wish I could be the middle man, but I guess I understand you both."

"Well, you're both guys and you don't get anything," she scoffed, tossing herself dramatically back on the bed. Edward leaned back, supporting his weight on his elbows.

"Well, perhaps you'd feel a little better if you had some lunch with the rest of us. Uh, Ben would like to meet you."

Rosalie grinned. "I thought Dad was kidding when he said you were bringing someone. I personally never thought you'd grow the balls to actually bring your _boyfriend_ home."

Edward's chest felt a little tight suddenly. "Well, I did. Now why don't you grow a pair and come downstairs and eat with the rest of us." He challenged his sister.

Rosalie smirked with her eyes twinkling.

Sitting down at the table, Rose was fuming and torturing her food while narrowing her eyes coldly at Carlisle every time he spoke. Carlisle mostly ignored her. Besides sporadic conversation, it was a little quiet perhaps a somewhat tensed.

"So, Ben, are you from L.A. originally?" Edward's mother asked, while taking a sip of her white wine.

"No, Mrs. Cullen," Ben answered and Edward's mother rolled her eyes.

"Please, I'm old enough as it is. Please call me Esme. Where are you from then?" she asked with interest.

"New York. Harlem to be exact," Ben answered, while dapping the corners of his mouth with the napkin.

"Was it rough growing up there? I'm sorry I don't mean to make assumptions."

"Please, it's fine. Sometimes it was, but it wasn't the neighborhood as much as… other circumstances," Ben answered politely. Edward gently placed his hand on Ben's thigh under the table and gave it a light squeeze.

Esme continued. "Do your parents still live there?"

Ben cleared his throat, probably not wanting to make everyone uncomfortable. "I suppose they do." Esme's eyes widened and Carlisle stopped eating. "I haven't really spoken to them since I was fifteen. Well, I call my mom on Christmas every year, but that's about it."

"Why don't you talk to your parents?" Alice asked bluntly. Only just turning sixteen, it was probably hard to understand such a situation.

"Alice!" her brother admonished.

Ben smiled gently. "It's okay, Edward." He turned to Alice his brown eyes were soft. "I chose to tell my parents that I was gay at that age. My father wouldn't accept it. My mother wouldn't stand up to him, so they kicked me out of the house… for good."

Across from Rosalie, Edward noticed her face soften when she stared at Ben. Possibly, a bit of perspective seeped into her brain. There were worse things than having your car taken away.

"Oh, sweet lord! You were only fifteen at the time? What did you do then?" Esme asked horrified, though she knew about struggling at that such a young age.

Under the table, the men threaded their fingers together. Edward was running his thumb soothingly over Ben's knuckles. "I'm an only child and have no family to speak of, so sometimes I crashed with friends, sometimes in shelters, sometimes… Mostly, I just tried to keep up in school because I wanted to graduate. I knew if I didn't… I would have no chance of ever making a life for myself. Then one day not long after I graduated, I happened to be at the right McDonalds at the right time on the right day because an agent from a modeling agency spotted me. Fairly quickly, I started booking jobs and making a living for myself. It wasn't much in the beginning. I managed to save enough to go to college and get myself a degree.

"So four years ago, I moved out here to start over and life has been kind to me ever since." Ben shrugged as if he could brush of such a difficult adolescence.

"Good for you, I say," Esme chimed in when she found her voice again.

"Oh my god, I knew you were a model," Alice gushed. As everyone started chuckling, the tension from the story of Ben's past dissolved. "Oh my god, you must have traveled all over the world then?"

"No, I didn't," Ben answered kindly. "It was primarily catalogue work. It's not the most coveted job, but it pays pretty well."

Ben gave Edward's hand a light squeeze.

"Oh my god, you are so holding hands, aren't you?" Alice trilled, basically ducking under the table to check. "That is so adorable," she squealed.

Ben leaned slightly to Edward's side, whispering. "Oh my god, she's so enthusiastic," he teased. Edward chuckled, feeling a bit like a Ken doll.

"Oh my god, I totally forgot to warn you about her," Edward shot back in a mock girly voice.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Anyone ready for dessert? Just kidding. **

**Tomorrow Bella's back and going to have a conversation with her moody boss…**

**Thank you for your thoughtful comments and insight to my story. I treasure every single review I get. **

**Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 you both know what you do for me, but thank you anyway.**

**Laters…**


	14. Day 7, Monday, Bella

**I'm just borrowing Stephenie Meyer's winning lottery ticket. I'm not sure I ever want to hand it back.**

**Some of you mentioned you missed Bella… well, ladies here she is.**

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**Day 7:**

**Monday**

**Bella**

Making the deadline on Friday, it was a relief that Monday was turning out to be a slow day. Sorting out all the junk that had been left around the office in their hurry last week, Bella spent the morning tidying up.

And for the first time ever, _Edward the Iceberg_ had inexplicably started to melt. This morning, he had made a point of smiling and greeting her kindly, while riding up in the elevator. It threw Bella for a loop, but the biggest loop of all was still to come.

"Isabella?" Edward's melodic voice sounded when he called her name from his office.

"Yes, Mr. Cullen," she answered and stepped over to the door.

"Edward, please. I know this is short notice, but my lunch meeting was cancelled, so I was wondering if you would mind stepping out and having a sandwich with me? I hate to eat alone."

Bella blinked spastically. Was it okay going to lunch with your boss like that? Angela had hinted that she should stay away from him, but could she say no to his request now? That was a no brainer. No, she couldn't.

"Okay… Edward." Jeez, her voice was so small.

Standing alone together in the elevator for the second time that day, it was like those tongues of fire started dragging heat across her skin again. Their proximity was polite, but Bella could undoubtedly feel his presence in the air. The tiny hairs on her arms stood at attention.

Edward chose a small sandwich shop around the corner where small tables with real linen were set outside in the warm sun. Bella couldn't help but tip her head back and greet the warmth for just a moment.

Edward cleared his throat, while setting a plate with a larger than life pastrami sandwich in front of her. They both dug in.

She noticed that Edward drew several deep breaths before he spoke. "I er… I lied about the lunch meeting being cancelled. I never had one. I apologize," he started bashfully. "The real reason I asked you to lunch is because I wanted to talk to you about last week."

Bella looked up from the bite she was taking, shocked. "Am I being fired? I'm so sorry about your shirt. I know I tend to be a bit clumsy, but it really was an accident," she ranted, while feeling a rush of adrenalin pumping through her veins. She really didn't want to lose her job.

"No, no." He laughed. "You did a great job last week. Angela is so pleased with you. It's actually not work related. I was thinking more about Thursday night when you… met Ben. I… er wanted to make sure that you aren't uncomfortable with the situation." He cleared his throat.

She felt her face start to heat. What could she say to that? _No_, it didn't bother her to see men kissing and being affectionate in general, but _yes_ it had bothered her and brought her to the point of tears knowing it was Edward who was kissing another man.

"I'm not uncomfortable with it at all," she managed to say, while keeping her voice steady. Wow, this was probably the best-delivered lie she ever uttered.

Edward smiled, while his eyes gleaming in the sunlight. Oh, that smile. It really did make her swoon and Bella needed to peel her eyes away to avoid ogling rudely.

"I figured as much," Edward said under his breath, while taking a bite of his sandwich.

Bella's brow shot up. "How so?"

"How so what?"

"How did you figure out that seeing you kissing… your boyfriend didn't make me uncomfortable?" She asked curiously.

Edward's mouth stretched into a cheeky grin. "I promise you that I didn't spy, but I happened to see you Saturday night leaving the Tina Fey show. I guess you could say that I figured out we both bat for our own team. If you're not out yet, you don't have to worry about any indiscretion on my part… But I thought I should mention it."

It took a moment for her to figure out what exactly he was getting at, but then it dawned on her like the sun breaking through the clouds. He had seen her with… Jessica. The very _gay_ Jessica.

"Oh," Bella gasped. "I'm not gay." She frowned, finding herself repeating that notion a lot lately.

Edward's eyes darkened and his mouth popped open. "But…excuse me if I'm being too blunt, you were on a date if I'm not mistaken."

Bella groaned, never thinking she actually had to explain this to anyone. "I, sort of, was on a date, but I'm not lesbian, not that I have a problem with that either. Jessica asked me out and I accepted. I don't know how to explain this, but it was kind of like a dare to myself."

Edward watched her, as his eyes grew darker, almost furious. "So you're not gay?"

Bella shook her head slowly, feeling the temperature around her plummet. Edward's lips narrowed into a hard uncompromising line.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Dun, dun, dun… and the truth comes crashing down.**

**Thank you ****to HopeStreet**** for taking the time to comment on every single chapter posted of this story. Also a big applause to ****AnnaLund****, whom I have discovered is a true inspiration when it comes to writing. To the rest of you thanks for commenting and adding me to you alerts. I respond… mostly.**

**As usual hugs and kisses to Chartwilightmom for Pre-reading and Dazzled Eyes22 for Betaing.**

**Tomorrow you get to hear exactly what happened to dear confused Edward.**


	15. Day 7, Monday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer created these wonderful people, I just try to make their day more interesting. **

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**Day 7:**

**Monday**

**Edward**

Extending an olive branch, Edward's entire life crashed down around him. Watching the girl with the porcelain skin deny the fact that had made Edward feel so safe again simply trashed his life. It was strange how those few words pulled the rug from under him. Now, the staggering reality was that he felt so vulnerable and insecure again, all in the matter of one helpless second.

The sun sparkling off her delicate pale skin on her neck made his heart thump in his chest. Remembering the other woman's fingers sliding along that long soft hair, he imagined it was his fingers coiling into the tresses.

How could he have been so wrong?

How could he have been so naïve?

Seeing her deep chocolate brown eyes brim with confusion, he was barely able to endure the rest of lunch with her while being polite. He felt betrayed by his own mind making it hard to speak after that. He was so angry at this frail looking girl who unknowingly was uprooting his entire world.

Torturing his running shoes and taking a long run, his mind was still hazy with a myriad of emotions that he couldn't really place or name. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw her face and he really didn't want to see her. He didn't want to acknowledge her at all. He had his life and it was a good life. It was a life he wanted and had built from his own preferences.

Even in college, his confusion had never been this intense. He had never felt this lost.

Isabella Swan simply made the ground he was standing on so unsteady it was hard to keep his footing. He didn't understand it. They hardly knew each other.

Probably for the first time ever, he ignored Ben's request asking if they should see each other. Not really making a conscious decision, Edward would just brush it off with the lame excuse of having fallen asleep on the couch after his run.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Poor, poor Edward… **

**Have you ladies ever experienced one simple fact that suddenly flipped your life upside down?**

**Thanks to Chartwilightmom for pre-reading, hope I wasn't a nuisance yesterday. Hugs to Dazzled Eyes22 for Betaing.**

**Well, I'm going back to nursing my hangover and I'll see you in the morning.**


	16. Day 8, Tuesday, Bella

**If I wrote Twilight, I would be floating around in a pool sipping cocktails, but obviously I'm not.**

**Yesterday FF Net was being a bitch, let's hope she does better today.**

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**Day 8:**

**Tuesday**

**Bella**

One step forward and two major steps backwards. That was putting it mildly. Edward had to be bipolar. There was no other explanation. His sudden mood swing at lunch yesterday left Bella an inch short of a whiplash.

He was impossible to read.

Using the morning, Bella tidied up both studios as they were needed for whenever rock stars decided to fall out of bed and get to work. The perpetually moody teenagers with the voices like angels once more occupied one studio, while a tall slender woman with flaming red hair and Cullen Music's other producer used the other to fine tuning a few songs.

Grabbing a print from the copy room, Bella was spectacularly aware the moment that she was no longer alone. Fear licked her skin or was it those tongues of fire again that just felt like ice this time? Her breath got caught in her throat as Edward towered over her and glowered with the most intense scrutiny she had ever been subjected to. She wondered if he was able to extract the thoughts from her mind because it sure felt like that.

"Do you… Do you need anything, Mr. Cullen?" Bella felt that it was safest to return to a formal tone again.

"I… I…" he stammered. His mouth stayed open, while his eyes ignited both fear and wonder in Bella. He didn't say anything else. Bella grasped another chance to be forward, considering she had a new personality now. So far, having taken risks had benefited her. Perhaps, it would again.

Opening her eyes wide, she looked him straight in the eye. "Why are you so mad at me?" Bella hated how her voice sounded like a wounded child's.

He blinked several times and then again. "I just don't understand," he murmured. His tone was the direct opposite of his burning gaze. It was soft, tender and nonetheless speculative. Before Bella had the chance to ask more questions, he left, leaving her in his wake. However, the presence of him still lingered in the room because she was nearly panting and kept at it for long moments.

All day long, they had a strange dance going. When he stepped one way, Bella stepped another. It wasn't synchronized at all, but a jerky reflex. A clumsy waltz performed by kids with no rhythm.

"Angela?" Bella asked cautiously, not really interested in digging for dirty details, but the tension was driving her up the wall.

Edward's assistant swiveled in her chair. "Yeah?"

"I was wondering, is Edward always in… this kind of mood?" She really didn't want to mention the pouty teenager routine, but that was mostly what it felt like. Though, it would be wrong to say that out loud.

Angela's eyes widened. "He's not normally moody, but he has bad days like the rest of us, I guess."

"Okay," Bella acquiesced, leaving the subject alone, but she was the only one.

"Were you thinking anything specific, Bella?" Angela's eyes were shrewdly on her.

"No. He just seems a bit cold. That's all." Bella looked down, wringing her fingers.

"Don't take it personally, but in the past my assistants have had the tendency to think she was the one to cure him of his gay _'disease'._" Angela paused to giggle while making quotation marks, "because they think he is so hot. Though Bella, when the last one quit a week ago, Edward promised me that he would stay away from whomever I decided to hire to avoid another _situation_ here at the office. He hates when women hit on him. He's not a bad guy. I think he is just doing what he promised me." Angela's face was nothing but earnest.

"I see," Bella answered, not sure what to feel. She didn't intend on ever acting on her schoolgirl crush, but knowing that looking at Edward the wrong way would cost her job, she vowed to keep a clear distance to the man that obviously didn't want her around.

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***Clears throat and ducks* Sorry ladies nothing warm and fussy this time either. Bear with me, please. Now what do you think?**

**Now thanks to Chartwilightmom for pre-reading and Dazzled Eyes22 for Betaing.**

**Thank you for all your wonderful comments, and I'm so sorry I didn't respond today. Please forgive me?**

**See you ladies in the morning I'm off for my beauty sleep… not that it helps.**


	17. Day 8, Tuesday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer owns, I play.**

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**Day 8:**

**Tuesday**

**Edward**

Waking up, his breath was ragged, his skin prickling with fear… or perhaps something else. Glancing around and swallowing thickly, Edward tried to calm his breathing. He realized he was halfway slumped off the couch in his living room.

Searching through the images of his dream, he didn't know whether to be horrified or seduced by them. Dragging his hands down his face, he drew a deep breath and sighed in relief.

There was nothing wrong, he told himself. It had only been a nightmare.

He closed his eyes once more and his dream started all over again. His fingers picked at the black ponytail holder, while carefully unwinding it from the knot it was holding. Watching the dark brown hair tumble down, he ran his fingers along the tresses that were oh so soft and had a vague smell of summer… strawberries.

Weaving his fingers into the softness, he was amazed at how good it all felt. How it all felt right. Bringing the tresses up to his nose, he inhaled deeply, while relishing the intoxicating and feminine scent.

Letting the dream go on, Edward let things happen. He didn't fight it when the pads of his extended fingers gently tickled the delicate and smooth skin of the jaw. He was so enamored with how fluent and flawless the porcelain membrane was. It was utterly perfect.

The chocolate brown of the eyes were smiling at him and beckoning him to come closer. And he did.

His lips pressed to the delicate mouth. It was exhilarating to say the least and it felt more than right, more like a calling. It was fate.

Slowly opening his eyes, Edward finally understood what was going on. He never had to deny this before, but since last Tuesday, he had fought with every bone of his body not to feel the connection that he did. Seeing it clearly, there was no fighting it, but only the path to come to terms with it. There was only one way to find out what was really going on.

He didn't want to be a fraud in his own life. He didn't want to betray people that trusted him. He didn't want to live trying to deny himself. Instead he needed to understand himself before he could move on.

His phone went off, vibrating and scurrying over the coffee table. Picking it up, he noticed the four unanswered calls from Ben.

He ran his hand over his face again before he answered.

"Hey," Edward said softly.

"Hey yourself. You're a hard one to get a hold of. You okay?" Ben asked.

Edward's heart constricted. "Yeah, I've had a few intense days at work. I'm sorry I didn't get back to you."

"Don't worry about it. You want me to come over?"

Edward closed his eyes, sensing the hope in Ben's voice. "Er, I was about to turn in. I'm not worth the bother tonight. I really need some sleep."

Ben chuckled. "Oh, honey, you're always worth the bother, but I get it. You need your beauty sleep."

"Something like that, yeah."

"We still on for tomorrow?"

"You bet. I'll see you tomorrow, Ben."

"Sleep tight and have sweet dreams."

Edward sighed hanging up. Sweet dreams were exactly what the crux of the problem was. The sweet dream he just had was very telling. He was suddenly morphed back eight years to a time where he spent every waking hour doubting himself. He knew what he needed to do to make this go away. It was what he had done all those years ago when the doubt had become too much. Back then, he had acted on his impulses and investigating it had led to an understanding of who he really was.

That only meant there was one thing to be done.

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**Soooo… what are we thinking? Show me some love, well I hope.**

**Thanks to Chartwilightmom for pre-reading and I think I scared her half to death last night. Sorry. Also my beta Dazzled Eyes22 needs applause. **

**Thank you so much for all if your reviews and kind thought. Keep 'em coming, ladies.**

**I'm on Twitter Elvirina_Nelly come find me.**


	18. Day 9, Wednesday, Bella

**Characters belongs to Stephenie Meyer. I own the plot.**

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**Day 9:**

**Wednesday **

**Bella**

The tempo at work was picking up again. Both Studios were full and Bella had to run errands more than once to satisfy the whim of several people. She was also booking tickets to events, answering questions about release dates, and lastly there was a heinously large portion of fan mail that had been brought to her attention that needed to be sorted out.

The day didn't drag in any way and Edward's mood seemed to have improved today. That was a relief. She didn't understand why, but having Edward glower at her like she was a pariah was making her feel like breaking down into tears.

Already at lunch, Edward had taken off. He had smiled at her, though his expression was positively somber. He looked like his neighbor had run over his dog.

"Are you about done here?" Angela asked kindly. She was never judgmental if a task seemed to take too long. She always wore a smile and was patient.

Bella gestured with the last stack of letters she was distributing to different bands. Working as an assistant's assistant in a music studio, she was becoming increasingly aware of how little she knew about the industry. Now, hand her a line of Wuthering Heights and she could probably name the page that it was printed on.

"Almost done. I really didn't think people wrote actual fan letters anymore."

Angela snickered. "I know, right. Well, if it helps some teenage girl get something of her chest, then by all means power to her." She paused. "I need some help dragging up the new shipment of supplies. The delivery guy dropped them of at the bay on the ground floor. I hate when they do that."

Bella smiled in sympathy, while sorting out the final letters. "All done." Taking the elevator downstairs, Angela was in her usual chatty mood.

"So what are you doing this weekend?"

"Nothing much. I took last Sunday to look around L.A., but I didn't get around to seeing all that I wanted. I was thinking about spending Saturday on the beach." Bella took a deep breath remembering this new and daring self. "You want to come?"

"Oh, I would love to, but unfortunately I can't. I'm going up to Joshua Tree this weekend with Ben." Angela suppressed a smile.

"What?" Bella asked curiously at her expression as they exited the elevator.

"Don't tell this to anyone, but we're trying to get pregnant. So basically, we are going on a baby making weekend." Angela grinned and Bella snickered in response. It was so nice having another person confide in her like this. It had to mean that Angela was a trusted friend, right?

"I would never dare leak this very delicate information. Have you been trying for long?"

"A couple of months, but my hopes are up that this will be the right time. It's so nice to get out of the city and just to get away and be alone with my boyfriend. Life tends to get so busy."

Bella agreed. The two weeks she had spent in L.A. had flown by in the blink of an eye, but to Bella, it was all exhilarating and a new beginning.

Getting back upstairs and casting a fleeting glance at Edward's office, Bella thought it seemed strange that he had left so early. So far that hadn't been like him and the sad face that he wore somehow put a little damper on Bella's good mood.

Though he might hate her, all she wanted was for him to be happy. She wanted to see that heartbreaking smile and twinkle in his eye that she had the luck of witnessing a few times. It was a strange paradox to wish happiness so deeply for a person who didn't particularly like her and probably found her to be a nuisance. Though she wanted him happy, it still meant that she was keeping her distance though.

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**Soooo another short chapter. Tomorrow will be longer when the reason for Edward's sober mood is disclosed.**

**As always thanks to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22.**

**I'm really enjoying your comments on what you think Edward is going to do and how Bella will respond. Just to let the cat out of the bag, none of you got it right so far. Any thoughts on today?**

**See you tomorrow.**


	19. Day 9, Wednesday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer makes a lot of money on this, I don't.**

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**Day 9:**

**Wednesday**

**Edward**

Knocking the door to Ben's place lightly, Edward's stomach was in absolute knots. He so didn't want to do this, but he really had to be fair to the man who had never been anything other than kind and attentive. Though he had taken the afternoon away from the office mainly to be away from Isabella, it hadn't helped calm his nerves at all.

"There's my handsome man," Ben trilled and opened the door wider.

Edward mustered a smile, though his heart was in his shoes. Taking in the smell of food and the mess in the kitchen, Edward could tell that Ben was busy cooking up an amazing meal. He knew his way around a kitchen.

"Come here. Taste this." Ben stirred the pot, before he held the wooden spoon to Edward's mouth and smiled. Edward took a careful taste of the scorching sauce.

"Delicious," Edward answered, trying to sound chipper. It wasn't working.

Ben took a curious look at Edward, before the timer on the oven went off. Hauling two perfectly cooked steaks out of the oven, he wiped his hand on the apron. Once more, their eyes met.

"Why don't I like the way you're looking at me?" Ben said carefully, while assessing his lover.

Edward looked down at his hands briefly and feeling sweat popping out on his palms. "Because I'm pretty sure you're not going to like what I have to say."

"Oh," he whispered, his mouth forming a perfect 'O'. Ben untied the apron, pulled it off and laid it on the counter. "So what are you going to say?"

"Uhm… I'm not sure how to say this really."

Ben's brown eyes suddenly brimmed with pools of tears. "It's that bad?" He quickly dashed the forming tears away.

"I need to break this off between us." Edward sighed as the silence stretched. He really didn't throw the sentiment _'it's not you, but me'_ out there, but it was the crux of his current problem. It was him, his confusion with a certain brunette.

"You're breaking up with me?"

Edward nodded apathetically. A river of quiet tears ran down Ben's cheeks. He wasn't normally the type to cry, but Ben wasn't one to hide his feelings either. Edward stepped forward and put his arms around Ben in hopes of comforting the other man, perhaps as a small band-aid to his sudden heartache.

Ben gripped Edward around his chest, hugging him tightly, and burrowing into his neck. He gave a quiet sob, before the damn broke. "Take it back. Please take it back, Edward. I'm so in love with you, but I didn't want to say anything so soon. I know we agreed to just keep it casual, but I've fallen for you hard." He fell silent against Edward, as sobs rocked his body. "Please take it back, just take it back," he whispered into Edward's arms.

"Oh, Ben," Edward mused, locking his fingers into the other man's hair and returning the desperate embrace. "I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you."

Ben pulled back, looking up at Edward with big wet eyes. "I don't understand. Everything has been going so well. This weekend… meeting your family? Us… in bed Saturday. What was that then? I just don't understand, Edward." Ben paused, trying to get his thoughts together. "Is there someone else?" he asked carefully, probably seeking some way to explain this.

Edward suddenly didn't know what to answer. Was there someone else?

Ben backed out of the embrace with his face clouding with betrayal. "Did you cheat? I know we didn't label anything, but still…"

Edward cupped Ben's face in his hands. "No. It's not like that. Nothing like that in fact," he answered sadly. "You're a wonderful man, I'm just… I'm just so confused. That's why I need to do this. I like you, I really do, but I can't let this go on and pretend that everything is fine. That wouldn't be fair to you. You're too good for that."

Ben put his hands over Edward's on his face. "What happened?" he expressed with concern. This was Ben in a nutshell. Instantly, he was genuinely concerned for his, now, former lover. His own grief instantly pushed to the background, along with the tears he brushed away.

"I shouldn't bother you with it."

"Oh, nonsense." He pulled one of Edward's palms to his mouth and kissed it. "Let's not waste the food. We can eat and you can tell me what is bothering you so much." Edward's brows shot up surprised. "Don't look at me like that. I'm too awesome a cook to throw this in the trash and you look like you could use a good meal. No arguing." Ben finished, while wiping his face from the last of the tears. Though his smile was sad when he arranged the food, he still smiled.

Slicing into his steak and chewing thoughtfully for a moment, the dark haired man asked the inevitable question that had broken the men apart. "You didn't answer when I asked if there was someone else."

Edward rubbed his face with his hands, not really having an appetite. "I don't know what happened. I don't even know what it is, but it sort of is about someone else." He paused, drawing a slow deep breath. "I think have grown feelings for someone else."

Ben's eyes watered again. "God, I wish I could make you feel for me what I feel for you. I mean, I had a hunch that you didn't, but this weekend… never mind. I hoped with time that… that your heart would grow fonder."

"It really isn't about my feelings for you. I do care for you, but… just know that you are really special to me. It's so hard to explain because I'm not sure I even understand it myself." Edward pushed this plate away, feeling revolted with himself.

Ben cleared his throat, obviously pushing back the tears. "So who is he?" he asked bravely.

Edward's earnest green gaze met warm brown eyes. "It's a woman."

Ben dropped his knife.

"I know it's absurd. I can hardly remember the last time I was attracted to a woman, let alone _with_ one. I don't know what happened, but I need to figure out what it is and what it all means."

"So you're attracted to her?" Ben asked and Edward nodded carefully, admitting his feeling to more than just Ben. Surprisingly understanding, Ben kept the questions coming. "What does she say? Does she know about you being… whatever you are?" Ben tested the word as he asked.

"She doesn't say anything because frankly, I think she is clueless to how I feel. Yes, she knows about us at the very least."

"Do I know her?" Ben had hardly touched his food, choosing only to push it around on his plate.

"It's Isabella."

"The new assistant? The woman who saw us… in your office last week?"

"Yes." Edward admitted and started to tell Ben all about his situation and confusion.

"Are you going to be okay?" Edward asked tenderly, when they were standing at the door and he was ready to leave. Ben nodded, while his eyes glassed over again.

"Yeah, I'm just going to have a date with my friend over there." He jerked his thumb at the table where a freshly opened and basically untouched bottle of wine stood. "Just… If you change your mind, come back, okay? I don't care what happens with her just know that I'm here." Edward hesitated, not really knowing what to say. Instead, he pulled his former lover into his arms. Once more, the embrace was verging on desperate. "God, I wish so much that you would just take it back." Ben's fingers bored into Edward's back, gripping it hard. His face was buried in Edward's shirt. "I love you. I love you so much, Edward." Ben's voice was muffled by their passionate embrace. "Jesus, I can't believe how much this hurts."

Edward's heart constricted with all the dark haired man's sweet words. His own wish was the same as Ben's, that things could be different.

Pulling back, Edward palmed Ben's face. He couldn't help but press his lips chastely to Ben's mouth just one more time. The connection still felt so right, but yet it wasn't enough.

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**First of all… so sorry Ben. The man has really grown on me. I want my own Ben… wait I think I have, sans the boy boy loving.**

**What are you thinking? Is Edward doing the right thing or is he jumping ship too soon?**

**Thank you to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for all your help.**

**Big thanks for all your comments and alerts. I hope to hear from more of you as the plot thickens.**

**Important message: I'm not sure I'll be able to post again until Saturday. Hubs is stealing me away. Where we are going reception is usually atrocious, so bear with me if I can't make it happen.**

**Love **

**Nelly**


	20. Day 10, Thursday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyer owns all sparkly boys, I just dream and sometimes play naughty with them.**

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**Day 10:**

**Thursday **

**Bella**

Stepping into the elevator with a cup of coffee for both Angela and herself, it was another beautiful L.A. morning. She could get used to this.

Just before the doors closed, a man squeezed his way through the closing doors. "Good morning."

Bella knew that voice. Peering up through her lashes, the dark haired man was staring down at her. He smiled. It was a strange smile filled with so many emotions that she couldn't interpret.

"He _does_ like brown eyes." Edward's boyfriend's voice was barely audible.

"Excuse me?" Bella's eyes widened as she looked up.

His lips twisted infinitesimally. "I said you have lovely brown eyes. Sorry. I'm being inappropriate," he apologized immediately.

Bella kept looking up at the man. Sure he was gorgeous, but he looked like he could use a goodnight's sleep. She couldn't remember the puffy lids or the darkness under his eyes from the last time she saw him. Behind it all and deeply embedded in the brown color of his eyes, there seemed to be something broken.

"No need to apologize. I guess then I could say the same." Bella smirked. They nearly had the same shade of eye color.

The elevator dinged and came to a halt. "Have a pleasant day, Isabella." Ben offered as the door slid shut behind her. She was surprised that he remembered her name.

That encounter was a bit strange, but nonetheless he appeared to be a nice man.

She left Angela's coffee on her desk for when she would arrive before taking a hasty sip of her own. Bella powered up her computer getting ready for today when she discovered that Edward had already arrived and that he was staring at her.

Had she grown another head overnight?

She quickly checked that her white shirt wasn't covered in coffee spill, which could have occurred before. Nope, it was still clean, so that wasn't why he stared.

As he stood and moved to the door, his intense green gaze dragged that heat over her skin again. She almost shivered from the tantalizing sensation.

Chanting to herself, _I must not feel this way_, did little good.

"Can I see you in my office, Isabella?" Edward asked softly. He looked less irritated today. That had to be a good thing, right? Entering his office, Edward sat down again. "Close the door behind you, please," he said.

With her heart in her mouth, Bella closed the door behind her and took a seat opposite Edward. Steeping his long fingers in front of him, his eyes never left hers.

"I wanted to offer you my apologies." He paused. This was it. She was getting pink slipped. Bella bit her lip, ready to take whatever was to come. He continued, "I haven't been fair to you. You asked me two days ago why I was so mad at you and I am not mad at all…" It was like a part of the sentence was missing, when he continued again. "Anyway, I think we got off on the wrong foot and I wanted to make amends."

Saying those words, Bella's jaw dropped. Did the temperature in the room just rise? Clammy sweat was covering her palms as she rubbed them together.

"You have nothing to apologize for, Mr. Cullen."

He smiled a genuine _break my heart, would you Edward Cullen_ smile. "Call me Edward, please. In any case, I do apologize for being rude and not as welcoming to you as I could have been." He paused. "It has been brought to my attention that you recently moved here?"

"Yes," Bella swallowed thickly having no clue where any of this was headed. "I used to live with my father in the state of Washington. Forks, to be correct."

"I see. So you grew up there?"

Bella frowned. Where was this going?

"No. I moved there when I was sixteen. My mom got remarried and she traveled a lot. I chose to move in with my dad. I'm originally from Phoenix."

"So how are you finding L.A.?" Edward asked with genuine interest. He put his hands down on the table, running his right thumb over the knuckles on his left hand. It was distracting.

"I'm pretty enamored with the city. I didn't realize how much I've missed the sun." Bella's voice was just a tad bit breathy.

"Then L.A. was a good place to come, I guess. Well, back to my point. I wanted to straighten things out and welcome you to the company properly. Since you're the new girl in town, please don't hesitate to ask me if there is anything you need."

"Thank you… Edward. That's very kind of you." Bella's head was utterly clouded with confusion. This was nothing like the man she had watched from afar for the past week or so. This was the man that took her breath away and he would fire her ass for it, if he knew. "Thank you for hiring me," Bella said as an afterthought.

Edward returned to his computer. "Thank Angela. I wouldn't have chosen you."

Instantly, Bella felt like she just had a bucket of ice-cold water thrown in her head. Woodenly and completely stunned by his comment she got up from the chair and left Edward's office.

_What the hell was that?_

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**Yeah… what the hell was that? What do you ladies think?**

**I am back from the middle of nowhere to say thank you so much for all your comments on my latest chapter. You are all so sweet and thoughtful, especially when it comes to Ben, poor boy.**

**I owe Chartwilightmom and Dazzled eyes22 huge thanks for holding my hand on this story. I'm almost done writing it, but hardly done posting. So much more to come.**

**See you in the morning.**


	21. Day 10, Thursday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer made up the sparkling guys and girls, I play around with them. **

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**Day 10:**

**Thursday **

**Edward**

There was no excuse for that last remark. Sure, it was the honest truth. He wouldn't have chosen her because his attraction with her had been instant. So knowing himself pretty well, he would have avoided that.

He closed his eyes, totally hating himself in that moment. The conversation had been going so well. He had gotten completely carried away, just being swept up by the sound of her voice and what she was willing to offer of her background. Instantly, he had been so hungry to keep her talking that he barely managed to reel in his curiosity.

Though accepting that he was attracted to Isabella, he wasn't ready to jump head first into the deep end of the pool. No, he was only ready to just dip his toes in the shallow end.

Last night had been torturous, not only for Ben, but for Edward too. Breaking off their affair had hurt. It really, really hurt and Edward had spent the better part of the evening doubting his decision to let Ben go. He felt so alone and retched to the bone that he had hurt his lover that deeply. He knew very well that they had grown strong feelings for each other, despite the fact that they had agreed to keep things casual. However seeing Isabella again this morning, Edward knew he had done the right thing. Isabella Swan couldn't be ignored and staying with Ben knowing and accepting that attraction was deceitful and was something that Edward couldn't succumb to. Ben didn't deserve that.

Picking up his phone, it took him more than five minutes to decide whether or not to call Ben. He opted for a text because he desperately wanted to know.

**I'm worried about you. Are you okay? E**

It took about five more minutes until there was an answer.

**Not today, but someday**.

Ben's answer was concise and said it all. Edward had broken his heart and thereby, a piece of his own.

Escaping to Studio B in need of some solace, Edward sat down at the piano in the darkness. He didn't play, just kept brushing his fingers soundlessly over the keys lost in thought. Why did all of this have to hurt so much? Why did he have to go back to being so confused again? He wanted his life back, but meeting Isabella Swan had changed him irrevocably. He just didn't know how yet.

Surrounded by darkness, Edward couldn't escape the memory of the man he let go last night. Having seen Ben around the office building and putting his ear to the wall, Edward came to realize that Ben was indeed into men. The attraction was instant, needy and above all had filled a physical void in both of them. That was where the casual concept of their relationship had stemmed from. The beginning had been physical, but it quickly morphed into an emotional connection neither of the men had addressed yet. Ben hadn't dared and Edward wasn't quite there yet, but he still cared deeply.

It wasn't hard to imagine the future that would have been had Isabella Swan not come into his life. A future with Ben was right at his fingertip, but now that she was here, it wasn't within grasp anymore. With that said, Edward would have wanted that future. Would Ben have moved in with him? Would they have bought a house together? Would they have chosen to have kids down the road?

"Edward?" The soft, honeyed voice brought him out of his reverie. Lifting his head from where it was lying on his arm over the piano, he realized tears had begun to fall. He had slipped so deeply into his grief over losing aspects of his life he thought were settled for good a long time ago.

Before facing her, Edward cleaned his face. He was embarrassed by the sudden display of emotion. "Yes, Isabella."

"Your three o'clock appointment is here," she said softly. Her brown eyes regarded him sympathetically.

"I'll be right there." Edward took a deep breath, realizing most of the day had gone by with him just sitting here.

Even through the distance, he could see her frown. "I don't want to meddle, but are you okay, Edward?" she asked, obvious concern dripping into her voice. There was no doubt in his mind that she had seen his tears.

Turning on the piano pew, Edward tiredly leaned his elbows to his knees and rubbed his palms together. He could only echo the words Ben had texted to him earlier. "Not today, but someday," he said.

Isabella tilted her head slightly to the side. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Talk. Edward knew at some point they needed to talk, but that time hadn't come yet. Besides that point and his own torn emotions, who said that Isabella Swan would even look twice at him? Just because other women had fawned over him, it didn't mean that she would. She was not that kind of woman.

"Not right now." He stood, without going to the door. "Better not to tell anybody about…" he didn't really want to admit he'd been crying. Bella smiled a small devious smile and tapped the side of her nose, conspiring with him. "Isabella?" he called after her when she was about to exit. She turned to look at him again. "I really didn't mean what I said, that I wouldn't have chosen you." He snorted cynically, suddenly seeing the irony of it all. "I already did."

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***Clears throat* Well most of you have seem a bit confused as to what the hell was going on with Edward. Did this little chapter help?**

**Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 helps pre-reading and betaing and keep my head on straight. That's no small task. Also thank you to Kroseph and Nicoconsd for your thoughts, attention to detail and help with future chapters. Lastly all your comments make my day. I love reading them and responding to them**

**Yesterday I posted the 4th chapter of ****Not For The Faint Hearted****. Check it out if you're bored. **

**Twitter… Elvirina_Nelly**


	22. Day 11, Friday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight, I just dream about the sparkly boys and girls.**

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**Day 11:**

**Friday**

**Bella**

The confusion was total and she was rendered absolutely clueless when it came to Edward. The last words they had spoken yesterday were rolling around in her head like a giant ice cold snowball.

What the hell had he meant?

_I really didn't mean what I said, that I wouldn't have chosen you. I already did._

Besides her own torment with his cryptic words, Bella found the sight of Edward looking so dejected positively gut wrenching. Immediately, she knew that she would seek the end of the world if she could ease his heartache. Edward's tears were one of the most beautiful, but simultaneously painful things she had ever witnessed.

Sleep had been nearly impossible and a phone call from Charlie this morning hadn't exactly helped her convince her father that she was actually doing rather well.

Trying to push yesterday aside, Bella started to make arrangements for the weekend. She still planned to go to the beach, but really wanted to have some company. She picked up her phone.

**Hey Jess. Going to the beach tomorrow. Wanna join me? Bella. P.S. Not a date, but as girls who are friends. **

Bella giggled as she hit send, but immediately regretted trying to be funny. The text could be perceived as really rude and that was not her attention at all. Jessica was a sweet girl and she really didn't want to jeopardize fifty percent of her friends.

She was all sorts of nervous and almost rang Jessica to say sorry when a text buzzed in.

**Getting shot down before I even put on the charm, so disappointing. It's a date… *rolls eyes and groans.* You know what I mean. Which beach?**

Bella smiled still basking in the easy going nature of Jessica. They really could be friends… She hoped.

**I'm as blank as a mirror, you pick. Bella**

**We'll take Zuma Beach. You surf?**

Bella's brows shot up. Anything athletic was far beyond her comfort zone, let alone skill.

**Definitely not. Bella**

**I'll surf, you tan. My boss is breathing down my neck. See you in the morning around ten. Jess**

Bella focused on her work rather than texting like a teenager, and as usually the day went past pretty quickly.

Having lunch with everyone else from the office today, she found out how small the world really was sometimes. Mike Newton, the strangely cheerful accountant, was originally a California boy, but his parents had moved to Forks in his preteens. They owned Newton's Outfitters. He only graduated a few years ahead of Bella moving into her father's place, but Mike had decided to return to L.A. to attend college.

"I can't believe that you're dad is Chief Swan." He snickered. "Next time you talk to him, tell him I said hello. I have a feeling he'll remember me."

"Don't tell me. You were a troubled teenager," Bella teased, feeling more at ease with just going with the flow.

"Not troubled. Tyler Cowley and I just pulled a few pranks. Some got a bit out of hand. One time, we broke into the school vending machines and rigged all the Diet Cokes with Mentos. It caused a minor explosion in the cafeteria and the principal wanted us arrested for vandalism. I'm telling you. Your dad could barely keep his face straight when he saw the mess. He thought it was really funny." Mike paused and shrugged. "Well, it was hilarious."

"Oh my god, that was you? They still talk about that now, you know?" Bella had to hold her stomach from laughing so hard.

"Really? That's awesome! I guess my legend precedes me." Mike pushed up his chest like a rooster, glowing with satisfaction.

"It most certainly does. Well, I'll remember to say hello to my dad from you." Checking her watch, it was time to get back to work. Angela left early, while giggling that she was headed off for her baby-making weekend. The girl was absolutely glowing.

Using the bathroom quickly, Bella noticed the unmistakable sniveling coming from the last of the three booths. Someone was crying.

Washing her hands, Bella noticed the person caught in there hadn't stopped whimpering, only tried to quiet her sobs.

"Excuse me. I don't mean to bother you, but are you okay?" Bella inquired.

"Yeah, just leave me alone." A small and muddled voice answered.

Grasping the handle to exit, Bella just couldn't leave when the hiccupping and blubbering continued. She went back and knocked on the stall door. "Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Not really," the girl snorted.

"Perhaps, I can get you a glass of water?" Bella was grasping at straws, but the person behind the door sounded so young. It made her uneasy.

"No."

"Perhaps you can open the door? If you need anyone to talk to, I'll listen," Bella offered, not really knowing if she was being far too pushy, but no one deserved to be sitting alone in a bathroom crying.

Slowly, the door opened and Bella was right. The woman was young, basically only a girl. She was definitely a teenager still. Her face was streaked with remainders of mascara and eye shadow and behind the battlefield of make-up were a pair of puffy and swollen eyes. Though the girl was a mess, she was excruciatingly beautiful.

"What's your name?" Bella asked quietly.

"Rosalie."

"Do you work on this floor?" she asked with confusion because Bella had never seen this girl here before.

"No. I need to talk to Edward."

Bella blanched. What did Edward have to do with this? She tried to ignore the boulder of fear lodged into her stomach. He was already hurting. "I'll go get him for you. Wait here for a minute."

oooooOOOOooooo

***Folds hands* So now you met Mike and Bella met Rosalie. What do you think? What kind of trouble do you think Rosalie is in?**

**Thank you for all of your thoughtful comments as usual. You're suspicions crack me up. Keep them coming ladies. **

**As always and forever kisses for Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for your pre-reading and beta skills. I'd be lost without you.**

**If you're on Twitter you know where to find me. Elvirina_Nelly**

**XOXO**

**Nelly**


	23. Day 11, Friday, Edward

**Stephenie owns all Twilight, I don't.**

**So I had a little moral hiccup… You'll see.**

oooooOOOOooooo

**Day 11:**

**Friday**

**Edward**

"Edward?" Isabella's voice was soft and tender when she called his name. He liked the way his name rolled off her lips. He peaked up to catch her biting her lip anxiously. "Do you know a young girl with blond hair… one that basically looks like a swimsuit model?" Isabella asked warily. "She says her name is Rosalie."

His eyes widened with surprise. "Yeah, that's my sister. Why?"

"Because she out in the ladies room crying her eyes out."

"What? She's here?" Edward asked in confusion.

Isabella nodded in affirmation with a serious look in her eyes. Edward rushed out of his seat, going to the bathroom. He could clearly hear the sobbing and hiccupping coming from… somewhere, while he could feel Bella's presence right behind him.

"Rosie?" he called softly.

"Oh god, Edward!" The door to the last of the stalls unlocked and his baby sister came rushing out. Her face was completely splotchy and tears were running wildly. Instantly, Edward's heart constricted and instincts to protect his sister flared.

"What happened, sweetheart?" he asked distraught when she landed in his arms.

She sucked in a deep breath, looking up into her brother's worried eyes. "I'm pregnant."

His heartbeat faltered.

Bella's mouth snapped open.

oooooOOOOooooo

After Edward had taken Rosalie back it his place, it turned out that she had somewhat jumped to conclusions. She _thought _that she was pregnant because her period was late, though she hadn't taken a test. So that was why Edward was now picking out two different pregnancy tests at the local convenient store.

"Hello… Edward," a familiar voice said.

Could this day get any more emotionally exhausting?

Edward turned. "Hi, Ben. How are you?"

"As well as can be expected, I guess." The other man's smile was weak and dejected. It didn't look like he had slept much. When Ben's eyes dropped to the test Edward was holding in his hands, the other man's mouth popped open.

"It's not what you think." Edward gestured with the boxes, when his hands started to shake. A huge part of him just wanted to hold the other man and seek comfort for that side of him that felt so lost.

"I know I have no right, but what I'm thinking right now would make you a liar. The woman… Isabella," Ben mouthed.

"This isn't about her. It's for, er… Rose. She got into a bit of trouble."

Ben visibly relaxed, but his eyes were instantly sympathetic. "Oh no, trouble again… but heavier trouble this time, I guess."

"Yeah, look I got to go." Edward held up the boxes. "I need to go determine a teenager's future. Fun!" he drawled and patted Ben's shoulder lightly.

Back at the apartment, Rose had peed in a cup and was picking at her nails waiting for the result in the bathroom with Edward.

"Did the condom break?" He asked, folding the instruction paper back into its sharp creases. Rosalie shook her head. Edward observed her squirming and quickly connected the dots. "Did you even use protection?" his tone was somewhat sharper.

"Not exactly. I kind of forgot."

"Jesus, Rosalie." He paused, taking a moment to battle his disappointment. "So who is it?"

"Emmett McCarthy…" She looked down and Edward was mentally plotting a murder. "Or Royce King." She shrugged. "It could be both." Edward's lips thinned to a hard line.

"You had unprotected sex with two different guys in the same month?" Edward had to reel in his temper and sudden anger with his little sister. Rosalie nodded. "Even if this does come out negative, have you even considered sexually transmitted diseases?"

Rosalie rolled her eyes, while trying to salvage some of her make-up. "It's not like _I'm_ the one going to get AIDS." In the back of it all, there was a defiant gleam in her eyes.

Edward blanched, before his resentment flared and couldn't be suppressed. "If that is joke referring to my sexuality, it is in very poor taste and quite unbecoming. If you're not kidding, you're seriously uneducated and ignorant. It's an old and malicious thought that just because I'm gay, I will automatically end up with HIV. FYI and not that it's any of your business, I have never once in my life had unprotected sex out of respect for my partner and for myself, no matter if the person was male or female. I think asking for my help, bearing in mind the situation you're in, you better consider what comes out of your mouth."

Rosalie desperately tried to blink her tears back at her brother's sharp rebuke.

"However, my point is that if you're not old enough to remember to use a freaking condom, then you are hardly old enough to have sex! For someone so bright…" Edward said piercingly and paused. "Look, I'll give you three days to tell Dad that you need to get tested for God knows what, before I rat you out. I won't tell him about this." Edward picked up the test throwing a quick glance at it. "By the way, you're not pregnant." He carelessly threw the test back on the counter and left.

Edward had gone out to pick up a pizza, but he was mostly in need of some fresh air and a break from his sister after her stupid comment. He was worried that he would end up tearing her head off in frustration. It wouldn't be productive at all when his sister probably needed someone to talk to and not yell at her. He also texted Ben the result of the test just in case he worried, which Edward knew he would.

"You should ask Dad to put you on the pill," Edward said, extending his arm and wrapping it around Rose's shoulder when they had eaten. He was calm enough to talk to her again.

"Yeah, like that's going to happen." She leaned into Edward's side, while throwing her feet over the arm of the couch.

"I'll be there when you talk to him, if you want."

"Why, Edward?" Rose craned her neck, looking up at her brother surprised.

"You're my baby sister and I want you to be safe. Though, here's how I see it. I think parents can preach abstinence all they want, but if a teenager wants to have sex, he or she is going to have sex. That's the bottom line. The problem is having heard nothing, but abstinence the teenager doesn't know how to take the proper precautions when it happens. So if I can't stop you from doing whatever it is that you are doing, the least I can do is educate you. Please, Rose. Go on the pill and use a condom."

"God, aren't you the safe sex advocate?" Her tone was somewhat exasperated.

Edward glowered down at her. "This is not negotiable. Seriously, you just dodged a fucking bullet. Isn't that a wakeup call from hell or have you already forgotten?" He paused. "Do you think it was easy for Mom and Dad having me so young?"

"They survived," Rosalie countered.

"That's exactly my point, Rosie. They survived. For a long time, that was all they did." Irritation with his sister's nonchalance was getting the better of his temper. "You wouldn't remember, but I certainly do."

Rosalie's tone sobered and her cheeks flushed. "I don't think I have the guts to buy condoms and most of the guys have them anyway." She shrugged, looking almost indifferent. Edward cocked a warning brow at her.

"Don't be naïve, Rose. You cannot ever count on the guy to have condoms. I understand buying them is probably uncomfortable for you. Though, you should have the guts to get them yourself, but I'll help you out, okay? I would much rather wish you would reconsider your behavior."

"I'll do better." Rosalie sighed. "I wish Dad would talk to me like this."

"Have you tried talking to him when in a reasonable frame of mind? It's a two way street, Rosie." Edward's tone softened.

"I know. Can we talk about something else now?" She started fiddling with a chunk of hair. "Is Ben coming over tonight? We could all hang out."

"No. Ben's not coming." Edward tried to keep his tone even, though hurt suddenly etched in his veins.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Oh Rosalie… so young. **

**Now before you ask, I thought I would stir the hornet's nest. What Edward is saying is basically my own opinion when it comes to teenagers and sex, and yes I do have kids. What is your opinion on the matter?**

**Lastly thank you to those of you who reviewed, where the hell did the rest of you go yesterday? With that said, what you think means the world to me. Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 made this story worth posting. **

**Tomorrow I'll be back, in the mean time find me on Twitter. Elvirina_Nelly**


	24. Day 12, Saturday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyer's toys, not mine.**

oooooOOOOooooo

**Day 12:**

**Saturday **

**Bella**

Staring at herself in the somewhat blurry mirror, Bella could only conclude that she had definitely caught the sun. Thank God for sunblock factor 50, but her skin was still a little reddish.

It had been a really good day with Jessica. Now that she wasn't allowed to turn down a challenge anymore, Bella was open to all new experiences. Today, she had attempted to surf, but that didn't mean she got as far as actually getting on the board and keeping her balance.

Jessica had known a few of the local surfers and the day at the beach had morphed into evening where they had a few beers with some of the guys. When socializing with others, Bella felt her stock flying through the roof. She was doing her best to not be so quiet and edit through every thought that came to mind, so that she could just speak freely. That resulted in several lengthy conversations and she enjoyed it. A few beers in and all her shy and awkwardness had dispersed.

That was the reason why the mirror was somewhat blurry. Bella wasn't exactly sober.

Slathering some lotion on her sun-kissed skin seemed like a good idea prior to going to bed. She put on a cami before crawling into the cool sheets in her panties. She barely hit the pillow before her eyes closed and she fell into a deep unconscious sleep.

Hot.

Turmoil.

Yelling.

Bella hardly registered noise before she was in deep comatose sleep again.

Hot.

Uncomfortable.

Crackling.

Bella turned over in bed, groaning and knowing she shouldn't have had so many beers. She never really drank and she was such a lightweight. Her head pounded and she was sweating.

Hot.

Ablaze.

No air.

Gasping for air, Bella knew the all too vivid dreams of her childhood had come back. She hated those nightmares. They never really had shape or form, but somehow held her underwater making her unable to breathe and tormented her when it was impossible to escape. Her mother had taken her to the doctor when she was a child and she had been told she had night terrors. She would grow out of them, the doctor had said.

Guess not.

_Why now_ was all she could think, while sitting up in bed and rubbing her face. At least, she had been able to wake up from them this time.

Feeling a cough bubbling up her throat, she fought to get rid of the retching in her esophagus. She opened her eyes, but they stung and a strange uncomfortable smell filtered though her nose. Trying to suppress whatever it was that was so suffocating, she started to heave. She was absolutely choking.

Bella started to panic and really couldn't breathe or see anything. The entire room was cloaked by some gray matter that she couldn't touch or push away from her.

She kept coughing, but when trying to breathe, the air only torched her mouth, throat and lungs.

Why was it so damn hot?

Trying to get her bearings, she realized her apartment was filled with smoke. A bone-chilling shriek of terror escaped her lungs when she realized what was happening. The building was burning. Her apartment was set afire.

While trying to scan for flames, she couldn't detect any, but then again, the smoke was too dense.

Smoke.

Smoke rises.

Floor!

Tumbling off the bed, she landed on her hands and knees. The floor that was far, far too hot. Touching it was almost like putting her skin to a hot plate. Lying on the hardwood, she could at least breathe a little, as small amounts of precious oxygen went into her lungs.

Grasping her sheet, she held it to her nose and mouth in hopes it would filter out some of the smoke and stop it from going down into her lungs. The fumes were deviously dangerous and she knew that.

Crawling panic-stricken towards the door and managing to get it open, she realized the severity of the situation. The courtyard, her escape route, was absolutely ablaze. The only way out was a burning pit of hell, an inferno of flames several feet tall.

Bella slammed the door shut going to the only windows in the apartment. They were facing into a small alleyway. Managing a glimpse through the dense smoke, it was clear those windows weren't an option either. The orange consuming flames reached her windowsill.

While contemplating smashing the window for more air, she realized fire consumed air. If there was a minimum of air, the flames would likely die out or be kept to a minimum for a while.

Adrenaline was thrashing through Bella's body. It spiked as a wave of self protection and kept her from going into a tailspin of numbing fear. As Bella assessed her situation, some semblance of relief was offered when she detected the blaring noise of sirens over the roaring of the fire. Help was close.

Crawling to the bathroom, she did the only thing she could think of. Wetting down towels she ripped from the vanity, she blocked the door and the smoke as best as she could. Soaking more towels, she crawled into the shower and curled into a ball under them. Having clutched her hairbrush in her hand, she started hammering a steady rhythm on the pipes in the hopes that somebody, anybody would hear her cry for help.

It took forever.

No one came.

Clank

Clank.

Clank.

Then three swift clanks.

Clank.

Clank.

Clank.

The temperature rose sitting under the soaked towels.

Clank. Clank. Clank.

_I don't want to die. _

_Clank_

_I don't want to die._

_Clank_

_I don't want to die._

_Clank_

Smoke started to fill the bathroom.

oooooOOOOooooo

***Evil smirks* I'm going to leave you here… sorry. My beta already growled at me for it.**

**Thank you for all your thoughts on teenagers and pregnancy yesterday. It was so exciting to read all of your opinions. Most of you weren't far from my ideology.**

**Thank you to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for your help and expertise.**

**Twitter Elvirina_Nelly**

**See you tomorrow.**


	25. Day 12, Saturday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer created and owns my favorite toys, I just get a kick out of playing with them.**

**Sorry for being a meanie yesterday, it'll never happen again. I think…**

oooooOOOOooooo

**Day 12:**

**Saturday **

**Edward**

Having taken Rosalie back home equipped with two packages of condoms, Edward was feeling exhausted. He had been caught in his own head over dealing with Rosalie and trying not to think about Ben. It had drained all of his energy.

He needed to figure out what to do with his life.

Fumbling with his phone, Edward felt almost a compulsion to get in touch with Ben. He opted instead not to call and to give him some space. It would be so easy to call him and say that he changed his mind, but that would be wrong for so many reasons.

Life wasn't about easy, but it was about doing what was right. Going back to Ben with the false pretense of having forgotten Isabella was the easy solution, but it wasn't the right thing to do.

He couldn't help, but idly wonder what Isabella had done with her day.

Picking up the remote, he turned on the TV for some white noise to drown out his thoughts. The screen was flaring with images and updates running the bottom of the screen.

An apartment complex fire.

Burned to the ground.

In the heart of L.A.

What a tragedy. Absorbed in the news of the horrendous accident, Edward mindlessly picked up his phone on the second ring. "Hello?"

"Edward," his father started. There was a lot of racket in the background and his father sounded unusually frazzled. "Do you know a woman named Bella Swan?" Carlisle asked without further ado.

Edward frowned. "Yeah, Isabella Swan. She works for me." Staring at the screen and the complex engulfed by flames like the very pit of hell, he felt terror slither down his spine.

"She's down here at Cedars-Sinai and she's asking for you. I don't have a lot of time, but can you get here?"

"I'm on my way out the door now. Is she okay?" Edward asked already putting on his shoes, without really realizing the depth of his worry for the frail looking girl. "She was in that fire, wasn't she?" he asked, barely keeping calm.

"Yes. We're absolutely swamped. Call me when you're here."

Finding himself in the middle of the hospital's emergency room, Edward had his phone glued to his ear while scanning around for his father or Isabella. All around him were people covered in soot and minor injuries, looking absolutely shell shocked.

Edward was walking slowly through the crowds when a small voice caught him his attention.

"Edward?"

He peered down at beautiful brown eyes that he had refused to acknowledge he might never see again and if so, in what condition?

"Isabella?" he slumped to his knees in front of her. Her skin wasn't the pale and flawless porcelain, but grimy and splotched with black and gray. Isabella looked positively breakable swathed in a blanket, dwarfing her small frame. Her long hair was gathered in a braid, looking strangely tussled and amputated, but still attached like a rope. "Oh Jesus! Are you okay?" he asked turning off his phone. His heart was thundering in his chest.

"I'm okay. I have a few minor burns, but I got lucky." Her voice trembled.

"Oh, sweetheart," he mouthed, carefully grasping her bandaged hand. "What can I do for you?"

"I'm sorry to call you. Well, I didn't really. I met your father when he overheard me mentioning you. I'm so sorry to bother you like this. I wanted to call Angela, but she's away for the weekend. I lost my phone and I can't remember Jessica's number by heart. I don't know anyone else in L.A. I really didn't mean to disturb your evening, but your father insisted…" Edward held up his hand, stopping her when she kept rambling apologies.

"Isabella, it's okay. Please don't apologize for anything. Did my father examine you?"

"No, some other doctor did. I'm fine, really."

"Edward, I'm so glad you're here," Carlisle said, stepping to his side. His hair was just slightly out of sorts for his normal tidy do.

"She's really okay?" Edward asked, while concerned in case Isabella was sweeping something important under the rug.

"She appears to be okay. There was a minimum of smoke inhalation, a marginal amount of soot in her mouth and nose and a few cuts and burns on her hands and knees, but that's about it."

"So I can go now?" Bella asked.

Carlisle sighed. "No, you cannot leave here on your own," he stressed.

Bella averted her eyes, looking dejected. "I'll be fine. I'll check into a hotel or something. I really don't want to stay in the hospital. There are people who need to be here more than me."

Edward picked up the gist of the conversation. "You don't have anywhere to stay tonight?"

"I told you're father I would be just fine at a hotel, but he won't let me," Bella mumbled.

"No, Miss Swan. With the risk of smoke inhalation, you may appear to be fine now, but in a few hours that may change. You are not to be left alone. I told you this," Carlisle said kindly, probably for the fourth time. Well, wasn't Bella the martyr.

"Bella, please listen to my father," Edward said. "You'll stay with me until we figure something out."

"Edward, it really isn't necessary…"

Edward turned to his father, who seemed impatient to move on as Bella started to be absurd again. "What do I need to look out for?" Edward asked, while transferring into the doctor's son mode that had inadvertently been ingrained into him since birth.

"Nausea, vomiting, coughing and sleepiness, first of all. If her voice starts to go hoarse or she becomes short of breath, call me immediately. Okay?" Carlisle said when he was already backing away and aiming for his next patient.

"Got it, Dad."

Ignoring her protests all the way back to his place, he couldn't believe that she survived. He was itching to ask about what happened, but Isabella didn't seem to want to talk about it. After she stopped apologizing for being an inconvenience, she fell completely quiet.

Standing in the bathroom in the only clothes Bella now owned, she started to pick at the ponytail holder and undoing the long braid. She didn't seem to notice Edward as he turned on the shower and began fishing out to big fluffy towel for her.

When she gasped, Edward, who had tried not to stare at her being so lightly dressed, looked over. "Do you have a pair of scissors?" Bella barely whispered when from her hands large chunks of hair flowed to the floor. "I needed a trim anyway." Edward was sad to see portions of her long hair had been singed off.

"You sure you want to do that?" Edward asked warily.

Despite Bella's torment, a small smile curled at the corners of her mouth. "I'm not going to go all Britney Spears on you. But this…" she fingered the shorter side of her hair, "is just a no go."

Watching carefully and relishing the effortlessness between them, Bella snipped off the length of hair still tumbling below the mid of her back. It just reached past her shoulders now.

Edward sat on the couch glancing sideways at Bella who had showered and tended to the mild burns with the crème Carlisle had supplied from the hospital. Her stare was absolutely vacant, void of any kind of emotion as she sat unmovable beside him.

"I hope the clothes are okay?" he said for something to kill the deafening silence. He missed seeing that small, but oh so powerful smile she had worn when cutting her hair off.

"It's fine," she answered evenly. She was dressed in a pair of his boxers, sweats and t-shirt. It was all he could come up with at this time at this hour.

"Are you hungry?" he tried asking, seeking some kind of interaction with her.

"No, thank you." she pulled her legs up, resting her chin on her knees. It was like he sat here, losing all connection with her.

"You want to catch some sleep? I made up the bed in the extra room."

Bella winced. "Not right now." She started picking her nails as she held her legs to her chest.

"We can watch some TV?" he suggested, reaching for the remote. At least, that would take care of the all-consuming silence. It was becoming unbearable.

"Sure."

Keeping an eye on Bella, it was clear that she wasn't watching the movie. She was picking at her nails and it became almost obsessive and the flicking of her fingers was just as neurotic.

He couldn't help but reach out and put his hand over hers. Somehow, it snapped her out of the dark place she had been sucked into. Her eyes shifted to Edward, they were deep, dark and terrified.

Without warning, she tilted to her side, landing instinctively in his arms. He held her. His arms circled her, while pulling her as close as possible because he was desperate to comfort her despair.

"I almost died. I almost burned to death. Oh, God! Edward, I didn't want to die. I was so scared." She sobbed, when the damn suddenly broke.

Edward stroked her hair and was glad to see all her suffering came crashing out. He was happy that she wasn't going to bottle up her what happened and let tragedy fester in her heart. She desperately needed this out of her system.

Soothing her and encouraging her to just spill whatever was on her heart and mind, he couldn't help, but notice how his shampoo and his body wash smelled on her skin. The combination was almost euphoric.

Listening to her sorrow, he couldn't escape the devastating thought that he might have lost her before he got a chance to even know her.

oooooOOOOooooo

**So have any of you ever been caught in a tragedy, knowing the feeling of absolute despair?**

**Okay, I might as well let the cat out of the bag. Some serious Edward and Bella time is on the horizon. **

**I'm sorry I didn't get around to answering your reviews, but it was either that or the next chapter. I opted for the chapter. (Roon0 and Twllife2011 were hounding me on Twitter this morning, just be glad the chapter is here at all girls. Just saying. LMAO.)**

**As always thanks to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22, you rock. **

**I hope to get to post tomorrow, though I can't promise anything. (Our food fest and present marathon is on the 24****th****)**


	26. Day 13, Sunday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyer dreamed up this wonderful story. I dream other stuff.**

**Merry Christmas and my best wishes to all of you. Stay safe and have a lovely day with whoever you're celebrating Christmas with.**

oooooOOOOoooooo

**Day 13:**

**Sunday**

**Bella**

Bella woke up feeling comforted by the heavy weight that was holding her down. After last night, she would desperately grab onto whatever made her feel so safe again.

Edward was curled around Bella's body like how Slinky from Toy Story would sometimes be tangled up around himself.

Not wanting to think about her actions just yet, she did what came natural. She nuzzled her face into his chest. Taking a moment to remember how they came to sleep this awkwardly on the couch, she recalled just how good it felt to just let go of all reins and let it all out. Edward had listened through every terrified wail and had been nothing but attentive.

Bella could tell Edward was slowly waking up when his breathing altered. Then he groaned, while trying to roll his neck.

"Hey," he mused softly, looking down at her cradled in his arms. "I think I may have taken my father's advice to not leave you alone somewhat literally."

Bella smiled. "Thank you, Edward," she said, leaning the side of her face to his chest. She was grateful for the comfort he had given her.

He gave her a small squeeze before starting to let her go. Untangling from her, he groaned again and Bella looked at him questioningly. "I got the worst kinks in my neck." Edward rolled his shoulders, while standing up. He still wore his clothes from yesterday.

"Sorry to keep you here and in this awkward position. I just…" she was somewhat confused about what to say. She had just needed him like the precious air she needed so much sitting in her bathroom. She sucked in a lungful of air when fear pummeled though her veins again. She wasn't ready to go there yet.

"It's okay. It's not that I didn't sleep well." His back cracked several times when he stretched. "I haven't slept well for the past few days. I just need to get my body working again. How are you feeling?" His eyes were sharply on her, probably assessing every word that came from her mouth.

"Better than I deserve. The burns don't hurt anymore and my chest feels fine," Bella concluded, though mentally going over her body and symptoms she'd been told to watch out for. "I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable sleeping with me?" As soon as the words left her mouth, she screwed her eyes shut in mortification. She urgently hoped that he wouldn't read into the fact that she had a slight and irrational schoolgirl crush on her gay boss.

Sliding one eye open again, she caught Edward clearly suppressing a smile. "It was quite alright. I assure you." His tone was almost snide, but secretive.

"Sorry," she muttered.

"Please," he placated her upcoming apologies. He was so different from when they had talked at the office. There he was crass and quite cold towards her, at his home he was nothing but kind. She hadn't exactly expected him to be so… cute.

Bella watched Edward open the front door after having something to eat, greeting a stunning woman with auburn hair. She walked into the room followed by an elfin girl and Edward's blond sister she'd met Friday. Bella instantly remembered Rosalie's tears and looked to Edward.

"False alarm," he whispered reading into her question. Bella sighed with relief. "Bella, this my mom, Esme, and my youngest sister, Alice." It dawned on her that his sisters were so young compared to him. After the women entered, Edward's father followed in suit, looking exhausted. Quickly, Dr. Cullen ushered into the spare bedroom requesting to examine her because clearly the man hadn't left doctor mode just yet.

"Life your shirt up, please," he said, while rubbing the stethoscope against his palm.

Feeling a little uncomfortable with the request for exposure from Edward's father, Bella hesitated. Carlisle smiled kindly, still very much a doctor. "I've been working in the medical field for quite a few years. There isn't much I haven't seen."

Bella lifted her shirt, exposing her chest, so he could listen to her lungs. "Just feels a bit personal, that's all."

"I understand. I'll make it quick. I just want to make sure that we didn't miss anything last night or that no other symptoms have shown up." Carlisle put the listening device to her sternum then to her back. "No nausea or vomiting?" the doctor asked and Bella put her shirt down again.

"No."

"No shortness of breath or coughing?"

"No," Bella answered.

"Your chest sounds clear. I think it's safe to say that you're out of the woods. You're one very lucky girl." Bella barely managed a nod, as terror rocked her body thinking about the time waiting for help to come. She didn't know how long she had waited. "Isabella, look at me please. Don't be shy to let me know if you want to talk to someone about what happened? I can give you referrals. What you went through is very traumatic and it's bound to leave its mark."

"Thank you, Dr. Cullen. I think I expressed some of it with Edward last night. I cried a good bit." She smiled meekly.

Carlisle nodded. "That's good. Edward is a good listener. Just remember you don't have to carry this around alone."

"I'll remember," Bella acquiesced. As far as her trauma from last night went, the only person she could imagine talking this through with was Edward strangely enough.

Having refrained from watching any news, Bella was clueless about how bad the fire got. "Did anybody die?" she asked Dr. Cullen in a small voice. It was likely lives had been lost.

"No. That was a stroke of luck. There a quite a few people admitted to the burn unit and more to the ICU, but no one lost their lives."

Bella felt an overpowering sense of relief.

Back in the living room, Edward's mother was busy unpacking a large bag of clothes she brought. "Oh honey," she gushed warmly, though Bella had only just met the woman. "I took the liberty of bringing you some of the girls' clothes for you. Carlisle mentioned you were about the same size as Rose. Please take this, at least until you get a chance to get back on your feet."

Bella nodded suddenly feeling so overwhelmed tears welled. She still felt dwarfed in Edward's clothes, but soon realized that she lost all her belongings. "That's very kind of you."

Rosalie was quiet for the most part and kept herself out of the conversation, whereas her sister Alice chatted aimlessly about luck and fate in life. Edward shushed her several times, but gave her indulgent looks. On any other day, Bella would probably have liked the bubbly girl, but she had a hard time dealing with all the new people today.

Not wanting to be rude, Bella fought back her tears until Edward's family left, but it was a relief when they finally did. As soon as the door snapped closed, it was like Edward was in her head. His warm body was all around her bringing the solace she needed.

Traumatic events had the ability to break down personal barriers and bring people closer together. Edward stroked her hair while she let go again and gave into massive amounts of tears.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Friendships are in the making. Love it or hate it? Anybody missing Ben?**

**How are you all celebrating Christmas?**

**Thank you for all of your wonderful comment, though I didn't manage to respond. We celebrated Christmas Eve yesterday, so between family coming and going, cooking a huge meal and trying to keep the kids from going into a sugar induced coma, I was left with very little time. However, all your comments touched me.**

**Have a great day all of you, and I hope I'll be able to post again tomorrow, but I have another food fest on the horizon. **

**Big sloppy kisses for Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for all your help. **

**Laters**


	27. Day 13, Sunday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer got rich of Twilight, she struck gold. I just spend my time playing with her jewels.**

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**Day 13:**

**Sunday**

**Edward**

Listening to Bella talk to her father and hearing her repeat over and over again that she was fine and the doctor had cleared her, he was glad to observe that she had a loving family.

"Yes, Dad. You can fly down and see for yourself if that will make it easier for you." Watching her, he could see that she was just at the brink of an eye roll and that made him smirk.

"Okay. Well, I'm staying at my boss' place, but I'll need to figure something permanent out tomorrow."

Edward's heart stung and he stopped listening. He turned the burner down, so he wouldn't ruin the spaghetti Bolognese his mother had brought over. Hearing her talk about new and permanent living arrangements, he realized he didn't want her to leave. Not yet. He had spent the day tending to her needs and enjoyed every second of it. He'd offered hugs when tears came and watched her sleep on the couch this afternoon. He simply loved having her in his space. Though her mood shifted from snarky to quiet like a merry-go-round, which was more than understandable, Edward wanted her to stay longer, so he could watch out for her.

"Thank you," she said quietly, sliding his phone over the breakfast bar.

"There's no reason to thank me. Use it as much you want. I'll get a new phone for you tomorrow."

Her eyes widened. "That pretty much surpasses your duties when taking me in. You really don't have to do that. I'll be out of your hair by tomorrow or the day after."

"There's no rush," he immediately refused. "I have the space," he said, while digging a spoonful of spaghetti out of the pan and putting it on a plate.

"Are you sure I'm not a bother?" she asked sweetly, while frowning. Right now, her mood was good.

Staring at her sitting across the breakfast bar, still wearing her clothes, Edward was nothing but sure. "Like I said, there's no rush. Stay as long as you like. Please." He hoped the closing word didn't sound as pleading as it felt in his chest, because behind his ribs, he ached to have her stay.

"Then, I accept." She took the plate Edward offered. "Oh, I accept this, too. I'm famished," Bella said and dug in.

"Well, you didn't really eat all day. So you need food."

Bella narrowed her eyes at him. "I had breakfast," she protested.

Edward snorted, while falling naturally into their sudden banter. "Half a slice of toast is hardly breakfast. Eat." He ordered, pointing his fork at her plate as he sat down across from her.

Bella smiled and put her fingers to her temple in a _'yes sir'_ salute. Edward snickered at her gesture.

Bella chewed eagerly, clearly wanting to say something. "So now that I am totally imposing on you, please don't let me stop you from doing whatever you normally do."

Edward read between the lines, but he chose not to respond. "It's fine, Isabella. You're not disrupting anything."

She smiled benevolently, while swallowing a large portion of her water. It was so good to see her eat and drink so merrily. "Well, I'm sure you have places to be and people to see."

"I have work, that's about it," Edward answered, still not really able to just come right out and say it.

Bella watched him with a shrewd gaze. "Can I ask you a personal question?" her voice was soft and not teasing anymore.

"Sure."

"Why were you upset Thursday? I mean, down in Studio B?"

Edward sighed. "Well, that is personal and rather hard to explain." He scratched the back of his head, feeling his appetite vanish. Could he explain this to her? The very person who inadvertently caused his inner turmoil? "I er… lately, I've run into some personal issues that I thought I laid to rest many years ago. I've begun to doubt things I thought were settled for good. That cost me something personal, something that I wasn't really ready to let go or even wanted to give up. Though, it was out of my hands… well, sort of. I had to do the right thing." He paused, feeling the dull ache in his chest spread like a mist in the morning. Edward studied Bella intensely. She had no idea the impact she had on his life.

Bella regarded him sympathetically. Her eyes were so gentle and soft. "What did you have to let go?" she asked sweetly.

"Ben," Edward answered simply.

Bella's mouth fell open. "I'm so sorry to hear that."

Edward wasn't able to respond. Was he sorry? Yes, he was and no, he wasn't. He pushed his plate of food away.

Having procrastinated and dodging the entire subject of going to bed, Bella was dozing off on the couch. Edward watched her lids grow heavy and slip over her eyes.

He was tired. He wanted to say goodnight to her hours ago, but the thought of going back to bed didn't resonate with him. He wanted something more. He wanted a good night's sleep and that wasn't going to happen without her frail and warm body next to his. There was no excuse for it. He just wanted her lying next to him, so he could listen to her breathe.

To get what he wanted, Edward played a dirty trick.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Yeah… I think I'm going to leave you hanging here. **

**So please, what are we thinking?**

**Thank you for all of your Christmas stories. The one from Italy left me hungry. Can I come over?**

**And I have a shameless plea for you, now that it is a time of charity. The reviews are more than dwindling. I fear it's because you do not like the story, is that true? Help a girl out and let me reach 400 comments perhaps within the new year. *Nods* I am review h00r, no doubt about it.**

**Thank you to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for pre-reading and betaing.**

**See you tomorrow and one more for good measure. **

_**Merry Christmas.**_


	28. Day 14, Monday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyer created, I borrow.**

**Starting today by saying thank you for giving me a boost of confidence on a bad day. Big sloppy kisses for all my wonderful readers and reviewers.**

**Nuff said, back to business. **

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**Day 14:**

**Monday**

**Bella**

"Oh don't give me that. I am so imposing on your personal space," Bella muttered tartly, when she once more apologized for having slept with Edward wrapped around her and in his bed of all places. In her foggy and tired mind, she hadn't been able to resist the lure of feeling so safe for another night. It turned out that Edward had a point. The tears had been back with full force last night after they went to bed. After being all cried out, she would gladly admit she slept better than she thought possible after the fire. There hadn't been anything sordid or skin on skin happening. It had only fabric to fabric as they were cuddled up with each other.

"Trust me, it's not a problem," Edward refused, while pouring another cup of coffee. Bella noticed his hair was still damp from his shower and his shirt was left untucked. He looked deliciously homey.

Bella decided to let the argument go. "So I guess I don't need to call Angela to let her know I'm not coming in today?" Bella bantered, while sitting at the breakfast bar and wearing his sweats and shirt.

Edward snickered and rolled his eyes. "I think I can manage to tell my assistant that her assistant is taking a sick day." He held the cup to his lips and took a careful sip. "So when will your dad get here?"

"He took a morning flight, so I guess around eleven?"

"Good. Now take the time you need and if you start to feel bad, call me, okay? Don't let it all get stuck in your head," Edward encouraged.

Bella smiled at his already overprotective manner towards her. Well, he did have two very teenagy teenage sisters. It probably came natural to him, but Bella appreciated it more than she could ever put into words.

"I promise." With that, Edward finished getting ready and went to work.

Wearing tight fitted jeans, which were hugging her thighs, a tank top and a very soft cardigan that probably belonged to Rosalie, Bella opened the door to her father. She literally fell into his embrace and greedily inhaling his woodsy scent.

"Oh Daddy," she mumbled into his chest, as she felt him hug her fiercely before he held her at arm's length. He plainly scanned her body from head to toe to really make sure that his daughter was okay.

"I called your mother…" Bella's father said warily, his tone lingering in between a question and a statement.

Bella shook her head, looking almost appalled. "You shouldn't have done that. I'm fine. You know she'll go into a tailspin about karma and that she must have done something wrong in a former life and then sum it all up to her failing somewhere in my childhood."

He shrugged bashfully. "I talked her down for the most part." Charlie then did something rare. He smirked and pulled her into yet another embrace. "I'm so thankful that you're okay."

"I'm fine, Dad." Bella repeated like a mantra.

"So where is this boy you're staying with?" Bella's father was suddenly very protective of his little girl again, making her feel like she was ten years old.

"Edward is hardly a boy." She regretted those words when Charlie's teeth gnashed together. It was pretty clear how it all looked to him. "You don't have to worry, Dad. Edward is not like that." Charlie gave her a dubious look, saying something like _Oh, sweetheart. All men are like that._ Bella immediately rose to Edward's defense. He had been nothing but welcoming and helpful, well, disregarding the first few days at the office. "He has a boyfriend." The lie popped out of her mouth, before she could catch it. Bella had hardly forgotten the pained look on Edward's face last night when he told her that he had broken up with Ben. She had wanted nothing but to hug him back and offer him support where she could. Edward hurting physically hurt her.

At least, her father seemed happy about the boyfriend factor, though she wasn't sure if the comment was for mostly for his benefit or not.

Taking a walk, Bella had her arm hinged with Charlie's. "By the way, Mike Newton says hi."

Charlie smoothed his thumb and pointer finger over his thick moustache. "Now why does that name ring a bell?" he mused.

"Mentos?" Bella prompted snidely.

"Oh, the beach boy. Wonder what happened to him?"

"He's got a job as an accountant with Cullen Music. I work with him, Dad," Bella looked up at her father, feeling quite amused.

"No!" Charlie gasped shocked and his eyes widened.

"Don't worry. I don't drink Diet Coke around him," Bella countered.

Charlie stopped and turned to his daughter that he'd seen no less than three weeks ago. He studied her thoroughly "You've changed, Bells. You've finally come out of your shell. Having been through hell less than two days ago and yet you can stand here smiling," Charlie said fondly. "That is truly an accomplishment."

"Oh, Dad. Don't go all mushy on me." Bella grasped his arm again, while leaning her head on his broad shoulder. Yes, she had faced hell, but it made her change all the better. She felt like she deserved it and having her father notice was better than the change itself.

Charlie spent several hours that afternoon somewhat out of his comfort zone as his daughter shopped for a few essentials on his credit card - shampoos and conditioners, deodorant, make-up and lastly, bras and panties. They weren't Charlie's forte, but he was very patient while Bella procured few of the things that she was missing now.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Daddy time, there's nothing like it… I think. **

**Anybody have a daddy like this?**

**I never did, mine is dead and gone, and I have to say I'm not even sad about it. He never did anything to deserve to be called 'daddy', so I refused. *evil smirks* The power of a child's mind.**

**If all goes well you lovely ladies have helped me to 400 reviews tonight. That never happened before. Thank you and more sloppy kisses for you.**

**Thank you to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22, you know what you do.**

**Tomorrow lovelies. **


	29. Day 14, Monday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer thought up these hunky vamps, I played around and made them human.**

**Okay, ff blew up yesterday and hits were through the roof. Besides that I feel so spoiled with all your comments ladies. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. I really enjoyed reading all of your daddy stories and I was glad to read that some of you were lucky enough to have man in their life worthy of the title DAD. Personally, I am ecstatic to watch my hubs earn his title with our kids every single day.**

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**Day 14:**

**Monday**

**Edward**

Edward could hear Charlie snoring in the guest bedroom originally made up for the girl lying next to him. It had taken some effortless coercing of Bella's father trying to get everything arranged like Edward wanted. It hadn't worked. Seeing the dejected look in Bella's eyes, when Charlie had been a stick in the wheel about their normal sleeping arrangements, had almost killed him. So instead Edward had succumbed to a little white lie. So as far as Charlie Swan knew, Edward was supposedly spending the night on the couch. He had snuck back into his own bedroom when her father was asleep. It was so juvenile, but Edward knew Bella needed him.

Edward looked at Bella, and her eyes were lost somewhere. He knew her mind had gone to places that were terrifying her. The tears hadn't come yet, but Edward knew they would.

Her dark hair splayed over his white pillows pleased him more than words could say, though the tresses were still uneven and ruined from the fire.

He had to hold back from brushing his fingers over her face to bring her out of her horrible memories, but it wouldn't help. Bella needed to do this on her own account and she would. She was so strong and Edward knew she would turn to him when the tears came. That was how it had worked so far. He just needed to be patient with her.

In the meantime, he could just lay here and enjoy the sight of her.

What brought her a large step back was that Bella had gone with her father to see the burned down apartment complex in the late afternoon. She had insisted that she needed to face what happened in order to put it behind her.

The woman lying next to him in bed, wearing his pajama pants and a t-shirt was so incredible strong that he was in complete awe of her.

Bella turned her head and tears oozed from her eyes. "It was my own fault, you know?"

Edward reached out and played with a few strands of her hair between the tips of his fingers. "What was your fault?"

"The reason I got caught in the fire."

"I can't imagine that was your fault at all," Edward answered quietly. "They said on the news it was probably some faulty wiring."

"It was. That night, when everyone else was evacuated, I was sleeping. I didn't hear them hammering on my door." Her voice was threadbare and threatening to break any time now.

"You're a heavy sleeper that hardly makes it your fault."

Then the sobs came following torrents of tears. "Oh, it was stupid. I was sleeping so heavily because I was drunk."

Edward pulled back a little surprised by her answer. "Why were you drunk?" he asked softly without judgment.

"Jess and I were out all day and we had a few beers. Well, I had more than my share," she managed between cries of agony.

"Who's Jess?" Edward prompted to keep her talking when Bella crawled into his arms.

A giggle merged with her hiccupping. "She was my date. The girl you saw me with last Saturday. We went to the beach. I had so much fun…"

"I'm glad you had fun." He hugged her tighter, while holding her flush to his body. Having her fall to pieces like this at night made it seem imperative that he physically held her together.

Bella's hands went to his neck where her finger dug into the skin exposed above the neckline of his shirt. She pushed her face against his cheek and her mouth inches from his ear. "It took forever. It took so long for the firefighters to come. I could hear them several times before they finally got to me. If I would have woken up earlier…."

"Sssshhhh." Edward hummed. "Focus on the positive. You got out. That's all that matters. You're here and you're safe."

"Oh God, the heat, the smoke," she wailed. Almost like she was fighting his embrace, their bodies shifted, she grasped Edward's shoulders and pressed her face to his chest. "Don't let my father hear me," she cried, as she lost control of her emotions and let it all out again.

Edward pulled the sheets over their heads, muffling whatever groans of agony that came from her. He felt honored that he seemed to be the only one she wanted to confide in.

It meant everything that she trusted him.

However, Edward couldn't help feeling the betrayal festering in his stomach. Bella had no idea. She was only in his arms because she thought he wouldn't objectify her in her time of need.

oooooOOOOooooo

**So… yeah… Oh, Edward, you may want to speak up… sooner rather than later. What do you all think?**

**Now that we are on daddy stories, were yours incidentally cleaning his gun when a date came to pick you up? LOL**

**Thank you for all the attention you have given me the last few days. Keep it coming.**

**Sloppy kisses for both Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for helping me out. And in case anyone is wondering about Ben, he is now recovering in the arms of AnnaLund. **


	30. Day, 15, Tuesday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyers, that's all I'm going to say.**

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**Day 15:**

**Tuesday.**

**Bella**

How many takes did one action need before it was officially a routine?

This was the third morning she woke with an _'Edward'_ blanket covering her. This was yet another morning where his arms circled her in the most painfully tender and loving way. Sure, Bella knew nothing else when it came to men, but she knew feeling Edward's skin next to hers through their clothes was right. From a different perspective, she knew she couldn't be more wrong, because this couldn't possible have the same effect on him as it had on her. Bella knew that she was so barking up the wrong tree.

Her skin was flushed, not only from the heat radiating off Edward's body, but also from the warmth slowly building in the pit of her stomach. Knowing she should avoid wallowing in this lopsided intimacy, Bella greedily took what she could. This would never go any further and she would deal with the heartache when it undoubtedly hit her.

Bella said goodbye to Charlie in the morning, when he was convinced that his daughter really was alright.

Having refused Edward's plea that she stayed back at his apartment again today, she was greeted with hugs from everyone at the office. She was moved to tears with their kind words. She knew that they all affected her life in a way, some more than others, but it was overwhelming to see that they cared so much. Maybe, they cared because she cared. Perhaps, they were so open with her, talking and congratulating her for being so damn lucky, because when she started to work here, she had decided not to be so quiet anymore. Maybe they cared so much because they knew her and not only knew _of_ her?

"I'm fine. I assure you. My doctor says I'm fit as a fiddle. There's nothing more to worry about," she promised when Mike hugged her tightly. Bella felt Edward's eyes on her face as she hugged Mike back. "By the way, my dad says hi," Bella interceded when she had heard just about all the consoling words she could manage without starting to cry.

"So he does remember me. That is so freaking cool," Mike cheered.

Bella laughed loudly.

Angela stared at her with a scrutinizing gaze and her hands were going over her chest. "So where are you staying now?" Her tone was highly worried.

Bella cleared her throat, when it occurred to her that Edward might have informed everyone about the fire, but not the aftermath. "Well…" she hedged, not really knowing what to say. She clearly remembered Angela losing several assistants to Edward's undeniable charm. She didn't want to be a number in the statistic, if anyone knew she was secretly crushing on her boss.

"She's staying with me." Edward's voice came from the door to his office. He smiled briefly at Angela, whose brows shot skyward.

"Yes, Edward has been so kind to take in a stray." Bella smiled nervously.

"You're hardly a stray," Edward countered, sounding exasperated. The '_we've been over this' _was all said by his frustrated glower.

Bella wondered briefly if it was the office that had him being so crass with her sometimes. At his place, he was always so gentle, supportive and affectionate. It was a bit like Jekyll and Hyde. Pushing the thought to the back of her mind, she needed to focus on something entirely different. "So how was your baby making weekend?" she whispered over Angela's shoulder.

"It was spectacular," Angela blushed and clasped her hand over her mouth. She simply couldn't suppress her smile and the woman was positively glowing. "Joshua Tree was amazing. Oh gosh, the scenery and hiking was stunning and the uh… project even more fun. Now the rest is up to kismet."

"I'm happy hear that, Angela," Bella said kindly, while enjoying hearing her friend's tales.

"So are you really okay?"

Bella's lips thinned. "Yeah. I'd rather not talk about it, if that's okay." The thought about opening up and letting her tears fall in front of someone who wasn't Edward was hard to envision. It felt unnatural, not like it was with her boss. At his place and in his arms, it was effortless and healing.

"That's fine. I can't believe you're staying with him. He's so selfless. I mean, I noticed that he can come of a bit cold sometimes, but he really is a good man."

Bella nodded. She had personally learned how kind and genuine he was and that he indeed was a good man. "He's helping me out with everything. That reminds me. I'm going to take about an hour to sort some things out. These insurance forms are so not fun."

"I'm so sorry, Bella. How much were you able to salvage?"

Bella snorted. "Nothing. Absolutely nothing." Images of the ruins where she used to live were etched into her brain. Everything was burned to ash. There was nothing left. All she had now was what Edward's family had lent her and the few items she had bought with her father yesterday.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Any thoughts today? Taking bets on the chance that Angela is pregnant… just kidding.**

**Thank you so much for the love you've all shown the last few days. It brings me to tears.**

**Just put the finishing touches to the last chapter and gave it to Chartwilightmom… just thought I should mention the story does come to an end at some point. *smirks***

**Thank you to Dazzled Eyes22 and her expertise. The story would be a mess without her.**

**See you again tomorrow.**


	31. Day 15, Tuesday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight, I play in her backyard. **

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**Day 15:**

**Tuesday.**

**Edward**

Edward didn't mind the repeats of their daily routine in the slightest. She sat where she had last night and the night before and so did Edward. Today wasn't spaghetti Bolognese, but Carbonara instead.

"What are you smirking at?" Bella asked, looking adorably amused.

"Nothing, really. I was just wondering how far we are from a _'yes, dear'_," Edward joked, while forking up a stack of penne.

She frowned. "Whatever do you mean, _dear?_"

Edward took a drink of his water. "Very funny," he mocked, suddenly feeling shy. Bella was so quick to pick up his often lame sense of humor.

"I know, in a few days, we're going to be bickering about who left the milk out or who forgot to turn the coffee machine off," she said, between chewing bites of food.

"Hardly. I don't drink milk and you only inhale iced coffees. No bickering will happen on that account. Though, I do see your point."

"How did you know I like iced coffee?"

"Oh, so you mean the gallon you down at the office everyday is not because you like it? Open your eyes, Bella. Men do occasionally have the ability to be perceptive," Edward bantered back. More than once, he had watched her, enraptured by the sight of her with the straw between her lips almost inhaling her iced coffee. He'd been jealous of that straw.

"Smart mouth," she muttered, trying to hide her blush, while staring at her plate.

Edward wagged his brows, as he tapped his fork against the side of her plate. "Eat."

He really tried to reel in his mood, but the elation of sharing a simple dinner with her was simply too much. Besides that, he couldn't believe that he was flirting with her so openly. However, Bella seemed oblivious.

After finishing dinner and stacking the plates in the dishwasher, Bella kept the questions coming. "Why are your sisters so much younger than you?"

Seeking some relaxation, Edward fished a bottle out of the fridge. "Wine?" he offered. Bella nodded and held up one finger indicating one glass. Her eyes were still on him clearly waiting for an answer. "How old do you think my parents are?" he answered her question with another question.

Bella thought for a moment. "Your mom doesn't look a day over forty." Her brows knit. "How old are you?"

"Twenty eight," he answered. While waiting for her to do the math, he went hunting for the corkscrew. Bella automatically picked two glasses out of the cabinet setting them on the table.

"Your parents had you pretty young, didn't they?" she asked incredulously.

The pop from the wine bottle echoed through the room when he pulled it out. "My mom was fifteen when I was born and my dad was seventeen." Edward skillfully poured the wine bringing them over to the couch in front of the TV. "Having a kid that young is a bit of an accomplishment and dad was adamant that he wanted to go to medical school. For a long time, they did their best to keep their family together and I personally witnessed that it wasn't always easy. So once my dad was finished with school and I was around ten years old, they were ready to have another kid. I was just an accident, well in reality, so is Alice. Although when the girls came along, it was at a time when they were ready to become parents, not like with me." He shrugged.

"So they struggled?"

"Some. They always had my best interest at heart, but like I said, it wasn't always easy. When you are fifteen and become a mom, the things you have to give up are endless."

He watched as Bella leaned her head into her hand, listening attentively to him. "That must have triggered some memories with Rosalie on Friday."

Edward was slightly taken aback that she so easily read into what he had been feeling that night. She didn't need for him to explain the uproar of emotions he had lecturing Rosalie about her nonchalant approach to sex and the consequences. "You're absolutely right. I got so pissed off at her because she should know better. She's smart girl acting so stupid with her indifference. I was pretty rough on her that night." Edward laughed somewhat cynically.

"I'm sure you were just a protective older brother." Bella dipped gingerly into the wine. "This is delicious, by the way."

Edward smirked. "It most certainly is." He suddenly sat up. "Oh, I totally forgot. I have something for you." Hurrying to his computer bag and fishing out a box, he dropped something cold and heavy for its size into her palm.

"Oh, Edward, you didn't!" Bella all but chastened.

"I believe I did. Now hush about the fact that it's too much because I don't want to hear it. All the numbers I could track down you had in your old phone, I had put into this one and I took the liberty of sending your new number to your parents." Edward downplayed the fact it had taken him most of the afternoon to get the phone running and log everything he could find, without snooping into it. "It's all set to go."

"You have lost your mind," Bella countered, while turning over the spanking new iPhone in her hand.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Edward the generous. So what do you think ladies, too much?**

**Anybody out there get any outrageous gift that you hardly felt entitled to receive? My hubs have gone off the deep end a few times in the past. I have to say I enjoyed it though.**

**Huge thanks to Chartwilightmom for always listening to me and making me feel better when I get slightly depressed. **

**My Beta Dazzled Eyes22 had a birthday yesterday, so happy birthday, hun. I'm happy to know you had a great day. **

**See you in the morning.**


	32. Day 16, Wednesday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyers owns, nuff said.**

**Happy New Year to all of you and I must say it's been a great year. Thank you all for reading and following my stories. You're the best. **

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**Day 16:**

**Wednesday.**

**Bella**

Tears hadn't come last night. Bella wasn't sure if she was finally cried out or it was Edward's good mood that held her together. However, the bottom line was that she didn't need to cry, but she still ended up sleeping in Edward's bed, spending the night curled up to his side and wearing his clothes.

Bella was flanking Edward walking into the office building aiming for the elevators. It was a busy morning. People were hustling to get their day started. The elevator was almost filled as they slipped past the closing doors.

"Did your father get home alright?" Edward asked.

"Yeah. He texted me when he got there." Bella bit her lip at the image of her father slowly and pointedly pressing buttons with a complete look of resolution on his face. There was nothing swift or elegant about Charlie Swan and a cell phone. "Thank you, by the away. For the phone, I mean," Bella clarified.

"You're welcome." Edward raised a brow clearly waiting for her to once more point out how unnecessary it was for him to acquire it for her. They had discussed it yesterday, in detail, before Bella surrendered and let Edward instruct her how to use it.

"You do know you went totally overboard, right? I do not deserve or need an iPhone. A simple old-fashioned Nokia would have sufficed."

Edward rolled his eyes snidely. "I know, but it's a fun little toy," he countered indifferently.

Bella snorted. "Expensive little toy." After that, she let the argument go. She had a feeling she wouldn't win and Edward was right. The phone was fun.

"I really like you hair like this," Edward commented quietly. He seemed adamant to change the subject instead of bickering over Bella's new phone. He gently dragged the now much shorter hair behind her shoulder. Bella had opted to keep her hair down, now that it wasn't as long anymore. She had finally gone to a hairdresser last night, instead of just throwing it into a bundle to hide the ruined state of it.

"It feels weird." Her nose scrunched up. "Too light, I say." She shifted her iced coffee and the Chai latte in her hand. Angela had opted to swap from her normal double shot to something more pregnant friendly, in case she got lucky. "Well, it's more work than before. Besides, we can't all just roll out of bed and look so adorably rumbled and cute like you." Bella cocked a brow, while suppressing a smile.

Edward's intense green eyes were highly amused for some odd reason. As the elevator made the first stop, several people got off and the air seemed to grow thick, like it was hard to drag into your lungs.

"The art of looking casual takes a lot of time and hair products. You know as well as I do by now I need a shower in the morning as much as the next man."

Bella giggled.

Trying to draw a few wayward strands away from her face while balancing the drinks, Bella caught a pair of deep brown eyes regarding them intently. Before Bella could say anything to perhaps warn Edward, he hefted the strands behind her ear tenderly. Sure, he had been casually touching her for days now, but that wasn't why a cold chill ran down her spine.

There was undeniable sadness in the eyes of the man staring at her. Not knowing Ben, there was no way she could decipher that look, but it made her knees want to buckle. Furthermore, Edward's casual touches were more than welcome. In fact, the crush that she was nursing was wallowing in them, but having her boss' former lover stare at her made it more than obvious how naïve she was. She could wish all that she wanted, but the truth was pretty simple. Edward's touches meant nothing to him. Bella realized the way that she wanted him to touch her someday was never going to happen. There was always the simple fact that Edward was gay.

"Good morning, Ben," she murmured quietly, while giving him a small smile before looking at the floor again.

Beside her, Edward suddenly radiated tension and his smile faltered completely. The men continued to stare at each other like they were in a Mexican standoff.

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**Whoa…. Yeah… so I am going to finish the year with this little cliffhanger. Please share your thoughts with me. What do you think is going to happen? I'm all ears.**

**Please, to those of you, who are still waiting to enter the New Year, take care of yourself. It's your most important job on this evening. **

**Sloppy kisses and best wishes to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for all your help through the year that has passed.**

**See you in 2012… just dying to say that. LMAO**

**XOXO**

**Nelly**


	33. Day 16, Wednesday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight, I only dream of Edward.**

**Hello lovelies on this wonderful first day of the year.**

**You ladies brought me way beyond 500 reviews, and between those there were some comments that brought me to tears. Thank you so much ladies. I can't begin to explain what it means to me that you voice your opinions and make me feel special.**

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**Day 16:**

**Wednesday.**

**Edward**

The elevator ride upstairs seemed to take forever. Edward couldn't pinpoint exactly why he was doing this, but the compulsion was too strong to ignore.

He quickly bypassed the newest receptionist located at the front. She looked no different than the usual run of the mill blonde Aro seemed to be so fond of. Sometimes, he wondered how Ben could stand working for Aro. This wasn't his scene at all.

"I'm not exactly surprised that I get the honor of a visit from you today," Ben drawled when he hung up his phone.

"Can I come in?" Edward asked carefully. Seeing Ben's face for the first time in days made it abundantly clear how much he missed him. The ache in his chest was solid proof. Ben wordlessly gestured to a chair and Edward sat down across the table after closing the door behind him. "How are you?" Edward asked.

Ben cocked a brow with a look that said it all. "As well as can be expected. I'm not going to ask in return though. It seemed pretty clear in the elevator this morning." There was just a hint of venom in his tone.

Edward looked down feeling a little ashamed. "It's not how it looks."

Ben wet his lips before he looked up again. The slow movement was distracting. "You seem to be saying _that_ a lot lately and last time you earned the benefit of the doubt. So what is going on?"

"It's a little complicated, but I just want to be honest with you. I don't want you hearing about this from anyone, but me. I have hurt you enough.

"Edward, break-ups aren't usually amicable. Someone usually gets hurt."

"I know. Let me just say this," Edward requested and Ben nodded amiably. "Isabella is staying with me for the time being. She needed a place to stay and I gave it to her." Edward's former lover closed his eyes and began digging the heel of his palm into his sockets like he really didn't want to hear this. "Isabella lived in the apartment building that burned to the ground this weekend. She barely made it out alive. My father ran into her at the hospital and called me. I did this, not because of how I feel about her, but because she needed the help."

"I'm so sorry to hear that," Ben said, sounding genuinely concerned. "Is she okay?"

"Yeah, she's fine. She has a few minor burns that aren't a problem and some of her hair was burned off, but that's about it."

"I see." Ben's brows furrowed and he cut right to the chase. "Do you still feel that way about her?"

Edward didn't answer. Instead, he just hung his head from his shoulder like the weight on the world was pressing him down. He felt every cell of his body ache for Ben, yet at the same time they screamed for Bella. It was tearing him up inside. Was it possible to have feeling for two people at the same time?

Ben stepped around his desk and sat down opposite Edward. "This doesn't look to be any easier on you than it is on me."

Edward peered up from underneath the dark fringe of his lashes. "There's nothing easy about this." Nervously, he raked his teeth over his lip. "Spending so much time with her has left me even more confused." Ben's wide eyes only encouraged Edward to continue to spill his innermost thoughts and turmoil to the other man. Once more, Ben proved how caring and selfless he was.

"Edward…" Ben palmed the side of his face with a touch that was so familiar and compassionate. "You know how I feel about you. You know I'm in love with you and it hurts me to see you like this. If you want me to fight this confusion with you, I promise you that I will. If you hope for a future for us, I will be with you every step of the way, even if the ride gets really bumpy. What I am trying to say is that if you want me to fight for you, then I will with everything that I have. Just tell me who _you_ want to fight for?" Ben withdrew his hand from Edward's face in favor bringing his former lover's palm to his lips.

Edward looked back. His gaze was both exhausted and absolutely torn. "I want you both and that means that I can't have either of you. She goes too deep, Ben. I can't let her go either."

Ben kissed Edward's palm tenderly. "Then don't play Isabella for a fool because that girl has feelings for you too."

Edward snorted. "I don't think so."

"Open your eyes, Edward. She looks at you the same way that I do. She would only be at your place out of convenience, if she has something to gain from it and I hardly take her for a gold-digger. So, her gain has to be emotional and personal."

"She's not into material things." Edward couldn't help but smile at her adamant refusal of his gift last night.

"Then be as fair to her as you are to me. Tell her the truth, Edward."

Edward flipped his hand over, while twining their fingers together. The sensation of Ben's skin to his palm was heartbreaking. "I know you're right," he murmured. "I just need to round up the guts to actually do it."

"Edward?" Ben whispered, while swallowing thickly. "Don't come back here again. I don't mean to sound so harsh, but if it's not me that you're fighting for then don't come back again. No matter how much I love you, I also have to protect myself. My heart can only stand to be torn apart so many times and right now, it's just too hard to see you."

"I understand," Edward whispered. He knew that needed to do the right thing, but what exactly was that?

oooooOOOOooooo

**Oh poor Edward. What are you thinking? Are you loving or hating Edward right now? What about Ben?**

**Thank you for all of your support in the month that passed. **

**Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 made this story possible. Thank you, bb.**

**See you in the morning.**


	34. Day 17, Thursday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyer's…**

**By the way, in spirit of what is coming in this chapter. **_**Oh, my god**_**, you guys spoiled me with comments last night. It was such a treat. Keep 'em coming girls, and I may post early.**

**There are a few people that I wish I could reply to thank for your thoughtful comment. Either it's not allowed or you're not logged in. Just know I wish I could answer you.**

**I owe some thanks to a few ladies on Twitter for your boost of confidence. Tyggybittz, Twilife2011, Roon0 you girls made me smile so hard my cheeks hurt. Now behave yourself… if that's even possible.**

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**Day 17:**

**Thursday**

**Bella**

Being coerced into having dinner with Edward's family, Bella felt somewhat nervous. Edward had lured her with promises of a home cooked meal, dessert and fresh air. She, in all fairness, wanted to go, but was afraid that she would impose on his family. Bella didn't want to be a bother.

"Why is it so important for me to come with you?" Bella asked.

"It's not important. I really just want your company and besides, Alice has been hounding me all day to bring you. She says she has questions."

Bella's eyes widened. "What kind of questions?"

"I have no idea, but I am sure they will all involve an '_oh, my god'_ at some point," Edward finished as he pushed the front door open to the mansion-like estate.

Bella leaned into his side. "I thought you said your family wasn't wealthy?" she grumbled clearly recalling a conversation where he mentioned how his family had struggled.

"That was when I was a kid. Now… it's a completely different ballgame." He managed to say before his mother came rushing out.

"You're here. It's so lovely to see you again, Bella. Are you still feeling okay?"

"Yes, Mrs. Cullen. I feel fine, thank you," she murmured, while feeling somewhat uncomfortable with all the attention.

His tiny raven-haired sister came running down the stairs. "Oh my god! You're here. It's about time!" she screeched.

"Alice, please. Patience is a virtue," Esme sighed, while shaking her head.

Alice glowered at her mom for a moment, before grabbing Bella's hand and dragging her away. She stopped suddenly. "I thought Ben was coming? Oh, Bella, have you met Edward's boyfriend. He's soooo hot. Right, Edward?" she beamed.

Bella noticed Edward looked down at the floor. She knew Edward had spoken to Ben yesterday, just not about what. He had been upset and quiet most of the evening. Bella hated it. "Edward said you wanted to talk to me. What's up?" she asked to divert the overly enthusiastic girl's attention.

"Oh, my god. Let's go up to my room. We can have girl talk."

Bella's brows shot skyward. Girl talk was hardly her forte. After giving Edward a small smile, she obediently followed Alice up to her room.

Sitting down on the couch in the spacious room, it wasn't what Bella expected at all. She had anticipated stuffed teddies, Justin Bieber posters, pink and frilly knickknacks. Instead, one side of the room was arranged as a working space with three dress forms clothed in various stages of unfinished garments, two different kinds of sewing machines and fabric swatches littered everywhere.

"You made these?" Bella asked, looking astonished at her handiwork.

"Yeah. It's my hobby… for now. I'm going to be a designer. I'm so going to FIT or Parsons in New York when I finish high school, but I'm not sure which yet." Alice started pacing like a tiny lion stuck in a cage. "You know about boys, right?" her face scrunched up.

Bella blanched and tried to answer the rather blunt and undefined question. "Ah, uh, maybe?" she stammered.

"I mean. I totally have my first boyfriend and it's so cool, but it's a little scary, too."

Bella tried to focus on the fact that she was about seven years older than Edward's sister. However, that age difference didn't eradicate the fact that the girl, who now sat staring at her with big expectant eyes, probably had more experience than her. Bella knew just about zilch when it came to boys… or men.

"Crushes can be overwhelming," Bella answered, not really sure what the girl wanted to know. Crushes, she understood.

Alice glowered at her while her mouth turned into a little pout. "The emotional stuff, I got down, but the physical… not so much. What do you do when the guy wants to… you know?"

Bella cleared her throat, definitely squirming. "Are you sure that you don't want to talk to your mom about this… or Rosalie?" Bella frowned. Okay, maybe Rosalie wasn't the go-to girl these days.

"Oh my god, no! My mom… I can't talk sex stuff with my mom. That's just icky. As for Rosalie, I'm sorry, I love my sister to death, but she's a slut. I hate to say it, but she puts out way too much."

"That a little judgmental, isn't it?" Bella murmured a little taken aback with how blunt Alice was.

"Perhaps it is, but it's a known fact that Rosalie doesn't exactly say no. I don't want to be like her." The overly eager girl paused her rambling for just a second. "So my boyfriend, he totally wants… the physical. I don't know what to do and I really need someone to talk to that isn't hormonally imbalanced because they're teenagers."

Bella drew a deep breath. "I'm not sure how much help I can be," Bella hedged, not really going down the road explaining her own lack of experience. "But what I think it all comes down to is what you feel like doing."

"I totally feel like doing it." The girl was practically bouncing up and down on the couch.

Bella's eyes widened. "Uh… I really don't know what to tell you, but… listen, I'm the last person you need to ask about sex because…" Alice cut her off just as she was about to confess that she hadn't exactly been deflowered.

"Oh my god! I wasn't talking about sex… well, not about going all the way. Jasper just wants to touch… you know." Alice gestured with making circles in air around her chest.

Bella let out a massive breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding. "Well, I still think it's about what you want to do."

"Then I'm totally going to let him." Alice giggled. "He's such a gentleman. He asked me if he could touch me before he did anything. I told him that I needed to think about it. Most of the guys at my school think it's their right to grope someone if he feels like it. It's gross. Just because I have boobs, it doesn't mean anyone is allowed to touch my little cupcakes," Alice kept rambling, while Bella sat still trying to keep up. Her head felt a bit woozy with all the information Alice so willingly shared.

Trying to make a discrete escape, Alice's comment completely shut off her air supply and ability to move. "You have a big crush on Edward, right?"

That left Bella even more tongue-tied. "I...I-I don't know what you are talking about." Oh, her mouth felt so dry.

"Yeah, you do." Alice countered. "Don't worry, your secret's safe with me."

"How did you know?" Bella asked when she stood up, in serious need of some fresh air.

"I just do." Alice shrugged. "Just like I know Jasper and I are going to be together forever. I just know things sometimes."

Bella smiled briefly then. "Can you tell me how it all ends then?"

"Nope," Alice said and popped the p and her face broke into a huge grin.

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**Would it be wrong to call Alice a whirlwind? Please tell me what you are thinking.**

**Thanks to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22. You're help means the world to me.**

**I haven't mentioned this for a while, but I rant on twitter or stalk people. Come find me Elvirina_Nelly**


	35. Day 17, Thursday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight, the rest of us just have an obsession.**

**Thank you so much for all your sweets words about Alice. Nobody seems to dislike this version of Alice. **

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**Day 17:**

**Thursday.**

**Edward**

Edward could hardly hold back his humongous grin when he spotted that the door was missing to Rose's room. He leaned against the jamb. "What did you do now?" he asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

Rosalie cocked a brow. "I asked Dad to put me on the pill."

"I'm glad to hear that you did." Edward gave the missing door a once over. "But I can guess the answer to that one," he acquiesced.

"Actually, Dad said yes… Then he took my door off."

"Did you get tested, too?"

"Yup. All clear."

A sense of satisfaction bloomed in his chest. Rosalie seriously dodged a bullet. "So you've decided to be more careful?"

"Yeah. I'm changing a lot of things," she said quietly and looked down studying her fingers.

Edward heard the toilet in Rosalie's bathroom flush. Seeing the guy emerge Edward was glad that he was leaning against the wall for support. "Who are you?" He couldn't help but spit at the man.

The guy smiled broadly, clearly ignoring Edward's sharp tone. "I'm Emmett."

Edward couldn't help but give the guy the stink eye. He hadn't heard many positive things about him, besides Rose mentioning that he was possibly the father during her recent pregnancy scare. To top all of that off, a shiner was slowly fading around his left eye.

"How old are you?" Edward gaped, while taking in the size of the giant man. His temper was slowly starting to flare.

"Seventeen." A loud guffaw echoed through the room as the boy laughed and pointed to Edward. "He's funny."

"How long have you been seventeen?" Edward sharply interrogated the guy, who was taller and far more muscular than him, and was casually walking around his sister's room.

"About eleven months." The guy kept chuckling and tossed himself to the bed next to Rosalie. Edward narrowed his eyes at them.

"Rose, can I talk to you?" Edward hissed. There was no way that guy was staying in his sister's room, door or no door. He was the bane of Rosalie's debacle with their father, well at least one of them.

"Look, Edward, I told Emmett everything about what happened and it's okay. I was honest with him. Let me fix my own problems. I need to figure this out on my own." She looked briefly to Emmett, who was suddenly busy studying his Rosalie's bedspread with a contrite look on his face.

Edward nodded, while seeing the honor in what she was doing. Rosalie was taking responsibility.

"How did you get the black eye?" Edward asked Emmett to refocus some of the testosterone rolling around in his body.

"Standing up for my girl. Royce tried to put a hand on Rosalie, so I put a hand on him instead." Emmett's small but wicked smile curled at the corners of his mouth. "You should see the other guy."

"We're working this out," Rosalie interjected. "I made some huge mistakes, but I'm really trying and I want to be with Emmett and he wants to be with me. Can we just leave it at that for now, Edward?"

Rose's eyes were more earnest than he'd seen them in a long time. It was fairly obvious that she had learned her lesson and was going to make the best of what she had now. However, one thing stuck in Edward's head. His seventeen-year-old sister was brave enough to face the mess she had made, then he should man up too, right? Having this conversation with Rosalie only proved how dishonest he was being with a person that deserved nothing less than the truth from him.

Edward practically fell into his mother's embrace when he ventured out into the garden to find her. "What's troubling you, kiddo?" she asked, after taking a quick survey and giving her son a concerned look.

He pulled back. "Life in general."

"That big, huh? You want to talk about it?"

"I think I have, too." Edward sighed then sat down on the grass right where he stood. It took a while for the words that had been tumbling around in his head to actually escape his mouth. "I've developed very strong feelings for someone." Edward pondered if that was even enough to describe what was going on inside of him.

Esme smiled. "That doesn't sound so bad. I know it can be overwhelming, but it's a good thing, I think. Ben seemed like such a nice man."

"Yeah, he is." Edward admitted and his heart crumbled in his chest. He started to pick at the grass.

"Then why the long face, honey."

Edward peered up though his lashes. "Because it's not Ben." Esme's face was a look of utter surprise. "I don't know how it happened and I don't think I saw it because it came right out of left field. The person I have these feelings for is a woman, Mom." Esme blinked spastically. After a few moments, she sat down on the grass opposite her son. "Ben and I were doing really, really well, but then she comes waltzing in."

"Does Ben know?" his mother asked carefully.

"I told him about her. However, I also broke it off with him. I didn't seem fair to be with him when… you know." Edward shrugged, feeling the heavy weight of love and loss start to push him under again.

"So this woman, who is she?"

"It's Isabella." Edward couldn't help his smile. "I'm trying to be as honest as I can with everyone, but it is hard just keeping my head above water. Isabella doesn't know how I feel about her. Mom, what am I going to do? I know nothing about being in a relationship with a woman. I just… God, I am epically confused."

"Uhm…" Esme cleared her throat uncomfortably. "Well…" she hedged when it was suddenly clear to Edward what his mother thought he meant.

"Not the physical part," he groaned. "I'm not explaining myself very well. I was just speaking generally."

His mother took some time to carefully consider her son's words. "Would you want a relationship with her, if you could?"

"I think I do," Edward admitted.

"Well, all relationships are unique, but if it's about feelings, I guess it's not that different from what you're used to. Being in love, in my opinion, is about respecting and caring for the one you're with and I don't think that changes depending on the sex of your partner."

"Then here's the catch. I'm pretty certain I'm in love with her and that I want Isabella, but at the same time I might be in love with Ben too. I just don't know. I could leave Ben, but it hurts. It really fucking hurt to give him up, excuse the language, but the thought of turning my back on Isabella is abhorrent to me."

"Then, I think that's your answer, honey," his mother answered kindly, while reaching out grasping her son's hand. "Follow your heart, son."

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**Should he follow his heart, or should he have stayed in the warmth and coziness of Ben? Tell me what you think.**

**I don't know about you, but I always had a soft spot for Esme, and I never thought she was in the story quite enough. **

**I asked you about fathers earlier, what about your moms? Do you get along with her? Do you go to her for advice?**

**Thank you for all your thoughtful comments. I see a have a few regulars by now and I always look forward to reading each days input as you comment on my posts. Keep it coming girls. **

**Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 always hold my hand going through chapters. Thank them that his story is even worth reading.**

**Twitter is the place to find me Elvirina_Nelly**


	36. Day 18, Friday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyer owns all Twilight. I own gay Edward and this plot.**

**Oh you guys spoil me with your comments. Please don't stop and a very humble thanks.**

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**Day 18:**

**Friday**

**Bella**

Bella's brows shot up. "You have got to be kidding me with this?" she snickered when she dug through the box that Edward had just placed in front of her.

"Nope. I'm a dork, plain and simple. Right in front of you, there's your evidence," Edward called from the kitchen.

Bella picked up one of the small wooden pieces, turning it over, assessing it. "You're not a dork. I am, however, opting for the reason that you had way too much time on your hands in high school. You really made this?"

Edward popped the cork and served them each a glass of wine before they got the game going. "I did. It took like forever, but I'm pretty pleased with it."

Bella looked at the half by half inch wooden tile with the letter L printed on it. "How did you make all of these anyway? It looks professional."

"It's a pretty simple technique really. The letters are just a basic print then inverted on a Xerox machine, put over the wood and dabbed with Acetone to transfer the ink. Then, you got a massive game of Scrabble." Edward smiled snidely and sat down on the floor next to the coffee table.

"How did you decide on what value each letter should have?"

"I stole that from the original game of Scrabble."

"How did you know how many pieces to make of each letter for it to have balance, so to speak?" Bella asked incredulously, while placing the massive board game on the table. It was far bigger than your average game of Scrabble.

"Well, that's math really. I found some statistics on how often each letter is used in the English language and then multiplied by how many letters I needed for the game and voila!"

Bella laughed. "Okay, now I agree with you. You are a dork."

"I know, right." He laughed and his entire face lit up. "Now, let's get the game started. No words less than six letters and then you have the double letter and word scores and so on."

"I got it. I do know the rules to Scrabble. It can't be that different with Mammoth Scrabble," Bella teased.

"Mammoth Scrabble?" Edward echoed. "I like that name."

"Well, you better break out the Acetone and name this bad boy, then," Bella said and started picking up fifteen tiles.

"Ha! Eat that, Cullen. VERISIMILITUDE. Fourteen letters, three times letter score and double word score." Bella was on a roll and feeling somewhat snide. She daintily made a point out of dotting down the score.

"Jesus, I can't even pronounce that, let alone spell it." He paused shifting his letters around. "However, I do have a good one myself. UNQUESTIONABLE. Also fourteen letters, quadruple word score and twice double letter score. That should mount out to something, Swan," he drawled, looking absolutely snide.

Bella paused, while twirling one of her tiles around between her fingers. Something had been nagging her, something she desperately wanted to know and so far Edward hadn't talked about it, though they talked about almost everything else.

"Why did you break it off with Ben?" her tone was careful as she approached the subject. She really didn't want to upset him, but Edward had moments where he seemed so distraught and lost in his own head that it could only mean he was thinking about Ben and his rather obvious heartache. Bella just wished she understood why. Then perhaps, she could be a better friend in his time of sadness.

Edward slowly peered over his neatly stacked tiles resting on the homemade rack. He reached out and took an unusually large gulp of wine. Bella couldn't escape the heat slowly crawling over her skin as he watched her so intently.

"You sure you want to know that?"

She tilted her head to the side, regarding him fondly. "Yeah. I know you're upset about it and I wish I could help. Sometimes you just seem so lost and it hurts me to see it." Edward looked down for a moment. It was clear that the effortlessness while playing Scrabble was gone. "Were you in love with him?"

Bella watched Edward's Adam's apple rise and sink under the skin, as he swallowed. "A part of me still is."

"Then why did you break up with him?" She asked sweetly. Edward's answering smile was almost cynically, like a lion watching a lamb.

oooooOOOOooooo

…**and that's it for today ladies. Did you enjoy that?**

**Please spoil me with your comments again, while I go make dinner for the fam. **

**Remember to send your thanks to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 along with me. Without those two ladies there wouldn't be much of a story to read.**

**I have to words for you. Tomorrow and promises… *waves***


	37. Day 18, Friday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer invented sparkly boys, I make them run around.**

**You guys are too cool. Thank you for your thoughtful comment, though many of you think I am a meanie. *Pouts***

**I was actually looking forward to showing you this chapter… so enjoy.**

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**Day 18:**

**Friday**

**Edward**

"It would have been deceitful to keep the relationship going," Edward answered quietly, while staring at the girl who deserved to know everything that was in his heart.

Could he really do this? Was he brave enough to finally have this conversation? Was he courageous enough to lose the woman he had lured into his bed under false pretenses of being a friend? He already knew he wasn't being fair to her because he didn't solely want to be a set of comforting arms around her when she had been through hell and needed to be consoled for a while. He wanted so much more.

Was he ready for that look of betrayal in her eyes when she realized that he indeed was a lion that just wanted to sink his claws into her?

She was too kind, too sweet and too innocent to be taken for a fool and be left out of the choices that perhaps could define her life. She deserved honesty and not this kind of fraudulence. Edward realized all of this, while simply sitting across from her staring at her beautiful face.

She was the reason that he had to let Ben go. Breaking up with Ben was painful. It was agony, but the risk of not having Isabella next to him to share his everyday life was devastating and quite frankly not a question at all. He needed her like he needed air to breathe.

Ironically, she didn't know what she had come to mean to him. She had no clue that what drove him through his day and the torment of letting Ben go was the chance to spend five minutes with her. She was his lighthouse in the darkness when Edward wasn't ready to let go of the life he'd built. She was his strength when he realized that all his doubts about his sexuality did indeed have a foundation and that she was it. The chaos was caused because of her and she was the epicenter of his emotional distress. His life was in ruins and he didn't know how to get back to a place where he felt safe again without Isabella. She was the reason for all of his turmoil, but yet not a bone in his body could blame her for his agony. He would gladly take the pain a thousand times over again if that meant that perhaps she felt as he did.

Would Bella do what Ben offered? Would she fight with him and help him back to a place where life was simple again? If she would, he would take the agony she had unintentionally caused him because he loved her. It was that simple.

"Why would your relationship with Ben be deceitful?" Bella asked carefully, but clearly somewhat confused. "Why did you have to end it? I think it's peculiar that you mention it like someone was forcing you hand to do it."

"Inadvertently, someone was forcing my hand," Edward countered.

"No one can force you to give up a love or someone you love," she contradicted.

"Are you sure about that, Isabella?" Edward inclined his head.

"Yeah. Nobody could tell me to not feel the way I do and then expect me to follow it. What I feel in my heart nobody can take away from me." She looked nervous all of a sudden, making a meal out of her bottom lip.

"That's exactly my point." His lips quirked in amazement. She narrowed her eyes at him. "Nobody can change what I feel in my heart and that's why I needed to do what I did. I needed to follow what was in my heart and that involuntarily was someone else forcing my hand."

Bella's mouth formed a perfect 'O' as she stared at him for long tensed moments. Her eyes clouded with darkness, perhaps what looked to be disappointment, it was hard to tell. "You have feelings for someone else?" She sucked in her lower lip once more, while digging her teeth harshly into it so the flesh whitened.

Edward nodded slowly, hearing his pulse thump away in his years. This was it.

"So who's the lucky one?" While she held his eyes she smiled, but the attempt was weak.

Slowly, Edward sucked in one massive breath of hair, making his chest was ache from the amount of oxygen. "It's you!"

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**You called me mean yesterday, I don't suppose this is any better? *wicked smile***

**My beta predicted a lynching for this little cliffy, prove her right or wrong with your comments.**

**Before I run away, hiding, quick thanks to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for pre-reading and Betaing.**

**Dare I say more tomorrow? *waves***


	38. Day 19, Saturday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyer owns twilight.**

**You guys rock my world and most of you chose not to kill me for the second little cliffy. Thank you. Sorry I didn't respond to reviews, but I am opting for the next chapter instead. I hope you can accept that.**

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**Day 19:**

**Saturday**

**Bella**

"Please talk to me, Bella," Edward begged quietly the moment she emerged in the kitchen the next morning. He sat at the breakfast bar, running his spoon through a bowl of soggy cereal.

Of all the things that she noticed right now, it was how Edward had succumbed to finally calling her what everyone else did. "Good morning," Bella answered quietly, her voice was hoarse from the lack of sleep. She had barely closed an eye all night.

Last night it was like a bomb went off inside her mind. It simply obliterated everything she thought she knew. Her crush on Edward was something she was quietly dealing with and in all honesty, it had felt safe because at that point she had known it wouldn't go anywhere. It started like a crush and it would end with a crush. But now… now with such few words from him, she felt so vulnerable that was almost unbearable. That was the reason why she had simply said goodnight and had gone to bed. There had been no discussing delicate matters like feelings.

As she lay curled up alone in his sheets and his shirt, it dawned on her that she without a thought had banned Edward to the couch or the spare bedroom since she had taken the master.

Numbly, she poured the cereal in a bowl and went to sit where she always sat. Edward was right across from her.

"Please don't be mad at me," Edward said quietly, glancing at her through his lashes.

"I'm not angry… I'm… I'm stunned to be quite frank." She loaded her mouth with cereal. It tasted like dirt and she wasn't even hungry. Her lips quirked disbelievingly. "You don't drink milk," she stated.

Edward suppressed a smile. "I'm not drinking it. I'm eating it on my cereal. There's a difference."

Bella snorted, while falling back into their usual banter. "Same difference. It's still milk."

"Are we really going to discuss my preference to milk this morning or…?" The sentence drifted into silence.

Bella swallowed the cereal. It went down her throat like gravel. "Right now, I understand milk and cereal. It's simple. Whereas last night… not so simple," Bella answered quietly, not knowing how to put into words what had been said over a game of Mammoth Scrabble. Her entire world had shifted on its axis and she was still struggling to find her balance.

Edward slowly gnawed his lower lip. "Is there anything I can say to make it simple again?" he paused looking down at the table. "I don't want to lose you," he barely whispered, which came off sounding exposed and insecure.

Bella's heart swelled in her chest, but she couldn't pinpoint exactly why. "Perhaps, we could start with me asking you a few questions?"

Edward nodded cordially.

"Did you mean what you said, like seriously mean it?" There was just a slight tremble to Bella's voice and her heart was fluttering erratically in her chest.

"Yes, I did," Edward spoke slowly, like he was treading water.

"Did you break up with Ben because of me?"

"Yes." Edward finally let the spoon rest at the side of his plate, rubbing his palms together like a nervous twitch.

Bella sucked in a long deep breath. "So you think of me as more than just a friend?"

"I think I have to answer yes to that."

Bella closed her eyes, trying to make the world stop spinning. "But you're gay, you like men," she stated flustered.

"Trust me, I'm just as confused as you are. But yes, I like men, but I also like you," he answered back. His voice didn't waver.

Bella tortured a napkin between her thumb and index fingers making it crumble. "So this past week, while I was sleeping in your bed, in your pajamas and in your arms, you weren't just holding a girl in need of solace and comfort because of a tragedy?"

Edward peered up through his long dark lashes. "I just… I don't know… I'm…" Edward seemed to pause like it took him forever to find his words. "No matter how I answer that question I will end up lying, Bella. I don't want to lie to you."

"Then don't," she dared cuttingly.

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**Was this some of what you wanted? Or is this unintentionally another cliffy, because I swear I didn't realize the first was one. **

**Thank you so much for all your wonderful comments and they came in spades last night. I feel so honored. **

**Thank you to Chartwilightmom, I had the best time last night. Also kisses to my beta that just delivered several days back to me without one bad criticism. She likes my story, yay.**

**I'll see you all tomorrow and take care until then.**


	39. Day 19, Saturday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer owns… Boy I feel like a broken record.**

**I am so surprised that most of you took Bella's questions like she is grilling him. In my opinion, she was just trying to make sense of it all. Now you get more of what is happening between them. Enjoy and thank you for your comments.**

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**Day 19:**

**Saturday**

**Edward**

There was no telling how long the tension would last, an hour, a day, a month… forever?

Edward sat on the couch with his legs raised to meet his chest. He was balancing the remote on his kneecaps and staring aimlessly at it. There really was no excuse for what he had done. If he could hit the reverse button, there was no doubt that he would. He would have revealed his feelings for his roommate, subtenant, lodger or whatever Bella was to him now much sooner. He would have dealt with the situation so much wiser.

He couldn't blame her for being quiet all day. After their talk this morning there hadn't been much to say and Edward was treading lightly. He didn't want to cause any more damage than he had already done. None of them had left the apartment at any time and that left a ridiculous amount of hours walking on eggshells around each other. They shared small and tense smiles, bashful looks across the table, moments of wanting to speak, but ended up saying nothing and offering polite apologies when they almost bumped into each other.

Now, he was left alone for the second night in a row staring into the gloomy darkness of the living room. Edward had insisted that Bella took the bedroom.

"Edward?"

His head snapped up to stare at her small frame dwarfed in one of his shirts. The pant legs pooled at her feet and he knew from experience that Bella had rolled the waistband to make the pajama pants cling to her hips.

"Yeah?" he answered carefully. The eggshells that seemed to be covering the floor were so damn fragile. One false move and you would crush them.

"Won't you come to bed?" Bella looked down to where she was fidgeting with her hands. "I can't fall asleep alone. I really need to sleep. Last night…" She didn't have to say anything else. Edward had noticed the dark circles disrupting her otherwise flawless pale skin this morning.

Slowly, he unfolded his legs and set his feet on the floor. Wordlessly, he accepted her invitation with a heavy pounding in his chest.

He watched her crawl into the rumpled sheets and a smile played on his lips. Her beautiful deep brown eyes followed him as he snuck in next to her. He kept his distance not wanting to crowd her. The last thing he wanted to do was ruin what little he had left of their friendship by making her uncomfortable. For all she knew and up until twenty-four hours ago, he was still gay and nothing more than a friend. Now… that was a problem.

Bella had her back to him with chunks of dark hair flowing over his pillow. He logged her slow rhythmical breathing into his mind, detecting if there was any change.

He noticed when her hand drifted backwards, snaking its way under the sheet until it clasped around his. He let her guide him. She pulled his arm over her waist, while bending it up so their fingers twined over her heart. This was how they had been tangled almost every night when they had slept together.

The frantic dance of his heart refused to calm down when he moved closer to her. He aligned his body with hers melting into her shape where her knees were slightly bent and he accommodated the arch of her back. When he tightened his arm around her waist, he finally allowed himself to bury his face in her hair.

She still used his shampoo.

She smelled like heaven.

Her body was still tense and her breath quickened marginally.

"I have feelings for you, too." Her voice was utterly small, nothing more than a shallow breath of air.

Edward stopped breathing, as his skin prickled with new excitement.

"I'm sorry it took all day for me to tell you. I tried. I tried so many times to be as honest and brave as you were last night, but…" Her voice started trembling.

"Sshhh," he hushed her, while holding this precious girl closer to his chest. "You're telling me now." He inhaled into her hair again and for the first time in two weeks believing that perhaps there was light at the end of tunnel of confusion. "That's what matters."

In his arms, he felt her relax and accept his embrace.

"Tomorrow… we need to talk," Bella muttered.

"I know," Edward answered quietly.

That was probably the understatement of the year.

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**So she spoke up, too… finally or too soon?**

**What are you hoping will happen tomorrow?**

**Thank you to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for pre-reading and betaing.**

**Laters. **

**XOXO**


	40. Day 20, Sunday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyer's characters, my plot. **

**Thank you for your comments yesterday and adding me to your alerts. I feel so honored you take your time to voice your opinion on my story. **

**Not it's time for a small chat.**

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**Day 20:**

**Sunday**

**Bella**

At Santa Monica Pier, Edward sat down next to Bella. He had suggested they ventured outside, since they had been cooped up all day yesterday. The weather was gentle and the temperature pleasant.

Silently, they watched people mill around eating ice cream and looking at tourists taking turns snapping pictures and kids getting piggy back rides on their father's backs.

"I just don't understand it, Edward," Bella repeated again. Confusion was clouding her mind. "What's changed?"

"I wish I could explain it," Edward answered sincerely. "All I can explain is that I can't help what I feel."

Bella smiled. "I know that feeling. I was afraid I would get the boot if I stared at you for too long or were careless with showing my feelings. Angela warned me to stay clear of you because of her previous assistants. Didn't any of those girls interest you?" Squinting her eyes, Bella defied the sun by taking in Edward's face. He was beyond beautiful, and suddenly he was the depiction of possibilities. What could or would happen between them, what were the potential between them.

"No. Not in the slightest." With their gazes locked, Bella couldn't doubt his honesty.

"I really don't understand it. You're gay… right?"

Edward snorted. "That's what I thought." His tone sobered. "I can't remember the last time I was attracted to a woman."

Bella's brows creased. "So you have been interested in women before?" she asked curiously, like she could decipher _why_ this was happening between them. "Have you ever had any girlfriends?" Bella stared down at their linked hands. His fingers were so long and his hands entirely too elegant compared to hers. She relished the look of his hand covering hers. It felt safe, though she had never been this vulnerable.

"I've never had a long term relationship with a woman. I've been with a few, but never anything more than one night. Besides, that was a long time ago," Edward answered gently.

"How long ago?" She looked up at him with wide curious eyes.

"I think I was about nineteen and a freshman in college when that happened."

"What was it like for you?" she asked with interest.

Edward smiled. "Well, unnatural somehow. Back then, the idea of men was constantly marauding in the back of my mind, but I hadn't acknowledged anything yet. I just knew something was wrong because I felt no elation and no thrill at the idea of being with a woman. Back then, I think I just went with the flow of what was expected."

Bella looked down sadly then lightly tightened her grip. "Does this feel unnatural as well?"

Edward ran his thumb over her knuckles. Perhaps he didn't feel the thrill, but she certainly did as those hedonistic licks of heat teased their way over the back of her hand. "Quite the opposite, this feels nice, exhilarating and most importantly of all… just right. Well, at least to me," he murmured.

Bella looked up to capture his eyes again. Not even as a teenager had she felt so young and inexperienced to what was happening. She had no clue what to say or how to say things, but as she had dared voicing her opinions so many times in the past few weeks, she spoke up. "It's feels right to me too. More than right, it feels like your hand in mine can take my heart and soul somewhere entirely different." It was silent for long moments when people's voices drifted into their private little bubble. Edward didn't answer and suddenly Bella was desperate to keep the conversation going as more questions were bubbling up through her throat. "How did you… when did you start dating men?"

"For a long time, I didn't date anyone. I lived a life in solitude, while trying to figure out what it all meant. Meanwhile, I did have a few encounters exploring whether being with men felt as strange as it did with women."

"Did it?"

"No. It felt right. I didn't have any emotional ties or boyfriends that were serious. I was more focused on finding out who I was and where I belonged. That was the time in my life where I really devoted myself to music. Submerging myself in my hobby saved me and gave me peace of mind for a long time."

"That must have been important to you. I can't imagine going though something so life changing and basically having no one to talk to." Bella smiled understandingly, while basking in the sight of Edward's face caught in the sunlight. His features were absolutely divine.

"It wasn't always fun, but I managed. It wasn't until last year that I told my family about my sexuality. They were pretty cool about it though."

"I can't imagine your parents raising hell over it."

"No, they didn't." Edward snorted sardonically. "It's kind of ironic sitting here discussing my sexuality like it's set in stone, when all I'm feeling is my life being yanked out by the roots." Bella stared at him with large emotional eyes. "I'm sorry. I really didn't mean it like I blame you because I can't even express how much it means to me that you haven't run screaming for the hills. I'm so grateful that you're here with me."

A slow smile spread across her mouth. "I'm right where I want to be, Edward."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," Bella acquiesced.

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**So they've started talking, which was probably way overdue… or what?**

**Tell me what you think.**

**Thank you to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for pre-reading and Betaing.**

**More tomorrow… Any requests?**

**I'm on Twitter Elvirina_Nelly**


	41. Day 20, Sunday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer Owns twilight, I'm just a mom with an obsession.**

**Thank you all for commenting yesterday and Kroseph get's her wish from her comment fulfilled. Thank you for your thought, dear.**

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**Day 20:**

**Sunday**

**Edward**

As they walked along the surf, they let the water lap over their feet and their hands stayed locked together. Small intimate smiles were shared while both took their time considering their questions and answers.

Edward sporadically picked strands of hairs away from the corners of Bella's mouth when a wayward one glued itself to her lip. This was the first time in quite a few days that he felt himself so relaxed and he knew exactly why. He was being completely honest with this spectacular and open-minded woman at his side. With all that he revealed, she had yet to pull herself from his side. She only seemed to draw closer with every thought he shared.

"Enough about me," Edward inserted, when his curiosity with Bella was getting the better of him. "What about you and love. Would you tell me about your past?"

Bella's head snapped up and her eyes were growing wide. Her sudden alarm was like a dark omen. "There's not much to know," she muttered dismissively, averting her eyes. He didn't believe her for a second.

"Whatever it is, you can tell me," Edward encouraged softly, though he didn't want her to feel pressured.

"That's the thing. There isn't anything to tell." Bella's face suddenly flamed red.

Edward's brows creased, wondering why she was suddenly so closed off. This wasn't the girl that spoke her mind to him and called him out when the conversation got tough. "Did someone hurt you?" he asked carefully as he stopped walking. A small wave washed ashore, soaking the hem of their pants.

Bella's eyes went wide. "Oh, no. It's nothing like that. You misunderstood me." She looked down and took a deep breath, while the tendrils of her hair played in the gentle breeze. "I meant there is literally nothing to tell, Edward." It seemed she let the sentence hang there midair giving him time to grasp the essence of what she was saying.

He couldn't help but slowly cock a brow, when it finally dawned on him what she was saying. "Never?"

She shook her head, while he watched her cheeks burn hotter.

Then he frowned. "Why not? You're a beautiful and brave woman. Surely there must have been someone?"

Bella sucked in her lower lip, letting her teeth sink into the plump flesh for a moment. "When I came out here, I made a promise to myself. I wanted to start over. I was fed up with being this _'suffer in silence'_ type. I'll be surprised if anyone from my high school will even remember me. I couldn't live like that anymore."

"That all sounds well and good, but what does that have to do with the question?" Edward asked in confusion.

"Well, I don't think anyone back in Forks saw me that way. Uh, I don't think anyone saw me as attractive that is. I was never asked out, I never had a boyfriend and the only time I tried to kiss a boy, I was brutally rebuffed." Bella once more let her gaze wander to the sand at her admission.

"Who did you try to kiss?"

"My best friend, Jacob Black. However, that's not the point. When I lived in Forks, my life was safe. When I moved to L.A., I started taking some risks to get me out of my shell. Since then, things have become rather interesting." Bella smirked and Edward read between the lines.

Letting his hands drift over her head and capturing all those loose strands of hair dancing in the wind, he stroked her cheeks with his thumbs. "Too interesting?" he questioned, feeling somewhat nervous.

"At times, it feels like it, but it's not more than I can handle," she answered quietly placing her hands over his on her face. "I believe we can figure this out, if we both want to."

Edward couldn't help but take a slow step closer, while aligning his body flush with hers. Leisurely, he dipped his head, while letting his lips brush hers. It was barely a kiss, but the weight of the gesture was colossal.

Her lips were so soft.

"Is this okay?" he asked gently, as he kept staring into Bella's beautiful and deep brown eyes. Her answering smile was breathtaking and she nodded a bit.

"So you really are attracted to me? Like… sexually attracted?" Bella's voice was utterly small and adorably insecure. Her face grew warmer in his hands.

Edward weaved his fingers into her hair, while still palming her face. "Like you wouldn't believe. It has changed my life, but I wouldn't want to be without it now that I know you feel the same way too."

"Edward, I'm scared. I want to embrace everything that I feel, but I worry I'm too vulnerable and a little pathetic for being so inexperienced."

"Oh, Bella, you are not pathetic. Not at all. Don't say that about yourself. You've taken a major risk with me and that calls for respect, not insolence." Edward's tone was almost admonishing.

As she rose to her toes, Bella let her lips meet Edwards, perhaps as a mean of consoling him. Their second kiss was just as tender as the first one. "So you think it's wise to let this thing between us just lead us and see where it takes us from here?"

"Well, sense and love are two things that never really go hand in hand. But, yes, I'm willing and eager to see where this will go." His eyes turned grave and his chest felt somewhat tighter. "I just can't make you any promises. My past is my past, but I'm not sure that it's the past just yet."

"Just promise to always be honest with me," Bella murmured in return.

He kissed her mouth softly again. "I promise. I'm in awe of your bravery, Bella."

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**Now the floodgates have opened and the conversation is flowing. **

**You were all awfully quiet yesterday, so I'm hoping you will open up today.**

**Thank you to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for holding my hands with this story.**

**XOXO**


	42. Day 21, Monday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyer's characters, I just mess with them.**

**Thank you all for your kind and thoughtful comments, sorry I didn't manage to answer to any of them. I'm floored with a nasty stomachache, but feeling a bit better though. **

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**Day 21:**

**Monday**

**Bella**

"I can't believe how nervous I am," Bella muttered, while dragging the brush though her hair. "I mean it's just work, but it feels so different." As she carefully placed her hair in a ponytail, Edward watched her with amusement.

"I kind of feel the same way. I think I'll walk around the office with this _'I got a big whopping secret'_ smile on my face all day." Edward's eyes sparkled as he watched Bella through the mirror getting ready. He closed the last button on his shirt, before reaching for the small squat jar of whatever hair product he used. He rubbed it out between his palms before running his hands through his hair, obtaining that gorgeous just fucked look Bella had come to favor. "What?" he asked with his hands hanging midair.

"What?" Bella's expression turned wary.

"You're staring," Edward clarified.

"Oh… I'm just enjoying the view, I guess," she mouthed and blushed.

Edward smirked, before dipping down and kissing her cheek. "Well, stare away then, I guess."

When they got back from the beach yesterday, the plan was to keep it casual, let what happened happen and not over think everything. They both knew they needed to tread lightly and what they were feeling was potentially a recipe for disaster. However, those butterflies multiplying in their stomachs every time their eyes met couldn't be ignored.

Bella knew the ice she was walking on was feebly thin. Edward hadn't exactly said that he changed his mind about men and it wasn't by some lucky stroke that he now claimed to be straight. Bella knew that, but she still didn't want to miss out on the opportunity of being with him, because his hand in hers and the gentle pressure of his mouth to hers simply felt out of this world. She had made a conscious decision that she would take the heartache when it came, but for now she wanted to bask in everything that he offered. He had been honest with her from the get-go and she trusted him.

Aiming for the elevators at the office, they both seemed a bit tense and they knew why. It could be explained by one word - Ben.

After they carefully examined the small condensed space, it was clear that Ben wasn't lodged somewhere in the back behind the other businessmen.

"Why the tea?"

"What?" Bella asked, pulling out of her reverie of facing Angela. It seemed like forever since they had talked, but it was only on Friday, but Bella's world was so different now.

Edward tapped his finger against the side of one of the cups she was holding. "I know yours is the disgustingly unhealthy Iced Coffee and Angela normally has a double shot latte. So I ask again. Why the tea?" His tone was playful.

"Uhm…" Bella hedged, not wanting to spill Angela's secret. It wasn't Bella's place to explain her friends plan to have a baby. Staring up at Edward, she knew this was probably only a forewarning to how it was going to be juggling their little secret at the office. "She probably figured out she was too hyped up on caffeine as it was." Bella had always been a bad liar and that was a skill she still hadn't learned yet. She only hoped Edward wouldn't notice. Besides that, she hated lying to him. The taste was foul in her mouth and she felt retched for having to succumb to the deceit. However, after stepping out of the elevator, they were no longer Edward and Bella, a lopsided pair trying to figure out what they meant to each other. They were now defined by a much simpler relationship - boss and assistant.

Edward's lips pressed into a thin line. She knew he knew she was lying, but he didn't push the subject.

"Good morning, Angela," Bella said cheerily when she sat down at her desk. She handed over the warm drink to the other woman. "How was your weekend?"

"Uneventful. We repainted our living room. Nothing exciting to report there," Angela answered, while logging into her email and calendar. "Edward has a meeting at nine, so can you please make sure the conference room is ready?"

"Consider it done." Bella efficiently booted up her computer, as she was eager to get the day started.

"Bella?" Angela called her name somewhat carefully. "Are you still staying at Edward's? I mean… have you found a new place yet?"

Bella swallowed against the sudden obstruction in her throat. "Er, no. No luck yet." Her face started to heat. Oh, work and fraternization with the boss was going to be a delicate square to circle.

"I want to let you know that there's going to be an opening for a one bedroom plus den at my complex in about two weeks. I basically hassled my super into promising it to me, so if you want the place it's yours. It's got a killer view and the rent is decent."

Bella could suddenly hear her own pulse thudding in her ear. "Oh wow! Thank you, Angela. Let me get back to you tomorrow." Bella's voice was suddenly so tight that she sounded hoarse.

This was not what she expected. Ten minutes at the office and things were getting increasingly complicated. Did she want to move out of Edward's place? Did he expect her to now that they were _'dating'_? Though they were trying to keep it casual and go with the flow, they couldn't deny the implications it caused living together before anything happened between them. Besides, if she said no to the place in favor of staying at Edward's home that would be like coming out to Angela. No, that wasn't true… Angela wouldn't suspect anything because her boss was supposedly gay. It had been a mutual decision to keep their private life absolutely private for now, but that already seemed to be a bit of a task.

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**This is what I got for your today. What do you think? Should Bella move out or should she stay. Let me hear, girls.**

**As always thank you to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for supporting me and devoting their time to help me with this story.**

**See you tomorrow, where there may, may not be some smooching. *Bats lashes***


	43. Day 21, Monday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer cooked up Edward and Bella, I messed around with them.**

**So the opinion is pretty unanimous, most of you think Bella should move out, put some space between them and then see where that takes them. I can't say that I disagree, but these two have a mind of their own. They don't listen to me, so will Bella listen to you… see below.**

**Thanks for reading and commenting.**

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**Day 21:**

**Monday**

**Edward**

"Angela offered me a place today," Bella said, and Edward stopped peeling the head of lettuce apart.

"Yeah?" Edward tried to keep his tone neutral, though his breathing seemed to halt on its own. So that's what had been nagging her all day.

"Mmm hmm, it's at the apartment building where she lives." She paused, while taking too much time and care stirring the pasta sauce. "I guess the million dollar question is what would you prefer I do?" She glanced sideways, as he began to suddenly torture the poor salad.

"I can't tell you what to do," Edward answered contritely. The effortlessness of having Bella around seemed to come to an abrupt end. Did he want to go back to always being alone here? He was so used to her stuff cluttering the vanity in the bathroom and her used shirts in the hamper next to his.

"So, if I put my blinders on and ignore the warning signs flaring about us living together like this, while trying to figure out what we are, is just a bad idea in so many ways that I can't even count it and tell you that I don't particularly want to find another place to live now. Is that what you would want too?" Bella rambled on in one long breath.

Edward tried to suppress his smirk and his pure elation with her forwardness. "I would say that sounds about right."

"Then that's settled," Bella concluded. Edward could easily detect the smile in her tone and it made a part of him go all giddy. "What do I tell Angela?" she asked after a moment.

"That's a pickle." Edward pondered for a moment, while leaving the food on the counter. He sauntered towards Bella, feeling all the way down into his gut that he needed to act on what he was feeling. Right now, he didn't want to bottle anything up or ignore what he really wanted to do. "How about you go see the place and pretend to be interested. Just make up an excuse that I offered you a better rent, so you can save to buy a place later on and then you can point out the stellar amenities."

"What amenities?" Bella asked a little wide-eyed, when Edward pressed her back against the breakfast bar with his body.

"These." He lowered his head, while taking a moment to suddenly notice the difference in the person he was pursuing. It wasn't that he didn't want to kiss her, just that the situation was… unexpected. He needed to bend quite a bit to find her lips. He wasn't used to a frame as small as hers, but it didn't feel bad at all, it was just… different.

Their mouths met softly at first, but that only lasted a second. For the first time, their lips parted and there really was no excuse for what happened next. The kiss grew needy and heated like striking a match only to let it drop into a pool of gasoline.

Tongues started exploring and searching, while stroking and kneading. Bella's hands went into Edward's hair, threading his locks between her fingers. Edward's hands traveled lower, past the small of her back before stopping at her behind. Cupping her ass, he once more marveled in the difference from what he was used to. He wasn't familiar with her soft female curves, but that didn't mean he wasn't thrilled with the feel of her body against his. She felt warm and tantalizing at the same time.

The supple wetness and soft sensation of her mouth completely disarmed him. Though she felt so fragile and small in his hands, he knew she was strong, probably even stronger than him.

Edward grasped the back of her thighs, and as he lifted her she was almost weightless. When he sat her down on the breakfast bar, he was placed between her parted legs. The chemistry was overwhelming and bubbling, as pressure that threatened to pop a cork.

Edward's hands were on her small waist, almost ungentle as he pulled her closer and leaned into the kiss, desperate to feel more of her.

Bella groaned in the back of her throat, while reciprocating his sensuous kiss.

The feel and taste of her was something he never imagined could be so potent.

Pulling up strength he never thought he had, Edward broke the kiss, though Bella practically followed and was clearly not ready to stop yet. While they were taking in a staggered breath, their eyes met, intense and surprised green to deep and alluring dark brown. He swallowed convulsively. "That was interesting." He didn't move back from her.

Bella smirked. "It most certainly was," she admitted. Her neck flushed with heat.

"I guess we can say that you've been thoroughly kissed for the first time." He couldn't help but tease just a little bit. Since their conversation yesterday, it had come to mind that Bella's inexperience was something that pleased him a great deal. She had a lot of firsts to cover and Edward considered himself extremely lucky to share some of those firsts with her.

Bella bit her lip. "Well, it wasn't exactly the first time."

Edward's brows shot up. "You said yesterday…"

Playfully keeping eye contact, she made a face at him. "That was Jacob Black and it doesn't count. What does counts is Jessica Stanley. I kissed her." Bella shrugged for effect, when Edward just stared.

Suddenly, he broke into a hysterical laughter. "You kissed another woman… You little minx." Bella hopped off the counter and winked, before finishing dinner.

oooooOOOOooooo

"What are you thinking about?" Edward asked when it was clear that Bella's mind was somewhere entirely different. Her body curled against his in bed was somewhat tense.

"I'm afraid that I will push you to do something that you're not comfortable with." Her voice was small and feeble opposed to daring and playful, like she had been all night.

"Like what?" Concern was leaking into his voice. Behind all the elation with this new development between them, Edward couldn't help but worry this would end all too soon.

Bella hesitated. "Like I was thinking that I wanted you to kiss me like you did in the kitchen earlier, but I'm afraid it won't be as nice for you as it was for me."

Edward pulled back some, so Bella could turn around and face him. "That kiss felt absolutely incredible, fireworks and all."

"Yeah?" she grinned, before her eyes drifted to his mouth. "Again?"

"Again," he accepted, when their mouths met once more.

oooooOOOOooooo

**I think that's enough making out for today. Good kiss?**

**Thanks to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for being my support system.**


	44. Day 22, Tuesday, Bella

**This is Stephenie Meyer's sparkling toys; I just watch them shine in the sun.**

**I feel so honored with all your thoughtful comments to my story. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. **

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**Day 22:**

**Tuesday**

**Bella**

"My lips are swollen," Bella said quietly, while trying to suppress her smile. Gently, she dabbed her mouth with the tips of her fingers.

Edward stood next to her emptying the dishwasher. "I think I know the reason why." He smirked.

Bella's cheeks flamed, when thinking about last night. There was a reason why her lips were slightly sore. Making out with Edward had been nothing short of magnificent. The scene had still been innocent. No clothes had been removed and hardly any touching had occurred, though they were in bed and both were adults.

They were equally serious when agreeing to go slow, but that didn't mean that they couldn't kiss though.

"I was thinking," Edward hedged when closing the dishwasher. "That we could go out tonight? There's an artist I want to go see and she's playing in a bar downtown. Would you want to go with me?"

Bella's heart did a double beat at the thought of something that resembled a date. "It sounds nice." She frowned. "But I think I need to go shopping first. I can't keep wearing your sisters' hand-me-downs. The only thing I bought since the fire is underwear."

Edward smiled warmly, while hooking his arms around her waist. "As your boss, I suggest that you take a few hours off this afternoon to go shopping while downing a gallon of Iced Coffee."

"I do not drink that many Iced Coffees."

"You want to bet?" Edward dared, licking his lower lip. "That's beside the point. Do you have money to buy clothes?"

"I have some my dad gave me, but I think it will be awhile until I see anything from the insurance company. However, I do get paid at the end of the month." Bella's eyes turned a bit sad. The fire was far from forgotten, but everyday it seemed a little easier not to think about it. Besides, all that was going on with Edward was a sufficient distraction.

"Take my credit card," Edward offered.

"I can't do that. First, you're boss, then you became my landlord, and what now, you want to be my sugar daddy, too?" Bella's voice was entirely too sweet when she hugged him back.

Edward rolled his eyes, before kissing her softly. "I just want you to feel how much I treasure having you here. If you change your mind, the offer still stands."

oooooOOOOooooo

The bar was crowded, but not too much. Bella sat down on the barstool, wearing her new shirt, new jeans and new Converse. From the look of the place, it was a real music hangout, offering live performances every night of the week. From afar, she watched Edward go through a few meet and greets ignoring women, who kept batting their lashes at him, before ordering their drinks.

"You'll like her," Edward said, as he sat down handing Bella a beer. She was intently watching a few people rigging up their equipment on the small stage.

"She's so young," Bella wasn't able to keep her bewilderment out of her voice.

"It's the music industry, baby. They start out before they are out of their diapers. Though, I think she's fifteen. Her name is Kim Maddi. Just wait and you shall see."

Taking a swig of her beer, Bella realized the reason why they were here. "Do you do this a lot? I mean go out and listen to artists like this?"

Edward smirked at her. "Oh honey, I make music for a living. I need to keep my finger on the pulse. So yes, I normally go out to concerts a couple of times a week."

"Sometimes, you sound so gay." Bella gasped and put her hand to her mouth when she realized what she had just said. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to insult you or go all stereotypical." She bit her lip as her comeback tumbled from her lips. Were they ready for that kind of joking? Sure, down the road that would probably be fine, but now, so soon?

Edward's lips twitched, before stretching into a grin. "It's fine, Bella. I am gay, well, at least until I met you." He cocked a brow, while taking a swig of his beer.

Bella took a deep breath. She was glad that the crisis was clearly averted and she hadn't ruffled any feathers. "I was thinking. Perhaps, the reason you feel so confused is that you're not actually gay, but a bisexual tipping the scale with ninety percent interest in men compared to a measly ten percent in women?"

Edward narrowed his eyes at Bella. "I think you're on to something. Though, I feel it's more like ninety-nine opposed to one percent." Edward hesitated, while his eyes turning wary. "Is that a problem for you?"

Bella shook her head. "Edward, I knew and I still know what we are getting ourselves into. It's not like you're pulling the wool over my eyes because we're honest and someday, which is definitely not today, this will all make sense."

Edward stared at her for several long minutes with soft and adoring eyes almost making Bella feel like she hit a fever pitch. "I don't know what I would do without you. It means so much that we can always talk to each other like this."

Bella reached across the table to grasp his hand. "Well, you wouldn't be having a problem without me and I'm feeling lucky that you even consider being with me."

Edward's face cracked into a cheeky grin. "You're such a smart mouth sometimes. Listen up. Kim's about to start."

The noise quieted down as the young girl cleared her throat claiming attention from the small stage. "Thank you all for showing up. I promise to keep the talking to a minimum and the singing to a max. Here's Uninvited by Alanis Morissette."

Bella was taken aback by the song choice and wondered if the intense lyric was perhaps too heavy for someone so young.

Looking like she belonged nowhere else but on that stage, the raven haired girl curled her fingers around the microphone and closed her eyes, while tuning into the opening cords coming from one of the two guitar players.

Bella was proven wrong. Whatever song Kim Maddi was indulging in or blessing the audience with wasn't too big for her. Instead, she brought her heart and soul to the very edge of the stage. She seemed almost fearless about doing it.

"So what do you think?" Edward had changed position to stand behind Bella, while having his hand resting on her hip.

"I think she's absolutely fascinating," Bella murmured, like her breath had been stolen from her.

"I agree," Edward whispered. "You take such pride in the chances you've taken lately, so now I'm going to take a chance. I've been watching this girl for a year now. I think the time has come to sign on another artist. I want to learn what this girl can do in the right forum given the place to grow."

Bella stood by Edward's side as he introduced himself to the girl and her father. Within ten minutes, they set up a meeting.

oooooOOOOooooo

**I am giving you this chapter a bit early today, I hope you don't mind.**

**Any thoughts?**

**Big hugs for Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for helping me with this story.**

**See you tomorrow.**


	45. Day 22, Tuesday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer owns all Twilight, I'm just nursing my obsession.**

**I just want to share a comment that I got yesterday with all of you. This is from a dear friend that you will meet later on. She captured the essence of what I am trying to say very aptly.**

_**This proves my point exactly: love is love, you just need to be open and take it when it happens, and not be bothered by the fact that the person you fall in love with is on the same side as you. Love is love. I cannot say that too many times.**_

**-AnnaLund, 2012**

**I took the liberty of editing something about genitals out. LMAO. I hope you enjoy what I have for you today.**

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**Day 22:**

**Tuesday**

**Edward**

She was irresistible. It was as simple as that. She was like chocolate fudge when craving sweetness and sugar like a mad man.

Her mouth tasted fresh when their tongues started to swirl and stroke each other. The minty taste of toothpaste only reminded him that they had been in the bathroom minutes ago getting ready for bed.

Bella was still gushing about the tonight's performance and Edward couldn't help but be captivated by her enthusiasm. Knowing she had a nice evening meant everything. Even if Kim Maddi someday turned out to be topping every album chart in the world, the look on Bella's face would still beat that.

Her warm breath filtered into his mouth as they struggled to breathe through their sumptuous kiss. It was getting increasingly hard to take it slow and keep a clear mind when giving into their attraction for one another.

Lying halfway over her, he did his best to keep his weight off her. While feeling her fingers fist through his hair and keeping his mouth on hers, Edward lost just a little bit more of his resolve. His hand traveled south, fumbling around for the hem of her shirt. She still slept in his nightwear, which made her seem even smaller as the fabric dwarfed her. Hooking his fingers into the hem, he pulled it upwards just a bit.

Breaking the kiss in dire need of a taking a breath, he peered down seeing the flawless pale skin of her stomach. His breath was still staggered as he looked up into her eyes again.

The feeling of her beneath him was nothing short of spectacular.

He looked down again, hearing her small giggle when he traced the small dip of her belly button with the pad of his thumb.

"Ticklish?"

Bella bit her lip and nodded. Her hands came to rest on his chest and her touch was so incredibly light that it felt like feathers brushing over his skin.

"Kiss me again," she demanded sweetly.

Edward leaned over her once more, capturing her lips. When he felt her tongue welcome his again, he groaned in the back of his throat. Her plump lips working with his, almost made him see stars. With Bella, it took so little to impress him. It had never been like that before.

Feeling her hands travel down his chest and drift around his waist only to start moving under his shirt, Edward noticed that her hands had to be the absolute epitome of softness. Her touch was still feather light as they clearly explored the groves and muscles of his back.

Edward knew she never done this before, well, unless that kiss with Jessica was more than she let on, but she was so brave and assertive. He could do nothing but admire the strength that made her so confident.

Edward had no doubt that her eagerness met his toe to toe, so he dared to sit back on his haunches pulling his shirt of over his head. He dropped it unceremoniously to the floor while taking a moment to just watch Bella.

Her lips were red, glistening and so sweet tasting. Her hair and eyes were matching in that luscious brown color. She truly was beautiful when she was so trusting. A small smile crept over her mouth when her eyes drifted down his torso almost shamelessly. She lifted her hand, before pointing to his chest. "That is so not fair." A giggle bubbled up her throat.

Edward clambered over her again. "What?" he asked hoping to downplay the whole situation. Sure, she could ogle all she wanted, but that didn't mean he didn't feel somewhat bashful all of a sudden.

"I guess God gave with both hands the day that you were born," Bella murmured between small kisses that they started to share. Edward felt his face start to warm. Bella pulled back a bit by pressing her head into the pillow. "Oh, don't tell me that you're shy."

Dipping his head to her neck, Edward placed light kisses to her skin. "Yeah, I'm shy and I'm somewhat nervous." Lifting his head and backing away so he could look into her eyes, he suddenly needed that effortlessness of their conversations like he needed air to breathe. "This is pretty much a first for me." He needed a piece of her strength to settle his sudden blooming anxiety. He knew his way around a male body, but her female physique was pretty much unknown territory.

Bella's hands gently cupped his face. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to sound like I was making fun of you. It's just a little surprising that you would be shy. You're so beautiful."

Edward's chest swelled with an onslaught of emotions. It never really mattered to him what people thought, but hearing Bella voice her personal opinion certainly did mean a lot to him.

"Please, don't apologize." He moved his hand back to her waist skating his thumb over her stomach again. For a moment, he noticed his hand seemed to be obscenely large on her body. "You feel incredible. So soft and feminine," he whispered as a surge of yearning ran through his veins.

Bella smiled before pulling his head down to her to kiss him soundly.

Edward's hand caressed its way down to her hip and over her thigh, hitching her leg up his waist. While they were lying increasingly tangled, his pulse quickened when arousal to have her closer dominated his mind. He didn't hold back, but was still very careful when his hand found its way under her shirt searching for her breast.

Cupping that soft fleshy mound, he felt so young and inexperienced. Her areola slowly hardened as Edward gently rubbed his thumb over the peak. Bella hummed contently into his mouth when he kneaded her breast more firmly.

For the first time ever, Edward grasped the fascination with a female body. It was so soft and completely able to be molded within his hands. There was no hardness and no strength matching his own. Instead, there was a seductive pliability and an unearthly suppleness he wanted to consume suddenly.

While touching Bella more intimately, he ached to be even closer to her. It was like a sudden and new obsession.

Breaking the kiss, Edward pulled back to get a better view of her. Her pupils were dilated and her breathing became deep and longing. Carefully lifting the shirt from her belly, he kept his eyes on hers. "Can I?" His voice trembled.

Bella arched her back, letting Edward pull the shirt up and off to expose her chest. He just stared at her.

"What are you thinking?" Bella asked gently, while tracing the shell of his ears with her thumbs.

Edward swallowed thickly. "That I want to kiss your breasts."

Bella's smile was slow and sensual. "What's keeping you?" Grinning like a goofy moron, Edward dipped his head and let his mouth explore the soft swellings. While kissing, licking and nipping gently, he lost himself in her body. The peaked nipple between his lips and Bella's innocent noises made his stomach sizzle with the need for _more_.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Uhm… I think bedroom lights are off now. **

**Some of you have been itching and twitching for some lemony stuff. I hope you got your money's worth.**

**Thank you to Chartwilightmom and Dazzled Eyes22 for holding my hand throughout this story.**


	46. Day 23, Wednesday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyer created Twilight, I just wish I did.**

**I am so sorry for not posting yesterday, I was at my friend's wedding and didn't get back in time.**

**Thank you so much for all your comments. It seems that little lemon was very much appreciated. *claps hands***

**I wish I could say that I was above this, but I am not, please hit that review button and tell a girl what you think. It means the world to me and I tend to feel a bit lost and alone without knowing what you think. So if you want to help me out, leave me some love… or just an opinion. **

**Thank you.**

oooooOOOOooooo

**Day 23:**

**Wednesday**

**Bella**

"Thank you for having lunch with me," Bella said when she saw Jessica.

When Jess was close enough, she hauled Bella into an intense embrace. The hug reminded Bella of those her mother would give her when she was worried. "I really didn't believe that you were okay when you called. I was so scared for you. How are you? You okay?" Jessica held Bella at arm's length taking a studious look at her friend.

"I promise. I'm fine," Bella answered trying to placate the woman. She wasn't really interested in traveling down the road and gushing all that happened in the fire to Jessica. There was only one person that she wanted to show that deep hurt to. It was in Edward's arms that she felt safe at all times and it was the only place she ever wanted to open up. Jess narrowed her eyes at Bella in disbelief. "I assure you the damage was only material."

Reluctantly, Bella's friend seemed to accept her explanation. "So what's up?" Jessica asked, as they sat down.

Bella took a sip of her water. "Not much… though I do have something I need to talk to you about."

"Anything," Jessica was completely nonplussed, when responding to her friend.

"Let's have some lunch first." Bella picked up the menu, and quickly began scanning the options and deciding on tuna salad.

"So how long are you going to beat around the bush?" Jessica asked, before taking a bite of her grilled salmon.

Bella drew a deep breath very clearly remembering the reason for asking Jessica to lunch. It was Edward and what had happened last night. It wasn't that it didn't feel right because nothing ever felt that good. However, for some reason she could hardly believe that kind of passion was unfurling between them. Edward claimed to be gay, then how could he feel so aroused by their kissing and touching last night? There was no way he could have faked that. Besides, why would he want to do that?

What worried her more was the way that he sometimes looked at her. It wasn't a look of confusion as such, but more… Well, there wasn't really any way to decipher it only to say that it looked like he was in pain. That was when he stopped. It was like the curtain was drawn and the show was over. It happened last night again. Bella didn't need to rush things between them. It was more the way it happened that irked her.

"Well, can I start by asking how you figured out you were gay?"

Jess' brows shot up. "Sure. Er… it's a funny story really. Actually, I don't think I told you. First of all, I'm the product of a same sex marriage. My moms are gay and they had me via a private donor. I know who my biological father is, but he's never been my dad as such, more like an uncle you get a present from every Christmas and see at family functions. I was never a stranger to homosexuality because I grew up with two moms. At first, I thought I liked girls because of the way my family was built. I know that sounds so cliché and I am in no way saying that I swing that way too because of how I was raised. I don't think being gay is a product of your environment, but it's just who you are. It's like the fact that I love comedy when both my moms hate it. They seriously can't stand the jokes, but I love it. So why do I love comedy? I think there is no particular reason other than I just do. I wasn't influenced to love comedy, like I wasn't expected or even driven to prefer women. I just figured out boys or men don't appeal to me sexually. I know some people will have different opinions, but I know what I feel. I have tons of guy friends, but that's what they'll ever be. It was sort of a natural progress, I guess."

"So you never doubted your sexuality?" Bella bit her lip, feeling pigeonholed with Jessica's scrutinizing peer. For a long moment, Bella's friend evaluated her.

"Not really. Do you doubt your sexuality?" Jessica looked absolutely clueless when she returned Bella's question.

Slowly, Bella shook her head. "It's not about me as such. Can I ask one more question?" Jessica nodded. "Do you think you could ever meet a man you would want to be with?"

"No, I don't think so." Jessica frowned. "Where is this coming from, Bella? I mean we went over this and I thought we were clear on where we stood as friends. Is it becoming a problem for you that I'm gay?" Jessica asked, clearly confused.

"Oh, no," Bella rushed to answer. "That's not my… problem."

"Then what is it because you are throwing me for a loop here."

Bella forked up a portion of salad, shoved it in her mouth and chewed it meticulously. She chased the food with a slug of Coke. Her nerves were starting to stir and she knew she couldn't tiptoe around the subject much longer. "I've sort of become involved with this man. It's with someone I never would have pursued normally because when I started having a crush on him, I knew he was gay. The situation is rather complicated right now, but it feels really good."

Jessica stared at her, much like a deer caught in the headlights. "Say what again?"

Bella chewed her lip until it almost bled, before she chose to disclose the entire story to her friend without giving Edward's name away.

Jessica looked positively shell shocked. "I must hand it to you, Bella. Turning a gay man straight." She snickered.

"See that's mainly my problem, Jess. I don't really think it's sunk in that he actually does prefer men, though we talked about it. Second of all, I don't get why me. I mean there are so many intelligent, gorgeous and talented women in this city, so if he's not one hundred percent gay, then why didn't he develop feelings for one of them? Lord knows he's had the chance."

"Oh, honey. Open your eyes. Though I actually don't have those kinds of feelings for you, I totally get why anyone should be lucky to be with you. I mean you're so easy to be around. You never judge anyone. When having a conversation with you, you are genuinely interested and on top of that you are honestly a sweet woman. Take a long look in the mirror, Bella, and you'll see that too." Jessica sat back in her chair and smiled warmly. "Don't let what I just said get to your head."

Bella held up her hands in gesture. "Trust me I won't, because that sales pitch was somewhat glorified," she tried to defuse, after hearing so many positive adjectives about herself. It almost felt embarrassing.

Jess cocked a brow. "See there you go again. You're humble… and that, my friend, is a rarity around here." Jess twirled a small bunch of parsley around between her thumb and index finger. "However, to sum up your question, if he says he has feelings for you and that you don't doubt that he's always honest, then I would say go with the flow. It's probably a bit scary, but trust him and give him time to figure out what he wants and needs. There's no manual on figuring out what you feel. If he was so assertive that men rocked his boat, then I can personally understand how uprooting it must be to deal with. I guess it's like shoving a round peg into a square hole." Jess' mouth popped open and Bella stared flabbergasted. "Okay, sorry for that analogy, I really didn't mean that. It was pretty crass in this delicate situation."

Bella tried to suppress her smile and nodded slowly. "Time," she echoed feeling quite relieved that Jess understood her precarious situation. It was nice to have a friend with a foot in the door to a situation she could never really find herself in when she wasn't gay.

"Bella?" her favorite soft and melodic voice asked nearly jolting Bella out of her seat.

"Hey!" she yelped looking up at Edward. His smile was dazzling as he appraised her. "I was… I was just having lunch with Jessica. Uh, Jessica, this is… this is Edward Cullen, my boss… Edward, Jessica Stanley." Bella hampered her way through the introduction.

"It's nice to meet you, Miss Stanley," Edward said politely extending his hand. His expression was hovering somewhere between confused and highly amused. They shook hands. It was bright as day what he was thinking right now. Their kiss.

"You, too, Mr. Cullen."

"I better get back to the office. I just stepped out to get my own lunch." Edward held up a small bag from the sandwich shop just around the corner. "I guess I'll see you soon, Bella." Edward smiled briefly before he moved away from the ladies and headed back to the office.

"Oh. My. God, Bella. You said complicated. That is complicated and a half. You're sleeping with your gay boss! I must say I'm impressed."

Bella's mouth hung open, but before she could collect herself enough to answer her phone _'pinged'_ with a text.

**The rabbit is on the road. I'll see you tomorrow. Text me your addy.**

With her head as fuzzy as if she had just stepped of a roller coaster, she texted back Edward's address.

oooooOOOOooooo

**So lovelies, what do you think of Jessica, sweet girl?**

**Please hit that review button and let me know what you think.**

**Thank you so much to Chartwilightmom and AnnaLund for pre-reading and offering their advice and a serious boost of confidence when I am at my low. Kisses to my beta for making sure this is worthy to post. **


	47. Day 23, Wednesday, Edward

**I repeat myself for good measure, Stephenie Meyer owns, I do not.**

**Thank you for your comments yesterday, there were some heartwarming ones, though I treasure every single one of them.**

**Now to business…**

oooooOOOOooooo

**Day 23:**

**Wednesday**

**Edward**

Slowly leaning over her, Edward skated his fingers over her cheekbone. "Rise and shine, beautiful," he whispered. "Time for bed."

Bella blinked rapidly, while groggily assessing herself sprawled on the couch. Her feet had been in Edward's lap last she remembered. "What time is it?"

"Just past eleven. Come to bed with me?" Though Edward didn't expect anything, there was a part of him in the pit of his stomach that hoped that she might agree.

She pulled a deep breath in through her nose while stretching. "Sure."

After having brushed their teeth, Edward sat on the edge of the bed pulling his socks off. "Sorry, I fell asleep." Bella apologized, while coming to stand in front of him. Edward looked up, as he placed his hands on her hips.

"No need for apologizing. I like watching you sleep."

Bella sucked in her bottom lip, before she bent down and kissed him sweetly. Edward reciprocated feeling hope bloom in his gut. She pulled back gazing into his eyes. "I like having your hands on me," she said quietly and he couldn't agree more.

"Yeah?" he asked, while slipping his hands under her shirt to the narrowest part of her waist. Her skin was like velvet - plush and soft.

"Mmm hmm," she hummed. "But there is something that I don't understand."

"What's that?" Edward asked quietly, appreciating the moisture glistening on her lips. She looked delectable.

"Last night. Why did you stop?"

Edward closed his eyes, while feeling that frustrating confusion sweep over him again. He really didn't want to hurt her with his bewilderment. She didn't deserve that. Bella pulled in a deep breath. "I know practically nothing about sex and how all of this is supposed to go. I can only react to the way I feel and the way you make me feel."

"What do you mean?" Edward asked somewhat confused. Bella pulled back some.

"I mean you kiss me and it feels amazing. You touched me last night and it felt so good. Then you look at me like you want so much _more_, and I mean physically, but you pull away completely like I've branded you or insulted you. I don't understand it."

Edward's frustration was like a black empty hole in the pit of his stomach. "I know. I know, Bella. I'm so sorry for all the mixed signals," Edward sighed, leaning his forehead to her stomach. He was silent for a while, before looking up again. "I'll try to explain it because I'm going to pieces myself, but it's all of this." He gestured to her body.

Bella looked disgruntled. "You don't like the way I look?" By the look in her eyes, he knew hurt was already spreading around her chest.

"No, not at all. Well… It's this." He put his hands back on her waist, squeezing gently. "Like here, you're so tiny and it feels strange to me. Your body is so soft and different from what I'm… used to."

"So that's the problem… you don't want to be with me? I mean the physical aspect of this whole… debacle." Edward picked up the slight tremble in her tone. He was completely desolate if this was how she perceived his insecurity. The emotional bond between them and his feelings for her as a person he couldn't doubt, but her body, his need for her was so unexpected and new.

"No… ugh, this is so hard to explain. I don't want to hurt your feelings anymore than I have, but I'm scared if I explain it without editing through it, I'll hurt you even more."

"You're kind of hurting me now." Tears brimmed in her eyes, threatening to spill over.

"Please don't cry. Okay, I find you attractive. In fact, I find you very, very appealing. I keep wondering what you look like beneath all of this." He fiddled with the hem of her shirt. "That's what confuses me and I don't understand why. I've never really been attracted to a woman's body before. Then last night, I saw a little of you and I touched you and it felt amazing. Like I said, you are so small to my hands, whereas I am used to a body that is more my own size. It makes me feel disoriented sometimes and it threw me a bit. Does that make sense to you?"

"Yeah, I understand. You're used to a man's body and how he feels."

"Exactly. So feeling so aroused being with you and by you is utterly unexpected and I just need to sort it out in my head."

Bella looked down, nodding slowly before a smile curled at the corners of her mouth. "But you wonder what I look like?"

"Like you wouldn't believe." Edward snorted, halfway disgusted with his own admission.

Bella took a step back. Her eyes were still wet with tears, but determination radiated from them. She grasped the hem of her shirt decisively pulling it over her head.

"Bella, you don't have to," he murmured, somewhat shocked when he realized what she was doing.

"I think I do. You keep confusing yourself by thinking too much. If you know what I look like, then you don't have to wonder anymore." Slowly, Bella pulled her bunched up pajama pants down, leaving her in only her non-matching and plain bra and panties.

Edward's breathing altered and his heart started pounding heavily.

"Do you still like what you see?"

Edward nodded woodenly. Bella reached behind her and unclasped her bra, revealing her breasts. Edward's eyes stayed on her, looking and studying her body. Hooking her thumbs into her panties dragging them down and leaving herself nude, she seemed to feel somewhat self-conscious. Edward understood that no one had probably ever seen her naked body. Well, no man at least and certainly not one that she kissed several times a day.

Clearly fighting the urge to cover her breasts or her groin, she let Edward just watch her intensely. He was especially enamored with the unsubtle and delicate flare of her hip. The shape was so tender and her thighs looked so incredibly soft.

Lifting his eyes to her, he was relieved that her female shape didn't offend him, not in the least. He knew he didn't need to worry about that when the physical part of their relationship progressed. "You're very beautiful… so delicate," he murmured, letting his eyes drift down her body again. She really was pleasing to the eye. His arousal lurked like a hunter in every cell of his body, ready to consume her.

Bella stepped into his personal comfort zone again, leaving herself vulnerable and absolutely in his trust. He lifted his hands to touch her again. "Are you cold?" he asked, when gooseflesh rose on her arms and thighs.

She giggled sweetly. "That's not exactly my main focus right now."

"Ah," Edward said, before placing his hands on the small of her back. It was clear she was feeling exactly the same way he was - nervous and excited at the same time. "Would you be comfortable getting into bed like this?" he asked carefully. "Nothing has to happen, I swear."

"Shhhhh," she shushed, while offering him comfort as he felt out of sorts with needing and wanting to feel that incredible and soft body next to his. It was like she was a part of him, knowing him to the bone. Bella didn't hesitate to clamber into bed and snuggle into the sheets. Edward quickly pulled his shirt off, while leaving his pajama pants on for good measure.

Without needing to talk about it, they lay down next to each other on their sides. Bella watched his eyes attentively as his hands very softly started to explore her body. He let his fingers skate over her shoulder and ghost down her arm. He felt her tremble a bit when the pads of his fingers caressed her breast. The mound of flesh was slightly drawn towards the mattress and accommodating how Bella was positioned. It looked fascinating.

His fingers continued down over her belly, floating to her hip and outer thigh. He turned his hand, letting his entire palm connect to her warm skin. Bella rolled to her back, probably to give him better access to roam her body. Edward moved closer, resting his head in his one hand.

Under the sheet, his hand continued learning her curves and memorizing her body. He smiled a little when he watched Bella blush at him running his fingers gently through her pubic hairs. He didn't go any lower, just touching her like this was enough for now.

Feeling like he was soaring though the air, Edward couldn't help his curiosity. "Since you're a virgin, have you ever…" he wasn't quite sure how to phrase his rather personal question. Instead, he cupped her breast like last night, nuzzling his thumb over the peaked and rosy nipple.

Bella sighed with delight, as her body clearly responded to his touch. She smiled deviously, while taking her time answering. "I may never have had sex, but I do know how to get myself off." Edward chuckled, before leaning over to kiss her.

"Good to know."

An effortless silence engulfed them when they explored this new form of intimacy. Edward continued to let his hand walk over her body for a long time.

"I'm so in awe of what's in here." He gently tapped the pads of his fingers against her temple. "And because of that…" Edward drew his hand further down her body, while touching her lithely. "This is absolutely enthralling."

oooooOOOOooooo

***clears throat* So Edward got to see the whole package and he likes it… any guesses to what happens next? **

**I can't thank Chartwilightmom and AnnaLund enough for their handholding and constantly boosting my ego. It has decided to take a leave of absence, uncertain of when it will return… unfortunately. Thank you to Dazzled Eyes22 for beta'ing and weeding out all my mistakes.**

**Tomorrow a certain friend pays Bella a visit… dun dun dun**

**See ya.**


	48. Day 24, Thursday, Bella

**Stephenie Meyer created Twilight, I get a kick out of playing with her toys.**

**Thank you for all of your comments and witty thoughts. I truly enjoy them. Let me share the comment that had me gagging on my morning milk.**

_**-So Edward went on a fishing expedition, without dipping his rod in the water? What a brave bunny.**_

_**- Roon0**_

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**Day 24:**

**Thursday**

**Bella**

"Bella! Bella, go into the bathroom and lock the door." Edward's voice was frantic as Bella slowly came awake.

"What?" she croaked, while managing to sit up in bed.

"Someone is trying to beat down the door." She watched Edward drop to his knees and pull a baseball bat out from under the bed. That was when the racket sounded again. It was definitely a hand pounding on the door. Several voices sounded from outside, almost like a choir of boys egging each other on. She recognized the voices.

Edward was already headed out into the hallway when Bella remembered a piece of crucial information she completely forgot pass on. "Stop! Edward, I know who it is." Bella threw the sheets aside, while quickly picking up her pajama pants.

"What?" Edward spat, as he tightened his grip on the baseball bat.

"It's my friends."

"Your friends? It's five in the bloody morning."

Throwing on her shirt and forgoing her underwear, in order to open the door sooner rather than later, she couldn't help but snicker at Edward's completely rumbled look. His hair was sticking out in every direction possible and his boxers peaked over this pajama bottoms.

"Go back to bed. I got this. I'm so sorry. I forgot to tell you that Jacob was coming to visit me."

Edward's eyes widened. "Jacob Black?" he asked following her out into the hallway with the bat clutched in his hand.

"Yeah." That was all that Bella managed to say before she quickly unlocked the door. "Jake!" she squealed when she was immediately tackled by huge arms and hauled into crushing embrace.

"Bells!" Her best friend gushed, as she was submerged in his musky scent.

She took a step back, apprising her oldest friend. "You grew again?" she almost admonished when taking him in. What was he, like seven feet tall now?

"Yeah, I keep telling my dad to stop feeding me steroids, but I guess he sneaks them in anyway. Jesus, you look hot in the morning, Bella."

Bella blushed, quickly averting her gaze to the two boys behind Jacob. "Quil. Embry," she trilled so happy to see her friends from home. "Come on in." Taking in Edward's flabbergasted and somewhat contrite expression, she knew she had some explaining to do. "Let me fix you some breakfast. Edward, can I talk to you alone?"

He nodded.

oooooOOOOooooo

Bella was cracking the eggs into the bowl after having spent a good ten minutes explaining everything to Edward. He had calmed down again. Bella wasn't sure what exactly had him so wound up because it didn't seem to be the fact she had forgotten to tell him about her friends visit.

Edward leaned over her shoulder. She immediately recognized the scent of his body wash. It was mouthwatering. "I'm headed to the office… Early meeting," he excused. Bella frowned, as she knew there was no early meeting. Edward splayed his hand over her stomach, while pulling her body to his in a very public display of affection. "Please, put some underwear on the second I leave because knowing you're not wearing any is driving me insane." His voice was low and intimate as he whispered in her ear. She shivered from the memory of his hands caressing her body last night. Edward's hands had never ventured deeper than simply stroking her breasts, stomach or thighs, but it had still felt so intimate and erotic. How would it feel when they took that next step? Would he want that? Bella had a fairly clear idea of what she wanted. Remembering how it felt to have his erection pressed against her side, and then her stomach as they kissed had been so enticing that it was almost frustrating. She hadn't touched him mainly because she wasn't sure that he was ready for it. Edward seemed much more focused on exploring and familiarizing himself with her body, so she had let him set whatever pace he seemed to want.

Edward's voice yanked her out of her daydream. She suddenly felt entirely too exposed and remembered that she had forgotten her underwear in her rush.

"It was nice meeting you, Jacob. Embry, Quil," he finished before leaving for the label.

Embry and Quil, who both seemed to be starting to nurse a hangover, waved. Jacob almost glowered at Edward as he left.

"So Bells… you finally got laid. I don't think I've ever seen your face that red." Jacob taunted, while leaning over the breakfast bar snatching a piece of bacon. Bella swatted his hand away with the spatula before smiling too sweetly. A catty response to his rude comment bubbled up from her throat. In the past, she would just have blushed and ignored his rudeness, but now, not so much.

"Well, that makes one of us at least. Not that I see how that is any of your business."

Jacob gawked at her, while slowly picking up his unshaved jaw. "And you grew a pair of claws. Kudos." Quil and Embry, who were standing next to him, snickered.

"Well, I had to at some point." Bella shrugged.

"Good for you, I say," Jacob praised. "So Charlie told me about the fire." Bella's oldest friend bringing up that subject felt like beating a dead horse. She didn't want to go there. She still only ever wanted to discuss that topic with one person.

"It was nothing. So what are you going to do today?" Bella inquired, while trying to divert the conversation in another direction.

"Do you mean besides spending the day with my best friend?"

"Jake, I need to go to work, but I promise tonight I will be all yours." Bella caught a strange glance being shared by Quil and Embry. "It's really good to see you, Jacob," Bella said appreciatively.

"You seem so different, Bella," Jacob said quietly, like he was trying to avoid attention from his friends, who had started to tease each other and laughing lightly. "You're shacking up with a guy. What the hell is up with that?"

"Nothing is up with that." Bella's tone was almost defensive. "He offered me a place to stay when I needed it."

"How did you meet him?"

Suddenly, this entire exchange felt a bit like how it would go with Charlie if he knew about the intimacy that had bloomed between Edward and her. "I work for him. Edward is kind of my boss, too."

Jacob's jaw dropped. "I am so getting some strange vibe from him. There just seems to be something off with him." He paused. "Is he gay or something?"

Stunned, Bella placed the spatula beside the frying pan and rubbed her face. Right now, it was a bit unfortunate that her friend knew her so well. It was much easier hiding their affair at work where people knew the new Bella and not the old Bella. Besides, how does she explain that Jacob was sort of hitting the nail right on the head? "Look, Edward's… complicated." She wanted to back that phrase up by saying that she knew what she was doing, but honestly she didn't.

"He'll hurt you," Jacob said quietly after that.

"Jacob, you met him all of five minutes and you're in his house." Bella sighed, looking for words to defend Edward. She had accepted the hurt that might come, but wasn't willing to sit down and wait for the bullet to slam right into her. For now, she was living and it felt good. Normally, she would never take that risk, but seeing her old friend with his familiar face and long black hair made her think of home and how far she had come in a little over three weeks. "Let's eat and hopefully I can be back by five," Bella said, while aiming for some distraction to avoid the subject.

oooooOOOOooooo

After last night with Edward, it was abundantly clear that things were moving ahead between them and that she needed to take precautions. She needed to see a doctor or more specifically, a gynecologist. While googling doctors, she found one not too far from Edward's house.

"Good morning, Angela," Bella said and closed the browser.

"Good morning." Angela answered, after setting her purse down under her desk. "You look all happy this morning." Bella only smiled in response, not really interested in going into the whole friend from back home and staying with Edward debacle. That would be a conversation where she wouldn't have a leg to stand on.

"Bella, can I talk to your for a sec?" Mike's voice came from beside her. Bella peeked up from her computer screen. "Er… alone, please."

Before Bella got up, she caught a curious glance from Angela. "Sure." She followed Mike to the copy room where he started to clear his throat somewhat anxiously.

"I was thinking, er…" Mike cleared his throat once more. "I was er… perhaps. Whew, Newton just spit it out," he muttered to himself. "Would you like to go out with me? I mean, we could go to dinner, perhaps do something fun afterwards, if you'd like?"

Bella stared a little wide-eyed before it dawned on her that perhaps this wasn't just a night of two friends hanging out. This was potentially another complication at work.

"Excuse me, Isabella… Mike." Edward's voice was icily polite, as he squeezed past them.

Oh no.

Why did everything have to be so complicated today? First, there's Jacob and now this.

Bella watched Edward snatch a few sheets from the printer, before making his way back to his office and soundly closing the door behind him.

Bella closed her eyes for a moment, while taking a deep breath. Sure, coming out of her shell was all well and good, but she never had to deal with these awkward situations in her old life. Besides that, she could feel Edward's eyes bore into the back of her neck from a distance.

"Mike, I don't think that would be such a good idea. I'm sort of already seeing someone," Bella hedged, while trying not to sound like a teenager. "I mean… I'm flattered…" She was about to throw in an excuse about not dating anyone from work, but that just felt like betrayal.

"Oh," Mike answered, sounding clearly disappointed. "Well, he's a lucky bastard." He smiled his all American smile, shrugging it off. He really was a nice guy.

Going back to her workspace, she had no doubt the call from Edward's office would come immediately and it did.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Wonder what Edward will say?**

**So many conversations to have and so little time – Jacob, Mike and Edward… boys! *Evil smirks***

**Hugs and kisses to Chartwilightmom and AnnaLund for pre-reading. Thanks to Dazzled Eyes22 for Betaing.**

**More Jake tomorrow. **

**XOXO**


	49. Day 24, Thursday, Edward

**After a long and enlightening discussion with AnnaLund today, it is with very different eyes that I write this disclaimer. Stephenie Meyer owns, I do not… but I own the freaking plot. LMAO.**

**Thank you for all of your comments and thoughts on yesterday's chapter. Do you all read each other's comments, because most of you said: 'When it rains, it pours.' Funny, but yes, ladies, you are right. I'm in awe that you took me past 900 reviews. **

**For Lizzard43, when you make it this far, thank you for commenting on every single chapter. I'm impressed. **

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**Day 24:**

**Thursday**

**Edward**

Bella sat down in the chair opposite from Edward after having closed the door on her own accord. He wasn't sure if he was angry, irritated, or jealous. He didn't even know what the hell was going on. Perhaps, it was just the abrupt 5 am morning wake-up call that had him start the day on the wrong foot, but he was definitely in a foul mood.

"Look, Edward. I'm sorry about Jacob. I should have remembered to tell you that he was coming."

Edward gestured with his hand by waving her off.

"I'm no good at this," he blurted. Bella's eyes widened alarmingly. Okay, now he sounded like he was breaking up with her… or could they break up? Were they dating? He was still as confused as he had been since the day he met her. He screwed his eyes tightly shut. "Uh, it seems like I have some competition." He ran his fingers over the keyboard of his computer nervously. "Can I ask what you answered Mike?"

Bella frowned at him like what he just asked was in Russian. "I told him, 'no thank you'," Bella answered quietly. She took a deep breath. "You seem to be under the impression that Mike asking me out is none of your business?" she asked, looking confused.

Edward nodded, feeling his gut doing a somersault. "I haven't made you any promises," he answered quietly.

"Edward, I stay at your house. We have dinner together every night and most importantly, I sleep in your bed. I think that entitles you to know what is going on in my life and if another man asks me out. I just thought… that you'd expect to know things like that."

"I do," Edward rushed to answer, as a small smile quirked at the corners of his mouth. "I wasn't sure what you expected, though. Most of what I really want to do is kick Mike in the balls, but I guess I can't really blame him for wanting a shot to be with you."

Bella smiled sweetly in response and her eyes twinkled with amusement. "Let's just leave Mike's balls out of this. I'm not interested in him… not at all."

Edward kept fiddling with the keyboard and running his long skilled fingers over the letters. "What about Jacob Black?"

Bella's brows shot skyward. "What about Jake?"

"Are you interested in him?" Jeez, Edward's voice was so small and he felt so much like a petulant teenager. He never used to have difficulties voicing his opinions and here he was at his company, nonetheless, feeling like a fifteen years old going out on his first date and knowing his father had to drive. All he needed was to break out on a cold sweat. Great… now that too, he thought when his palms got clammy.

Why was this so strange? He was usually able to talk to Bella about everything.

Bella started spluttering, like she was choking on a drink. "Edward, he's my best friend. Trust me, Jacob and I are not remotely romantic."

"You kissed…" The sentence drifted into silence.

"No, I tried to kiss him when I was eighteen and that didn't exactly make him all warm and fussy, remember?"

Of course, Edward remembered Bella telling him that. "So you can honestly say there's nothing between you two?" he asked, feeling his nerves run amuck.

"Hands on the bible, there are absolutely no feelings between Jacob Black and me, besides friendship," Bella answered soberly.

Edward nodded slowly, accepting her declaration, even though he had definitely seen Jacob Black checking out Bella like he knew her underwear was still on his bedroom floor. However, Edward left the subject alone. "Fine. They can have the spare bedroom," Edward said avoiding the brewing dispute. He wasn't going to split hairs over something Bella was oblivious too. It wouldn't be a fair fight. "How long are they staying?"

"Just until tomorrow night. They are on a road trip and only passing through L.A. to see me. Jacob just finished the Rabbit… I mean his car."

"Okay. Fine." Edward wasn't exactly thrilled about having the man who discreetly disrobed Bella, when he thought no one was looking, at his house, but the alternative of her staying with him at some hotel room was far less attractive. He could suck it up for one night and he could keep an eye on things in his house. He suddenly felt so… protective of her. He knew Bella was hardly some damsel in distress, but he wanted to be close by, just in case.

Instead of sounding like a broken record, Edward changed the subject. "Kim Maddi will be here in about fifteen minutes. I'd like you to be at the meeting. I have a feeling her father really took to you the other night and I want to bring that girl into the fold. So will you sit in please?" Edward went straight back to business, instead of losing more focus because of his flustered emotions. He was already doing that enough lately.

"You sure you want me there?" Bella asked, though her gaze peaked with excitement.

"Of course. Now, will you excuse me for a moment? I need to make a few phone calls," Edward asked kindly.

Bella nodded. "I'll get the conference room set up and get ready." Her tone was more formal than it was at home. Edward wasn't sure he liked it, but he knew Bella would walk through fire to avoid their affair getting out at their place of work. So far, her politically correct behavior at work made him ache to go home, where they were just Bella and Edward and not boss and the boss' assistant's assistant.

"Thank you, sweetie." The term of endearment simply popped out of his mouth. He pressed his lips together.

Bella smirked at him. "You know under different circumstances that little comment would border on gross moral turpitude, but I'll let it slide for now."

Edward laughed. "No fraternization in the office then?"

Bella pursed her lips, while her gaze twinkling with mirth. "Nope, I'm not that kind of girl. Oh, I forgot to mention I'll be out tonight. I'll be doing some sightseeing with the boys," Bella said as she left Edward's office. With that, a large boulder of jealousy was just lodged right into his gut again. He wanted to go with her and protect her, but he also knew he shouldn't crowd her. Bella didn't deserve to have him go all possessive on her just because he was insecure.

When the door closed again, Edward pulled up his father's phone number to ask for a favor. Based on last night and studiously ignoring that wretched jealousy floating around in his belly, he knew precautions needed to be made when his relationship with Bella was moving forward. He wanted to get tested, simply for good measure.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Any thought on jealous Edward?**

**Thank you to Chartwilightmom and AnnaLund for been too cool for words. Kisses for my beta Dazzled Eyes22.**

**Tomorrow… **


	50. Day 25, Friday, Bella

**Plot's mine… characters are Stephenie's**

**The vote is unanimous, jealous Edward makes you all swoon and pant. LOL. Thank you so much for all your wonderful comments; they bring me so much joy.**

**Now, Jake is in for a scolding.**

oooooOOOOooooo

**Day 25:**

**Friday**

**Bella**

"I had so much fun last night. Thank you for coming to see me, Jake," Bella said quietly when he was giving her a thorough hug goodbye. She actually missed her friend's humor, warmth and musky scent.

They had had so much fun last night. After taking one of those tours-buses around Hollywood showing the rich and famous' houses, they'd spent most of the evening at some rundown gaming arcade laughing so hard their stomachs hurt. Quil and Embry had kicked their asses at most of the games they played, mostly because Bella sucked at any kind of sporting or computer game. Jacob never once complained, but never missed the opportunity to taunt her usual klutzy and severe lack of coordination.

"It was really good to see you, Bella. Don't be a stranger, come home to Forks and see us once in a while, okay?"

"I wouldn't dare." She pulled back, while craning her neck back to look up into his dark eyes and tawny skinned face. She missed that face. "Have a safe trip, Jake." She put her hand to his cheek, feeling that he was in a severe need of a shave.

"I will."

Before she registered what was really happening, a warm pressure of Jacob's lips was against hers. He was freaking kissing her!

Since she was stunned more than anything, it took her a moment to react. That moment may have seemed like acceptance because Jacob's lips became a little more demanding. This time, it was her turn to take that huge step back and hold up her hands. "Whoa, Jacob. We're just friends," Bella gasped.

Jake quirked a brow at her, while touching his mouth with his fingers. "Ouch, that hurt, but I guess I deserved that one."

A small laugh bubbled up through Bella's throat. So he remembered that heinous kissing episode. "I didn't mean to throw that back in your face. I swear I didn't…"

Jacob's hands floated lower, but stayed on her body, resting on her back a little too intimately. "It's okay." His head drifted lower again, once more aiming to kiss her, but this time Bella saw it coming from a mile away. She stepped out of his personal space immediately and dodged the next kiss.

"Jake, don't do this," Bella begged a little flustered that he was coming on to her like this. "Edward…" she muttered as an explanation of her refusal. She wouldn't and couldn't let this happen.

He looked at her confused for a moment. "You may not want to accept it, but it's clear as day. It's not like it's a real relationship with him," Jacob said quietly.

Bella frowned, as a small crease formed between her brows. "It's as real as anybody else's." she defended. The tension in her belly began turning a bit sour.

"That's a joke. The guy is gay…"

"Are your grapes really that sour? It's not any of your business," Bella scoffed. Yesterday, she had reluctantly confessed to Jacob that in the past, Edward had solely been dating men. The conversation happened when they had a beer at the breakfast bar after returning home. Quil and Embry had already zonked out and Edward had gone to a concert for a few hours, so they had been left alone. Bella hadn't given out details, just the cliff notes.

"My relationship with Edward is not a joke. How dare you, Jacob?"

Her friend's mouth popped open.

"I'm not some naïve little girl and I'm definitely not timid little Bella that shies away from every obstacle that may seem scary. You have no right to stand in his home and mock the relationship that we have. Yes, it seems lopsided and deranged in many ways, but that is not your concern." Bella's tone was decisive. No one was going to judge what she and Edward were. Yes, she clearly saw all the warning signs. However, that hardly made it Jacob's right to put what they had under his heel and decide what he wanted had a right to override she wanted. Bella had chosen with her eyes open, fully knowing the obstacles may lie ahead.

"Okay, I'm sorry." Jacob grinned. That only pissed her off more, so instead of accepting his half-assed apology, Bella glowered at him. Jacob's eyes widened. "I'm really sorry, okay? Jeez, you're scaring me, Bells."

"Well, you should be." She sighed. "At least, you should be respectful to my choices and wishes in life. I made them knowing full well what I'm getting myself into."

"Put a guy in his place, would you?" Jacob laughed, while pulling a protesting Bella into his embrace. However, this time, his arms around her were teasing and not insisting. He hugged her and Bella relaxed in his arms. "You know, for all it's worth, I'm so glad you learned to stand up for yourself."

"Thanks, Jake," Bella muttered, knowing that in the past that hadn't been her forte. Over the years, many people had disregarded her opinion because she had found it so hard to open her mouth and speak up.

When Jacob let her go, he kissed her forehead, like he had done for years. "Take care, you. Don't let the bastards get you down."

A somewhat hysterical giggle escaped Bella's throat. "I can believe you're quoting the valedictorian speech from The O.C.," she scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"For your information, Taylor is hot, but I meant it. Don't let the bastards get you down. Keep that chin up and do what you're doing. It suits you. It really does."

Someone outside honked their horn for an obscene amount of time. It could only be Quil and Embry losing their patience.

"Bye, Jacob," Bella said with some degree of melancholy.

"Yeah. See you soon. Maybe you'll come home for Christmas?"

"Maybe," Bella acquiesced.

At the sound of the door closing, Bella took a few moments to center herself. She needed to tell Edward about that kiss and she was late for her doctor's appointment.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Bella with claws, you like or not?**

**My opinion of Canon-Jacob is that I like him, but I NEVER viewed him as a love interest, but merely a friend. I was annoyed that I needed that shoved down my throat in the books. What is your opinion of Canon-Jacob and that he thinks Bella is all that?**

**Thank you to the wonderful Chartwilightmom and the adorable AnnaLund for pre-reading. Dazzled Eyes22 used her wicked skill and patience weeding out my mistakes.**


	51. Day 25, Friday, Edward

**My plot, Stephenie's characters. **

**I'm so sorry I didn't manage to respond to your lovely and amazing reviews today, but that doesn't mean that I don't treasure every single one of them. **

**I am so surprised to see that most of you agree with my views on Jake; he's an awesome friend, but that all he should have been. LOL**

**More Edward and Bella for those of you who missed them yesterday.**

oooooOOOOooooo

**Day 25:**

**Friday**

**Edward**

The two men in front of them were like a vision of Edward from no more than a few weeks ago. Edward's arm that was around Bella's shoulder was tense. The darkness in the park didn't cloak the unasked questions that were clearly tumbling around in Edward's head. For a while, they silently watched the two men who were tossing a basketball around.

"I need to tell you something," Bella said quietly after a moment. Edward shifted his gaze, looking down at her expectantly. "Jacob kissed me today." It almost felt like his heart stilled in his chest. He knew it! "Nothing else happened and I didn't kiss him back," Bella said soberly, while staring at him with large compassionate eyes.

"Thank you for telling me," Edward answered after a few beats of silence. Knowing that black haired man had put his mouth on her made it hard for Edward to restrain the rage that was aching in his chest. He never used to be jealous, but in the past his lover hardly needed protection of any kind. With Bella, it was different.

She blinked rapidly. "Are you mad at me?"

Edward smiled softly. "No, well, I'm not angry at you… Jacob however…" He didn't bother to finish the statement. It seemed redundant now that the black haired man had left.

"If it's any consolation I did tell him never to do that again, not in those specific words, though."

Edward sighed. That actually did make him feel better. "Thanks, Bella."

The sound of the bouncing basketball on the court slowing down was fairly telling. It happened when the men became more interested in each other than their game. Edward's attention focused on two men who had their fingers twined at their hips. One stole a swift kiss, before teasing his date or lover by ducking out of the way right when he leaned in for more. They both laughed as they started to play fight. The man cheated out of his kiss was adamant to get what he wanted and he did. A loud, openmouthed wet kiss.

Edward was acutely aware that Bella had said nothing and he let her watch the show play out. The man, who clearly won the battle, gloated before he picked up the ball and the game continued.

"Does it truly not bother you?" Edward finally asked when his body felt like cement that was drying. The tension was skyrocketing.

"Does what bother me?" Bella asked and turned away from the basketball players.

"That it could very easily have been me out on that court. It normally _would_ be me."

Bella frowned, looking like she didn't really get the gist of his question. "You play basketball?" she cocked a brow and Edward rolled his eyes. Bella smiled sweetly. "I know it could have been you, Edward, but I think the question is would you still want it to be you?"

Edward gazed at her gravely. "I think it will always be a part of me. Who I am and have been for so long won't just go away."

Bella laced their fingers together and placed them on his thigh. "I would never expect that part of you to just disappear. I know who you are, Edward. It doesn't matter to me who you used to be with."

Edward snorted. "Are you honestly telling me that you don't care that I slept with men for most of my adult life? That I enjoy sleeping with men more than women, present company excluded, of course."

"Yes. That's what I'm telling you. Don't paint yourself to be the bad guy. You're not a monster." Bella paused. "Did you ever hurt anyone?"

Edward's brows shot up confused by her blunt question. "You mean sexually?" He choked out.

"Yes."

"Of course not. I would never…" Edward answered sounding appalled.

"See, that's what I mean. You were with men whom you chose to be with and who wanted to be with you. Where's the crime in that? That's what I mean. You're not a monster and I'm not some clueless girl that you're leading down some dark and dangerous path. I may not have a whole lot of experience sexually, but I can still trust my own feelings. I don't care about your past and it doesn't bother me that you're turned on my men, but what worries me is that I won't be enough for you." At the end of that sentence, her voice drifted to barely a whisper. Her gaze drifted down to their fingers.

"You're a funny one," Edward murmured, pulling Bella closer and placing his cheek on the top of her head. Once more, she just proved just how much she was able to amaze him.

"Funny as in peculiar or funny, ha ha?" she looked up at him. Her brown eyes were suddenly so vulnerable.

"Peculiar. I think most people would focus on their distaste of two men together, whereas you focus on not being enough, which by the way is totally irrational."

"It's not irrational. When we go all the way, you may figure out that you need what I can't give you. So in that case, what truly is irrational in this conversation is whether or not I find two men together distasteful."

"When we go all the way?" Edward asked carefully.

"Yeah. I mean… I want to, don't you?" Bella peeked up at him. Her eyes were bottomless pools of insecurity.

Edward's smile was boyish and almost cheeky. "Yeah, I want to. I feel like such a teenager because lately I can't seem to think about anything other than getting into your panties."

Bella giggled, while huddling herself closer to him. He felt her chest swell as she pulled in a large breath like she was nervous. "Good because I went to see a gynecologist today. I had a shot of Depo-Provera."

Edward's mouth fell open with surprise. "Birth control?" Bella nodded in affirmation.

"I figured it was better to be safe than sorry," she answered quietly.

"Good thinking." He paused for a moment, knowing this was pretty monumental between them. They had both been preparing for what they wanted and knew was coming. "I guess that's the same reason I got STD tested yesterday," Edward answered, while looking Bella straight in the eye. The honesty shared between them was disarming. Bella's eyes, however, turned wary. That was understandable. "I've never been careless. I never had unprotected sex, but I couldn't live with the consequence if by chances I had caught a bug anyway." His heart was suddenly like a jackhammer in his chest. This wasn't exactly an easy topic to tackle.

"Thank you for doing that," Bella answered moments later. Then her eyes turned undeniable curious. "Edward? Can I ask you something?"

"Anything, love."

Bella smiled so sweetly at him. He would never tire of that smile that left him so defenseless.

"When you've had sex in the past…" she paused clearly not sure how to phrase her curiosity. "Who was…" she paused, bit her lip then opened her mouth and closed it a few times. "Did you… take turns…" she hedged, close to giving up. Her face was suddenly burning with heat. Edward chuckled lightly. It was so clear what she was getting at, but he wasn't sure how to put it into words either. He really didn't want to offend her. Bella sighed, feeling frustrated. "Can you just explain the process to me in detail? I'm really curious about the how."

"You want me to explain gay sex?" he asked incredulously.

She nodded vigorously and her cheeks were searing red. "When I think about it, there's just too much equipment."

Edward couldn't help smirking. This was rather entertaining, though a little intimidating. "Well, there's always your hands and mouth. That's pretty self-explanatory. Most guys do anal… but not everyone." He paused, while still keeping eye contact with her. One huge question was in Bella's eyes now. "No, I usually don't bottom. I've tried it, but I don't tend to swing that way."

Bella's forehead creased, as her confusion was splayed all over her face. "Bottom?"

"Yeah… Bottom…" he dragged the word out as he repeated it, waiting for her to put two and two together.

"Oh! So basically, you've been the one doing '_the work'._" Bella awkwardly made quotation marks with her hand was still locked with Edward's.

Edward laughed. "You're adorable. I never had to explain this in so much detail before, but yes, I usually am the top… or was. Bottoming was never really my thing, but it's different for every person. It's a preference when it comes to anal because bottoming is intense and not for everyone. I guess that's no different no matter the sex of your partner. It's about choice, I guess."

"See Edward," Bella's tone was gleeful. "That's why I don't care who you have been with. It was your choice. So when you choose something, who am I do dispute that? It's my choice to be with you, to sit here and have this conversation with you. That's what life is. Choices."

Edward lifted his hands, before opening and studying his fingers as Bella's palms stayed resting willingly on his. It was a test. He coiled his fingers into hers again. "I choose you," he whispered into her ear.

oooooOOOOooooo

***Clears throat* **

**Still with me? What do you think? Please, hit that review button.**

**As always Chartwilightmom and AnnaLund pre-read and Dazzled Eyes22 betaed. Thank you lovelies.**

**Tomorrow is a chapter I've been looking forward to sharing with you.**


	52. Day 26, Saturday, Bella and Edward

**Enjoy…**

**oooooOOOOooooo**

**Day 26:**

**Saturday**

**Bella**

Bella pulled back, while trying to catch her breath. Edward released her mouth, but continued his path of worshipping her skin from her cheek, over her jaw and down her neck. Finding the courage she'd had to lean on so many times now, she didn't want to let this chance surpass her.

"Can we… not stop tonight?" The words almost got caught in her throat. Edward immediately stopped kissing her neck. He pulled back, but stayed where he was, hovering over her where they were lying on the couch.

Edward swallowed almost convulsively with his Adam's apple bobbing up and down in his throat. His lower lip quivered just a bit. "Are you ready for that?"

Bella nodded feverishly. She had no doubts. Somehow that dormant part of her where she never really felt the desire to be intimate with anybody had been roused and was now taking deep purposeful breaths soaring through the sensation of yearning. She wanted the experience of making love and there was only one person in the world she trusted with this and he was staring down at her with huge and intense green eyes.

Gently, she ran her hands into his already chaotic hair. Her hands had been finding purpose there several times over the past hour. "Are you?" she echoed his question. What they had weren't just about her, but both of them. She was vulnerable and inexperienced, but so was Edward.

"I think I am," he answered soberly. Edward moved in, placing a soft chaste kiss on her lips. "Let's go to bed."

Bella's breath got caught in her throat and her heart was hammering out of her chest at his words.

Bella lost herself in Edward's soft eyes, as his fingers slid underneath the hem of her shirt. Her breath hitched when his hands almost left a scorching trail down her ribcage. It felt exactly like those tongues of flames dragging heat over her skin like it happened the first times she met Edward. He then slowly pulled her shirt over her head. Edward's mouth reached her collarbone, sliding slowly down to nip at the strap of her bra. She shivered as she started moving her hands up to the top button of his shirt. This was a momentous leap for both of them. They repeated the process until there was nothing left to remove, but their underwear.

The sheets felt cool as they crawled in. Bella watched Edward lie down on his side and rest his head in his hand. He had a habit of doing that. Bella couldn't help but notice Edward's trembling breath. "Are you as nervous as I am?" she asked, while carefully crawling up next to him.

Edward laughed shortly. The sound was anxious. "Probably more."

"I'm glad we're in the same boat then," she murmured and pulled his lips down to hers again. Their kiss was deep and thorough, while letting excitement resound in every cell of their bodies. In the middle of it all, the mood seemed to change from serious to nervous, by the anxiety tumbling through them both. A snicker bloomed through the kiss and they found themselves to be laughing suddenly, a heartfelt giddy laugh that made the mood so much lighter.

"I think we just have to realize there's no guidebook to this," Bella said through her snickers.

"Yeah?" Edward cocked a brow, looking very relieved. A playful gleam showed in his eyes. "Then just let me fumble you out of this then?" Swiftly, he sat back and grasped her legs, crossing them to flip her over. Bella squealed with delight when she tumbled over, landing on her stomach. She was elated to feel her form being enveloped by his body warmth when he leaned over her and put some of his weight on her. His hands were swiftly working the closure.

"That wasn't fumbling. That was rather elegant. I've been wearing a bra for most of ten years now and I can't get rid of it that quickly." She was resting her weight on her elbows, making it easier for Edward to dispose of the garment completely.

"Well, our intensions are hardly the same," he murmured in her ear, while cupping her breasts from behind. It was hard to believe that he had no practice seducing a woman when he was so good at it. Bella was mentally flailing, as a light and almost dizzy feeling invaded her body. This was all new to her. His touch stirred up a whole new world of emotions and made her feel desired. She felt his warm mouth and wet tongue starting to map out her neck and shoulders. "Your skin is flawless, perfect." He paused for a moment. "I want you so much, Isabella."

His words send waves of heat down below.

"I want you, too." She practically panted. "Desperately."

With his help, she wiggled around in his arms again, so they were facing each other. Both sets of hands went exploring, though Bella didn't quite have the courage to touch him below the waist… just yet. Edward seemed to have the same problem. His mouth was everywhere on her and caressing her lips, cheeks, neck, shoulders and breasts, but his hands wouldn't cross the invisible line below her navel.

So instead of focusing on what she wanted, she focused on what Edward seemed to need, a little help. Twining their fingers together, she brought their joined hands down to the junction of her thighs. His eyes opened when his fingers lithely ran over her panties.

"You can touch me. Don't be scared."

"Sometimes, you understand what I want and need better than I do. You're definitely better at going for it." They kissed lightly as Edward's fingers sinuously explored the shape of her. His eyes became somewhat distant, before they closed and his kiss turned searing hot.

"What are you thinking?" Bella asked, while trying to catch her breath. It was clear his mind was working furiously on something. She just couldn't decipher it.

Edward gnawed his bottom lip for a moment after he pulled back. "I'm thinking that I want to kiss you here." Bella almost blushed to her scalp when she felt him add pressure with his fingers right between her thighs.

"Okay," Bella murmured, squirming at the thought of it. What would that feel like? Something so intimate was a bit daunting, but she trusted Edward. That trust left a bit of excitement in its wake. She noticed she actually wanted his mouth down south. The curiosity of his lips on hers down there erased any possible worry that she might have.

Edward stole a deep kiss and their tongues began swirling around each other. "Just to warn you, I have absolutely no clue what I'm doing," Edward said and Bella giggled. She loved the vulnerability he was willing to show her. It matched hers.

However, she was curious to know more. Had she misunderstood him? "You have been with women before, right?" she asked gently.

Edward nodded. "I have. Let's just say that was like a decade ago and it was hardly your garden-variety experience focused on pleasing your partner. It was pretty basic. So… this will be a first for me." His shy smile was absolutely endearing.

"Well, I have no clue how it's supposed to feel. So I guess we'll take it from there."

"You won't be disappointed when I suck at it?" Edward's brows shot up and he groaned. "Sorry about my choice of words."

Bella giggled. "Very apt, but I would never be disappointed in you."

On his way south, Edward lavished attention on her breasts, one at a time… several times. "I've really grown a fascination with these," he mumbled, while pulling on one of the peaks with his teeth being a little less than gentle.

Bella moaned in response, as the sensation rushed to where Edward was headed.

**Edward**

Sitting back, he hooked his fingers into her panties. He watched the dark fringe of hair appear as he pulled the fabric away and exposed her. He never touched her here before, unless you counted how he merely teased her a bit a few nights before.

Bella's cheeks were painted a luscious red, but she smiled at him, glowing with anticipation.

God, he was so nervous.

Placing his hands above her knees, he let them slide up her thighs, until she relaxed and parted her legs of her own will for him. He watched curiously as she was slowly unveiled for him. Her skin was a luxurious pink, behind the sparse line of hairs.

For the first time ever, he wanted a woman like this. He wanted her in his mouth. He wanted to explore the secret folds that looked so delicate as they came into view.

Unceremoniously, he placed himself on his stomach and crawled in between her legs. The aroma from her was gently wafting past his nose. It was floral, delicate and so different from what he knew. "Your scent is incredible."

Not really sure how to go about it, Edward figured it couldn't be that much different than kissing. It was his mouth to her skin, her very sensitive skin.

Besides that, she knew him and if he really was bad at it, Bella would never blame him for it anymore than he would fault her for being mediocre when trying something new. He would only have to try again at some point, while hoping to learn the skill of going down on her and properly making her bells ring.

He started to place small and careful kisses on her inner thighs, and it didn't take long before Edward felt her skin start to heat. Grazing his thumb down her swollen lips, he spread her carefully and delved in deeper with his mouth.

Bella answered with a low throaty moan.

He used the tip of his tongue to explore the soft folds, while every now and again returning to the very front where her clit seemed to get increasingly hard.

The sweet taste of her was sensational.

Moving his hands, he grasped her hips and practically glued his mouth to her. He let her increasingly intense moans guide him. Feeling every writhe and twitch of her hips, Edward couldn't escape the idea that just maybe, he really was okay at this and that he possibly was able to make her climax at his very first try at pleasing her. God, he was enthralled by the possibility. With his tongue, he kept stimulating the peak by licking, teasing and very carefully nipping with his teeth a few times. Her hands locked into his hair, pushing his face harder into her.

"Don't stop, Edward," Bella gasped. "Whatever you do, _do not stop_."

That wasn't even a possibility.

Changing tactics, he carefully sucked some of her into his mouth. He was rewarded with a loud groan. So he did it again… and again.

"I'm getting so dizzy," she mumbled between heavy breaths. "Fingers…" she muttered, and then something else unintelligible followed. It took a few moments to grasp what she was hinting at. He could use more than just his mouth to entice her.

Quickly sucking his middle finger, wanting to make sure nothing was uncomfortable, he put his mouth back on her when her moaning turned to longing whimpers. Carefully Edward pushed a slick finger inside of her.

Absolutely amazed that she was so smooth on the outside, he was astounded that she was even softer on the inside. He was trying to work everything in sync by teasing her with his tongue and pumping his fingers. Bella's body seemed to respond to everything he offered.

This was easier than expected.

"Oh, Edward." Her voice was a soft mewl calling his name. "Keep going, just keep going and you'll make me cum." Edward almost swelled with pride at her praise and encouragement. God, he hoped he could make her topple over the edge. "I'm almost there," she whispered.

Her support and her appreciation made him realize how much he longed for some friction of his own. His throbbing erection, which was caught between his body and the mattress, was screaming for some attention. He was still wearing his boxers and couldn't help but squirm into the bed seeking some relief.

While returning his focus to Bella, he noticed that her body was practically pulsating… well, literally vibrating in his mouth and around his fingers. This was it.

Her hands were trapped in his hair and fisted around his locks to the point of pain. She was almost quiet as she climaxed, just panting and fighting for air, but Edward had no doubt that she peaked. His fingers were coated with the evidence and she was suddenly so sensitive that she yanked his mouth from her quite abruptly.

Taking in how she was lying so trustingly on his bed, Edward savored every inch of her. She was absolutely stunning. He peppered her soft stomach with small kisses, while listening to her pants slowly subsiding as she was coming down from her high.

Slowly, she opened her eyes. Her pupils were huge and her normally pale and flawless skin was splotchy with heat. They looked at each other and a huge grin spreading on both their faces.

Bella cupped his face, while tracing her thumb over his bottom lip. "God, you're amazing. Your hands on me are like magic."

**Bella**

"Magic, huh?" Edward teased. His entire hand connected with flare of her hip, while holding her body to his. "I think I need to correct that. How you feel and taste, that's what magic. You're so soft and it's absolutely enthralling. You're so beautiful."

All of Edward's sweet words were so sincere and disarming, but there was one small part of what he said that captured her attention, taste. What did she taste like, she wondered?

Bella lifted her head and swept the tip of her tongue over his lower lip, picking up what residue of herself that she could. "So that's what I taste like," she mused quietly, lithely running her tongue against the roof of her mouth. It was sweet with a hint of salt.

Edward's mouth fell slightly open. "You are so sexy, you know that?" Bella just stared, blinking. Sexy? Her? Not likely. She chose not to answer when the man who made Adonis hide in shame of his looks had just gone down on her.

Bella felt like jelly as they started kissing again and their limbs grinded and pushed against each other. Her hands were still exploring his back and feeling the lines of his muscles and small birthmarks. She could feel him strong and hard against her stomach. She wanted to feel him and feel that strength underneath her fingers. She wanted to hold him in her palm and learn how to please him just as he had done her, but her nerves still won over her curiosity. She wanted to be just as selfless… but mostly, she wanted to learn what Edward felt like… all of him.

A few times, she dared to let her hands drift as far as his behind, cupping the shape, and when she did that he pushed himself more firmly against her stomach.

With every touch of his hand to her skin, Bella's desperation to touch him seemed to skyrocket. She finally summoned up her courage to move on because being with Edward was not supposed to be done halfway.

"Edward… could you…" she paused, while trying to regain her breath and courage to speak up. "Will you show me how… er, I'm not clueless, but you were so good at touching me that it makes me… I just have no clue how to make it good for you." Bella frowned, feeling so helpless.

His answering smile was sweet and adoring. "Of course," he whispered, like it was the most natural thing in the world for her to ask for help. Gently, he kissed the tip of her nose, before he ridded himself of his boxers. She didn't look down yet.

Bella's heart was pounding heavily as nerves and excitement mixed. Her current problem was that Edward had been so open and honest about never giving that kind of pleasure before, but still he had been like an expert when it came down to it.

Edward's weight shifted as he lay down beside her. "Give me your hand," he said quietly. His gaze was incredibly soft, yet still lingering on her. It was like he had a direct line straight into her soul.

Trusting him completely, she placed her hand in his before she looked down and gaped at him.

Was he really that big? Bigger than what was normal? She had no clue, but compared to her body right now, he certainly seemed huge. Suddenly, her nerves shocked the muscles down south and they clenched hard. The feeling was double edged, expectation on one side and terror on the other. Besides that, he was completely shaved. There were no hairs and the skin was smooth around his groin. That was unexpected.

"Ask whatever you want?" Edward whispered intimately in her ear. The gentle pressure of his mouth to the nape of her neck made her relax and she realized her hand was frozen, hovering midair. "Relax," he murmured, while giving her hand a small encouraging squeeze.

Finally, she was able to move.

She gently ran her fingers up the rigid shaft. Edward's breath fluttered and Bella looked up at his face. "The shaving, is that a gay thing?" Her voice sounded so small.

Edward shook his head, looking like the epitome of patience. "No. Well, not for me. I just prefer to keep myself that way."

Bella looked down at her hand carefully familiarizing herself with this new aspect of intimacy between them. Deep down, she knew that she didn't want this night to become some half-assed failed attempt to have sex. No, she was doing this and she was going in with all guns blazing. She wanted to ravish that ache in the pit of her body, follow it and see where it took her. The feeling was almost… intoxicating, like Edward had said. It was enthralling.

Bella leaned in to kiss him. The kiss was thorough and it reignited that fire Edward had brought to life inside of her when he so easily made her orgasm. Using her body, she pushed him to his back. It was her turn now.

Sitting on her knees beside him, she took a brief moment to really appreciate all of him. He was so lean and proportioned like a Greek god… minus the understatement of his privates like those old statues. There he was god-like too.

"You're looking at me like you want to devour me." His voice was like a breath of air.

Bella's entire body was pulsating and trembling with a sudden power she hadn't expected. If she could only make him feel half of the way he made her feel, then it was worth a shot. "I kind of do," she answered sounding more confident than she actually felt. Edward's answering smile was small, but deviously pleased. That was easy to tell.

Capturing his mouth again, Bella knew he took cues from her. He followed her pace, her want and her need. Taking her hand, he folded her fingers around his erection. Placing his hand over hers, he started stroking slowly. "Like this," he whispered. Bella followed his guiding movements.

Edward's breathing changed and moments later, he let go of her hand.

Doing what he showed her, she kept a pace of stroking and caressing him until she felt more assertive. Suddenly, there was no fear, no worry and no nerves. All she felt was empowered, desperate to have him closer and to please him.

Breaking their kiss, her mouth drifted over his jaw taking small bites as she went. His smooth marble like skin was satin against her tongue. She moved to his shoulder, then south to his nipple. The small peak was tight against her lips. The planes of his stomach were gentle ripples of muscles that she kissed on her way over the skin and pass his navel. As she mapped out his body with her mouth, she kept teasing him slowly with her hand as best as she could. She sat up on her knees, while looking at her hand wrapped around him.

Ducking down, she opened her mouth when suddenly Edward's hands cupped her face. "Hey, you really don't have to…" His eyes were wide as saucers and he looked completely panic stricken.

Bella almost felt hurt and insulted. "You don't want me to?" Her voice sounded strangled.

"Don't get me wrong. Yeah, I do, but this is your first time. Just take it slow, okay?"

"What if I said that I wanted to try?" Her lower lip was trembling from the nerves tumbling through her body again. "I know I won't be any good at it, but…" she hesitated, biting her lip.

"But what?" Edward asked earnestly.

"I just want try. I'm not some adolescent or confused teenager. I'm very well aware that I have absolutely no experience, by choice, but with you… this is so exciting for me. I want this. I want you…and I want the whole package, so to speak. This is a part of it." Bella fused her mouth shut, when she felt like she was rambling and her verbal filter malfunctioning.

"Trust me. You don't have to beg." Edward smirked. Bella narrowed her eyes at him and he quickly straightened his face. "Sorry. Nerves," he excused.

"So can I?" Bella asked and her excitement was back in a split second. Edward nodded after a moment. "Any pointers?"

Edward cocked a brow, while seeming amused. "Just be careful with your teeth and it's pretty straight forward from there."

She opened her mouth and took the head in between her lips. She sucked gently, while letting her tongue follow the contours of the warm flesh. The skin was so smooth.

Edward's large hands weaved into her hair that was tumbling like a curtain down in front of her face and gently swept it away from his line of sight. His breath was carefully controlled, as he let out a long sigh.

Grasping a bit harder at the base, she let her mouth sink further down his shaft using her mouth as a vacuum. Edward moaned and Bella could sense his eyes roll back into his head with pleasure. What an invigorating feeling. The muscles of his stomach seemed to tense, but his hands carefully fishing her hair way from her face and mouth were so unearthly gentle.

Bella was absolutely positive that he was watching her. She knew if she looked up that she would meet his eyes and she did. His gaze was the embodiment of intensity.

While Bella tried to go deeper, the hard flesh hit the back of her mouth, touching that sensitive spot that automatically made her throat cramp and she gagged around him.

"Careful, sweetie," Edward said softly. His fingers gently massaged her scalp. "Pull back a bit. Don't go so deep. You're doing so well." His mouth formed a perfect 'O,' as he moaned softly.

Following his advice, she focused on working the part of him she could manage without activating her gag reflex again. Having this very powerful part of him in her mouth pushed her body to new and unfamiliar places. She hadn't expected that giving pleasure was so much pleasure in itself. She relished every one of his deep sighs and slow guttural moans.

Trying to use her hand and mouth at the same time wasn't exactly as easy as expected. It took a bit of coordination. Edward winced a few times. A sound that Bella was sure wasn't exactly from pleasure, but she was sure with a bit of practice that she could manage to do better someday down the road.

She knew he would always be gentle with her, but the level of his tenderness surprised her. His one hand shifted from holding her hair to caressing the column of her neck and shoulder while she worked him with her mouth. The simple touch almost torched her skin. His long fingers traveled under her chin adding pressure for her to release him. She let go with a small pop caused by the vacuum in her mouth.

His smile was almost shy. "I'm not going to last long if you keep spoiling me like this." He raked his teeth over his bottom lip, while guiding her face back up to his. His lips were soft and enthralling when caressing her mouth. Bella followed his movements, as he rolled her to her back.

Instantly, she longed for that next step. She longed to have him bury his body inside of hers to fix that part of her she always thought had malfunctioned. The part, where she knew she should feel some kind of desire or lust for another person and not just a release by her own hand, was alive now, breathing and begging shamelessly on her knees for him to claim her.

Edward sat up, magically producing a condom from his hand. Where had that come from? Staring at the condom, Bella was intrigued. "Can I try?" she reached for the small package.

Edward nodded, while sitting back on his knees. "Just keep your nails away from it and hold the tip."

Somewhat awkwardly and with a little help from Edward, Bella managed to roll the condom on him.

She lay back again and her nerves made a comeback.

**Edward**

Edward didn't miss the sudden trembling that started running over her inner thighs. Looking Bella in the eyes, Edward saw the anxiety mirrored there as well. He couldn't blame her. In the back of his mind, he pondered whether he was pushing her into this.

Edward had held back completely. It had been solely her choice to use her mouth on him. A part of him felt like he was debasing this beautiful woman, but the internal battle had been utterly lost when it was quite clear, it was Bella who wanted the experience. His arousal had barely been leashed at the sight of her small mouth swallowing him. She had been so careful, yet so fearless going for what she wanted.

"Edward," Bella murmured with a slight tremor in her voice. "I'm scared it's going to hurt, but I want you so much, almost too much that I can't stand it."

He lay down over her, understanding that she had to be somewhat strung out. The lightheartedness from earlier was gone and left in its wake was an eerie quietness. "I can't say that it won't hurt, but I swear to be careful." He kissed her mouth softly. "Just keep talking to me and we'll figure it out, okay?"

Bella nodded with ardor and snaked her thighs up along his hips. Lining himself up, he kept eye contact with her. With a hand on her one thigh, he carefully pushed forward.

She was so warm.

Bella moaned softly. Her sweet breath feathered over his face.

He pushed again, moving deeper into her.

She was so soft and welcoming.

Bella hissed and her teeth clenched.

"Too hard?" he asked, fearful he was already being too rough.

"Not at all." Her hands gingerly stroked his hair. It felt so soothing. "It just feels like you're twice my size," she whispered.

"I kind of am." Enjoying the connection between them, Edward felt like the rest of the world had fallen away. Carefully, he buried himself a little deeper into her.

Nothing in the world had ever felt so inviting and supple like her. However, it almost felt like this was as far as he could get, yet he was far from all the way there. Bella's hands were locked into his hair with almost brute force. He didn't mind that it hurt his scalp, when in reality he was probably hurting her.

"Ah, this…" she panted. "The strain… It almost feels impossible." Her face scrunched up with discomfort.

"You want to stop?" Edward asked, but Bella shook her head quickly. "Relax as much as you can." With the hand he still had on her thigh, he held her as close as he could and she burrowed her face into his neck. She was so precious to him.

Moving more firmly this time, Bella yelped in surprise and Edward found himself being buried inside of her completely. It took a moment for him to regain his focus when the entire room was spinning deliriously. This connection was everything. Nothing had ever felt this right.

Kissing her face, her nose and finally her closed eyes, he was almost panic-stricken. "You okay? Did I hurt you, baby?"

"You didn't hurt me, but it hurts a bit." Bella's voice was small and stressed. Edward stroked her thigh, while continuing to kiss her face and hoping to convey how sorry he was for hurting her. He didn't mean to be so rough. It just happened. "You're shaking. Why?" Bella suddenly asked.

Why? He wasn't sure why… completely. His body was aching to move again, to start thrusting in and out. The need to make her feel what she should be feeling and not pain was frustrating him. Making love was supposed to feel good, no, great and here he was hurting her instead.

"Edward, look at me." Bella cupped his face in her hands. "Don't do that. We're in this together. It's not you versus me. It's you _with _me." Her fingers gingerly caressed his cheeks. "Now kiss me," she demanded.

Their mouths met, worshipping and sliding seductively against each other. Losing himself to the kiss, he brought his hand down to where they were connected. The feeling of himself hidden inside of her sent a shiver of pleasure down his spine. She was so amazing, so trusting and brave. God, he wanted nothing more than to please her. Realizing this was an act as old as time, Edward stopped thinking about the _don'ts_ and focused on the _do_'s. Gently, he started rubbing Bella's skin where she was so tightly stretched to accommodate him.

"That feels nice," she hummed. "I just need a moment, but please keep doing that."

Leaving small kisses along the column of her throat, Edward kept gently touching her like she asked. He listened to her breaths start to come and go more easily and it was evident when her body started to relax underneath him. He noticed her lips were softer now as he gently kissed her.

"Feel better?" he quietly asked.

"Much. I think you can move again." She returned his kiss and their tongues started sliding and gently caressing.

Slowly, he started moving out of her and into her, and at the same time feeling her body adjust to him. Everything suddenly felt so new and so absolutely different from all the superficial things in life. Their connection was all that mattered. Everything else faded to gray.

As he moved, Bella's body softened against his and soon their bodies were moving as one. The almost serene look on her face, small smiles that curled at the corners of her mouth and the desire radiating from her eyes was all he needed to know that she was okay. Their movements as one changed from careful and anxious to reverent and yearning. Both made noises that were swallowed up by the other one's mouth and drowned by their kissing. Thrusts and pushing brought their bodies to a place where no one could label them as individuals because they moved as one.

Sweat dewed on their bodies and collected between them, as they were lost in one another. Every now and again, their eyes met, locking with wondrous and loving expressions, only to have them close shortly after when pleasure sent overwhelming tendrils heat throughout their bodies.

Their fingers were intertwined and their mouths sometimes met, leaving short frantic kisses as Edward thrust and Bella greeted his movements with small rhythmical pants. It was like a song to him and her rhythm was designed to take his body soaring where gravity completely lost any consequence. His connection to her was resonating throughout his whole body and the friction was throwing him over the edge where he was falling, just to the sound of her voice. She felt so good and so right it petrified him.

"Oh, Bella," he groaned into her tangled hair at the crook of her neck. Their fingers let go of each other and his one hand went to her thigh hitched up along his hip. Her palms connected to his back, while the pads of her fingers dug into his skin, holding him tightly.

"Good… I feel so good," she mumbled into the crook of his neck. "Oh Edward, hold me. Oh God." Her body started trembling against his as he did his best to hold her to his body and support her when her grasp on him became almost desperate.

"You okay?" he asked. She nodded fervently in his arms, with her body still accepting his fevered movements. She moaned and her head pulled back, so they were nose to nose. Her eyes were dark and her pupils large, as she stared at him piercing right through to his soul. There was no questioning what she was feeling and that she was in the midst of tumbling right over the edge. "Oh, baby. Oh, sweet baby, just feel it." He kissed her face, feeling pride swell in his chest that together they had brought her to climax.

"Oh… ungh," she moaned still following his rhythm. "Oh, God. Follow me. Feel this with me."

Edward didn't need any encouragement, but only set his mind and body free to follow hers and to join her floating through the sensation and basking in the glow of their pleasure.

oooooOOOOooooo

**So yeah, I broke the drabble style, so sue me. LOL. I just had way too much to say. All I can say is that I hope you enjoyed this and please don't hesitate to share what you think in the comments. Good Lemon?**

**What was your first time like? Was it something you needed to get over with, was it awkward, or was it good? Did you do it with someone you loved or someone you never in a million years expected?**

**Seriously girls, you just took me past 1K reviews and I am clueless how to thank all of you. You're the best.**

**Now AnnaLund owns a huge part of this chapter. Without her words of wisdom and wicked skill this chapter wouldn't be half of what it is now. Chartwilightmom pre-read and boosted my confidence, Dazzled Eyes22 Betaed.**

**Tomorrow is the aftermath…**


	53. Day 27, Sunday, Bella

**Thank you so much for your comments and to those of you who shared what your first time was like for you. You are all such brave souls. I'm so sorry I didn't respond to reviews today. I need more hours in on day. **

**Stephenie Meyer created Twilight, I wrote this. **

**oooooOOOOooooo**

**Day 27:**

**Sunday**

**Bella**

Bella had woken up safely incased in Edward's vice grip. He had been holding onto her like a kid holds his or her favorite teddy.

She stared at herself in the mirror. God, she felt so different. While observing her form in the glass, she thought she looked different, though that was probably just her mind playing tricks on her.

Her smile was even different when she thought about the previous night.

What a first time…

Bella had known not to expect much when having sex for the first time and, in all honesty, she hadn't, but as her body fused with Edward's, it had been like chemistry took over. It was like mixing new components and then feeling surprised when the outcome was a stunning colorful blend. Edward had been sensational.

Slipping into the shower, she quickly washed her body eager to see Edward again. Being separated for mere minutes was frustrating. Right now, she needed him. She needed his body to embrace hers. Washing herself, she scrubbed the small spots of blood that had dried between her legs. The evidence of her lost virginity washed down the drain. It felt almost metaphorical. This was a part of the new Bella.

After her shower, she dressed, just wearing underwear and a fresh shirt. She was savoring the scent of Edward's shampoo stemming from her newly washed hair. The bottle of shampoo she had bought after the fire was still intact and untouched. She favored his.

As she padded into the kitchen, her mouth curled into a smile when she saw him popping a couple of slices of bread into toaster. Edward was still just in his pajama bottoms, probably going commando.

Edward's smile was breathtaking when he spotted her coming up to him. He didn't hesitate to bring her into his arms. It was like he needed the connection more than she did. How was that even possible? Edward lifted her, while leaving her feet dangling helplessly above the floor. Bella pulled her lower body up and wrapped her legs around his waist. He set her down on the breakfast bar and took a studious look at her, though he had seen her like ten minutes ago.

"Are you still feeling okay?"

Bella nodded in affirmation. "Why do you keep asking that?"

"I just can't escape the nightmare that … I hurt you last night. That maybe I was too rough with you."

"Trust me. I wasn't focusing on that. It hurt a bit in the beginning, but that was it. You weren't rough at all," Bella said softly and snatched a slice of bacon from the plate set on the table.

Edward hooked her wet hair behind her ears, looking at her adoringly. "So I really didn't hurt you?"

"For the tenth time, no, you didn't hurt me," Bella answered, trying not to feel exasperated. His concern was adorable, but it was getting a little repetitive.

Edward looked down, while running his palms up her bare thighs. His touch felt so soothing, almost like a balm to dry and itchy skin. "It's just that you bled… so much." His voice was barely audible.

Bella leaned in and kissed his face multiple times. "It wasn't much at all and it stopped." She paused, waiting for Edward to look her in the eye. "I happen to think that we did pretty amazing considering we were both practically virgins. I really enjoyed myself." She paused, before partially airing her worst fear. Would or could she be enough for him? "I don't know what it was like for you, though?"

Edward's hands were back on her face, threading his fingers into her damp hair. "It was more than I could ever expect." He leaned in and kissed her back. "So much more," he whispered. Bella didn't escape the fact that no promises or real reassurances followed that sentiment, though his tone was nothing but sincere.

The word _enough_ lingered just on the tip of her tongue, but she couldn't ask that question. Not yet anyway. This morning, she was so happy and so irrevocably content that asking the question of how she compare to a man as a sexual partner could very well shatter that bliss. Even though Bella kept telling herself that if heartbreak came knocking she would be prepared for it and take it, right now she wasn't in no way ready. She wanted so savor what they had experienced together last night.

Locking her feet behind his back, Bella trapped Edward's body within her own. Her hands slipped up his naked back, while enjoying the contours of his body. All that strength trapped within one beautiful man. "When can we have a repeat?" she asked coyly.

Edward threw his head back and laughed loudly. "One time and you're already insatiable. I may have been too thorough or maybe not thorough enough. You never cease to amaze me, Bella." Edward paused, caressing her cheeks with his knuckles. "How sore are you?"

Bella's face scrunched up. "Not too bad."

Edward pulled back a bit. "The truth, honey."

Bella looked down knowing that telling him would kill any chance of a little nookie later in the day. "Edward, it's nothing, really. I'm a little sore, but I don't care. Don't overthink this."

"I'm not overthinking, I'm being considerate." Edward dipped his head, while kissing her shoulder. "Give it a few days, Bella. Besides that, there's always a little oral." He winked at her and a devious smirk swept over his face.

Bella gasped, then all muscles clenched below her waist.

In the seconds that followed, Bella was horribly aware that they were no longer alone.

"Oh. My. God!"

"Are you freaking kidding me?"

Bella's head snapped in direction of the hall leading to the front door seeing the open-mouthed faces of both of Edward's younger sisters.

Bella's head flew back when Edward yanked her from the breakfast bar and shielded her semi-naked body behind his. "How long have you been here?" he snapped. "And how the hell did you get in?"

"We've been here long enough to overhear a conversation that was hardly meant for us and we used the spare key Mom has," Rosalie answered, while putting her hands on her hips. A snide smirk, just like one that Edward tended to make, slipped over her face.

"Jesus!" He gnashed his teeth together.

"We wanted to ask you to come home for lunch. We were going to hang out by the pool," Alice said quietly, looking bashful.

"Have you ever heard of a phone?" Edward bit out, still holding Bella behind him. Tension and anger was radiating off his body. It scared her, not in a physical way, but in that way that she might not be _enough_ for him scared her, too.

Bella couldn't help but wonder if he was embarrassed. Sure, their little conversation wasn't supposed to be overheard by his younger sisters, but why was he so out of sorts about it? It wasn't like they were caught in the act.

"Have you ever heard of picking up? We did call. Now what is really important here… did you remember to use a condom?" Rosalie's tone was absolutely snide. Edward growled, but it was to no avail because Rosalie was already headed out of the room snickering as she went. Bella blushed.

"I'll get dressed," Bella muttered, while passing Alice. She was headed for the bedroom to put on some clothes as she heard Alice speak.

"What happened to Ben?"

She didn't wait for the answer because she suddenly felt nauseated. Ben… Though they barely spoke about him, Bella knew that she was naïve for ignoring the other man. In reality, that was just what he was – the other man. Somewhere in the shadows, he was lurking, not far from center of the action no matter what was going on between Edward and her. While running a brush through her hair quickly, Bella heard the loud voices pick up as Edward and Rosalie got into a fight.

Edward was furious.

But, why?

oooooOOOOooooo

**Dun, dun, dun… Now why do you think Edward is so pissed off?**

**Thank you for reading and please hit that review button below.**

**Thank you to Chartwilightmom and AnnaLund for pre-reading. Dazzled Eyes22 betaed.**

**See you tomorrow.**


	54. Day 27, Sunday, Edward

**I own the plot, SM created the sparkly new toys.**

**Thank you for all your comments and especially the ones I could not reply to.**

oooooOOOOooooo

**Day 27:**

**Sunday**

**Edward**

Though they had been called out this morning, Edward and Bella had still decided to follow the girls to their parents' place. He had gotten into a huge fight with Rosalie and Alice had been too quiet when his anger unleashed.

"I'm sorry I was such a jerk back at the house," Edward said quietly. He was sitting on the edge of the pool with his legs dangling into the water. "I was just really shocked."

Bella, who was submerged in the water, was staring across the pool to where his parents were sitting in the shade. Carlisle was reading and Esme was picking through an interior-decorating magazine. "It's okay, Edward." Her answer was a little too cold and void to be believable.

He didn't like it.

Edward wasn't sure what to say when the squealing coming from Rose distracted him. When his sisters had said hanging out by the pool in his head, he still imagined the girls with Hello Kitty swim rings and Minnie Mouse floaties. So as Edward watched Rose play fighting in the pool with her boyfriend, it was a bit hard to accept that the girls were almost grown up, especially when Emmett's physique was of a full-grown man and hardly of a seventeen-year-old boy. He kept ducking Rose's head underwater, pushing her or dousing her face every time she tried to relax. It was basically a rendition of boy likes girl and boy then teases girl. What he had a hard time forgetting was the pregnancy scare and the fact that she was sexually active. He wasn't about to meddle in how his father raised his kids, but to Edward, he seemed a bit too nonchalant to have that boy, that was mostly a man, hanging around his baby sister.

It was worse when he looked to Alice. She was younger and still a kid in many ways, but somehow she had grown up right under his nose. Now, she was lounging on one of the tanning beds curled up with her first and probably what would be her only boyfriend, while softly talking to him. He knew that Alice and Jasper understood when he had felt like the entire world had fallen away from him when he had been with Bella last night because right now, looking at them, it was clear that his dark haired sister and her blond boyfriend didn't notice the rest of the world around them. Having met Jasper only today, he thought he was a bit of an odd pairing for his often too verbal sister. The scarred boy was soft-spoken, somewhat timid and didn't say much, but when he did, Alice quieted down and listened attentively.

Edward looked down again at Bella's body floating in the water and kicking her feet slowly up and down. She had her arms resting at the side of the pool. In the bright sunlight, the pale membrane of her skin looked even more fragile. "Did you put sunscreen on?" he asked.

"Yeah," she mouthed and turned her head in the opposite direction. It was like she was rejecting him.

He ran his hand over her head. "Look at me please," he asked softly. Bella turned back to face him again. "Are you mad at me?"

"No." Bella didn't elaborate. Instead, she just kept quiet. Edward wasn't having it.

"Then what's bothering you?"

Bella's lips tightened and she closed her eyes for a long moment. She looked to be deep in thought. "Are you embarrassed to be with me?" Her voice was barely a breath.

"What? No! Why would you think that?"

"You were so mad at Rose and Alice back at your apartment. I don't see why you were so angry other than you got caught with me. You didn't want them to see me with you."

Edward's mouth fell open. "The reason I was so mad had nothing to do with you. I was mad because I am grown man and that was my house. I have a right to my privacy and they violated that. We were having a private conversation and they just barged in…" Edward sighed, not sure what else to say or how else to explain it.

Bella turned her head away again. "I still think you're embarrassed to be caught with me."

"What do I have to do?" he almost scoffed.

"If you weren't embarrassed, you wouldn't have gotten angry. That's a simple fact. Would you have gotten mad at them if you had been caught kissing Ben in your kitchen?" Bella turned her head, while capturing the stunned look on his face. He opened his mouth, but no defense came out. Edward knew the answer to that one. No, he wouldn't have gotten _that _mad. Sure, he would probably have reminded them that he had a right to his privacy, but nothing like the scolding he had given the girls.

"I didn't think so," Bella said softly. "What you can do is figure out if I will ever be enough for you." Her gaze lingered directly on him, while measuring his every expression with uncanny skill.

Her words stuck to his mind like gum in his hair. Was last night enough? It was a double-edged answer that he didn't want to admit to himself. Being with Bella had surpassed any experience he had ever had with a woman by hundreds of miles, but had he forgotten or lost the need to be with a man or one specific man? He wasn't sure. What he was sure of was that he couldn't afford to lose Bella and have her walk out of her life.

Edward watched as she pushed herself away from the ledge of the pool ducking her head under the water. She slipped effortlessly through the element and popped her head above the water when she was almost at the other side.

He was resolute as he got up and walked over to where Bella was basking around. He noticed his father put his book down reaching for his mother's hand. "You want some fruit or a drink, dear?" Carlisle asked Esme.

Edward returned his attention to Bella before throwing his shirt off. Without warning, he jumped in right next to her. Rosalie and Emmett stopped playing around and watched him as he put his arms around Bella. Without warning, he leaned in and pressed his lips to her. It wasn't a kiss meant for passion, but a kiss meant as the one thing he could do to set the record straight. He wasn't ashamed of her in any way and he didn't want her to be hurting or disappointed.

He knew without a doubt that his entire family was watching them. So the fact that he had made a treaty with the girls to keep quiet about Bella seemed pretty redundant right now.

"Is it clear enough now that I am not embarrassed about you?" he asked, as he pulled back. Bella's hands had moved to rest around his neck.

"That point is clear now," Bella answered, while smiling. However, the curl of her lips didn't entirely reach her eyes. Edward narrowed his eyes at her, while waiting for her to go on. Her eyes were deep and almost pained as she trapped her lip between her teeth. "Though, what's not clear is if I'm the only one in here now?" Her hand drifted down and lightly tapped his chest.

Edward closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "I'm doing the best I can, Bella," he answered evasively.

"I know you are, but maybe, just maybe you should acknowledge what you feel for me and what you feel for Ben. Between us, I think we have taken our relationship as far as we can without needing a label to where we stand, but that won't last forever. I don't mean to pressure you, but last night proves the physical part works pretty well, but where do you stand on the emotional part?"

After Bella astutely addressed the elephant in the room so directly, Edward was left once more admiring her strength and open-mindedness. Never in his life had he met a person as selfless as her, so willing and ready to open up the closet and flush out all of the skeletons. She was so brave and he was such a coward for playing her this way. For crying out loud, he had taken her virginity, fully well knowing that in the back of his heart and soul she wasn't the only one he had feelings for. He was such a traitor and felt absolutely spineless. However, instead of opening the subject while floating around in his parent's pool, he remained the gutless coward that he was.

He hugged her closer, trapping her small delectable body to his and buried his head in the crook of her neck. "I can't lose you," he whispered, knowing full well he should man up and face that elephant as well.

Bella's arms went around his body and hugged him back.

"Fuck," Edward muttered suddenly, when he felt the heavy object in his pant pocket brush against his thigh.

"What?" Bella asked alarmed.

"I just drowned my phone." She frowned at him. "My house keys and phone are in my pocket."

"Oh!" Bella gasped, clearly getting it when they were submerged up to their shoulders.

oooooOOOOooooo

**That will be the last for today.**

**Thank you to Chartwilightmom and AnnaLund for pre-reading and Dazzled Eyes22 for betaing. **

**See you tomorrow. **

**XOXO**


	55. Day 28, Monday, Bella

**This is my plot, Stephenie's characters.**

**Huge apologies for not responding to your awesome reviews from yesterday, yes I am hiding in shame. **

**Now, this is what I got for you lovely ladies today. Enjoy**

oooooOOOOoooo

**Day 28:**

**Monday**

**Bella**

Bella was hardly unaware that Edward hadn't given her any promises. In reality, she didn't want them. Not yet. If assurances never came, she understood why. She had always accepted that this whole affair was as fragile as a spider web in human hands. She knew that technically their love was struggling impossible odds from the very beginning with Edward being gay. Despite the fact that they had become intimate, it didn't change the reality that he was attracted to men. She wasn't sure if it was mainly the physical or emotional part that would be the roadblock between them, or perhaps, it would end up being both.

She was standing on a precipice with her toes hanging free off the edge. She was fighting a losing battle and she might as well let go of it all because there was no turning back. Without thought to the consequences, she hurled her body into the vortex that swirled just below her feet.

"I think you should go see him," Bella said, while pushing her food around on her plate.

Edward's burning gaze did nothing to dispute her theory that he was batting internally. He had hardly spoken a word since yesterday at his parents' place or all day today. All of his answers were monosyllabic. It was clear that his mind was at war and the battle was set to begin.

What brought on this new and more direct turn of event was that Bella had Edward spotted sitting alongside Ben today. He had been in a meeting with Aro regarding a casting of several extras for a music video and apparently Ben had been there, too. The men had been laughing. Their conversation was animated and cheerful and Edward's smile said it all. Ben was very much a part of him. She had no doubt that Edward harbored feelings for the handsome dark haired man. The sparkle in Edward's eyes was clear as day. She had watched them for several minutes, studied them and noticed their gestures, their smiles and a strange tangible connection they still shared.

Her stomach had been a pool of acid, but right now she was adamant to go through with this. If she won his heart completely at some point, then she wouldn't have to wonder if Edward would have wanted Ben more than her.

Seeing them today, Bella narrowed it down to one simple fact. It wasn't the gay element that was a problem for her as much as it was the _Ben_ element.

When Edward hadn't answered, she continued carrying out her plan and hoping to a higher power that she wouldn't regret this in the future. "What does your heart tell you, Edward?" she asked, biting back the trepidation lodged in her chest.

Edward took a deep breath digging the heels of his palms into his eyes. "Just don't, okay? You're making it all worse."

"Don't you see the message in that? Would you sit here in pain, if you didn't care for Ben?" Bella asked softly.

Edward gnashed his teeth like he was biting back agony from a blow to the stomach. "Why are you doing this, Bella?"

"Because I want to help you. I want you to figure out what is right for you." Bella was able to keep the tremble out of her voice. She didn't want Edward to know how much she feared doing this, but it was time that something was done.

"Do you even know what that will mean?" Edward asked, while staring at his food and dragging his fork through the sauce that was chilling on his plate. A moment later, he raised his gaze to hers. The gleam in her eyes was almost defiant. She sighed.

"Probably more than you do. Look, Edward, you don't owe me anything. You've never made me any promises and learning once and for all what you feel and what you want is the only way for me to move on." She paused, hoping to sound powerful enough to convince him to be selfless and do what felt right to him. "What does your heart tell you?" she urged again.

"That I will lose you if I follow that path right now," Edward deadpanned and put his fork down.

Bella's gaze was soft and understanding. "Edward, if your heart tells you to go see Ben, then, by all means, go see Ben."

"And then come home and find you gone?" he countered frostily.

"No. Go figure out what you need to know, then come home and be honest with me." Under the table, she was digging her nails into her palm harshly to diffuse the pain that was radiating from her chest.

"Why would you do this, Bella?" Edward whispered.

Bella's voice was small as she spoke. "If you want something very badly, set it free. If it comes back to you, it's yours forever. If it doesn't, it was never yours to begin with." She paused very briefly. "I'm doing this because I love you."

"You love me?" Edward murmured, looking astonished.

Bella nodded, while trying to keep her head from going fuzzy with the heavy palpitations in her chest. She could hear her pulse slamming just behind her ear. "Just promise me one thing."

"What's that?"

"When you've been to see him, tell me the truth. Don't go around thinking that you have to protect me. Tell me the truth if I have to let you go." Bella swallowed, feeling her throat constrict. She wasn't naïve at all. She was very well aware that there was a chance that things got… physical between them. It was very clear from this afternoon that the men were still attracted to each other.

Edward stood to put his plate in the sink. He looked at her with large adoring eyes before he spoke a few words that changed her world.

oooooOOOOooooo

***raising hand* are we back to cliffy's again? I think I can say that the shit is about to hit the fan.**

**What are your thoughts?**

**The quote Bella is using is from the movie 'Indecent Proposal'.**

**Chartwilightmom, AnnaLund and Dazzled Eyes22 you all know how much I treasure you.**

**See you tomorrow, and I can safely tell you that Edward is already nervous.**


	56. Day 28, Monday, Edward

**I own and wrote this story, but Stephenie Meyer created the characters.**

**Thank you so much for your comments and how much you love Bella's bravery. With that said, I have Edward sitting here beside me. He's picking his nails to the point of bleeding, mumbling, almost chanting, for all of you to forgive him.**

_**Warning: some may find what happens today to be inexcusable, but the way I see it, shit happens every day, people mess up every day, this is a part of reality whether we want to acknowledge it or not. What matters to me, is how we handle the aftermath. **_

_**-Nelly, 2012**_

oooooOOOOooooo

**Day 28:**

**Monday**

**Edward**

Edward was all shades of anxious when he finally mustered the courage to knock on the door. He was walking very thin ice and was abundantly clear on that point. However, that was just about the only thing that he was sure of.

"You? Edward, what are you doing here?" Ben blurted surprised when he opened the door.

The words got caught in Edward's throat and the two men just ended up staring at each other for long silent moments. I… er… I," Once again, Edward was reduced to be a stuttering heap of nerves. "Can I come in?"

Ben's answer was simple. He pushed the door wide open, making room for Edward to pass.

Having spent most of the day with Ben, it was happening to Edward again. It was the same feelings that had worked havoc in his body the day Bella had told him that she wasn't gay. Now everything had crashed down around him again. He was so lost once more and desperately seeking solace to find something to anchor him and keep him steady. It was just that Edward didn't know who the hell the anchor was? Was it Bella or Ben?

Ben's brown eyes were incisively intense, as he read every twitch that came from Edward's body. "How are you?" The dark haired man asked, sounding concerned.

Those words resounded through Edward's entire body. How was he? Torn up and confused was mostly what he was feeling, but he refused to put that into words. It would be like acknowledging defeat and that was not happening. He didn't want to admit his weakness. Edward couldn't answer, but only stared at the man who was as beautiful inside as he was gorgeous on the outside.

"Does Isabella know that you're here?" Ben kept questioning.

Edward managed a nod, while clearing his throat that felt like sandpaper. "She knows."

Ben looked down for a moment with his dark glossy hair flopping over his forehead. "You want a beer?" he asked a moment later.

"Yeah, a beer sounds good," Edward answered. Simple questions… _that_ he could handle. He followed Ben to the kitchen, while watching him with rapt attention. Ben seemed nervous.

Picking out two beer cans from the fridge, he offered one to Edward. "So how's it going with her… Isabella?" Ben's eyes were somewhat sad, but underneath it all, he seemed to be doing better. He definitely had this afternoon.

"It's going pretty good," Edward hedged, not sure how much he should elaborate on the subject. Did Ben really want to know this part?

The dark haired man led the way to the couch and then gestured for Edward to sit down. Immediately, images of them together flared in his mind. How many times had they gone at here? How many ways had one of them begged for the other not to stop when the sensation of hands or a mouth brought sensuous pleasure?

He suddenly started to feel warm.

Edward cleared his throat, decisively opening the beer. The fluid was cold and bitter in his mouth. He sat down slowly.

"You neck's flushing," Ben said quietly. He reached out and gently traced the pattern that had to be forming on Edward's throat. His touch felt nice and the air grew seemingly thick.

"I was just thinking… remembering…" Edward shrugged off the thought and chose not to continue. Silence started to drag an awkward trail through the room.

"You want to tell me why you're here?" Ben raised his brows.

Explain…

Edward sighed and closed his eyes, while noticing Ben was still touching him gently. "I've been trying to figure out my life. It's not really working. I mean… I've been stuck in this chaos since Saturday…" The air got stuck in his lungs when he realized what he was about to say.

Ben frowned. "What happened Saturday?" The bronze haired man almost groaned when he realized that he had slipped up. Ben stopped brushing the pads of his fingers over Edward's throat. "No point in explaining. I think I get the message." His tone was a tad bit colder now.

Edward leaned forward, balancing his elbows on his knees and burying his head in his hands. "I'm so sick of this shit. I'm so fucking tired of hurting the two people I love. I keep searching for a solution, but there's nothing. Absolutely nothing. I want you both. Sometimes I wish that you and Bella were the same person, so that I could have you both… and keep you. I'm so sick of everything…"

"Hey…" Ben mused. "Come here." The dark haired man's hands slipped over Edward's shoulders, guiding him into an embrace. Edward let out a sigh of relief, when he was buried deeply in Ben's arms surrounded by his familiar scent. Edward hugged his former lover back.

This was exactly what Edward needed - someone to take charge and someone to tell him what to do for once, so he could relax for just one single moment.

Ben's hands were gently running up and down his back in a slow and soothing motion. It felt heavenly.

"You're a mess," Ben whispered in his ear. Edward only tightened his grip on the other man. He couldn't help but relish the connection to this incredible man. Edward felt safe with him, like a child in his parents' care.

In the midst of his turmoil, it didn't escape Edward how familiar the other man's body felt against his own. Ben's scruffy chin was pressing against his cheek and his arms around Edward's body that were as strong as his own and achingly familiar.

"What does Isabella say to all of this?" Ben murmured.

"She understands me," Edward whispered. "She knows what I'm going through."

Ben pulled back a bit, looking compassionately at Edward. "You know how many times I wished for this? Just to get to hold you again?" His hand weaved into Edward's tussled hair. Edward could smell his minty breath. Ben never even opened the beer. Oh, that sweet breath tampered with every cell of his body, almost turning them liquid. "I missed you."

"Me, too." The two small words were what broke the dam and restraints started uncurling, like a rope untwining. The energy between them was charged, pulsating between them echoes of sound waves.

Ben tilted his head to the side, regarding Edward with soft brown eyes. "You said that you loved me…" Ben licked his bottom lip and Edward stared as if hypnotized. After a moment, he nodded. "You love her, too?"

"Yeah, I love Bella," Edward answered honestly though his mind was starting to feel a bit woozy like he's had too much to drink. He'd only taken one sip of the beer. "She was the one who told me to come see you."

Ben's answering smile was small, when he kept studying Edward from very close up. "Brave woman."

Edward scoffed. "You have no idea."

Ben didn't pull back, but kept his hands and body indecently close to his former lover. "Are we going to sit here and talk about Isabella, or might there be another reason for your visit?" Ben's timber dropped to a deep and sultry murmur.

Edward breathed heavily. "I wish I understood myself. I wish…" he trailed off, while feeling a yearning for the other man that wasn't forgotten at all, just ignored for a while. It was purely physical and almost primordial. Though the last few weeks with Bella had been pretty close to spectacular, this was what he knew. The masculine scent thrown off Ben's skin was something that he understood and knew so well. Being in a forum where he was familiar with everything and knowing in every nook and cranny was strangely relaxing. Here, he didn't have to worry if he was okay and if he was doing the right thing. For once, he could take a breather and… just be.

His hands moved to Ben's waist, not even having to familiarize himself with the firm and hard body beneath the fabric. He already knew exactly what the other man felt like.

Ben's breathing had changed and was coming in small staccato pants. "The fight is on," the dark haired man murmured the second before their lips met. This was officially the gong going off like at a boxing game. Ben had already asked if he should fight and now he was.

Edward didn't slow Ben's rather eager mouth on his nor did he reject him when their tongues clashed, caressed and struggled almost desperately. The feeling of Ben's lips and roughness of his chin was heavenly and felt beyond safe.

It was like a flash of light from a dark sky, instant and absolutely blinding. The connection was suddenly like a vent to let off the steam that had been building like in a pressure cooker. Right now, this was the answer to kill his frustration. Edward knew how to do this.

Ben grasped Edward's thighs, using his strength to tilt him backwards and ending up hovering above him. Edward's hands worked at the exact same pace as Ben's when shirts were yanked over their heads. The warmth of Ben's skin was enticing, bringing forth how much Edward missed this connection with a body that he knew and understood.

"You feel incredible," Ben murmured into the crook of Edward's neck kissing and nipping with unleashed excitement. Accommodating the shape of Ben's body, Edward spread his legs lightly, feeling the pressure on him and adding friction where he suddenly seemed to ache.

Ben's palms were on Edward's bare chest with a strength that matched his own. The simple fact he wasn't the strong one, but merely a match for his partner only relaxed him. He didn't need to act with care now. He could just let loose and he did.

Edward brought his hand down between them, cupping his hand over the other man. Ben groaned loudly as he thrust his hips forward, clearly greeting Edward's touch. Their mouths locked again, while sharing frantic and fervent kisses. Edward tugged the waistband of Ben's sweats down, quickly grasping the hard flesh. He started stroking and jerking his hands over the rigid flesh. The sliver of pleasure only reminded Edward of how good it felt to know exactly what he was doing… physically.

Ben's fingers were on Edward's shoulders coiling roughly around his skin and muscles. Ben's mouth drifted over Edward's jaw taking small nips as he peppered eager kisses to his skin.

"Fuck, I need you," Ben moaned. "I need you so much."

Edward didn't answer. He just added pressure around Ben's erection increasing the physical stimulation.

The dark haired man moved south, leaving himself out of reach for Edward, who had absolutely no resistance when his pants were opened and dragged down his legs. He knew exactly what was going to happen. Edward only let out a loud groan when his erection was enveloped by a wonderful, warm and skilled mouth.

He leaned his head against the arm of the couch, while absorbing the pleasure that rocked his body. His fingers weaved into Ben's hair accepting the gesture of the fight that had begun.

oooooOOOOooooo

***hangs head* Let me hear it… because I know you have thoughts about these two boys. **

**Thank you to Chartwilightmom and AnnaLund for convincing me to stick to my guns and write the story that I wanted to and not be a pussy... Because I tend to be one. Thank you to Dazzled Eyes22 for betaing this.**

**Perhaps today is not the day to find me on Twitter, but I am there anyway. Elvirina_Nelly**

**Check out today's chapter of Squeeze my Lemon. Chartwilightmom charmed me into doing another one shot for her wonderful collection of Lemons.**

**XOXO**


	57. Day 29, Tuesday, Bella

**I came up with the plot, Stephenie Meyer gave us Edward and his entourage.**

**Whew, I knew this was going to be tricky, but holy crow you all came out of the woodwork.**

**What is there to say in Edward's defense? Not a whole lot, I agree, he fucked up. Not saying that he didn't, but I am happy that so many of you see the nuances of why Edward did what he did instead of the action itself. What an awesome crowd of readers that I have. **

_**jetstreamRose, Lealoves, Nicoconsd, LucyMac, Kroseph and AnnaLund**_** you all rocked my world with your reviews and gave me confidence. Thank you for all your thoughtful and emotional comments. I enjoyed reading every single one of them. I'm sorry I didn't get around to answering all of you.**

**Now, what will Bella say or do?**

oooooOOOOooooo

**Day 29:**

**Tuesday**

**Bella**

Bella's entire world had faded to black. Her body was positively numb and it didn't feel like her heart was beating today. Through the entire journey with Edward, she knew the possibility of a broken heart was more than likely. She had accepted it beforehand, but she hadn't known exactly how it would feel. Right now, it felt like her body had been ripped inside out, an emotion so extreme that it left her without sensation. She couldn't help but wonder if she had been a tad bit naïve. She sure as hell hadn't expected a broken heart to be this overpowering.

The elevator in the office building was empty until the doors closed around a proffered hand. Bella had the urge to laugh hysterically when Ben slipped into the small enclosed space.

Ben's face absolutely froze when he saw her.

Bella expected Edward to follow the dark haired man, but he didn't. She hadn't seen him since last night when she let him go.

Tears were burning her eyes and she no longer felt paralyzed. The flames were back, licking her skin like acid etching away the membrane. Her insides felt like smoldering embers turning her into lifeless ash.

"I'm sorry," Ben said softly. Bella didn't look up or offer the other man her response. She already knew she had lost. "I had to," the man said as a way of explaining.

The seconds felt like hours as the elevator slowly rose. At the risk of screaming out her agony, Bella decided that it was safer to remain silent.

Bella tried to breathe as she finally got off the elevator, but it was still impossible. Would Edward be at his office? Would he even want to speak with her?

She had no clue.

Angela looked at her warily when Bella set her purse down. "You okay, sweetie?" Angela asked with the utmost concern.

"I'm fine," Bella answered in a clipped response. "Can we not talk about it?" She dared a peek at Edward's office. It was empty and appeared abandoned. She wasn't sure if she was relieved or sad. It was so hard distinguishing one feeling from the other in the chaos of her heart.

"Sure," Angela answered warily. "Could I get you to update the guest lists and make sure that the caterers have the approved menu for next Friday?"

"No problem," Bella answered, while trying to get some oxygen into her lungs.

"Oh, and by the way, why the hell is Edward wearing the same shirt that he was in yesterday? You're still staying with him, right?" Angela asked.

Bella slowly closed her eyes, while feeling the pain twist in her gut. "He's here?" she breathed.

"Yeah. He was absolutely torturing the living daylight of the piano down in Studio B when I arrived half an hour ago. He's still down there." Bella didn't miss Angela's shrewd expression. "What is going on between you? Excuse me for saying this, Bella, but you two are like magnets. He moves. You move…" Angela's voice drifted off.

"I can't talk about it," Bella managed to squeeze out when it felt like she was being suffocated. Bella hugged her body, literally trying to hold herself together. It wasn't working. Wasn't heartbreak supposed to be figurative, instead of the physical aching and breaking pain that Bella felt in her chest?

Lifting her head and trying to capture just one small breath, she caught Edward standing stock still a bit away. His eyes were utterly broken and the beautiful green was positively riddled with guilt. This was exactly what she knew would happen, but naively thought that she could handle it.

How stupid.

"Bella, please. What's wrong?" Angela pressed.

The burning tears started to spill as Bella did her best to gather up the pieces of her shattered heart. So much for taking chances. She wasn't risking anything ever again if failure was supposed to hurt like this.

"Angela, please…" Bella begged, when her friend pressuring her to talk made everything so much worse. She quickly dashed her tears away.

Mustering up all the courage she had left, Bella looked up at Edward again. He was still in the same spot, just outside of his office.

It felt like an ice pick was being jammed into heart.

"Isabella, I'd like to talk to you in my office, please," Edward's voice was quiet, yet lingering just above a whisper. If she wasn't aching all the way into her bones, the fact that he called her Isabella was like the kiss of death. "Hold all calls and cancel my meetings for the day, Angela."

Shaking like a leaf, Bella started moving forward on her trembling legs. There was nothing left in her to prepare for the next blow that would come. She felt like a target, like a sitting duck just waiting for the bullet. After she spent a sleepless night waiting and speculating every second what was going on between the two men, it was hard to string a coherent sentence together, let alone protect herself from what was to come.

Edward closed the door, thereby shutting out the sound of the others and Angela, who was doing nothing to hide the fact that she was staring.

The silence was all consuming as both their breathing started to speed up.

"I'm so sorry," Edward finally murmured. He sank to his knees right in front of her like stones in a landslide. His head was bowed and his hands were on his thighs in a completely submissive pose.

"You didn't call or text," Bella managed to choke out. All night, she hadn't been able to close an eye and couldn't help wondering if he was okay.

Edward peered up at her through his long dark lashes. "I lost my phone, remember? After that, I think I lost my mind a bit and time somehow sped past me. I'm sorry for that, too."

"Where were you?" Bella whispered, while wondering why he was just sitting on the floor like that. It seemed so out of character for him.

"I went to that bar where you met Kim a few nights back. After that, I came back here." Edward hauled in a deep breath, but his eyes were shattered. "I've been here all night, just working and losing my mind. I didn't have the guts to go home to you."

Bella felt a fraction of relief. Perhaps, things weren't as bad as she feared. He had been here. She knew he was being honest with her and if he said that he was here, then that was the truth.

"Did you mean what you said last night?" Edward asked quietly, as his gaze fell down to the floor again. "Did you mean it when you said that you loved me? Did you mean the quote you used? If you want something very badly, set it free. If it comes back to you, it's yours forever. If it doesn't, it was never yours to begin with."

The brimming tears in her eyes once more lost to gravity and washed down her cheeks, as Edward's voice was the epitome of sincerity. This was it, though this was hardly the place for this kind of discussion. "Yes, I meant it." She snorted somewhat confused to where this was going.

"Then you have me forever…" Edward stopped, once more raising those beautiful, but broken green eyes to hers. Instinctively, Bella knew it was too soon to hope. "Though, I hope you can find it in yourself to forgive me," Edward whispered.

Slowly, her mouth opened and her dry lips parted. "Oh, no." Her body tilted forward and the impact of the virtual blow almost killing her - Ben and Edward together. Bella thought she could handle this. She had been prepared, but when that wrecking ball came to claim her, she didn't withstand the trauma. The sobs were instant as she literally crumbled. It took a moment to get the words out. "You had sex with him?"

Edward's voice sounded thick with tears of his own. "I'm so sorry," he whispered and Bella knew it was his way of answering yes. After that, the uncontrolled sobbing rocked her body.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Oh boy, do they have some talking to do… or what?**

**You were all so successful hitting that comment button yesterday, now let me see you do that again unless you unfollowed this story.**

**Chartwilightmom and AnnaLund had my back yesterday just like they do every day. Dazzled Eyes22 betaed the story.**

**I'm on Twitter lurking as usual. Elvirina_Nelly**

**Edward is up tomorrow. I'll see you then.**


	58. Day 29, Tuesday, Edward

**I fucked up their relationship, but Stephenie Meyer created Edward and Bella in the first place.**

**Thank you again for all those wonderful and very wordy comments. I Floved them and it kept me busy for most of the morning. I managed to answer about half, to the other half I'm sorry I didn't thank you personally.**

**Now a lot of you think that Bella should just kick his nuts and cut her loses, but the others think she should stay and work it out. **

**Lets she what she will do…**

oooooOOOOooooo

**Day 29:**

**Tuesday**

**Edward**

"Dad?" Edward mouthed surprised when he opened the front door. Out in the hall, his father stood with a baseball bat leaning against his shoulder.

"I thought we could go to the batting cage," Carlisle said, smiling.

Edward looked down. His chest felt like cement. "Now is not really a good time." He hesitated. "But come in," he offered. Tiredly, he rubbed his eyes with his fingers. He was beyond exhausted. "You want some coffee?" Edward asked when they were in the kitchen.

"Sure," his father answered and set the baseball bat down beside him. "You look like hell." Carlisle stated.

"I feel worse," Edward countered. He was running out of ways to describe how lousy and despicable he felt.

"Where's Isabella?" Carlisle asked and looked around.

Edward felt that bone deep ache crawl through every cell of his body at the mere sound of her name. He closed his eyes for a moment. "She's taking a nap."

"Is she okay?" His father asked, quite concerned.

Edward simply couldn't answer, so he dodged. Bella was not okay and it was all his fault. "What's up?" He asked and placed a mug of coffee in front of his father.

Carlisle traced the rim with his finger. "Well, it's not really any of my business, but after this Sunday at the house, I am dying to know what is going on with you. First Ben and now Bella? You're making our heads spin, son."

"I know, Dad. Shit! Do I know that." Edward sighed and hung his head off his shoulders. "I fucked up. I really fucked up."

Carlisle looked at his son with utter surprise. "You want to talk about it?" His father took a sip of his coffee.

Edward pulled in another troubled breath. "Did you ever hurt Mom? I mean… Really, really hurt her to the point where there is no return?"

Carlisle looked thoughtful for a moment. "Yeah, I did. It was a while ago though. I think you were about four years old, maybe five. We were having a lot of problems back then, but it was one specific thing that was the straw that broke the poor camel's back. I forgot your mother's birthday because I was so busy at school. When I realized I made a mistake, I apologized to her and promised that something like that would never happen again." Carlisle's small smile was sad as Edward waited for him to continue. "Three weeks later, I forgot our anniversary. I promise you that I will never forget the look in your mother's eyes. It wasn't that she expected a present or anything like that. All she wanted was to spend the evening with me, for us to simply take a walk and hold hands. I apologized as usual and I meant every single one of those apologies. You know what she told me?"

"What?" Edward asked carefully.

"I don't care." Carlisle paused. "Those words—_I don't care—_were exactly the same as the indifferent look in her eyes. She really didn't care anymore. That was when I realized I was in trouble, big trouble. I'd lost her."

Edward swallowed the lump in his throat. This was what he remembered from when he was a kid that cold breeze between them without knowing exactly what caused it. "What did you do then?"

"It wasn't easy. She didn't trust me and over the course of the years she had basically been raising you alone. She didn't need me anymore. She was fine on her own." Edward's father paused, while taking another sip of coffee. "I needed to show her that I loved her. It wasn't just about remembering birthdays or anniversaries, but it was about showing her that she could trust me again. So if I was even fifteen minutes late coming home, I called her to let her know. If I was getting a new toothbrush, I got one for her too. It was all the little things in everyday life that mattered. Basically, I learned to make you and her a priority in my life as much as my studies had been. Up until that point, I hadn't been much of a father or husband for that matter.

"It wasn't a magic fix where one good date equaled a successful marriage. It took time, years for her to really trust me and know that she could count on me. So, the silver lining is that I'm lucky your mom didn't kick me to the curb, but let me in again." Carlisle looked attentively at his son. "You're in love with Isabella, right?"

"Yeah. I'm in love with her," Edward answered after a moment. The heavy palpitations in his chest hurt so much it was hard to speak. "How did you know? Did mom tell you?"

"No." Carlisle shrugged and then sighed. "I can't explain it. I saw you with Ben, and then I saw you with Isabella. There's a difference. Not one that I can put my finger on…" he hedged. Great even his father had seen the difference of how he felt for Bella and then Ben before he had.

Edward stood completely numb on the opposite side of the breakfast bar. His vision started to blur. "I hurt her, Dad. And I don't think there's a way to fix how much of a coward I've been," Edward murmured and quickly removed the evidence of his pain that were about to spill from his eyes. His nose was getting stuffy, too.

Carlisle smiled fondly at his son. "There's always a way. You just need to find it, but my advice is that whatever you do, make her _the_ priority and don't ever let her doubt it."

Edward snorted. "You make it sound so easy."

"Love is never easy. It's complicated. It can be hurtful and a pain in the ass sometimes, but it's what makes life worth living. Well, in my opinion, at least." Carlisle stood and clearly thought. "You know what? We, men, are knuckleheads sometimes. It takes losing something before we realize what exactly it is that we have… I better get going." He picked up the baseball bat. "Call me, if you need to take some frustration out on this." He held up the bat.

That simple gesture made Edward cringe. Why the hell hadn't he thought about that to let some freaking steam out?

Carlisle rounded the breakfast bar, set the bat aside again and held out his arms. Edward couldn't remember the last time he hugged his dad, but now he needed it, more than anything. He dipped his head and buried his face in his father's embrace. "Thank you, Dad," he murmured as he battled the tears. Carlisle pulled back, smiling fondly. Edward looked his father in the eye. "And thank you for not asking what it is that I did."

Carlisle made a wry face. "I hate to tell you this, son, but it's pretty damn obvious what you did."

Edward closed his eyes in shame. Carlisle picked up the bat and moved to the door, leaving the apartment.

Staring into the blackness of his coffee that he hadn't even touched, Edward decided once and for all to stop being a fucking coward. It had already cost him Bella.

Seeing her this morning, witnessing that horrendous breakdown and knowing he caused it made it abundantly clear that he had acted like a total and complete idiot. He should never have gone to see Ben. Had he pulled his head out of his ass, he would have seen the difference between the two people he cared so deeply for.

He loved Bella. He simply adored her for everything that she was - her wit, her strength and her bravery. There was no one like her.

Ben was probably the kindest man he had ever known. His selflessness was unparalleled to almost everyone he knew. No matter in what scenario he compared the two; Bella was always the strongest to him. She stood brighter and more glorious than any other person he had ever encountered, even Ben. In hindsight, the generous and good-hearted man faded in comparison to her.

Had Edward opened his eyes a little sooner, he would have seen it. He would have realized that he had already said goodbye to the part of him who thought he needed to be with Ben. There was a reason he could never tell Ben that he loved him and why he could never get those meaningful words past his tongue. It was because he didn't love him. He adored him and respected him in many ways, but he never loved Ben like his heart fully embraced Bella for all that she was. With her, he would have no trouble saying those words. That was probably the easiest part. Right now, words of love and promises were lining up and almost tumbling over each other to see which ones would win her back.

Yes, Bella brought a whole new outlook of life to him. He had been fighting it, not embracing it… like he should have done. He had simply kept one foot on each side, desperately clinging to the past that he knew and understood, instead of stepping to the side where she owned his heart - the place where he already belonged.

Too late.

It was too late.

Slowly, he opened the door to the bedroom. She was on her side facing away from the door. Her breathing was slow and even.

My God, how she had cried when they left the office and he took her home.

She had been so broken, absolutely shattered.

Edward had wanted nothing more than to crawl into bed with her and hold her like he had when she had cried out in the aftermath of the fire, but he couldn't do that. He hadn't even showered. He felt disgusting and so repulsive to himself that he couldn't even touch her. He refused to debase her like that. She deserved so much better.

Eventually, her crying had subsided, her eyes had closed and her breathing had evened out.

Edward had sat on the floor by the bed, just watching her sleep. She was so beautiful and he was so stupid. How could he have been so blind? Right, he was a knucklehead. It really was true. He needed to lose her to realize how much he wanted her and how much he needed her. She was everything.

"You awake?" he asked softly, while kneeling beside the bed again. Right now, he dared to move a little closer. He felt less disgusted with himself now that he had had the chance to nearly scold his skin with the burning water of a shower.

Slowly, her puffy eyes opened. "Yeah." She looked lethargic as she lay in bed and curled into fetal position.

"Can we talk?" Edward asked carefully.

Bella's eyes brimmed with tears. "I'll cry again." Her voice was already muddled.

Slowly, Edward reached his hand out, wanting to stroke her hair. He wasn't sure if it was okay, but she didn't flinch away. Gently, he ran the pads of his fingers over Bella's soft tresses. "I'm so sorry that I hurt you. I never meant for anything like this to happen. I didn't realize how deeply you feel for me and I'm a fool for acting so carelessly when it comes to your feelings. I betrayed you and what I did is unforgiveable." Edward paused.

"What happened between Ben and you last night? Exactly," Bella prompted.

Edward's stomach churned. It was easier to just sweep it under the rug and refuse to answer her question, but the determination in her eyes and the fact he would do just about anything to earn her forgiveness left only one thing to do. Be honest. "We talked for a bit, then we started kissing and one thing lead to another…" Edward cleared his throat, hoping to get rid of the uncomfortable scratchiness. "He used his mouth on me." Edward stopped unable to continue explaining this.

"How did it feel?" Bella asked her voice was so small and her eyes endlessly deep with pain.

Edward narrowed his eyes at her, not having a clue why she would ask that question. The heavy and nervous beating of his heart was making him dizzy. "Er… Good in the beginning, comfortable, but then it started to feel wrong. I don't remember the specifics, just that everything felt so wrong all of a sudden."

"So you didn't… Top, or whatever it is that you called it." Her gaze was directly on him and Edward's lips quirked in an awkward semblance of a smile. How could she even stomach having his conversation? He was hardly able to keep his lunch down, not that he could remember the last time he ate.

"No, it never went that far. I didn't reciprocate in any way. I left pretty much after I realized what I was doing. It wasn't right, Bella. I should never have gone to him."

"I pushed you," she whispered.

"No, you suggested. I should have had a clearer mind and seen what the effect would be on you. I don't know if we can move forward from this point, but I want you to know that I want to try. You're it for me, Bella. I'm in love with you and I love you. I did a really stupid thing." It was getting harder to breathe as Edward throat felt so tight, his windpipe failing to do its job.

"You shouldn't have to change for me," she protested, her eyes brimming with tears.

"I don't have to change who I am for you because I am nothing without you."

"Edward…" Bella sighed.

Feeling desperation run wildly through his veins like water tumbling though a pipeline, he couldn't take her reasonable tone anymore. It sounded so… Empty. He leaned his forehead against the mattress. "Please, Bella. I know I fucked up. I was afraid because I didn't understand how much I am in love with you. I'm so fucking sorry I cheated on you. Please just stay here. You can have the master. I'll move into the spare bedroom. I'll give you all the space you need, just don't leave me, please. Forgive me. I know it will take time. Just please." Words, pleading words, just tumbled out of his mouth and he had no wish to stop them. He just wanted her with him, selfish as that was. He raised his head from the bed and tears had begun to fall effortlessly. He was desperate.

He felt her fingers on his cheeks, catching the small drops that washed down his face. Then her hand gently weaved into his hair. Her touch felt incredible and so soothing. It was a balm to all of his aches and pains. He needed her so much, but he had no one to blame but himself for the state their relationship was in.

"I was thinking…" she hedged, while still combing her fingers through his hair. "I've been trying to be this brave and open minded person. I liked that person, but deep down, I think I ended up biting off more than I can chew. I don't blame you for what happened with Ben because I think I knew it would get physical. I thought I could handle setting you free, but I can't. I've lost my footing, Edward. I'm so lost…" He heard her swallow. "I think I need to go home… To Forks."

Edward's head fell down defeated and a wordless cry of agony fell from his mouth.

oooooOOOOooooo

**AnnaLund warned me and called me a mindfuck, huh, the nerve. *bats lashes***

**You know where to find the review button.**

**Chartwilightmom and AnnaLund lent me their wonderful skills, pre-read, held my hand and wiped my tears when I was going mental. Dazzled Eyes22 patiently weeded out all of my typos. I can't thank you all enough. **

**Tomorrow Bella is back.**

**Twitter is where you can find me. Elvirina_Nelly**

**XOXO**

**Nelly**


	59. Day 30, Wednesday, Bella

**I came up with the plot, but as we all know Stephenie Meyer owns Edward. Sad, but she does.**

**Once more you grace me with your comments. I get a high from reading them. Thank you. I apologize for not answering today, but the family is home so that leaves little time for me. **

**One thing in general I will voice my opinion on is that from many comments I have an overall difference of opinion. To me, a blowjob, cunnilingus, any kind of oral **_**IS**_** in fact sex, whereas a lot of you refer to it as **_**'it isn't real sex'.**_

**I hope you're still enjoying my story, though one person commented that it was getting at bit dull. *smirks***

oooooOOOOooooo

**Day 30:**

**Wednesday**

**Bella**

She really meant it. She did. Going back to Forks seemed like the perfect solution to regain her footing. Her father always had a way of helping Bella keep her feet firmly attached to the ground. Right now, that seemed more appealing than ever since it felt like both her legs were floating weightlessly and aimlessly around in the air.

"I suppose you will fire me, if I leave," Bella said carefully, while trying to force down some of the eggs, bacon, toast and juice that Edward had set out of their breakfast.

He gave her an incredulous look. "Does that mean you plan to come back?" In his tone, Bella picked up on the carefully controlled hope. Yesterday, Edward hadn't held back telling her how he felt. His words had been beautiful and more than she could ever wish for, but when her own mind was so hazy, it was hard to know what was real and what wasn't.

Was she leaving for good? She realized that she had no clue. "I don't know." She poked at the eggs with her fork, not able to bring anymore into her mouth. Her appetite was nowhere to be seen. "I just don't know anything."

Edward set his glass of juice down again without having taken any of it. "Can I just say something here? Why exactly do you want to leave L.A.? The first time we spoke about it you said that you were enamored with the city. If I'm the reason you feel like you need to leave, then leave me and not the place that makes you happy. I really don't want you to leave me, but I don't want you to sell yourself short because I fucked up. If you really feel like Forks is the best place for you, then I won't try to stop you… I just want you to do what is best for you, not what you think you should do as a result of me hurting you."

Bella stared at him. He was right, wasn't he? Her mind was so cloudy. It was a little clearer today, but it was still foggy as hell. Yesterday had been a complete mess. She could hardly remember the morning, but crying in front of everyone at the office, she would have a hard time forgetting.

"I don't know," she answered meekly.

"Take some time to think about it, Bella. There's no rush."

She tilted her head into her hands, like a child trying to hide from her parents by shielding her face. "I just don't know," she whispered as her throat started to feel tight and tears made a comeback. Of course she so stupidly thought on Monday that she could handle anything thrown at her and that she had all the answers, but now, she had nothing. She even lost the ability to think straight. More importantly, before Monday, at a moment as vulnerable as this, Edward wouldn't have hesitated to step to her side and hug her. He used to hug her even if she looked sad for a fraction of a second, now he sat stoically on the other side of the breakfast bar with a pained expression on his face. He didn't come to her now when she needed him the most. It had been like that all night. She had needed his arms to encircle her and make her feel safe and warm, but instead there was a polite distance to his body, while lying still on the other side of bed.

"Bella, please take the day to think about it. Stay here or go for a walk. Perhaps, go to a spa and get a massage. Anything to make you feel better," Edward offered. "I can stay home with you if you want."

Bella's eyes widened. "You can't, Edward. Kim is coming in today and you need to be in the studio with her. Don't break her heart and enthusiasm because I'm being difficult."

"Sweetheart, you are not being difficult at all," Edward said sincerely. She couldn't help but smile at the term of endearment that rolled so effortlessly from his lips. She wasn't sure he even noticed it.

"Okay, if you promise to go to the label and have an awesome day in the studio, then I promise I'll take the day to think about what I am going to do, okay?"

"Okay," Edward agreed looking somewhat coerced into leaving the apartment.

As Edward was putting on his shoes out in the hall, Bella stood still in her pajamas that in fact was Edward pajamas and watched him with tears in her eyes. "Why won't you hug me anymore?" she whispered.

They were still stuck in that awkward and silent aftermath of the storm. The time when it was unbearably quiet compared to the roaring wind. They were still lingering in the debris, while assessing the damage.

Edward looked up at her, totally shocked. His mouth fell open and his brows furrowed. "You still want me to do that?" he set his foot down.

Bella snorted and ran her hand under her nose. "I think I need a hug more than I ever did," she mumbled. Edward moved the second she stopped talking bringing her into his arms. Once in the safety of his embrace, she could relax, just a little bit, despite what had happened. She clutched her hands to his shoulders, while burrowing her face into his chest. He smelled so good.

His arms around her were strong and the hand tangled in her bed hair felt heavenly.

"I love you, Bella. So much. I may never have said it before it's too late, but it doesn't mean that I don't feel it." She felt the light pressure of his lips to her hair.

Bella sniffled into his chest, wanting nothing more than to say it back, but in her heart of hearts she wasn't ready yet.

Doing exactly as Edward suggested, Bella used the morning to treat herself to a deep tissue massage. The soft clucking of the tacky music and the constant pressure of hands working over her muscles left her with a lot of time to think… with a clear mind.

During the hour and a half long massage, Bella found her solution.

It would give her something to do for the rest of the afternoon.

She emailed Edward from her phone, telling him what time and place to meet her.

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**Decisions, decisions…**

**Sorry to leave you hanging her for the second day in a row… is it third… forth… I can't seem to remember. Be a sweetheart and it that review button and I'll try to do better with my answers. **

**Chartwilightmom and AnnaLund, pre-readers extraordinaire are my besties for this story and Dazzled Eyes22 betaed. Thank you.**

**Twitter Elvirina_Nelly.**


	60. Day 30, Wednesday, Edward

**I chased the plot bunny, Stephenie Meyer cooked up Twilight. **

**Thank you all so much for all your comments. I can't believe the number of reviews on this story. Thank you so much.**

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**Day 30:**

**Wednesday**

**Edward**

Edward pressed the intercom button again. "Start over, from the top, please."

Kim Maddi was in for a few recording tests, trying to determine what range her voice really had and where she needed to practice. Edward closed his eyes, while listening to the rusty tenor in her voice as she sang. God, she was good.

Being busy and working with someone so young who was humble and knew her elbow from her ass was a godsend on a day like this. Had it been anyone else, Edward wouldn't have been able to account for his temper.

While Edward was listening, half of his mind was still focused on Bella.

The room went quiet again.

"Thank you, Kim. I think that's it for today," Edward said and released the button again.

"Mr. Cullen. Would you mind if I just sat in here for a while?" Kim's disembodied voice sounded from the booth. He looked at her questioning why. "I just need to sort a few things out in my head. Perhaps get them down on paper."

Sort a few things out in one's head. Boy, did Edward know that feeling. "Take as much time as you need, Kim. Working on some lyrics?" He asked.

"Yeah, they're in my head. I just can't get them to sound right, you know?"

Edward nodded leaving the studio and Kim behind. He had efficiently been able to avoid Angela until now because she had half a day off. As she sat at her desk now he knew he was out of luck. "Hey, Ang," he greeted her as cheerfully as he possibly could and quickly turned into his office.

"Edward." She held up a white box with one hand, while still dotting down some notes with the other. "I got you a new phone." She stood, while going directly to his office handing him the box.

"Thanks," he mouthed and started to unpack it. With all that had been going on, he hadn't had time to procure one himself. He peered up at Angela, who was just standing still and staring at him.

"Is Bella okay?" She asked after a moment.

_Yeah, she peachy_, didn't exactly sound like a smart thing to say right now. They had all witnessed how she had cried yesterday when she broke down. "Uhm, I told her to stay home today," he hedged in effort not to answer.

"Can I be honest?" Angela asked carefully. "I think she has feelings for you, Edward. Real feelings. I really don't want to see her get hurt because she is such a sweet person. After what happened yesterday, I just don't know what to think. I know it's not any of my business."

"You're right. It's not." Edward cut her off, and instantly he regretted his words. He stopped fiddling with his new phone. His heart was hammering out of his chest having his private life aired like dirty laundry at the office of all places. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. Close the door, Angela, and take a seat, please." The dark haired woman did as she was told. "It's very likely that Bella won't be working here much longer. She's probably going back to her father within the next few days," Edward said quietly, though he tried to maintain the tone of an executive director. It wasn't really working.

Angela looked down. "So it happened again," she mused, hardly entertained by the thought.

"It's not Bella's fault. I'm the one who messed things up, okay. Just don't blame her or think that she did anything wrong."

"Can I ask what happened?" Angela's tone was nothing but genuine.

"It's personal. Just don't be surprised if she doesn't come back, okay? I hate for you to lose her, but we'll see what happens," Edward said, trying to keep the agony out if his voice.

"Okay." Angela acquiesced.

Firing up his email, he instantly went for the one saying Isabella Marie Swan.

**Meet me at the entrance to the museum at La Brea Tar pits at 3PM.**

Edward checked his watch. It was already 2.15. The email had been sent hours ago. "Hey Angela, I'm leaving for the day." With that, he was running for the elevator.

When he arrived at the museum with five minutes to spare, Bella was already waiting for him. He was pleased to see that she looked so much better. Her hair was tied back in a ponytail. She was wearing a button down with a pair of shorts, her usual sneakers and a rather large backpack of his.

"Hey," Edward said softly. She smiled up at him, beaming.

"Hey back." She looked down for a moment. "I hope it's okay that I dragged you from the office like this."

"Don't even worry about it," Edward said looking at the bag she was carrying. "You want me to take that?"

"You wouldn't mind? It's kind of heavy."

Hefting the bag over his shoulder, Edward realized that Bella wasn't joking when she said it was heavy. "Jeez, what have you got in here?"

"You'll see," she said, while trekking off in the direction of one of the pits. Walking around in small circles on one of the grassy areas, she finally spoke. "I think here's good." Bella looked up at the sky, before gesturing for the bag and he handed it to her. Edward watched her get down to her knees to unpack.

"We're having a picnic?" he concluded.

Bella shrugged. "Yeah. I thought it could be nice. Besides, I read somewhere once that it's wise to feed the man before delivering some big news." She squinted as she looked up at him. "Have a seat." She patted the blanket next to where she sat.

Edward stared feeling somewhat helpless as she picked out bread, cheese, fruits, and what looked to be apple cider. She came prepared. They ate in silence. Edward didn't really know what to say because he was mostly just waiting for the kiss of death. Ever since he met Bella, he realized that he could still be nervous as a schoolboy.

Secretly, he was glad to watch Bella as she chewed her way through at least half of the food. It had been days since he'd seen her eat. She brushed off her hands and then pushed a few crumbs away from her shorts. She stretched out on the blanket next to Edward. Her feet only reached his shins.

"Now to what we're really here for," Bella said carefully, while shrewdly assessing Edward's face. It wasn't like she was going to tiptoe around the elephant between them. It was clear as day that she had come to some sort of conclusion. Edward was just clueless what that would be. Right now, he could only enjoy her company and hope for the best.

Edward smirked, despite his nerves. "So you have an ulterior motive?"

"I'm a woman. I always have an ulterior motive," she deadpanned. "I'm just kidding. No, I figured out that you were right. If I go home to Forks now, it wouldn't be because I was running to a place that I wanted to be. I would be running from you, just like you said. I don't want to do that, so I've decided to stay here in L.A."

Edward swallowed convulsively. This didn't sound good. Here in L.A. didn't exactly include him. His anxiety hadn't eased up one bit when Bella continued.

"When I arrived here, I was so fed up with being quiet and predictable and I did everything in my power to change that, while kind of going on a self discovery trip. It's been good, but I took it too far and I lost myself somewhere in the process. It's not a pleasant feeling and it makes me feel that I've lost my roots and I need to find those again.

"What happened with you and Ben, I don't think I need to forgive you for that because I am just as much to blame as you are. I knew you were vulnerable and confused about your sexuality, so instead of supporting you, I pushed on a point where you felt so lost. I was wrong in doing that. I should have been patient, supportive and given you time and space to let you figure out what you feel instead. As much as you made a huge mistake, so did I. In hindsight, which is annoyingly 20/20, you shouldn't have gone to Ben, but I shouldn't have asked you to go either. To make a long story short, I don't think you need to ask for forgiveness for what happened because we both messed up."

Edward couldn't help his incredulous stare at Bella. The way her mind worked was sometimes like an enigma. For her to claim responsibility for what happened alongside of him was nothing short of amazing. He still felt he needed to be forgiven, but the way she laid down her side of the story, it felt like he would insult her by beating that poor horse all over again.

He cleared his throat as he kept staring at her. "Where does that leave us?" He tried to control the insecurity in his voice, but he was so hopeful all of a sudden; in the pit of his stomach there nothing but a wish for them to work things out.

Bella looked at his hand briefly and then slowly linked her fingers into his. "That's the crux of the matter." Her eyes were honest and vulnerable when they met his. "So much has happened lately. I moved to L.A, I lost all my belongings, I almost died in a fire, I went on my first day with a woman and that is just a part of it." Bella paused. "I love you. I have no doubt about that. Along with everything that happened between us, we were so busy taking it slow that we didn't see how fast we were really going. We didn't see the forest for the trees and we smacked right into them. We've known each other for a month. For more than a week of that month, you had a boyfriend. You were with a kind man you cared for and who you saw a future with. I went from never even having kissed anyone to losing my virginity. I think we got too caught up in what felt good." Bella paused, taking an uneasy breath. "So what I think we need to do is that we should go back to being friends… for a while."

Edward looked down, feeling disappointment starting to smother him like a thick blanket. This was the end after all.

"Look at me." Bella's soft and caring voice brought him out of his tailspin into the abyss. She waited for him to look her in the eyes again. "I'm not saying that we end things. All I'm saying is that I think we should backpedal a bit. I need to figure out who I am again. I need to trust myself to make good decisions once more and I think you need time to come to terms with the fact that you say you want to be with me."

Edward rolled his eyes. "It's not just something I am saying."

"I know. I didn't mean it like that. I just think that we both need time, so we won't smack into those trees again. I know we have a connection. We have very strong feelings for each other and we let ourselves get sidetracked by that. What that translates to is that I don't think we should rush… Making love again. I want to at some point. I just don't think right now is the right time for you or for me." She bit down on her lip. "If it's okay with you, that we don't… Have sex for a while and just be like when I first came to stay with you?"

Edward stared at her wide eyed. "I don't care," he rushed and then groaned when Bella's mouth popped open and he saw hurt in her eyes. "I mean… I do, but right now, I don't care. I think you're right. You're absolutely right saying that we went ahead of ourselves. If you want to be with me, the rest doesn't matter. I just want to have you any way that I can."

"It might take a while for me to get my bearings again." Her forehead creased with insecurity.

Edward nodded, while rubbing his chin. "Take all the time you need." That chokingly tight feeling he had had in his chest for days was crumbling and slowly falling apart. It was easier to breathe all of a sudden, but he still had things to say. "I don't think I ever stressed that Ben means nothing to me. Well, he does, but not the way that you do. I know now that I'm not in love with him as I thought. It's all you. I just wanted to put that out there."

Bella nodded a little, looking thoughtful. After a moment she smirked. "I pretty much figured that out with all your groveling yesterday."

Edward laughed. He had pretty much gone all out. He watched her in the sunlight for a moment and the way the rays danced over her slightly flushed cheeks. "What I'm a little confused about is where will you stay in the meantime? Now that we are back to being friends…" Edward hedged. He knew how he wanted this, but Bella was the one holding all the cards.

Bella's voice wasn't as assertive anymore, but kind of small and feeble. "I was hoping that I could still stay with you. I'll pay rent, utilities and food, but I really want to stay with you. With one small change" She paused.

"What's that?"

"For a while, I think I'll take the spare bedroom. Simply to be wise about things and not plow down the same path once again. I think time and space are of the essence." She looked at him cautiously and Edward was unable to hide his frown. This wasn't exactly what he wanted, but for now he would take it.

Edward gave her hand a small squeeze and rolled to his side. "I like that idea, well not the paying rent part, but us still living together. I don't think I could bare it if you weren't at the apartment anymore. However, if you insist on those sleeping arrangements, I'll take the spare, you take the master."

Bella frowned. "It isn't as much the sleeping as it is that I was hoping to create a small space that was my own. A room that was mine and that means paint and book shelves and purple sheets that I picked out."

Edward nodded. "Now I get it. As it is now the place is all mine, my stuff. You need yours, too. Of course you can have the room and please feel free to do with it whatever you want." Internally Edward smiled. There was the strong and assertive girl that he had fallen in love with. She stood up for herself and demanded what she needed.

"I think I'd miss you too much if I didn't see you before work everyday." She grinned.

Edward smiled softly, bringing his other hand up to stroke her cheek. "You're adorable, but you have such a lame sense of humor. I love it… I love you," he whispered.

"I love you, too."

"I just have one more question. Being friends and all, can I kiss you, or is that off the table, too?"

Bella blushed. "We should just be careful, okay. I may not think I need to forgive you for what happened with Ben, but I am hurt about it." She looked down. "This plan may seem so easy on paper, but in reality I think our battle has barely begun. However, I don't think a small kiss would hurt." She added playfully.

"I'm so sorry I ever hurt you," he murmured, while feeling the heavy thudding in his chest. In spite of things he gently leaned over and kissed her, just a small, chaste kiss. "You are positively the most spectacular woman I have ever met. You managed to sum up all of our mistakes and plan out how to get back on track within the time span of a few hours. You truly are amazing."

"Well, I was pretty busy," she countered snidely.

That afternoon, while lying on the grass at the La Brea Tar pits, Edward felt like the luckiest man in the world. It didn't get much better than this.

oooooOOOOooooo

**Are the kids making the right decision? Tell me what you think.**

**Chartwilightmom and AnnaLund pre-read, and Dazzled Eyes22 bataed this story.**

**Thanks to Nicoconsd for info on L.A. and La Brea Tar Pits.**

**I don't think it's a secret that this story is coming to an end. Only two chapters to go, but I am cooking up something different. More on that later.**

**See you tomorrow.**


	61. Day 31, Thursday, Bella

**I wrote, SM owns, unfortunately.**

**Thank you so much for all the comments I received yesterday. I'm weirdly happy to hear that so many of you will miss this story. **

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**Day 31:**

**Thursday**

**Bella**

"So… uh, what are we going to tell people at the office?" Bella asked as they were getting out of the car in the morning.

"Whatever you want. I'm okay with trying to hide it and us being out in the open. What do you feel comfortable with?" Edward asked as he locked up the car.

"I don't really want to hide it, but I don't want to be considered the boss' bimbo either. I basically just want to work, have people know about us, and still be respected and treated the same. You think that's possible?" Bella batted her lashes playfully.

"I think that we can be discreet, but not hide it. We could try that on for size?" Edward suggested as they walked into the office building. Edward took her hand, twining their fingers and giving it a small squeeze before he let go again.

That was discreet.

Bella couldn't help but glance around for Ben. She caught Edward doing the same. In the past, Ben had somehow seen them together several times when it was so unfortunate. Luckily, he was nowhere to be seen today.

"Have you talked to Ben?" Bella asked carefully.

Edward made a face. "I haven't told him anything. It didn't feel right contacting him without having spoken to you about it."

Bella took a deep breath, focusing on what was the right thing to do instead of wallowing in her own hurt. "You want to tell him about us?" Bella asked when they waited for the elevator.

"You think I should?"

She shrugged. "Well, depending on how you left him the other night, maybe it would be better for him to know." The elevator dinged and the doors sliding open. "I know he's a nice man, Edward. Whatever happened in our little threesome, I don't hate him. I don't even dislike him. I think I understand him and if he's hurting, I think we should try to be as tactful as we can."

"Beautiful and selfless. I'll text him," Edward finished.

A few people were milling into the elevator. A blond man stepped closer to Bella, inadvertently placing himself between her and Edward. "Excuse me," he murmured.

Bella offered a small smile and looked down to the floor, while studying her shoes.

"You going up to Aro's, too?" The blond man asked. Bella looked up wide eyed. "The audition. I thought you might be reading for Katniss," the stranger continued. Bella blinked in confusion. "I'm reading for Gale. You kind of look like her, you know?"

"Who's Katniss?" Bella finally managed to pipe out at his questions. The man staring down at her was quite attractive. He was as tall as Edward with masculine features to die for. Not that she was looking, but a woman always knew handsome when she saw it. She glanced sideways at Edward catching him staring at her.

"The Hunger Games?" The blond filled in, reclaiming her attention.

"Oh, I heard about that. Is it any good?" Bella asked in return.

"I think so." The man held up what looked to be a script. "Good enough to make it to the big screen. You're really not reading today?" The blond man flashed an all American smile, His blue eyes lighting up. Okay, handsome, forget that, he was a stunner." I'm Connor, by the way."

Bella laughed. "No, Connor, I'm not reading. I work in the building. I couldn't act to save my life." The elevator stopped and the doors opened soundlessly. "This is me. Good luck with your audition," she offered when the doors closed again.

Edward narrowed his eyes at her. "God, I hate that I have so much competition."

"Like I don't," Bella countered, teasingly. "Don't tell me you didn't notice that guy." Edward rolled his eyes, while trying to suppress his smirk. "You think he was hot…" she taunted.

"Really? Are we ready to joke about this, Bella?"

"I don't know, but it will much easier to get pass all the grief if we use a little humor," she suggested bashfully.

"Whatever, but he was hot, I admit." He paused, looking down at her with his intense green gaze. "I may think a guy is attractive, but I'm not stupid enough to make the same mistake twice. I'm yours and I always will be."

"I wasn't implying…" Bella mouthed, feeling shocked that he seemed to be getting the wrong impression.

"I know you weren't. I was simply stating a fact." He took her hand and kissed the back of her palm in front of everyone in the office.

"So much for being discreet," she murmured and bit back her pleased smile. Then she set about her day at the office. "Hi Angela." The _yeah I _had_ a whopping big secret_ didn't need to be said. Angela's face said it all. Bella had some explaining to do.

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**Give me your thoughts today, lovelies. Review, make my day.**

**I brought the Hunger Games into this, but worry not, it won't be a crossover. However, Connor will have some relevance in future developments. Nuff said.**

**Chartwilightmom, AnnaLund and Dazzled Eyes22 all helped to make this story possible.**

**XOXO**


	62. Day 31, Thursday, Edward

**Stephenie Meyer created Edward, Bella and Benjamin, but I wrote this story and own the plot.**

**Yesterday I forgot to mention that the Hunger Games is a wonderful trilogy written by Suzanne Collins. The first movie is coming out this March. If you don't know these books, check them out.**

**Thank you for all your wonderful comments. I treasure every single one of them.**

**Here's the last chapter.**

**Enjoy.**

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**Day 31:**

**Thursday**

**Edward**

Every single word that was said between the girls seated right outside of Edward's office, he followed surreptitiously. Angela hadn't really gone for the throat, but then again, that wasn't her style.

So once and for all, Edward decided to put Angela out of her misery. She was Bella's friend and had been working for him for years. Besides that point, Edward had nothing to hide. He did a shitty thing that was private, but that didn't in any way mean, Bella should feel like he was hiding her because he wasn't. The only thing he was slightly worried about was the respect of their co-workers and wholeheartedly on her behalf. Nobody should think she got off easy because she was dating the boss. However, so far, Bella was completely holding her own. She already had the respect and trust of her colleagues, but that didn't mean they couldn't share lunch.

Edward leaned against Bella's desk, smiling at the look of concentration on her face as she was efficiently typing out several emails.

"Do you have time to grab some lunch with me?" he asked softly.

Bella yelped, clearly startled out of her focus. Angela was inconspicuously glancing at them out of the corner of her eye.

"Uh, yeah. Give me a few minutes," Bella answered warily.

"Of course." Edward waited patiently while Bella finished. He kept meeting Angela's eyes, which were filled with questions. "Ask, Angela," Edward encouraged.

His dark haired assistant looked him straight in the eye. "I'm not even sure that's wise, because I am just about every shade of confused."

Edward laughed. "Well, that understandable, but I assure you you're not the only one."

"So you two, are you an item?" Angela asked with disbelief.

Edward watched Bella blush crimson and fumble her phone into her purse. "You could say that," he answered after a moment.

Angela rubbed her face with her hands before she frowned at Edward. "I thought you didn't date women."

"Yeah, well I thought that too," Edward answered. "You ready, Bella?" he asked when he knew more questions would surface. Some things still remained within the frame of privacy.

"Yes. Let's go," Bella answered, while her face was still burning red. She headed straight for the elevators.

"Pastrami?" Edward asked when he was about to order at the local sandwich shop. Bella nodded in affirmation. "Two pastrami sandwiches to go and two waters, please." He looked at Bella, reaching out and stroking the soft skin of her neck. Every time that he looked at her, he thanked the higher powers that she was still with him, and that she still believed in him. "I thought we could sit down at the park across the street."

"I like that idea," she answered softly, leaning into his touch.

Edward watched Bella carefully unwrap her sandwich. "Was it okay that I told Angela like that?" he asked.

Bella took a small bite of a slice of cucumber. "It's fine. Perhaps she'll stop staring at me like I've grown a second head for the rest of the day," Bella said snidely. "Though, I don't really blame her."

"Yeah, me neither," Edward acquiesced.

"Did you talk to Ben?" She asked, fishing out another slice of greenery from between the layers of bread.

Edward nodded apprehensively. "Yeah, I got in touch with him, but I asked if he would see me instead," he explained slowly, trying to ignore the queasiness of betrayal lodged in his stomach. "It felt shitty and coldhearted explaining what's going on in a text." He wasn't heartbroken over Ben in any way, but the thought of hurting this generous and kind person still made him sad. Edward knew exactly where he stood with Bella now, but telling Ben the truth was still a bit like having your fingers jammed in a door and waiting for it to slam. The anticipation was hell.

Bella peered up at him, her eyes were wary. "So what did he say?"

Edward fished out his phone, pushing up the text box. "Have a look."

"You don't have to show me," she refused.

"I want to." He handed her the phone. He watched her carefully as Bella read. He knew exactly what the message said. There were several.

**Hi Ben. Could I see you? There are things to be said. Edward.**

**.**

**Not to be rude, but I'd rather not.**

**.**

**Okay, I understand. I will say it here then. There's no excuse for what I did the other night. I never meant to lead you on or leave like I did. I just want you to know that I'm sorry for all the hurt that I've caused you. I'm not really sure how to say this, so I'm just going to rip off the band-aid. Bella knows everything that happened between us, but we are still going to try to work things out. I thought you should know. Once again, I truly am sorry. I hope you can forgive me for how I treated you. Edward**

**.**

**Thank you for thinking about me and being considerate. I have to say I'm not surprised you chose her. I knew I was fighting a losing battle. Don't feel bad, Edward. You were more honest with me than most men would have been. What's done is done and some day this will all be water under the bridge and it won't hurt so much. Tell Isabella that I'm sorry for what I did, too, because after you met her, your heart was never mine it was always hers. I wish you the best of luck. Ben**

Bella was completely silent as she switched off his phone. Edward pondered for a brief moment. "In some ways, you two are a lot alike. You're both unbelievable selfless."

"Maybe it's like what Ben wrote. Once this is water under the bridge, we could be… not friends, but be people who won't do everything to avoid each other," Bella said, while picking at the bread of her sandwich.

Edward could see the reason in that. Ben wasn't a person you could hate and with time tension would undoubtedly ease up. "Maybe."

Bella put her half eaten food aside and leaned back. "So Edward, what is the conclusion to all of this?"

"What do you mean?" Uncertainty suddenly made a comeback.

Bella took his hand, kissing his fingers slowly. She peered up at him. Her beautiful brown eyes regarding were him with nothing but love. "Your confusion, I mean. If we're going for labels, are you gay, bi or straight?"

Edward returned her gesture and kissed the palm of her hand. "I was thinking about that this morning after you joked about that guy. I think I figured out why I have doubted myself all of this time."

"Really?" Bella's brows shot up.

"Yeah. The reason for all of this uncertainty and confusion is because the person I am supposed to spend my life with is of the opposite sex, which was something that I never expected. I had this doubt my entire life simply because a part of me knew you were out there. You are my soul mate and you just happened to be a woman. It's an extraordinary thing to meet someone who you can bear your soul to, who will accept you for who you are. I know that we're supposed to be together and I think you're the only woman in the world I could want or wish for a life with."

Bella smiled softly, before leaning in for a kiss. "I'm your soul mate? I didn't know you believed in that," she whispered. "When we first met, I was so sure that you hated me. I was all thumbs and always getting in your way."

"How can I not think you're my soul mate? It's like you make every cell of my body sing and stand at attention. Since the first day I met you, it's been that way. You're my cantante. I will admit those first days after we were introduced, you irritated me and not because I disliked you in any way, but because then I already felt the connection between us and I had no clue in hell what to do about it. Meeting you threw me off the deep end. I'm sorry I acted like suck a jerk."

Bella looked at him amused. "You don't have to apologize for that."

"Maybe not, but it's still right, even if it's only for good measure. When you came into my life, I wasn't looking for a change. It got me to Monday night to accept that my life had already changed irrevocably. I love you, Isabella. You are my life now." Edward weaved his fingers into her soft hair when she leaned her head to his shoulder.

"Would it be too much to ask for this to last forever?" She sighed sounding absolutely content.

"Forever is only the beginning, sweetie," Edward murmured and kissed the top of her head.

oooooOOOOooooo

**This is the last chapter of this tale. It's been a trip to explore, write and create these characters. And then get to read all of your beautiful comments. From the very beginning there has been a group of you showing me your undying support and I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I am so deeply touched that you have cared enough to review every single chapter.**

**I have an epi in the workings and it will follow, hopefully within two weeks or so. **

**To those of you who like Ben, no matter what he did to drive a wedge in between Edward and Bella, his story will be told. The man has grown on me and I need to give him a life. The companion piece will have an alert attached to this story when I start posting. I hope to see you name again in reviews.**

**Lastly I have three people to thank. **

**Chartwilightmom, who was with me from the very beginning when this plot bunny was nothing but a figment of my imagination. **

**Dazzled Eyes22, who was brave, outspoken and called me out when I made the same mistake as Bella and lost myself. I owe her a lot and especially an apology. So sorry, D. She is also the one with the patience for all my mistakes. **

**AnnaLund, who came a bit late into the show, but she has shown that she has a sharp mind, is wicked wordsmith, works very well as a safety net for last minute changes, but above all she is a loyal friend with words of encouragement at all times. **

**XOXO**

**Nelly**


	63. Epi, Part 1

**Stephenie Meyer wrote… blah blah, you know the drill.**

**It's been a little longer than expected, so sorry for that, but the epilogue just got soooo long. With that said, this last part will be updated in 8 posts. So keep up, because I hope to have everything out there before tomorrow night. **

**Acknowledgement will happen after the last post.**

**This is the first part.**

**Enjoy**

oooooOOOOooooo

**Three months later**

**Edward**

Isabella sat with her head in her hands and her eyes slowly drooped closed as they ate dinner. Edward watched as she mindlessly pushed the vegetables around on her plate.

"You okay, honey?" Edward asked.

"Something's wrong," she answered quietly. She rubbed her eyes, while taking a deep breath.

A small panic crept through Edward. "Can you explain what you mean by _something_?"

"I don't feel right. I feel weird. I don't feel sick or anything, but just not right. I'm so tired. All I can think about is sleeping. I want to sleep," Bella groaned, as she pushed her plate away and flattened her torso over the breakfast bar.

Edward reached out and took her hand, while linking their fingers together. He was instantly relieved that _'something'_ wasn't emotional and had to do with the fact he cheated on her. "Perhaps you should go see the doctor or I could have my father check you out?" he offered.

"You're probably right. I should see a doctor," Bella yawned. "I'm gonna go brush my teeth. Eww, my mouth tastes like metal."

Edward started clearing the table and loading the dishes into the dishwasher. He hated that Bella wasn't feeling well. Thinking about it, she hadn't been feeling that well for a while and she slept like the dead.

He froze. Inside his chest, his heart was slowly picking up pace.

"_Get out, Edward," she croaked before her stomach cramped again. He didn't listen. Placing one hand on her forehead and fisting her hair with the other, Edward stood by her while the dinner they'd shared was flushed down the toilet. _

_Rinsing her mouth out, Bella looked at him through the mirror. "Don't tell me you had the crab, too?" she groaned and leaned her head into her hands. _

"_I did, but I feel fine," Edward answered, while searching for some Pepto-Bismol among the aspirin, iodine and gauze._

That stomach bug had lasted nearly two weeks.

Edward leaned against the counter mentally going over the past weeks.

"_You know what. You spoil me too much," Bella said, as she struggled to zip up her dress. _

"_There's no such thing," Edward refused, while stepping up behind her and pulling on the poor abused zipper to close the dress. That piece of clothing had always been a tight fit and now it seemed to be spray-painted onto her skin._

"_There is such a thing and you seriously need to stop giving into my insane iced coffee and doughnut hole cravings." Bella wiggled her body, like that would make the dress pop into place and stop being so tight. "Can I blame you that I'm getting a little pudgy?"_

"_You're not pudgy, honey, but if it makes you feel better, blame me all you want." He wrapped his hand around her waist and pulled her back to his. Holding her in his arms always made his chest swell with love._

Bella had gained some weight over the past month. It wasn't much and not that he minded at all. He had simply made the observation. The top button of her jeans never seemed to be closed anymore. Edward had never mentioned it to her because telling a woman she had gained weight seemed like a lose-lose situation.

Though, it was impossible, wasn't it? One thing he was suddenly sure of was that her body had changed.

"_I love you," Bella whispered, before their mouths collided again. She whimpered longingly against his lips when he made a meal out of dragging her shirt off. Her breasts had been freed. They looked heavier and the color of her areola was darker than he remembered. The fit of her breast to his palm was somewhat fuller. _

Edward had noticed that. Last night, he had brushed it off with the excuse of a bad memory. It was the first time they had broached the subject of intimacy again. They had kissed a lot and touched to an extent, but they hadn't made love. Ever since blowjob-gate, they had lived as a couple, but intimacy and sex in specific hadn't been on the menu.

It had to be impossible. They had been careful that first and only time. They had taken precautions. Bella had the shot and _he_ used a condom.

Could she really be?

The dull thud against the countertop snapped him out if his thoughts. He stared at the blue box that was right in front of him. He instantly knew the answer was in that unopened box.

"_Wait, Edward." Bella placed her hand on his arm. "I need to get some tampons. Hang on." She quickly escaped to another aisle, but she was back in less than a minute unceremoniously dropping the blue box into a cart. "My period is due soon," she said without further ado. _

Edward looked up at Bella and saw the color draining from her face. "I was looking for a fresh tube of toothpaste and found this," Bella murmured. She dropped down into one of the chairs at the breakfast bar putting her face into her hands. "I thought it was the shot that was messing with my cycle, so I didn't really pay attention."

Edward kicked the dishwater shut. "You know, I was thinking the same thing," he answered quietly.

Bella looked up at him again and she seemed absolutely exhausted. "It's so unlikely that it's almost preposterous. What are the odds?" she paused. "But it makes sense, perfect sense with how I feel."

Edward went around the breakfast bar. He squatted down and took both her hands in his. "I'll go get a pregnancy test, okay?" He tried to keep his breathing even, though his body was suddenly a kaleidoscope of emotions. This was monumental, life changing and all they could do was sit tight and watch their lives change direction so rapidly. "Will you be okay? I'll be back in five minutes."

"Yeah, I'll be fine," Bella whispered.

The short walk to the convenient store around the corner offered the chance to do a little bit of thinking. This wasn't about him, but her. This was about Bella and what she needed right now. The past few months hadn't exactly been easy. Sure, a plan had been hashed out for how to deal with the situation Edward had so stupidly created, but planning and real life never really seemed to agree.

Bella had been angry a lot and even a little furious with him for what happened with Ben. After the anger, the tears came. Sometimes, she let him comfort her, whereas other times, well, not so much. Edward had done everything in his power to atone, but redemption was not something that happened over night. He couldn't say the right words and make all the hurt that he had caused her vanish. No, it took time and his attempts to show her that he loved her that helped them heal as a couple. The last few weeks had been better, but once again, life didn't take into account what Edward had planned and now this.

Bella sat in the same spot when Edward returned. She was staring at the floor without much color in her cheeks. He set the test down on the table sitting down next to her.

"Bella?" he called carefully. She looked up at him and her eyes were dark and bewildered. She didn't say anything. "I want you to know no matter what that test says that I'm here for you. I love you and I'll do anything for you. I hope you know that."

"Thanks," she whispered and picked up the little box, before going into the bathroom. Edward followed.


	64. Epi, Part 2

**The next day**

**Bella**

She chewed her lip until the skin was practically raw. The hospital johnny was itchy as hell and the crackling of the paper that lay over the vinyl irritated her. When would life ever ease up on her and give her a chance? All the things she had gone through over the past three months would have taken at least a decade to happen back in Forks.

Edward was pale and a clear sheen of sweat covering his forehead. His hair was in chaos from his hands finding some sort of vent for his nervous tension by pulling at it every few minutes. Since last night, he had taken to muttering to himself quite a bit.

"Lie back," she was ordered by Dr. Greene. She was so glad she had a female doctor going through this. Hesitantly, she put her legs up and there was a metallic clank of the instruments. She reached for Edward's hand just as she felt the uncomfortable and cool invasion of her body. "Everything looks fine. The cervix is closed and it has a nice bluish color." Bella focused on the pattern on the ceiling because this was so uncomfortable. As soon as it was possible, she put her feet down again. Dr. Greene's eyes were soft as she looked at her. "You ready for an ultrasound?"

Bella swallowed convulsively. "As ready as I'll ever be."

Edward cleared his throat. "So she really is pregnant?" His voice was rough and uncertain.

The doctor smiled cordially. "Yes, Mr. Cullen. Congratulations."

Bella pondered for a moment if _'congratulations'_ was really the right word right now. She wasn't exactly sure this was a good thing just yet. She was still reeling in the shock and her mind was soaring aimlessly through the absurdity of it all. How could this have happened?

Back in her own clothes, she lay down on the bed again and exposed her stomach. The doctor stuck a cloth into the waistband of her jeans and slathered cold goo all over her stomach.

She picked up the magic wand and dragged it through the slippery lube on her stomach. The screen came alive in a mass of gray tones. What the hell was she supposed to make out of that?

"I can see there's a nice strong heartbeat. The arms, legs and abdomen all look good. "It was like the doctor was mostly musing to herself. Bella tried to concentrate in spite of the thoughts swimming around in her head. Edward's hand was like a tourniquet around her fingers.

Last night in her groggy state, she had refused to acknowledge that the test had been right. It had to be a mistake that it was positive. After that, it was like both of them had done everything in their power to talk about anything else but the little pink plus sign screaming from the white stick.

At breakfast, Bella booked an appointment the second that the gynecologist's receptionist answered.

Edward's voice pulled Bella from her inner musings. "Is there something wrong?" he asked, sounding alarmed. That was when Bella noticed the doctor had fallen silent and a small frown had formed between her brows.

"No," she hedged slowly, while concentrating on the screen. She moved the gadget through the goo on Bella's stomach and then began lining it up from another angle. "There you are. You were just playing hide and seek. I thought I saw a glimpse of you." The doctor's tone was animated and cheerful. She turned to Bella. "There is nothing wrong, Mommy. Don't you look so worried. Both of your babies are fine."

_Why the hell was she suddenly using plural?_

"There are two little creatures hiding in here." The doctor smiled.

"What?" Bella gasped, while feeling her stomach churn and her vision blur. She suddenly felt both relieved and gobsmacked all at once. Her breath faltered.

Edward's voice was a weak whisper. "We're having twins?"

"Yes, identical," the doctor confirmed.

Bella spoke through the wooziness she felt and the bile started rising up her throat. "They're fine? Healthy, I mean?" She suddenly realized that was all she wanted. She wished so desperately for them to be healthy.

The doctor set the apparatus aside. "As far as I can see, they are thriving. You've been taking good care of them." She placed a hand on Bella's arm giving it a small squeeze. "The calculation says that you're eleven weeks and six days pregnant."

Bella swallowed tasting the sour echo of vomit before looking briefly at Edward. He appeared to have gone into coma. He stood stock still and didn't breathe. "That sounds about right," she muttered. Eleven weeks and six days would take them back around the time they had made love. Though, that wasn't what she focused on. She needed to come to terms with the fact that she was indeed pregnant and that they were having twins. It was a little much to deal with. Quickly, she grabbed the small towel crammed down the front of her pants and frantically wiped her belly before she sat up. "I don't feel so well."

"Are you feeling faint or nauseated?" The doctor asked.

"Yes," she croaked. She hadn't felt like that for a few weeks now.

"Oh, Edward," she moaned. "Oh…"

Edward was at her side immediately. She leaned her head against his stomach and she felt his hand at the back of her head stroking her hair. "Oh," she croaked again when the floor beneath the bed started wobbling, like a small boat tossed around in a furious sea storm. "I need to throw up."

Edward acted fast by grabbing the small wastebasket next to the door. Her entire lunch made a return and as usual, Edward held her hair out of the way. Feeling slightly better, Edward took the poor trashcan away and handed her some water in a plastic cup.

The doctor squatted down next to her as Bella still leaned against Edward for support. Her head was feeling a little better, but her vision was still swimming. "Don't worry, Bella. This is perfectly natural, especially if you're carrying twins. When you lie on your back, you risk cutting off the blood flow in some major arteries along your spine and you will feel uncomfortable. Just remember to lie on your side and everything will be fine."

"Thanks."

"Do you need a moment?" The doctor asked kindly.

"Yeah." Bella relaxed for a moment as the confirmation of the pregnancy really sank in. The doctor left the room. There was no way of denying it anymore. Twins? Bella raised her gaze to Edward's green and tortured eyes. "I really don't get it. The condom didn't even break? Did it?" she asked, trying to clear up her confusion.

"No," Edward answered softly.

Then, she suddenly couldn't control the words rising up her throat. "Do you have super sperm? Did you tell those little soldiers of yours to just swim right through the condom?" she nearly hissed. This was unbelievable. She knew it wasn't his fault at all, but logic and common sense had gone into hibernation.

Edward's lips quirked at the corners, but he suppressed his smile.


	65. Epi, Part 3

**Later that same day**

**Edward**

"You should eat something," Edward suggested carefully. He was feeling a bit like he was getting a taste of those infamous pregnancy hormones.

Bella raised a set of highly annoyed eyes at him. "If you're going to chase that statement by stating that I'm eating for three now, I'm going to pelt you with…" her voice faltered, as she searched for something on the breakfast bar that she could throw at him.

His lips threatened to pull up at the corners, but he knew that was an unwise decision. In the last seven hours, Bella had succumbed to threatening violence rather often. He blamed the hormones, though he couldn't tell her that either, so he kept his mouth shut.

Bella aimed to take a bite of her food, only to drop the fork and suddenly burst into tears. Edward stared at her in confusion, having no clue what brought that on. She tilted her head into her palms, before sobbing and hiccupping like a child.

In the next second, Edward was out of his seat and walking around the breakfast bar to hold her. She leaned her face against his stomach wrapping her arms around his waist. He stroked her back, hoping to soothe her ailment. "Shhh. What's wrong, honey?"

She looked up at him, practically glowering. "Did it slip your mind that I'm knocked up? With twins?" she replied.

"Oh," he muttered, feeling a little tongue-tied. He guided her face to his chest again, while trying to comfort her and working furiously to come up with something profound to say. He wasn't exactly sure where he stood on the matter himself, but it wasn't his body. They had never even gotten to the point of even discussing if they wanted to have children yet.

Bella sniffled and her ragged breath calmed a bit. "I'm sorry that I'm being such a bitch," she mumbled into his shirt.

"Please don't use that word about yourself. I understand, sweetie. Everything is overwhelming and it's not like we even have a back-up plan for this kind of situation," Edward said quietly.

"What are we going to do? We can't have babies. We're not ready. We're not even having sex for crying out loud. We're too young, too inexperienced and too… something," Bella rambled, while trying to catch the tears washing down her cheeks.

Edward pulled back and his heart plummeted into to his stomach. His entire face fell and it was like the world shook under his feet. "What are you saying, Bella?" Though he hadn't made a final decision if he was happy about this pregnancy, he knew with absolute certainty what he _didn't_ want to do. He figured he just needed a little time to wrap his head around the whole thing. "Are you telling me you want it… taken care of? An abortion?"

Her face distorted and a wail erupted that came directly from her heart. "Noooooo!" Then the flood of tears started all over again. She hiccupped and her shoulders trembled. "They're your babies. I can't… remove something that is yours as much as they are mine." Bella drew a shaky breath. "I just can't see myself as a mother, not yet. I'm not equipped for that kind of commitment. I don't have the gene to be a good mom," she cried.

Edward went back to stroking her hair again and waiting for her sobs to come down to a rational level once more. She was at the brink of hysteria. He kept stroking until she looked up again and her tears were under control.

Edward took the lead determined to make her see what he saw every day. "Let's look at this rationally and we'll go over everything that you are worried about, okay? First off, I love you. I love you more with every day that passes. You also love me. I know you do because you remind me every day. That's a good start in my opinion.

"Besides, I turned twenty-nine and you're twenty-fourth birthday is no so far away. That hardly makes us teenagers. Baby, you're not ill equipped to take care of children. There are two and it's not going to be easy, but you are a strong passionate woman who never does anything halfway and that too is a very good trait for parenting.

If you're worried about money, then don't be. The label is doing well. I know it may be a little tight for a while, but I'll be able to provide for you, the babies… and for us as a family. We'll be okay. We may not have that much space, but I don't think they will care for at least a few years if they have to share a room."

Bella stared up at him with big wet eyes. "How can you be so calm about this?" She snorted using her hands to clean her face the best she could.

Edward couldn't help his smirk. He cradled her face in his hands, while feeling her soft cheeks in his palms. "I don't know, but the concept isn't all that scary… right now anyway," he said softly. He leaned in and kissed her.

Once again, tears started to trickle from her eyes. She snorted a few times and her breath was shaky. She curled her fingers around his, while bringing his hands down to her stomach. "I want to have the babies - your babies, my babies. They are a part of us and I know that, but I am so far out of my depth. I'll be a mess as a mom, but I want them. I love them."

Edward wrapped his arms around her waist, while pulling her into an embrace he feared was a bit too tight for her delicate state. Joy swelled in his chest, so intense he was afraid his ribs would crack.


	66. Epi, Part 4

**Fourteen weeks pregnant**

**Bella**

"Stop biting your nails, Edward. It's a nasty habit you've picked up," Bella said softly.

She watched Edward put his hands back on the steering wheel. He was gripping it so hard that his knuckles turned bone white. He circled around once more, while trying to find a place to park. "You try telling your dad, a police officer who owns a gun, that you accidentally got his only daughter, his precious girl, pregnant. You may not be chewing your nails, but I assure you that bottom lip of yours would suffer."

Bella looked out the window trying to repress her grin. She had never seen Edward this nervous.

"He's going to kill me," he muttered, while finally pulling into an empty spot.

"He won't kill you, honey. I'm not sure he has ever fired his gun in the line of duty."

Edward turned the engine off, while glaring at her. "He hunts though, right?"

"Occasionally," Bella admitted quite reluctantly, while working hard not to laugh at Edward. Besides that, she wasn't exactly sure how Charlie was going to react to this entire situation. He didn't deal with change well.

In the busy arrival area of LAX, Bella had to control an outburst of emotion when her father hugged her. "It's so good to see you, Dad."

Charlie pulled back, while giving her a studious look. "You look good, Bells. Really good. Good to see you finally got some female curves. You look so healthy," Charlie praised. He always thought Bella was on the slender side. She flushed furiously. Okay, so over the past weeks, a few more pounds had snuck up on her, but she was just so hungry all the time. "You're wearing a dress and you look so pretty," he almost cooed at her.

"How was your flight, Dad?" She tried to divert the conversation from the reason she was wearing a dress because there was no chance in hell that she could close her pants anymore and a nice A-shaped dress hid a lot.

"As well as could be expected." Bella knew flying was never his thing.

"Let's go home, Dad. We could have some dinner. Tomorrow, we're going to visit Edward's parents."

Bella and Edward had spent the last two weeks coming to terms with the fact that they were going to be parents. They'd spent nights talking, scouring the internet for answers to any kind of question they had and letting it seep into their hearts and minds about what was coming. That left them both in a place where they were genuinely excited about the babies, who were due in February. Bella didn't worry about the Cullens' reaction, but she was more concerned about Charlie's. They had told Renée this morning and the Cullens' were next at lunch the following day.

After dinner that night, Bella sat next to Charlie at the breakfast bar, while Edward was safely across the kitchen perched against the countertop. Knowing her father's sometimes fragile mind when it came to change, she knew she needed to tell him quietly and not just thrust this on him. She never even told him the truth about the love that had blossomed between her and a certain copper haired man.

"It sure is a nice place you have here," Charlie said, filling the silence with small talk. He had been given what appeared to be Bella's room, which was the spare room that she had redecorated a few months ago. However, she hadn't spent many nights there before she was back in Edward's bed.

"Yes." She looked down, before taking her father's hand. "I have a lot of things to tell you, Dad. I haven't been forthcoming with you lately, but things have changed since the last time you were here."

"What happened, honey? You look sad."

Bella smiled a little. "I'm not sad, not at all. You know how I told you last time that you were here that Edward was gay?" She jumped right in, knowing her father wouldn't appreciate any evasiveness. Edward fidgeted across the room and his breath halted. Charlie's brown eyes were wary when Bella looked at her father. "It's a little hard to explain, but that's not really the case anymore. Edward and I have fallen in love, Dad. It feels good and feels right."

Charlie muttered something unintelligible under his breath, glowered at Edward for what seemed like an eternity and then he spoke up. "I knew you were up to something," he grumbled.

"I'm not up to anything, Charlie. I fell in love with your daughter and I want to be with her," Edward answered sincerely.

Bella tried to tread carefully, but still remained in control of the conversation. "He's a wonderful man and he's very good to me. He takes care of me and I love him." she paused to suck in a huge gulp of air. "There something else you need to know and that's the reason why I asked you to come and see us. I'm pregnant and you're going to be a grandfather."

"What?" Charlie spat.

Bella smiled indulgently, while waiting for her father to regain his composure before she continued. "I'm just past my first trimester and we're having twins," she carefully added, shrewdly assessing whether the vein in his forehead was about to pop.

Charlie sat oddly stiff, while staring at countertop. Then, he looked up and his eyebrows shot skyward. "You have been gone from Forks a little more than three months. How can you be in your second trimester?"

Now, it was Bella's turn to gape. She hadn't expected Charlie to be that quick with the math. She decided to be absolutely honest. "The babies were conceived about three weeks after I got here, and then add two weeks before that and you would basically have the date that I left Forks."

"How the hell could you be so irresponsible, Isabella? I taught you better than this. I know I did."

Edward cleared his throat. "It was an accident. In fact, Bella was very careful about this and so I was. We don't know how the pregnancy happened, but it did. Sometimes life just finds a way." Bella blushed. Well, they knew how it happened, just not how it was possible that the babies were conceived.

Charlie glared at Edward before he turned to Bella. "Oh, sweetheart. This is not what I wanted for you. Having children is a beautiful thing, but like this? I'm not sure. What about dating, falling in love and marriage. All of those are suppose to come before babies. I don't understand anything," Bella's father trailed off, while looking absolutely heartbroken. "Things are completely upside down with _him_."

"I know, Dad." Bella clasped her father's hand. "We know that it's a shock. We were shocked, too, when we found out." Edward moved over and sat down at his usual seat at the breakfast bar. He looked patient and fairly calm now. "Go easy on Edward. It's not his fault and he really does love me. We are in love and dating just like you wanted for me. As for marriage, I don't even want to know if I want to get married. I know this is not the conventional way, but I'm not cheating myself out of anything."

"You say that now, but the story might be different in ten years," Charlie protested.

Edward's voice was calm when he spoke up. "We understand that, but the story might also be the same. No one can tell the future, but we can only hope. I hope for a healthy family and that our kids are happy, safe and playing in the backyard. I hope that Bella and I still feel the same way about each other, while probably loving each other even more because we spent ten years together and that helped us grow stronger. I want all of those things and I'm going to work damn hard to get those things. That's all the promise I can offer. I can't foretell the future, but I can work for it the best I know how." Charlie's expression softened a bit, but he wasn't happy about this. That much was clear. "I love your daughter very much, Charlie. She's everything to me. We may not have planned to start a family so soon, but we're really excited about it. Bella is going to be a wonderful mom and I'll try my damn best to be a good father."

"Of course, Bella will be a good mother, but what about you and… uh, your lifestyle. What changed for you?"

Edward nodded, while thinking for a moment. Bella knew he understood Charlie's confusion about his sexuality. The questions had been like a broken record ever since Bella and Edward came out as a couple.

"The question is easy to answer. Bella changed everything for me and the _why_ is because she's the love of my life," Edward answered with the utmost sincerity. Bella bit back a wave of emotion that brought tears to her eyes. Would she ever get used to being so emotional all the time?

Charlie gritted his teeth. "That answer is too easy. It takes longer than three months to figure out something like that out." The handful of minutes that passed was tense before Bella's father spoke up again. "Do you have a clue what you're getting yourselves into?" Charlie asked and this time his voice was softer.

Edward laughed softly. "Does anyone who are about to be parents for the first time?"

The corners of Charlie's eyes creased as he smiled. "I suppose not."

"Dad, I hope you can be happy for us because we are."

Charlie sighed. "I don't know, Bells." He pulled his hand away. "I need some air. I just… I need some air." He strode out of the room with his shoulders hunched as he walked out the door.

Bella let out a long sigh. "That went as well as could be expected." She stood up, while taking the used plates to the sink. Edward wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her into his lap.

"Your father is a man who knows what he knows and I don't mean that in a bad way, but we knew it was going to be tricky telling him. If we give him some time and space, I'm hoping he'll change his mind."

Bella leaned back into Edward's arms. "I hate that I've hurt him and betrayed the faith that he has in me." she said and looked down at her hands.

"Perhaps, forgiveness runs in the family," Edward whispered. "I happen to know that his daughter is very good at forgiving. Apples don't fall far from the trees, so there is a lot of room for hope," he murmured and placed his hand over the swell of her belly. He'd been doing that a lot lately.

Bella cleaned the kitchen, while anxiously waiting for her father to return. Twenty minutes passed, then thirty, another twenty minutes went by and finally at the hour mark, Bella was going out to look for him.

Going down the hall and out into the evening air, she didn't make it very far. At the front step, Charlie sat stoically watching the cars drive by.

She sat down next to him. "Hey, Dad."

Charlie placed his hand over Bella's, before giving it a gentle squeeze. "Are you happy, Bella?"

She was a little taken back by his direct approach, but she had a clear answer. "I'm very happy," she answered. "Well, I've had two weeks to deal with the shock, but as unbelievable as it may sound, I'm exactly where I want to be in life." She paused. "I just wished that you could be happy for us, too."

"I can, sweetheart. Your happiness means the world to me, but give your old man a few days to digest this news."

Bella placed her head on his shoulder, while inhaling her father's familiar woodsy scent. "Well, you got about six months," she joked.

"I'll get used to it, honey. Don't worry," Charlie said soothingly. "Besides, having grandkids here makes another good excuse to come see you more often. The weather is so nice here." He tilted his face towards the setting sun. "I could get used to this."

"Yeah," Bella agreed, while closing her eyes and savoring the bright rays that landed on her face.

The next day at the Cullens' was easier than expected. Carlisle had already suspected that Bella was pregnant. He was a doctor after all and he had shared that suspicion with his wife. They weren't really so surprised. Alice had been all 'Oh My God' for the better part of an hour and Rosalie found it hysterical that Edward, who was preaching safe sex, needed a lesson in how to use a condom.


	67. Epi, Part 5

**Twenty-one weeks pregnant**

**Edward**

Edward stood in the small nook of the take-out area of the Italian restaurant. He was leaning into the corner waiting for his order. Most people sat outside and enjoyed their lunch. The day was hot, but not a normal scorching L.A. summer day.

"Edward?" A surprised, but familiar voice called.

He lifted his gaze to meet Ben's. "Hey," he greeted quietly. They hadn't talked lately, well not for months to be honest. He wasn't sure if the dark haired man hated his guts or not. Not that it really mattered, since the only interaction they had was greeting each other at the elevators.

Ben smiled. "How are things?"

"Good," he admitted. "You?"

"I can't complain." Ben smirked. "I have the day off… long weekend," he trailed off, while pulling out a few bills from the pocket of his casual shorts. He even wore flip flops. Edward remembered how Ben's shirts were always pristinely ironed or that he never wore shorts. This was different to see him look so casual.

"Sounds nice." The silence was a little tense and Edward didn't really know what to say.

"I hear that Isabella's pregnant," Ben said evenly, then shrugged. "Not that she can really hide it anymore. I saw her yesterday in the lobby." There was no venom in his voice. He just seemed… fine.

Edward chuckled. Perhaps, he didn't need to be so nervous. "Yeah. We're having twin girls in February."

"Wow, double trouble," he grinned. "Well, congratulations, Edward."

Suddenly, a set of tanned arms wrapped around Ben's waist and a blond head ducked into the crook of his neck. "Hey, baby. Is the food ready yet? I'm starving."

Ben cleared his throat and put his hand on one of the blond man's arms. "Hey," Ben mused, as his tenor changed to soft and loving. "Uh, Connor, this is Edward and Edward, Connor," he introduced. The blond peeked up from Ben's neck, while looking utterly shocked.

"Crap, I thought you were alone." The blond immediately released Ben, before taking a step back. His eyes were a bit wary.

"It's okay, Connor," Ben answered. Edward suddenly felt like he was trapped in some sort of personal conversation. Besides that, the blond looked oddly familiar. He just couldn't place him. However, the slightly victorious look in his eyes told Edward that Connor knew exactly who Edward was.

They shook hands and the blond smiled after a moment, before taking a step closer to Ben again. It was like he was evaluating the situation, not from a jealous point of view, but protective of Ben and himself.

"Here you go," the waiter said setting three boxes on the counter. Edward counted up the money, while refusing his change.

He looked at Ben for a moment and felt calm spread though his body. The dark-haired man was okay. He had clearly moved on. "Well, you have a nice weekend," he offered before he picked up the food and left.

Casting a glance over his shoulder, he once again got confirmation that Ben's wasn't hurting over him anymore. No, Ben's eyes were on someone else entirely. The men were smiling and laughing as Edward left the restaurant. It was a weight off his shoulders that he hadn't expected.

As Edward headed back to the office, he carried the warm pizza boxes in his right hand and the Ben and Jerry's chocolate fudge brownie ice cream he just picked up was cold in his other.

As soon as Edward set the pizza boxes down in the small dining area of the office, it was like the smell of the pepperoni summoned Bella. She came flying out of nowhere with a spoon clutched in her hand. Angela wasn't far behind.

"I'm famished," Angela gushed as she plopped down next to Edward ripping open one of the pizza boxes.

"Me too," Bella interjected. She fished out a slice of pizza and hogged the ice cream container.

"You are so not eating that at the same time?" Edward sounded almost appalled as Bella sank her teeth into the first slice of pizza. There was no feminine or dainty way about how she scarfed down all that food.

"Hot! Hot! Hot!" Bella fanned her mouth before digging out a dollop of ice cream and putting it in her mouth. She chewed the two things while Edward stared at her mortified.

"That is so unattractive." Bella glared tartly at him. "Not you. The food, baby."

"This is so good," she gushed and ignored Edward's comment. She swallowed and quickly went for the next bite.

"I can't imagine." His chest swelled with love as it always did when Bella was enthusiastic about something. Yesterday, it had been baby books. Today, it was two different kinds of food that should never be eaten at the same time.

"You try." In one hand, she held up the slice and in the other, the spoon of ice cream.

"Thanks, but I'd rather not. It seems unwise to take food from you," Edward said not putting too much effort into disguising his disgust.

Bella shrugged. "Your loss."

"You're totally right. This is so good," Angela mumbled with her mouth full.

Edward leaned back, while casting a glance over his shoulders. "Hey, Newton. If you plan on having a slice of pizza for lunch, you better hurry. You're battling higher powers here."

Both Bella and Angela gave him a sour glare, but quickly returned to their food.

At that, Mike came rushing and quickly hoarding three pieces for himself. "Thanks for the heads up, Cullen. Jeez, do you have to hide food at your place to make sure you even get to eat?" he joked.

"Ha ha, funny, funny, ha ha." Bella narrowed her eyes at Mike. "You try being pregnant, then you're allowed to make snide comments about food," she snapped. Edward smiled to himself, while thinking about the secret stash of chocolate he had behind the few liquor bottles back at the apartment. If Bella got wind of it, it was gone, no doubt about it. He chose not to comment.

Edward kissed Bella's temple gently before getting up. "I'll be down in Studio B." Since they made no secret of their relationship, they hadn't tried to hide the pregnancy either. The day after the cat was out of the bag, Angela announced that she was expecting too. It was like Angela and Bella were a team now, but internally Edward was thrilled Bella had someone to share her thoughts with, when matters were simply out of his range. He did what he could, but there were some things he would never understand because he simply had one y-chromosome too many.

"Sure," she mumbled around the food in her mouth.

Kim Maddi had been recording all day yesterday and it was time to go over what they had accumulated. So far, Edward was impressed with her lyric writing skills. She really was a diamond in the rough. The rusty tenor of Kim's voice encroached on the small room and Edward closed his eyes listening. The song was far from ready, but it was a really good start.

Peripherally, he caught Bella coming into the studio. She came over and sat down on his lap. "You okay?" she asked softly. "You seemed a little quiet and you didn't eat anything."

He wrapped his arms around her body, leaning his chin on her shoulder. "I'm fine." He took a deep breath. "I just saw Ben," he added quietly. He didn't want to hide it from her and have the encounter blow up in his face at some point. Ben was potentially a deal breaker, when it came to the relationship they had been able to build lately.

Bella's brows shot up. Edward felt somewhat guilty. The last thing he wanted was to hurt her and he saw that Ben might just do that. "How was he?" she asked quietly. She had never really been angry about what happened, but was still somewhat deeply hurt below the surface.

"He was good, I think. I met him, when I picked up the food."

"How does that make you feel?" she asked. She was always so selfless, thinking about him before herself.

"Happy… because he wasn't alone. He was with someone. The guy looked to be a boyfriend, perhaps. He clearly moved on. It was nice to see."

Bella weaved her fingers into his hair and goosebumps rose down his arms. Her touch always felt incredible. "So, no hard feelings?" She bit her lip, while digging her teeth into her flesh.

"Do you mean _any regrets_?" Edward cocked a brow.

"I suppose so," she whispered.

He held her tighter, while feeling her vastly growing baby bump in his hands. It was primordial. A calling to protect and assure those he loved and to make sure that she was safe with him. "None whatsoever. I have exactly what I want and need right here. All my girls."

Bella snuggled into him, while shaping herself to his body. She sighed contently, but didn't say anything right now. She didn't need to. He kissed her hair, savoring the feeling of her warm body against his.

"This song is really, really good," she said after a moment.

"I know. I think we really have something here."


	68. Epi, Part 6

**Thirty-two weeks pregnant**

**Bella**

Bella put the phone down, while smiling and digging the placemats out of the drawer. She set the table for four. It was about twenty minutes later when she opened the door seeing some of her favorite people.

"How are you feeling, dear?"

Bella opened the door wide to let the guests in. "I'm fine, Esme. Thank you for asking."

Rosalie held up a small designer bag that looked like it came from an expensive boutique. "I got this for you. It's the cutest thing ever," she beamed. Bella took the present and peeked inside, before pulling it out. It was a cashmere cardigan in a deep blue color with a small gathering placed just below the bust to accommodate her heavy belly.

"Thank you, Rose. That's so kind of you." Bella said appreciatively, while internally celebrating that Edward loved that color on her. "I'm seriously running out of things I can fit into these days."

"Oh, no worries, Bella. I can make you anything you want." Alice piped in. The raven-haired girl stretched to her toes, before leaving a kiss on her cheek.

Bella blushed feeling a little shy with all the attention from Edward's family. "What are we having for dinner?" she asked, while following the others into the living room where the table was ready and set.

"Chinese. I know it's not very imaginative, but I guess we can all use a greasy meal from time to time." Esme set the bag down and untied the knot. Instantly, the delicious sweet and sour smells spread through the room. Bella's stomach growled and she wasn't about to be picky because Chinese was so much better than the cold cuts she had originally planned on.

"Where's my son?" Esme asked, while looking around the empty apartment.

"He's out seeing some band," Bella answered, while pulling a few cans of sodas out of the fridge.

"Don't you usually go with him?" Esme asked cordially.

"Yeah." Bella made a wry face. "It's just getting a bit uncomfortable to stand up in some of those places. So tonight, I'd rather stay home and indulge myself with a good book."

Edward's mother looked almost panic-stricken. "Oh, I hope were not imposing. You can always say no when we come barging in like this."

"Not at all." Bella waved her off with a gesture of her hand. She truly enjoyed the company of the three women, all for different reasons. Esme made Bella miss her own mom less at times. She was always so warm and motherly. Alice was usually a bomb of energy and if you were a little down, she made you feel so much better. Rosalie always had a snarky comment or a good story to spice up a day. "Let's eat," she announced.

Rosalie didn't disappoint. As they ate dinner, she shared with everyone her latest tale about Emmett, being a high school senior and that the door to her bedroom was finally back.

"Come on, Bella. Give it up already?" Rosalie pleaded.

"No," Bella sternly refused.

"Edward won't know. You can whisper it to me. I won't tell a soul, I swear." She suggested so sweetly it was about to give Bella a toothache.

"Rosalie," Esme admonished.

"Mom, I'm dying here." With that, the blond girl went back to ignoring her mother. "Just tell us the names already. Come on, Bella."

Bella shook her head. "Nope, not until they are born."

Alice checked her phone. "May I be excused?"

Esme smiled. "I think we all need to excuse ourselves and give Bella some space. Is Jasper picking you up, Alice?"

"Yep, he just texted me that he'll be here in five minutes." Alice turned to Bella next to her and her eyes were pleading. "Can I touch your belly?" Edward's sisters were all hands on deck, when it came to their future nieces.

"Uhm, sure," Bella answered hesitantly. This wasn't the first time Alice asked, but at least she asked before she did anything. That wasn't exactly protocol for everyone. Even strangers had on occasion put their hand on her stomach, thinking just because she had a burgeoning shape that they were allowed to touch it. Alice and the family were okay, but not total strangers. However, Alice was insistent that she wanted to feel the babies kick. It was a wonder she had missed it so far, since the babies had a tendency to be very active.

Bella guided her hand down to the lower left side where their hands or feet were sliding around. "Feel that?" Bella asked, when a small movement occurred right under Alice's hand. It wasn't much, but it was a start.

"Oh My God," she squealed. "That's so awesome. Can you make the baby do it again?"

Bella giggled. She couldn't make them do anything. They had a mind of their own. "No."

Another shriek erupted. "Oh My God! There it was again." Suddenly, there were three sets of hands on her stomach feeling the movement coming from inside of her. This one was far more distinctive.

"Oh my, they are strong," Esme said, while her eyes welling with tears. Every time, the subject of the babies came up, she got emotional. Bella figured it was simply because she had so much love to give.

"Yeah, they are," Bella agreed. It was silent for a moment as everyone seemed to gather themselves after the outburst of ecstatic joy.

Alice spoke up first, while starting to clear the plates along with her sister and mother. "Jasper and I were going to the movies. You're welcome to join us, Bella," Alice offered.

"Thank you, but I have a date with a book. I'm just taking it slow tonight," Bella answered, knowing that she didn't really want to go anywhere. She wanted to stay home and enjoy the silence. It was a luxury that she knew she had to give up in the future.

Having said goodbye to the Cullens, Bella put on her new cardigan. It was really pretty and it fit perfectly. She was glad when she could finally curl up on the couch with her new book in hand. It was one Edward had given to her this morning. A cup of tea was placed on the armrest and it sent up a column of steam. As she was barely passing the first page, the front door opened and closed again.

"Edward?" Bella called, while placing the book in her lap.

"Yeah." His smile was warm when he saw her. Edward went straight to the couch and sat down next to her.

"You're home early," Bella commented. Edward removed the book from her lap and lay down his head on her thighs. She instantly started combing her fingers through his hair. Edward closed his eyes for a moment with a small content smile on his lip.

"The band sucked. I stayed there for like four tracks, but then I figured my night would be much better spent staying home with you."

"I thought you said that they used to be good."

"I would stress the '_used_ _to be_'. For some reason, they have a new lead singer and she didn't work out. She was uncharismatic and couldn't hold a tone, even if her life depended on it." He yawned and pressed the side of his face against her stomach. "Have the kids been behaving?"

"So far they have been very good, but let save the final judgment for when we go to bed." Edward snickered with understanding. Every night when Bella was exhausted and just wanted to sleep, that's when the babies decided to wake up. Some nights, it was like a madhouse of arms and legs flailing around inside of Bella's stomach.

He fiddled with the hem of her cardigan. "This is nice. Is it new?" He wore a mischievous grin, as he lifted the fabric just a bit and kissed the base of her belly that was resting on the top of her thighs.

"Rosalie got it for me."

"That was nice of her." Edward nuzzled against her stomach, while Bella kept threading her fingers through his hair. They just looked into each other eyes, as the minutes ticked by.

Bella felt a heavy thud from one of the babies and Edward laughed. "Ouch," he mocked winced and held his eye. "That one almost gave me a shiner."

Bella cocked a brow. "You would look so bad ass with a black eye. Very hot."

Edward narrowed his eyes at her. "You don't mean that."

"No, I don't. I would kiss you right now, if I could bend down that far."

"No, you're not exactly as limber as you used to be." Edward sat up, while placing a sweet chaste kiss on her lips. "You want to kick my ass in a game of Mammoth Scrabble?"

"Anytime, but did you want to have some dinner first? There are some leftovers in the fridge. Your mom brought over this amazing Chinese food."

"Sure, food then we play."


	69. Epi, Part 7

**Thirty-seven weeks pregnant**

**Bella**

It was still early and dawn hadn't come yet. Bella looked at her naked body in the mirror. Her eyes looked a little tired and her face a little jaundiced from the fact that her body was working overtime. Her breasts were much heavier than they used to be, but that was nothing compared to her hugely swollen stomach. Bella wondered whether she was a medical marvel or all women carrying twins were this big. She hadn't gained too much weight. It was just that everything had gathered around her midsection and distorted her usual figure to something that looked like it came out of a horror story.

"Come on. In you go," Edward said softly, nodding his head towards the shower that was running.

Bella took a few deep breaths, before following orders. To ensure that their nerves were under control today, they had planned the morning to the smallest of detail. Edward stepped into the cubical with her as warm water hit and slid down her body.

"Are you nervous?" Bella asked.

"Yes." Edward's answer was simple and honest. "Though, how I feel is redundant because today is all about you and our girls." His hands were on her shoulders, resting gently at the base of her neck.

Bella stared into his beautiful eyes. "We're going to be parents today?" She put her arms around his waist, while curving her back so she could hug him despite her belly. Edward didn't say anything. He didn't have to because their minds were at the same place. The babies were to be delivered in a few hours by a planned cesarean section. Everything was ready. The nursery was stocked with diapers, wipes, nursing pads and onesies in every shade of pink. Well, the list was long.

"Let me wash you," Edward said after a moment of this precious silence between them. His hands were the embodiment of love as they caressed her and ghosted over every dip and swell. "Turn around." He worked the lather over her shoulders and down over her breasts, only to stop at her belly. His hands seemed small now compared to her body. "I can't wait to meet the girls, but I'm going to miss this beautiful and vivacious body." He kissed her cheek sweetly. "I've really enjoyed experiencing all the changes with you and watching your stomach grow."

Bella thought for a moment about all the times that Edward showered her with affection, before giving in to his fascination with her body. They weren't living in that strange asexual no man's land anymore, but had been able to find each other between the sheets as well as outside, too.

oooooOOOOooooo

Hours later, Bella was placed on a hard operation table in the cold OR. Her hand was annoyingly plugged into an IV and her back taped up protecting the small tube of the epidural, where a giant needle had been inserted into her spine. A blue curtain was pulled up to block her vision of her body.

Tears streamed from the corners of Bella's eyes rolling into her hair at the uncertainty of the entire situation. It was so hard to come to terms with the fact that this was it. Edward sat beside her dressed in surgical scrubs with her hand clutched between both of his. He couldn't hold her, but she knew he would if it were possible. Even though everything was going according to plan, Bella was practically frightened to death and the smells of the hospital made her stomach churn.

He leaned in and kissed her forehead, before he kissed some of her tears away. "Please don't cry, sweetheart. Everything is going to be fine."

"I'm not sad. I'm just so nervous and I'm scared."

"I know." Edward released her hand with one of his, stroking the last tears away. "My brave and beautiful woman. You're so strong and everything is going to be fine."

A figure crouched down beside her. "I hope those are tears of excitement," Carlisle said softly. He, too, was clad in scrubs with his hair concealed by a blue cap. "I'm so sorry. I'm a little late."

"Oh, Dad," Edward sighed. The relief in his voice was evident and some of the worried lines etched into his forehead eased up. Bella knew that Edward's back-up team had just arrived. Edward was Bella's and Carlisle was Edward's. They had agreed to ask if he would be present during the delivery. It seemed like a good idea as he knew his way around the place like the back of his hand.

"It's going to be fine, son. I assure you," Carlisle said. His voice was utterly sincere and that helped soothe some of Bella's nerves, too.

"Good morning, Dr. Cullen. Bella, we're about ready to start. There'll be some pushing and shoving, but you won't feel a thing," Dr. Greene promised.

"Okay." Bella's breath was shallow and she tried to keep her emotions in check. Everything had to be fine. It just simply had to be. Carlisle put a comforting hand on her shoulder.

Everything happened faster than expected. There was a lot a yanking that felt odd because the lower part of her body was completely numb.

"Here comes Twin A." A voice called. Bella's heart, which had been pounding heavily until now, turned into a frantic rhythm that made it hard to breathe.

The sound of whimpering erupted before it changed to an ear-piercing scream. Edward let go of Bella's hand, before going over to see where the doctor was checking the baby.

Edward's face was in complete awe and his eyes were brimming with tears.

"Twin B has now arrived," the same voice called again. Jeez, this was fast. Bella couldn't see a thing, while trying frantically to catch a glimpse of either of the girls. Her only consolation was the dual screaming filling the room and Edward's smile, as both girls were examined. They didn't seem to like it much.

"Carlisle, please check to make sure they're okay?" Bella sobbed, while feeling utterly helpless left on the table waiting for the doctors to finish. Right now, it was so unfortunate to be stuck on the table without the possibility of moving. She was desperate to see and hold her girls, but time seemed so insistent on dragging by.

"Of course, sweetheart."

"Edward?" Bella called, not knowing what to say. He looked away from the babies. His green eyes were full of wonder and love. He came over, crouched down beside her and kissed her face reverently, over and over again.

"They're perfect, baby. Absolutely beautiful." Bella reached out catching a few drops of moisture on his cheeks.

"Do you want the honors, Daddy?" a nurse in peach scrubs asked. Gently, the first of the girls were placed in his arms, all waddled up in pink blankets. Edward held out his arms and for the first time, one of his daughters lay safely in his arms.

"Let me see her." Bella had never felt so impatient in her life. There were so many things she wanted to do and so many things she wanted to say, but when she saw her, there was nothing. She just stared at the baby. "She's so tiny."

"I know. I think she weighs as much as a feather," Edward briefly laughed. "Just look at this perfect little girl that we created."

"Two girls." Bella snorted, while trying to control her tears so she could see better.

Carlisle crouched down next to Edward holding another little pink bundle. "Here's your other girl," he said softly.

"Hey, sweetheart," Bella cooed catching a glimpse of the small face. It almost felt repetitive. "They look exactly the same." She noted.

"Yes, they do. Congratulations both of you," Carlisle said warmly.

"Congrats to you too, grandpa," Edward countered.


	70. Epi, Part 8

**Later that day**

**Edward**

Late in the afternoon, they were all settled in at the hospital. There was finally a quiet hour. They had tried to keep visits to a minimum, but it was still hard to say no. Their families were curious, ecstatic and above all interested in the little bundles of joy. Everyone had been by, even Charlie, who was lodging with Edward's parents this time. Edward's sisters had taken turns holding them. At that moment, the fact that it was twins was just so convenient. There was one for each of his sisters to fuss over. Esme had tried hard to keep her tears in check and it almost worked. However, Esme was the one who knew exactly how to place a pillow behind Bella's back or when to say the right thing, after Bella's emotions suddenly seemed too much. She was a mother, which by association gave her a direct link to Bella's needs and feelings.

Bella lay in bed with the twin who was awake cradled to her chest. "It's so strange knowing that the world goes on, when something as big as this happens. I kind of expected it to stop," she mused quietly, while tracing her finger over the soft baby skin.

"I know. All of this waiting and the day is here and it feels so… normal," Edward answered and leaned over the side of her bed. He kissed her forehead. "How are you feeling? Any pain?"

Bella sighed. "I'm fine. My body just feels empty. I'm a little lonely in my own skin."

"That's understandable," Edward said softly. "You're so used to having these two hold parties inside of you." He looked at her adoringly for a several minutes. Then, his gaze shifted down to where the baby was latched onto her breast. "Does that hurt?"

"Not exactly, but I do feel it. I promise you she has a mouth like a vacuum." He smiled at Bella and gently stroked the baby's cheeks.

"It looks so comfy how you're all cuddling, snuggling and feeding. I have to admit I'm really jealous," he murmured. His eyes were wistful for a moment before he resolutely got up. Edward stood back, evaluated the room for a bit and then he pushed the spare bed over to line up next to Bella's, creating a makeshift king size bed. She stared as he rearranged the room, while not giving any explanation to what he was doing.

He pulled off his shirt and kicked off his shoes. Gently, he leaned over one of the cribs the girls was sleeping in and picked her up. Climbing into the bed, he carefully lay down as close to Bella as he could and on his back. Then, he placed the sleeping child on his bare chest and covered them both with a blanket. He looked down. "There," he murmured with satisfaction.

Bella giggled at him. "Very creative."

"Well, we couldn't just be left out of all the coziness, so we made our own, didn't we? Wait, which one am I holding?" Edward peaked under the cover.

Bella smiled at him and held up the small baby hand where the tiny nails were covered in bright red nail polish. "That would be Annaleigh you have there. Dakota is the one with the nail polish. Good thinking by Rosalie." When it had been clear to everyone that the girls were impossible to tell apart, except for the small bracelet on their ankles, Rosalie dug through her purse and held out a bottle of nail polish.

"Yeah, I don't want to sound ignorant, but it's going to take me few days to learn to tell them apart. I can't believe they look so much the same. I didn't expect that." Under the blanket, Edward ran his hand over Annaleigh's small back and he drew a slow and content breath. His eyes met Bella's. "This feels like heaven. It's like magic to finally be able to hold them. I love the feeling of her tiny body against mine. It makes me feel complete in a whole new way. I can't find the words to really describe it, but it's a very different kind of love and… can I say intimate?" Edward asked wryly.

"You can say that because that's what it is. What's more intimate than to lie here with you and the girls we made on the day that they were born feeling how much we all love and need each other."

Edward's nose was congested and his eyes were welling with tears, but he didn't care. He never needed to play macho with Bella. She understood him and right now, she understood exactly how overwhelmed he felt. She could put into words what he couldn't. He wiped his face and tried to clear his stuffy nose. "I never knew happiness could feel this intense." He softly kissed the small head exposed above the blanket. "I could get used to this. She's so light. Yeah, you can sleep on Daddy's chest any day of the week. Any time you want, baby girl. Both of you can."

"Edward?" Bella called.

He rolled his head to the side, while meeting the most beautiful brown eyes. "Yeah?" Bella's hands were cradled around Dakota, who had fallen into a safe and deep sleep in her mother's arms. Bella's eyes were pooling with moisture, too.

"Will you marry me?"

A wide and surprised smile crept over his face as he stared back astonished. "Are you proposing to me?"

"Yes," she answered confidently. "I am proposing. So I ask again, Edward Anthony Cullen, will you marry me?"

He leaned in, kissing Bella. "I hate to break this to you honey, but you are totally stealing my thunder."

"What?"

He chuckled. "I was actually going to ask you to marry me tonight. Got the ring in my pocket and everything." Bella's eyes widened and alarm crept into her gaze. Edward pressed his lips to hers again. "Don't worry, beautiful. Yes. Absolutely, I will marry you. I love you. I love everything about you. I love that you've got the balls to ask me. I love you more than I ever thought it was possible to love anyone," he whispered, as he leaned his forehead to hers. "I'll be honored to be your husband. But -" he teased. "I still want my shot later on, though it is nice to know your answer beforehand."

"Yay!" Bella's smile was so huge it looked like her face was going to break. "Thank you."

"Thank you? I don't think you need to thank me. I'm willing. I'm yours, baby." He paused for a moment. "You're so perfect."

"We're perfect for each other," Bella countered. "Forever."

"Forever," he repeated quietly, following the small breaths of his daughter who was sleeping on his chest.

"Can I see the ring?" she asked.

"Nope. Not until I ask you to marry me. I want a chance to do it right, but I promise you won't have to wait long."

oooooOOOOooooo

**This is it ladies, this was the last part. So what do you think?**

**Thank you all for adding me to your alerts, commenting and supporting this story. Your voice in your reviews means the world to me.**

**I have some people to thank, because without them this story would never have seen the light of day. **

**Chartwilightmom, who held my hand when this story was just a brainfart. Thank you.**

**Dazzled Eyes22, who weeded out all my mistakes and never losing her patience with me. Thank you.**

**AnnaLund, who has been a voice of encouragement in my darkest hours. Thank you.**

**Finally, I am currently writing the story of Ben. I'm not sure when anything will be ready for posting, but I will put up an alert here when that happens. **

**Thank you all for reading and following my story.**

**xoxo**

**Nelly**


	71. Heart and Soul

Hello Ladies,

Finally, and later than I anticipated, I am now ready with the first chapter of Benjamin's story. I promised you a long time ago that I was going to tell Ben's story and I meant that, it just took a while to get it out of my head and down on paper, so to speak.

I hope you remember this sweet boy, because he has been alive and kicking in my head for a while now. I hope to be able to deliver a companion piece that I am as proud of as I am of Out of Oblivion.

So for you Ben-lovers, the first chapter is posted here on FFN. Click on my profile and then _**Heart and Soul.**_

I hope to see you there.

XOXO


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